WORST FIRST DATE?! | EP 341 | ShxtsNGigs Podcast
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- Cool, as you know guys, I go straight with a nitty gritty. I go with the question of the week to start this episode fresh, to keep you guys energized, to keep you guys awake, to keep you guys alert. And you know how I like to do, we like to go in raw. - Selfish lover style. - Selfish lover style. - No lube bro, straight in. - No lube, no spit, no numb, straight in. The question of the week this week was, what's the worst or weirdest question you've been asked on a first date?

And obviously the responses are juicy. So we are going to go straight in to it. First one. - I just spilled mustard on my beard, bro. Sorry. - Why did you wipe your chest? - Because I assumed. - A man did this. - Because you know why? Because when this happens to me, I assume it just trickles. - So before I look, I want to cover all bases. I don't want to look and just see drenched. Pause. - Pause. - Sorry, sorry, sorry. - Say less. All right. What's the worst or weirdest question

- What? - What? - Did you do it again? - Nah. Do you know what it reminded me of? - What? - You know when, what was it? On White Chicks, where Terry drops the oyster. - Oh, and he slips. Yeah, yeah. - Oh, God. - I've got a big tongue, my bad. - Sorry, innit? - My tongue's too big for my mouth, not bad. Oh, yuck.

Terry was dirty in that movie. He's filthy, bro. He acted his ass off. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know what? Props. Sorry. Say what you want about Terry Crews. He acted his tits off in that movie. He acted his tits off in that movie, man. Fair play to him, man. Wow. Damn. Wow. Love a tangent. Love a tangent. But yeah, worst slash weirdest question you've been asked on a first date. Is it okay to tell my wife how the date is going?

She deserves an update. - She deserves an update. - Yeah. - 'Cause she could get replaced. - Facts. I need to let her know that she, yeah. - She needs to step her pussy up. - Yeah. - Next question. Who's your favorite serial killer? That's an eyebrow raise, isn't it? - To be fair, in this climate, I think a lot of girls will go for that.

It's one of them ones where you take a back step, but you're actually deep in like post date. Like I actually do like. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was gonna say. I actually do like why. It depends how you lead the way as well. Because like who's your favorite serial killer? Like I'm a Dharma fan myself. Then she'll jump in and be like, bro, fuck Dharma. Bro, Night Stalker. Are you mad? You don't know about Night Stalker. This guy was on stuff. This guy was on stuff. Yeah. Yeah. The one I've been watching, Sons of Sam. Of her. Woo!

The plot thickens every episode. Swear. Jesus wept. You man, so did Sam. Yeah, watch that shit. Is that... No, that's not... Who's the... Which one's the clown brother? That's... That's... His face is in my head. He's got tapes ting as well in it. The tapes of... Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

- Rimsky, what's... - John Wayne Gacy. - Come on, bro! - At least! - He's doing two jobs in one, man, he didn't even touch his keyboard yet! - Don't do that. - Yes I can, man! I wouldn't even have it, Rimsky. - I was literally waiting for a few hours to get it. - I wouldn't even have it! - I was waiting for a few hours to get it. - Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, some of us wait, some of us act. - Oh! - I'm playing, I'm playing, I'm playing, I'm playing, I'm playing, I'm playing, I'm playing, I'm playing, I'm playing. - Fuck! - John Wayne Gacy. - Gotta be a Civil War in this bitch. - Jesus!

Jesus! Some of us wait, some of us act. Remski!

- Personally, I'm just saying if it was me, the table would have been flipped by now. But anyway. - Wow. John Wayne, he came clutch with that. - Yeah, he came in quick. - Clutch. - Man's editing clips as we speak as well. That's nuts. - Oh, lower, lower, lower. - Oh, Rem's gone mute. - There's nothing for me to say.

- Literally nothing for me to say. - I can hear his K-Rod pinging. The loose heads are pinging out. - Pinging off, static. - Oh God. - Jesus. But yes, John Wayne Gacy is exactly who we're talking about. Fuck. - Wow. - Yeah, go. - Love a segue. - Worst/weirdest question you've been asked on the first date. Next question. Why are you a single mum? That's pressure. - Is pressure?

- It's also a valid question. - It's not a first date question. - It is not a first date question. - It's really not a first date question. - It's not in your fucking business, first and foremost. - Yeah. - Facts. - Get to know me first. - Yeah, facts. - Yeah. - I was also gonna say, you know when they, it's such a disrespectful question. You know when on like the show First Dates? - Yes. - It's always the question they ask, innit? Like, so why are you single?

- Yeah, yeah, yeah. If I wasn't single, I wouldn't be here. - Facts. She cheated and hurt me and left. - Facts. I need a son. - Yeah, why are you single? Facts. We could do this dance all day. - Yeah, bro. - Next question. What kind of brown are you? - Ah, that's infuriating. It's infuriating. - That there's just no decorum from where they come from. - I've been asked that question. - Really? - Yeah. - In that specific wordage?

what kind of brown are you? I don't think it was as brazen as that. But I've definitely been asked like, so what, like, I've definitely, yeah. - You had the hand! You have read this? - So what's your mix? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because I'm seeing like, I don't understand about the eyes. Like they try to make something close to the eyes. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Yeah, yeah, they mouth it. - Is there action in there?

- Man said this, they paint you with the same brush. - Bro, people make me feel bad for being like basic bitch white and black. - Okay. - When they do this. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. I hear what you're saying. - And then they're like, oh, my dad's this and my mom's that and they're like, oh. - Oh, they're like boring. - Oh yeah, oh so you're basic. - You're basic, you're just mixed. - Yeah, you're generation one mixed. - Yeah, oh God. - Yeah, yeah, it's boring. - Next question.

Has anyone ever lifted you up as an adult before? That's him trying to flex. I'm assuming. Either him trying to flex or him trying to insult. One of the two. Damn. Yeah. Didn't even deep about that. I deeped it straight as the insult. Like she's just fat. It's like, it's not possible. So has anyone ever tried? As an adult. Maybe as a child, maybe. Yeah. As an adult. Damn. Is your second toe bigger than your first big toe? I'd want to know as well.

- I wouldn't ask on the first date. - I wouldn't ask period. I would eventually see it. - You'd just find out. - I'd eventually find out and charge it from there. - And abandon her there. That's hilarious. - I would get into my, I'd be like, "Shoes off, shoes off, shoes off." - Yeah, come on, come on, Japanese style. Come on, come on, respect me, respect me, respect me. - Charged. - Yeah, yuck. If you can see it through your sock, that's nuts. If you can see it from the sock, it has to get charged. - Interesting. - Yeah, that's too much.

Hilarious. I told him my dad died and he asked me if I had daddy issues and winked. Do you know the confidence? Yeah, bro. You have to have. He died. I told him my dad died and he asked, so do you have daddy issues? You got daddy issues.

'Cause that's what I'm on the market for. - Yeah. - I'm just gonna be, I'm gonna put all my cars on the table. That's what I'm on the market for. - Another chick with daddy issues. - Daddy issues is where I'm at. So have you got it or not? - Facts. - That's crazy. - That is crazy. - That's crazy. - Imagine you double down and was like, find out. You tell me daddy. - Waiter bill. - I'm fam. - Waiter bill.

because I need to find out. It's a challenge now. - 100%. - It's a challenge now. - It's dread as well because then if she doesn't, if she gives you the example of potentially she does and you don't bring it out of her, it means Jordan's not daddy enough. - Fair play. - And then now you're butthurt going home like, it's actually me. - Yeah, damn. - She's got all the issues and I couldn't bring it out of her. - Damn. - Jokes. - We're sick in the head. - We are. We really, really, really are.

well you guys know when the room gets quiet sometimes when we're on tangents and i can't hear our voices anymore i think wow wow we actually just said that oh god always find the funny if you got pregnant tonight would you keep our baby damn next one if i meow would it purr or hiss back piss you know yeah people are actually crazy yeah go on you're gonna hate this one i bet

How much do you bleed when you're at the peak of your period? That's not. That's. Your face. That's not even a. Why do you need to know this? Also, in what quantity are we talking about? What's the measurement? I love how you get intricate. Bro, what's the measurement? Fair fucking play. Leers? Oh, God. Exactly. What is the measurement? Yeah. Is she going to do like hand gestures? Yeah. Yeah. Bro, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah. That's disgusting. All right. Next one.

Would my good little girl like a drink? I'd find that disgusting. That could leave my mouth. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That could never leave my mouth. I'm thinking he's just putting it all on black. Yeah. Facts. He's put it all on black. Facts, facts, facts. Because if it lands, boner. Yeah. If it lands, boner. He's put it all on black. Would my good little girl like a drink? Because you want to hear yes, daddy. That's all you want to hear. That's the only reply I need. But...

The time it takes to get that responsible feel like an eternity. Factual. Because you could go get arrested right now. You don't know what's going to happen next. Factual, bro. Damn. It's long. Some people are so brave. Some people misread the room. They do. They misread the room. They live their own bubble. Wow. Yeah. Next question. Is it crazy that I love you already? But just so you know, I have a girlfriend. Are you into polygamy?

Raw. Crazy. Again, all on black. Exactly. These men aren't willing to waste time. And as much as I think they're bastards and I'm vexed that I just know all of these are guys saying it to girls. Facts. I have to respect the confidence to a certain degree. Facts as well. So facts as well. Are your boobs naturally that small? Raw. That one took my breath away. I think naturally that's small. That's hands. Next one.

- Do you have a big clip? - I really like big clips. - Yuck. - Oh, this is the worst. I didn't, fam, when you read the question out here, I was thinking, this is so specific. I'm not sure like your- - Where the chaos can come from. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a small net we're using here. But Ra, you've picked up some koi fish. - Yeah, we've got an audience bro. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - We've got an audience. - Damn. - Picked up some koi fish. Damn bro. - Oh shit. - Wow. - Yeah man. Our audience are crazy.

Next question. Do you still live at the same address? Imagine. Do you still live at the same address? On a first date, James. I would grab it and say, who are you? The fear of God will run through me. Do you still live at the same address? Every stalker movie I've ever seen would rush through my head at the same time. Factual. Factual. You'd have to move. Yeah, 100%. Speaking of. I'll say no. That's the first thing I'll say is no. Again, but it's like, he knows you're lying. He knows you're lying. He's just playing a game with you.

I got, I ordered something on delivery the other day and came to my door, opened it, code, whatever. And I was like, oh yeah, Fuhad. And he looked down at his phone and saw Fuhad. He looked at me, he's like, oh, I was like, I have to move again. Now I'm thinking to myself, I have to move again. Isn't it the worst? I have to move. I was so angry. It's only been a week. Sorry, G. Anyway. Sorry, G. The guy who tried. Wow. Wow. Start again. Yeah. You good, you good. Wow. Um.

The guy who came to change my tire at my house the other day. Wow! There's pressure now! There's dementia! There's pressure now! That's like young dementia. The guy from Quick Fit who came to my yard to change my tire the other day. Yeah, same thing. Opened the door and was like, like reading the name is going to do anything. Facts!

And it was like, I was literally just watching you on Instagram. He's like, I didn't know you lived here. Of course you didn't. Of course you didn't. Why would you know? Why would you? Why would you? But now you do. Now you're going to run and tell all your fucking friends. Guess who I served today? You're moving. Next question. To be fair, he was a cool guy though. Yeah? Yeah, he was a cool guy. Say less. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Next question. Does your face make sense to you? Just a power in itself. Does your face make sense to you? To you. Why come on the date?

Why come on the date? If that's how you're going to behave? If that's how you're going to behave? Why are you here? Whatever happened to you wasn't my fault. So why are you treating me like this? I got dressed up. Facts. I put makeup on. I did this for you. For this. Waxed. Everything.

And this is what you're doing. - She can never tell me I got waxed. Even though I fucked up already. She was like, I got all this. I did all of this for you. My face. - You're sick in the head, Don. - You're actually sick. You're actually sick in the head. - I'm thinking, I nearly had an opportunity. - Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry. She said, if this date goes well, I'm putting this wax to use. You're livid about it.

What's wrong with you, bro? That's hilarious. Master. I couldn't hear what I said. Oh, it's gone. I've squandered it because of my foolishness. Oh, God. Oh, my gosh. Next question. Con. Not a question, but she said, if I had a dick, I'd make you suck it. Do you know the thing?

That would run through me across the table. That would terrify me. If I had a dick, I'd make you suck it. I wouldn't be able to stand up. I would be so scared. Because what are you going to do instead? Fam...

Where's your head at right now? Bro. Bro, I don't know why she thought that was okay. Mid appetizer. Yeah. If I had a dick, I'd make you suck it. The fuck? That's not tantalizing in the slightest. Bro, the whole thing's charged. That's when I'll say, does your face make sense to you? Because I'm defensive. What do you mean? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm in a corner. Yeah, yeah. I'm in a corner. He asked me not to wash my toes before the date. I didn't go. Oh, 100%. Not to wash my toes. That's a...

- Speaking of, that clip we posted the other day about me selling pics. - Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. - Foot pics. - The tootsies. - Plummeted. - No, I'm saying DMs. - Oh, I thought you were saying the- - I'm just here to talk out of league. - You got DMs from man and gal saying, "Show me your feet." - Man and gal. Predominantly gal. I expected it to be obviously predominantly man. - I thought that as well. - Yeah. - Interesting. - Yeah, gal would just say, "Name your price." - Interesting. - Yeah, I couldn't be bothered to entertain it though because like,

They don't know that I'm serious. - Yeah. - So don't make me bring you out the requests. - Yeah. - For foolishness. - Factual. - 'Cause I want P. - Factual. - I wanna sell pics for P. - Factual. - So yeah, there was one Donnie I know he was serious. - Talk to me. - He said, "Drop the link." With all caps, drop the link. Capitals will scare me. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - What was his profile pic saying? - Oh, it was jargons. I think it was like Khabib or something.

So I knew he was serious. I think it was a picture of Khabib, bro. - That's innuendo in itself. His feet are murked 100%. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Oh, that's jokes. - Man said, "Drop the fucking link." - All caps. - All caps. Jesus. - It's a bar. - Jesus. All right, I got a couple more.

I had a guy come to my house just for a coffee. I went to the loo. He ran up my stairs, burst into my toilet and asked me to piss on him. Said he'd been dreaming about it all night. The fact, you know, for these men where it's a compulsion. Yeah. That to the fact where he's like trying to keep it calm, keep it calm. And he realized she's going to obsess the piss. He said, no, no, no, no, no. I need it. I need it. First golden shower. Yeah. Facts.

I wish I felt that way about anything. - I know what you mean. - Where I can't sit still. And I'm willing to burn all of these bridges to get what I need. - Yeah, to fulfill my desires. - Yeah, I wish I felt enough passion about anything in my life the way that these man feel about fucking kinks. - Certain kinks. - Damn. - Yeah. - That's a cage, boy. - Bro. He burst into a stranger's toilet and said, "Piss on me."

That's insane. That's like a vampire needing blood. It literally is that. Because you're in her yard, my guy. It can happen later. It could. Let's go a few rounds. Let's get frisky. It could. Let's do some stuff and figure it out. Man heard two trickles and said, you're wasting piss. You're wasting the shower. You're wasting piss in this toilet, bro. I'm here. Yeah, piss on me. Wow, it's nuts. Wow, it's nuts. And again, like we said on the Patreon episode, um,

I lost my train of thought. The safety aspect is mad. Yes. The stuff women have to go through to get sex is nuts. And when I've always been like,

not understanding like why is women so like protective of like how many bodies they've got? Why is it protected how many bodies they got? The fact that you can invite a man into a yard who can burst in your toilet and beg you to piss on him. - That's the scariest thing I could ever encounter. - Bro. - Even the vice versa would freak me the fuck out. - That will send you back to every ex you've ever had.

- Facts, facts the street. - You're not fucking a new guy again. - I can't be in the streets. - Because we've had multiple dates and he was normal till now. Now he's in my yard and this is who he is. - He's showing his true colors now. - How did he hold it down for so long, bro? - He must've been itching at the table the first day. He couldn't think of anything else but that piss. - So yeah, inviting a new brother.

into your home is unsafe at times. - Yeah, that's on God. - And then going to his house is even more unsafe. - Yeah, true, true. - It's nuts, man. - It's a lose-lose. Last question. Can I pretend to propose to you to see if we get a free dessert? That's stupid. - Yeah, yeah, I was gonna say like, how can we reframe this to be a cute little first date game?

And I'm clutching at straws. Yeah, it's stupid. And also, in 2023, as a man, on a first date, you're not allowed to say free anything. Factual. Everything has to be expensive. Factual. And you want to pay more. Factual. It only costs two grand. Vexed. But your face says minor. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Your internal organs are vexed. Two grand, is that it? Yeah. I thought this was a nice place. Never mind. Must be happy hour. Boop. Anyway.

Go free, go free, go free, go free, go free, go free, go free, go free, go free, go free, go free, go free, go free, go free. I've been there, boy. Yeah. That green check. Yeah, yeah. No. Cabrini. Jokes.

Wow. Yeah, man. That's upsetting. It is upsetting. But that's it. Very nice. Welcome back, guys. Thank you for joining us today. This is episode 341, I believe, of the second best podcast in the world. Facts. Shits and gigs. Facts. With your boy, J Money and Fire Lord Fwakes. Facts. Now, if you didn't already know. Get to know. Get to know.

We're not going to say it too many more times. Head on over to patreon.com forward slash shits and cakes. We have categorically also the second best patron in the world.

And that's a fact. That's a fact. We flew over to New York a few weeks ago. We knocked on Patreon headquarters doors. They welcomed us in with open arms and said, oh my God, you guys are so good. How does your Patreon? Yeah, how's your Patreon so good? I'm like, get off me, man. I can't even breathe with all this smothering. Trying to talk business. And they were just like, just tell us, just tell us. If you want the job as CEO, you can have it. And I'm like, bro, all I care about is our patrons. I don't care about your fucking job, bro. Facts. Your stupid little headquarters. Facts. All I care about is our community. Facts. Facts.

So head on over there, man. Yes, sir. Three pound a month. Tenp a day. Run the pizza S&G and indoctrinate yourself into this community. Into this cult, if you will.

Or if you won't, some people don't like that term. Some people don't like the C word. - Some people don't like the C word. - Yeah, we found that out the hard way. Some people don't like the C word. Some people do like the C word. And if you do like the C word, head on over. If you don't like the C word, you could be a top boy. That's also what we use over there. - Yeah, you could be a top boy. - We wear multiple hats over there, guys. So head on over to patreon.com now, wear whatever hat you like and just vibe, bro. - Facts. - Vibe. If you are watching on YouTube and you aren't subscribed to the channel, make that change.

immediately right now come on man some people did it why not you yeah peer pressure and that do it um and then yeah if you're listening on any audio platform in existence please give us a nice review we really really really appreciate it five stars is obviously preferable um and five stars means good one star means bad by the way guys the amount of times i've seen reviews come through because they come through in emails to me i think i said before and it's like this is the best show i've ever seen i love this show i'm like gang and this is one star

- How is the confusion? - I thought it was obvious. Clearly not. We also do education over on patreon.com as well. So yeah, if you don't know stars, if you don't know your stars from your stripes, patreon.com/shitsandgigs. - Don't be a dick. - Run the P. - S and G. - Right. So enough shenanigans.

Last week, Ellis won top five. I think we should give him a round of applause because he's been suffering. He's been suffering. Our little porno king over there. He's very proud of himself. Our little porno king. Let's go. So yeah, let's do top five and see who wins today. Yes, sir. Everyone got their boards and markers. Right, guys. Top five, top five, top five this week is...

highest paid athletes of 2023 so far interesting athletes yeah highest paid athletes of 2023 so far if it was 2022 i think i'd have a better grasp of this 2020 i've also got 2022 because obviously the year's complete so it's up to you man i've got both

Now I'm going to go back on myself because I've built it up and then you've given me the opportunity to actually deliver. I'll go 2023. That's what I thought. That's exactly what I thought. That's exactly what I'm going to do. 2023 it is. Ellis, I believe in you. I don't watch any sport. Doesn't matter, bro. You don't watch any sport at all? No, man. Why? I've never been into sport. Boxing, that's probably the only thing, but not even, even boxing. Don't really watch it that much. Now, are these...

I'm assuming retired athletes don't count, right? They do not count. Okay. Good clarification. They do not count. Let me just double check that actually. They do kind of count, but let me say this. When you say retired, I'm not talking about like from like the 1970s. They probably retired within the last few years because I've just checked one that's on the list and said person has retired. Can I research someone? Because I don't know if he's retired or not. I think he is, but I'm not sure.

- It's not gonna show me if they're, what their net worth is or whatever. It's not gonna show, no, it's not gonna show me. - Just write the name down, bro. What do you mean? What are you trying to check? If he's retired or not? - Yeah. - It doesn't matter if he's retired or not. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - It doesn't matter. - It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. First of all, sometimes I really don't like how you speak to Ellis. I really don't like it. You talk to him like he's an idiot sometimes. I don't like it. Be nicer. - You all do, it's fine. - We all do.

- Wow. - You did it, for real? - First of all, I literally just stood up for you. - First of all, Ellis, if that's how you took it, I apologize. - I'm joking. - It's just more of a, you know. - No, we don't know. What is it? - Well, because you got heat in the first half, you're trying to come for me now. - No, no, no, I'm just wondering what you were gonna say. I was curious 'cause I was wondering what you were gonna say then. - Write your answers, man. - Oh, cool. - Write your answers, man. - I didn't think that was literally, yeah. - Write your answers, Rev. - Why are you coming for me? - That's a dead end.

Cool, we're all locked? Yeah. Cool, Ellis, give me your top five. So I've gone for... Is this order or is it just five? Either way, it doesn't... Yeah, it doesn't. No, I won't do an order. Okay, cool. Ronaldo, Messi, Michael Jordan. Is it... I don't know if it's... Say what's on your board, my bro. Fuck's sake, this is what happens every time. Tyson Fury, and then...

I said, I don't know why. I can't think of any more. The self-deprecation from your voice, Ellis. Dude, because I'm fucking, I'm terrible with it. Yeah, but who says who, man? You have no idea if you're right or wrong. Stop with this. I'm also getting confused as well. So I said Michael Jordan, but then I'm thinking I've got it mixed up with someone else. I doubt you've got Michael Jordan mixed up with someone else. Facts, first of all. If you have, you're a fucking racist. I'm joking. Look at his face now.

Relax, Ellis. All right. It's a safe space. It is a safe space. Chill, bro. And yeah, stop talking down on yourself. The confidence in the way you read it, it stresses me out, man. Give me a porn category. Yeah. All right, Jimmy. I hated this one, actually. So I did Messi, LeBron, John McGregor, and Tom Brady. Tom Brady's a great shot. I don't think I've landed, though. Rem? I've got...

Ronaldo, Messi, LeBron, Neymar. I was going to write Neymar. And my last stab in the dark was Anthony Davis.

- That is a stabbing dog. I was thinking for a second, who the fuck is Anthony Davis? - For a split second I was like, who? - Literally. - I was writing it down, I was thinking, who am I writing? But yeah, say less. - Do you know what's actually a piss take? He's just told you Anthony Davis is not in that list. - Yeah. We already know that I'm actually down one right now. So it's key. - He just told you to your fucking face, you got it wrong. Wow. Composure, please. - Yeah. Games master, come on.

Absolutely sweeted. Right. Number 10. Number 10. Oh, I like when you do that 10 to 1. With $92.1 million made. KD himself, Easy Money Sniper, Kevin Durant. Props to him. Very, very huge props to him. Slim Reaper. Number 9, 95.1 M's, the retired Roger Federer. That's who I checked.

Damn. I retired either this year or last year. I can't remember. Didn't see that one coming. Yeah. Number eight with 100.4 M's. Steph Curry. Interesting. Is he still with Under Armour? Second, sir? No, I do. Pardon? Huh? Who was it? No, I thought you said something. I missed what you said. Oh, I said, is Steph still with Under Armour? I believe so. Is that where he makes his bag? Yeah, I think so. Number seven with 106 millimetres.

Phil Mickelson. He plays golf. Nice. Yeah. 106 M's. Mickelson. Mickelson. I was thinking, who the fuck is... Mickelson, yeah. Phil Mickelson. Mickelson, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 107 million. Number six. Again, golfer. Dustin Johnson. Seriously? Yep. Is that what he's golfing on? Yep. I remember watching the show. Was it called Swerve? Swerve? Nah, it was called... Full Swing. Full Swing. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

You are too far off to be fair Yeah they were making Money in that show They were PJs galore Yeah Damn Golf might be the new Yeah it might have to be the new Yeah Yeah the new swang Pause With 110 million In at number 5 Boxer Even though you didn't write any boxers down I did You did Tyson Fury Tyson Fury You did

Canelo Alvarez. Fair play. 110 M's. Number four, 119.5 M's. Only two of you wrote this down. LBJ himself, LeBron James. Okay. Number three, with 120 M's, Mbappe himself. Mbappe, you know. Kylian Mbappe. He's like 21, 22.

Maybe 23 max. And he's number four in the world. Number three. He's number three in the world. Of course he is. Fuck! Yeah. That's too much. I'd be addicted to heroin. I'd literally be addicted to heroin. There's no other like what? Where am I getting joy from? Yeah, nothing else fulfills me. Because football is just fun for me now. I've made all the bags I need for it. Bro, crush my ACL. It literally doesn't matter. I'm calm. Facts, bro.

Facts. Number two with 130 M's. Everyone wrote this down. Messi. And number one with 136 M's. It's pretty obvious. Cristiano Ronaldo. So we have a tiebreaker. And the only way I think we can settle this tiebreak. Let me see if they go further than 10. So just to...

Just to recollect, your other two was McGregor and Tom Brady. Rem, your other two was Neymar and Anthony Davis. For the people, you guys already know what you wrote for the audience. Now I'm livid about the Neymar team. Just put me on my misery, bro. Number 11. With 87.6 million. Baller. Who does he play for? Not Minnesota. Yeah. Minneapolis. Is it Minneapolis? Yeah.

- Giannis. Is it Minneapolis he plays for? - Minnesota. - Minnesota, yeah. - Timberwolves, doesn't he? - Milwaukee Bucks. - Milwaukee Bucks, wow. - I knew it was an M. - Timberwolves, you know. - I knew it was an M. - Bucks, causing those little bucks, shameful behavior. Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry. - Was number 11. - First of all, the way you built that up and it was none of our answers is actually mad. - That's crazy how you did that. - Number 12. 85 men, 85 Ms. Footballer, only goes by one name, Neymar.

Well played. Let's just see where the rest were. If they were in here. Anthony Davis, 40. Fair. See? Very fair. Tom Brady's not in any of this. I'm looking for both of their names. That stab in the dark was a good one. Anthony Davis. Tom Brady, number 50. He just made the list. Damn. McGregor's not even on the list.

He would have been last year. He was number one. Or maybe a couple of years ago. Yeah, 2021. I think he was number one. Yeah, he made money. Was that proper 12? Yeah. He was making money. So yeah, Rem, what's that now? Is that 10 for Rem? Double Dij. I was nine last week. Oh, you were nine last week? Yeah, so yeah. So yeah, Double Dij. All right. So was it 14, 9, 4? 14, 10, 4. 14, 10, 4. Come on. All right. Ellis, man. I'm going to try to help you out next week. I'm going to try.

I'm going to try. GG's. GG's indeed. That was a good one. I liked it. Right. So this again, shout out to Six Brown Chicks. They have the best dilemmas. They're hitting with dilemmas. It's frustrating. I don't know how they curate such good dilemmas all the time. And even the thing is, even if they got a ghost writer, he's on job. Yeah, facts.

So I wouldn't even be mad if they were like, oh, they're all fake. We've just got a ghostwriter. I'd be like, it's fair. Sick. It's got pen game. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Causing arguments. Yeah, bro. Right. So my boyfriend and I eat in bed. If we're high, we may include food in our sex play and fall asleep with crumbs on the sheets. Oh, my God. Oh, tell me about it. Oh, my God. So he was going down on me when he swears he saw a cockroach come out of me.

I may have roaches. So maybe a roach came. The confidence to say I may have roaches is nuts. I may have roaches. So maybe a roach came out from under the crease slash fold in my stomach. But I thought you were talking about duvet on your stomach. This has gone from bad to worse. Tell me about it, bro. Who are we fucking? Bro. Continue. The confidence to type this out.

So maybe a roach came out from under the crease slash fold in my stomach, but I know it didn't walk out my pussy. He argues I definitely crawled out from inside of me and he won't see me again without a doctor's note. That's on God. That is on God. Bro, that's 10 toes. I ain't coming back in here unless you've seen a physician, my guy. Oh.

- Oh my God. - Right. I refuse to go and see a doctor. 'Cause if it was a roach in there, he saw it crawl out. So it's gone. What's a doctor gonna do? - Bro. - Nah. - He should take my word that I don't have a roach cooch, but he's avoiding me. Advice. - No. - Bro. - There is no advice.

- Oh, the whole dilemma is so marked. - Bro, first piece of advice is get your life together, 100%. - Get it together. - The fact that she said I may or may not have crotches, but that's neither here nor there. - It's neither here nor there. Don't quote me on my hygiene. But I know I ain't got no roaches in my palm. That's a fact. - But it may have crawled out my fold or crevice.

I thought she was gonna talk about the linen in the sheets, son. - There may be roaches in this yard, so if it came out of the sheets, fair play. - My stomach. - Yeah, that's insane. - Who are we fucking, bro? This is not okay. - Bro. - This is not okay. - It's nuts. It's nuts, bro. - And she said that with such chest that it could be a plausibility. - Yeah, yeah, facts.

And she's not willing to see a doctor about this. Bro, see someone. You have to see, you need to get someone to hose your yard from head to toe.

because that's unacceptable behavior. - The fact that she said, if it was in there, and then she said, she was like, listen, I'm 99% certain it's not in there. It wasn't in there. But if it was, then it's gone. - It's gone. - So it's gone. - You can relax. You can eat me out as you were before. - Yeah, facts. I'm honestly saying there's a nest in there. - There's eggs in there. - Yeah, they're breeding in there. Go see someone about it. She's like, what's the point? If it's gone, it's gone. What are we gonna do about it? - What's she asking advice for?

- She's saying, yeah, the advice she's asking for is he ain't coming home until I've seen a doctor. I promise you now I'm not gonna go see a doctor about this foolishness. What do I do? I want my man, but I'm not going to see a doctor. - She probably doesn't wanna see a doctor because she's scared of the repercussions. She's scared to know what the doctor's gonna say to her. - Brother, if a roach crawled out my body,

- First of all, you'd feel it. - Yeah. - First of all, you'd feel it. - The fuck? - Feel it, feel it. But I'll sprint to a doctor. Even if it came from under my stomach, I'll sprint to a doctor.

i'll take any doctor that will have me thanks because i don't even know how i would start that conversation bro a roach called us somewhere help that's what i'd run into emergency room and say that i wrote called us somewhere i need an mri help me i need a scan yeah yeah yeah she needs to what she needs to do is forget about this entire relationship and focus on this 100 because this

Yeah. And this? Yeah. They're not aligned. They're not connecting. They're not connecting. Because at the minute, all I'm hearing is pussy and stomach. Yeah. Oh. Food, play and roaches. Yeah. And folds in the garden. That garden must be a tip. It stinks in there. She's so nonchalant about the fact that she may have roaches. The yard must be a state.

Crumbs in the sheets is my number one pet peeve, by the way. Oh, no, that's impossible. Crumbs in the sheets is my number one red flag. That's impossible. If I get in a bed and feel anything... Yeah, it's long. I'm jumping out and I'm kissing my teeth and I'm getting carpet burned from the way I'm doing this. I'm getting carpet burned on my palm. I'm livid about it. This is a paid advertisement for BetterHelp. Bro. Talk to me. Real quick, ask me what my self-care non-negotiables are. What? Grounding. Grounding.

Wim Hof breath work. Yeah. Eight hour sleep. Non-negotiables. Those are three perfect non-negotiables. And I'm proud of you. Thank you very much. I'm very, very proud of you. It's like when people say never skip leg day, but it's never skip therapy day. We all know how easy it is for our schedules to become overwhelmed with social gatherings and other obligations that leave us struggling to make time for the things that fill our own cups. 100%. It's like when your schedule is packed with big work projects and more.

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Betterhelp.com slash gigs pod today to get 10% off your first month. That's better help. H E L P.com slash gigs pod. Pointless is pointless antics. I can't help you. You need, you need to help yourself, bro. There's no other solution. You have to help yourself because hard reset. You can't, you can't be comfortable with,

and confident in saying a cockroach could have fallen out of the fold of your stomach. - But facts, but coulda, woulda, shouldas, we're not here to talk about that. That's what she's saying. Coulda, woulda, shouldas, that's not the point. - It's not the point. You're saying the cockroach is gone to still eat me out. What we doing, bro? What we doing here, man? - I would say charge all of this whole ting, hard reset, volume up, volume down, hold for three seconds.

Yeah, let's start again because this whole thing. How did we get here? How did we get here? I'm just remembering you said if this is a ghostwriter, the pen game is crazy. The pen game would have... Jesus! Nuts! Nuts! If it's a ghostwriter, how are you thinking of these things? The term ghostwriter is hilarious as well, by the way. I don't know what's going on. But anyway, that's a disgrace. That's been in my screenshots for weeks. That is a dilemma. Dilemma.

- And the annoying thing is, - Sorry, go on. - I was gonna say the annoying thing is, this is obviously not the first time these men have been banging in this way with this food play and weed play or whatever in the boudoir. So it's like, this is like, this happened one out of probably 50 times. And it's like all the other times there could have been stuff around you, stuff in you. And I'm like, I've just been continuing not knowing. - What I was gonna say is that Donnie,

needs to have a hard reset because the fact that this is his final straw is

And man said, I'm not coming back without a doctor's note. Don't go back period. - Period, he wants to go back. - You couldn't tell me this story from your POV of like, brother, you'll never guess what when I went round my girls' yard yesterday. And I'm like, oh God, bro, obviously so. You know how it gets like, sometimes we like to eat in bed and I'm like, yeah, obviously who doesn't? And when we get a bit high, we kind of like fucking around with the food and that. And I'm like, I don't know what that means, but carry on. - Continued. - Facts, facts. - Don't know what that means, but carry on.

Yeah, sometimes they get like a little crumbs in the bed and all them things. I'm like, jarring, but carry on. Where are we going with this? And it's just like, bro, I was down there. Obviously, there's food here, there's food there. And I'm thinking, what is he talking about? Facts. And then, bro, I swear to God, I see a roach come out of my palm. I hold my breath.

to let you land yeah and i'm like cool and then you'll be like obviously i jumped up yeah and i was like no no no no no roach roach she's like oh bro erosion climb out my pump and obviously i'm like big man i promise you now i saw it come out your pump still hold my breath yeah um and then

And then you saying to me like, bro, do you know what she tried to say? She tried to say like, obviously there's probably is roaches in the yard. Still holding my breath. I take another, I take, yeah, yeah, yeah. Purple face. I was thinking, he's not landed. And she's like, obviously there's probably roaches in here. And if you did see it, like I'm not even dare going to call you a liar. But if you did see it, it probably came out of my stomach. I was grabbing sight and throwing it at you. Wake up. Wake up. This is not getting any better. Wake up.

- Bro, you lost me at the first bar, my guy. - Oh my goodness. - And now I'm really deep in what you meant when you said we fuck around with the food. - Yeah. - What the fuck is wrong with you? What the fuck is wrong with you, bro?

- What are you doing to her? - Oh, bro. - You're scaring her, what are you doing to yourself? - Bro, yeah, hard look at yourself in the mirror, a hard reset for the both of you. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - That's all wrong. - Start again. Fuck. - But it's also one of them ones where, let's say I am that breader in that scenario and I charge her. Like I've lived a fantasy with this drawn. Do you know what I mean? Cockroach or no cockroach? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I've lived a fantasy. - Before the cockroach, you're not getting this again.

That's why he said he's not coming back with that. The doctor's not. Because I have to come back. He has to come back. I have to look after myself at the same time. There's no one else that's going to facilitate this kink for me.

And even if there is, how do I introduce this into our lives? Yeah, this took years. This took years, bro. I can't start again. Yeah, it's long. Oh, this part is so long. Oh, fuck it out. Anyway, what have we got? We've got trash news now. Please, Rem. All right, hit us up, Rem. Woman fatally poisons boyfriend hours after he inherited 13 million. Hours is brazy. Hours is quick work, isn't it? Hours is brazy. Yeah, she...

- Yeah, wait, I didn't even think about that. - Plotting and scheming. - Plotting and scheming. - That is super quick, damn. A North Dakota woman poisoned her boyfriend after learning of his plans to leave her since he had recently inherited $30 million. - Facts? - Facts. - Facts what? - Sorry. - No, no, no, no, no, don't continue, Rem. Facts what? - Facts what? - Nothing, nothing. - No, facts what, James? - I thought there's two more paragraphs. Let's dive in, what? - Let's dive in, gents.

- It's really cooking. I just lost myself in the team. - Yeah, but I don't know what you're facting to. I need to know. He's up now. He needs to be single. He wants to go to Miami. - That's not what I thought you said facts for. - Oh, the death? - Yeah. - Oh, no, no, no, no. I was talking about facts for, yeah. 30 Ms. - Yeah. - Okay, okay, okay. - Now he needs to be single. That's what I thought he meant. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - What did you think he meant? - What do you think I meant? - I thought you meant, I thought you were taking- - I was the woman. - Yes, bro! - I don't know, facts. - That's what I'm saying. I was like, what are we talking about?

Sorry, sorry, sorry. Nah, Donnie, Donnie, Donnie. Okay, okay, okay. I'm on the first jet out. Okay, okay, okay. Sailor, sailor, sailor, sailor, sailor, sailor. Yeah, sorry, carry on. Yeah, yeah, true. An autopsy indicated that Riley died as a result of consuming antifreeze, which authorities claimed Kanoya, his girlfriend, fed him. In the days preceding up to her arrest...

The alleged killer declared her innocence in a series of bizarre Facebook posts saying Riley had took his own life away. Oh, that's peak. Bro. That's peak. Crazy. So he inherited 30 M's and killed himself. That's what she's trying to... That's what she... That's what you want us to believe. That's what she wants... And she's putting it on Facebook. Yeah, on Facebook. No wonder he had plans to dump her, bro. If she was on that much smoke... Facts. Posts, this whole shenanigans. Yeah. During the time when he was actually here...

For sure. Her grandma's awful as well, took his own life away. Yeah. What are we talking about? I can't even, it's weird because the lengths, I'm not even going to say women, the lengths people are willing to go to when they figure out

something is no longer going to go their way oh bro is fucking insane i don't care if i've won a billion dollars a billion pounds and i want to leave you if we've been together for 10 years it's my choice you can't come and tell me you're gonna kill me bro i sometimes i feel like i'm an alien when i hear about like

When you hear stories about like this kind of thing, not even to this extent, but when like Donnie's are like, big man, I'm charging this relationship. I'm out. Like male or female, whoever's just like, fuck this, I'm gone. Or like I've found someone else. I'm moving in with them. My mentality is always like...

Game is the game, bro. I'm fucking upset. But the game is the game. I will never try and convince anyone to stay anywhere that they don't want to be. But this whole like, you're not leaving me, big man. What are you talking about? You're not going anywhere. You can die if you think you're going. And it's like, life's changed now. It's just different. Facts.

Deal with it. - Facts. - What the hell is going on? It's like, I didn't waste seven years with you for you to pack your bags and dip. It's not happening, bro. You're not going anywhere. - Literally in their heads, the only way they can stop me is by killing me. - Facts. - That's just not okay, bro. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then she just did it. - Hours later. - She heard he was scheming to dip, so she said, "You can die then."

And she said on Facebook that he killed himself. That double down is crazy. She needs to get double charged for that. Yeah, yeah. Because that double down is crazy. Don't spin lies on my social media either. Yeah. That's insane. It's crazy how much people change though when they come into big money like that. Facts. Well, this is a very, very, very dark topic and I've spoken it before. I wouldn't be surprised if someone did a poll of the amount of people that are in relationships with

because they need to be in it as opposed to because they want to be in it. Nuts. Bro, the amount of like, like even like you'll see like, now you know like your typical like,

Cockney mid 40s like relationship. Yeah. Where they're like, oh, I wouldn't kick her out. I wouldn't kick her out of bed. And they're like, oh, you're a slag. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Fat prick. And this is spouses. And then you're just like, bro, if either of these men had the deck of cards that they wanted, they'd be gone. And it's like bare people just work, especially where you've got relationships where like,

one person in a relationship is the breadwinner on all these kind of things. Especially if you've got like 50-50 relationships where it's like the hassle. It's not even the case that you have to be here. But it's like, I could be unhappy in this relationship. But the thought, because I've been in it before. When I was like living with my ex before, bro,

the thought of living back with my mum was worse than your current situation. - Than my current situation. So I was like, I would rather be in this relationship that I don't wanna be in, than have to pack my bags, embarrass myself, tell all my family and friends that we're not together anymore, move back in with my mum, have to deal with her asking me, "Am I all right? Are you all right? What's going on with this? When are you gonna move out?" Me thinking, when am I actually gonna even have the money for a new, for deposit on a new place, all these things. And then once you get into that head space, you're like charged.

- Charged. - Charged. - I'm gonna stay. - Charged, I'm staying where I'm at. I'll just remain unhappy. 'Cause I'm not dealing with all of that. So yeah, 30 M's? - Gone. - Gone, bro. Gone, same day, gone. Same day, gone. I don't need this. - Don't try to bell you, dialtoad. Dialtoad. Dialtoad. That'll put a fear of God in them. Where's he gone?

- Where is he gone? - The love of my life. Just inherited 30 M's and I'm at Waitrose picking up celebration dinner and I'm belling her and it goes to tone. The number you called has not been recognized. - Oh, oh, oh, oh. - Oh, yes. - I'll break down in the supermarket, bro. - Oh, f*cks. - It's a control alt delete situation. The whole thing is charged. The whole thing is charged. - Nah.

That's insane. Yeah, it's crazy. Damn. All right, fair play. Okay, cool. So guys, girls, it is time for the final chapter. Oh, Dr. McAllister. Yeah, of our four part series. I forgot about this. Dr. McAllister's Captive God. So if this is your first introduction to the

Dr. McAllister's Captain of God. Basically, what's happened is we have this guy or girl. I don't even know. Yeah. We don't even know who the main character is right now. I don't think I know. We don't know their name. We don't know their gender. We don't know their age. All we know is they were seeing a therapist called Dr. McAllister. And whilst in catatonic states or sleepy states or whatever, this person has the ability to just...

speak truths that they don't know how they came about. And now Dr. McAllister, and they told Dr. McAllister about things about his past, about his future, about things he should do with his money, about this, about the relationships, about everything. So Dr. McAllister is so convinced that this person is a god that they've decided to kidnap our MC and

Keep them in his basement for God knows how long. Inject them with drugs to knock them out so they can keep doing all this future telling shit. And then, bro, and then he's now brought in all of his boys, his wife, all of his associates to get their fortune told. All these men are making money

They've now upgraded their bando from Dr. McAllister's basement to a yard in the middle of nowhere where our MC is now tied to a bed and is just rich Donnie smoking cigars. And it's just in and out of haze. Yeah. Man tried to run away and he drapes his neck with a needle. Bro. That will put the fear of God in me.

When he said he was in the kitchen and then one person was like, you shouldn't be here. Go back downstairs. Go back downstairs. Go back downstairs. And then more people come and he's like, let me go. Let me go. And he tried to climb outside. Yeah, he tried to climb outside. He ejected, man. Yeah. Oh, it's literally like a movie. Bro. Jesus. I'll read the last paragraph and then we're moving on. Okay. Cool. I spent a lot of my days in a black stupor and the more they experimented, the more often I was back in the black place.

Hmm.

Not till the day it all came to an end. All right, we're finishing this bitch today, guys. Buckle up. Right. I came to one afternoon to find an intrusive light leaking in my dark chamber. They'd always kept me in this persistently dark room, but now the door was open and something was laying in it. On the floor, there were others, none of them moving, and I was confused by their sudden stillness. Was this something new? Were they sleeping or were they...

I tried to put that out of my mind. They couldn't be dead. I reminded myself as I shook my chains. If they were all dead, then who would free me? So I didn't die here too. You know what's so jarring about that? What? Is that like, there's just no way out for this person. I would love to wake up and think, I don't know how this happened, but all these fuckers are dead. I'm out of here. First thing is like, who's going to get me out? Facts. Damn right. I did as you said.

Oh. Jesus, that's bad.

but something clicked in his shaking hands. I saw he had a gun. I was afraid that he would shoot me. I was afraid that he would shoot me too for half a second, but as he put it under his chin, I became even more afraid that he would use it on himself. I have risen as high as I can. Your will dictates that I must shed my vehicle to rise any higher. I shall see you on the other side.

His blood made a crimson line across my face as the gun went off and suddenly my fear was realized. I was alone. Luckily for me, someone heard the gunshot. I would lay in that bed for two days before the FBI came to investigate the compound. It turned out they had been keeping an eye on McAllister for quite some time, ever since he had started gathering followers at his home.

After two years in his new compound, they had been trying to prepare a case against him before he woke up one morning and decided to put an end to his little flock. With the help of his wife, they had poisoned the morning meal and McAllister had drawn his inner circle into a meeting before breakfast where he shot them and they sat and listened to my latest... As they sat and listened to my latest ramblings, they had found journals that claimed...

These were things I had told him to do, but after interviewing me, I think they decided he was out of his mind. At least, that's what Agent Maxit led me to believe. We're going to have to hold you as a person of interest, but it honestly sounds like you were an unwilling participant. I'm going to go and get some things in order, have a seat in here and we'll make some accommodations for you. After he left, I noticed the recorder sitting on the table.

It wasn't running, which I expected, and when I reached for it, I saw that the tape inside had a date on it that I remembered. It was the date of my first session with Dr. McAllister. I couldn't imagine a reason behind the FBI having a tape with that date unless McAllister had recorded it for some reason. I put the recorder back down, trying to stop my curiosity before it could take root.

I had never heard what I sounded like in that state that seemed to enrapture the old doctor so much. What had I said to him to make him throw his whole life away in pursuit of it? I couldn't help myself. I hit play on the recording and listened as Macalester told me to be calm and began to count down from 10. It wasn't the jagged, often flightly voice I remembered from any time after this session. This was Macalester at his most sane.

and as he came to one, I heard him gasp and ask what I was doing. From the recording, I heard a slightly deeper version of my own voice, and it filled me with dread. Agent Maxit has listened to the tapes, and he's becoming as unstable as the good doctor. If you don't escape now, I fear that he'll have you just like Macalester did. You have to be quick, and you'll have to be smart."

But if you mean to be free, you need to find a way out of here. Good luck. Who's saying this to him? This is the voices hearing on the tape from Mechanic's first session. Oh my God. Oh my God. So he's talking to himself? He's talking to himself two years in the future. What? Bro. Duh.

Is that the end? Yes, the end. Oh my God. I was locked into like the precinct and everything. I was there, bro. The precinct. I was there. Bro, yeah. So yeah, it ends with my guy's own voice from his first session with Dr. McAllister telling him Agent Maxwell's on it as well. Get the fuck out now. Otherwise we're running this whole thing back. Oh my God.

God. Brother. Very good story. Very, very, very, very good story. That's probably why. How were you able to know this? That's why he kept it. Yeah. Thanks, bro. Jeez. Yeah, boy. Yeah. Pen game is wavy on that as well.

- Unbelievable. So yeah, I'm gonna take a few weeks off, maybe a couple months off and then we're gonna find another one. - Yeah, that was a good story. - Yeah, man. All right. So you've got a recommendation for us apparently. - I do have a recommendation and I don't know whether, I feel like this was recommended to us in one of our monthly Zoom chats, but I went to Chiharu's yesterday and he intro'd me to an anime. - Okay. - So we were talking about, obviously he's seen JJK, blah, blah, blah, today, whatever. And he's like, "Oh, there's another one I've been watching."

Shangri-La Frontier. Never heard of it. Shangri-La Frontier. Oh, I've seen clips of this on TikTok about the, it's like the hardest game in the world or whatever. Yeah. So it follows this guy, how do we say it? Rakuro, but he's a Hidzu warrior.

He's a Tomei, right? He loves games. He loves VR games. And basically all he wants to do is find the best, the hardest game and try and obviously win. He does like trash VR games. He goes through all the time and a lot of them always have like bugs and glitches and blah, blah, blah. But he then finds this game, Strangler Frontier. He goes to a store and finds one. And when he gets immersed into it, it's like...

This is real life. Like he puts on the VR set and everything. And when I say the storyline is... The storyline is really good. The animation is crisp, my bro. Okay. Crisp. I wouldn't say it's on a level of like JJK or whatever, but it's...

cheerio described it perfectly it's very very refreshing to see okay it's very very very refreshing to see there's only a few episodes out maybe eight or nine yeah so the um i'm

I want to say, obviously, he's immersed in the VR world. It actually has all the gaming upgrades. It shows you the gaming upgrades. It levels up from level one to level two. So is that Sword Art Online? Sword Art Online per se. But the way it shows is crisp. Like every hit he does, it shows like critical, critical, critical. Oh, okay, sick. And he's got like his whole book on like...

When you get points and stuff, you like divvy out the points to like agility, to health, to this, to that. Like it shows it all. It's well-paced. But the whole crux of it is he... I think in episode three I've seen, yeah. He wants to...

His main goal is to just DAPI something. - Okay. - His main goal is to DAPI something. And the arms is good. - All right. - The arms is really good. - I'm down to watch this. - But when I say that animation is so crisp. - Okay, sick. - So, so, so, so crisp. - Sick, sick, sick, sick, sick, sick. - Yeah, it's a really, I've only seen three episodes so far.

It's a really good watch. All right. I know I'll catch up in a day and it will piss me off. It's a really, really, really good watch. Especially if you're up to date on everything, anime-wise, this is a really good shop. All right. I've got a recommendation. Before I do, off the back of you saying being up to date,

I have to take accountability. I have to finish Attack on Titan this week. Oh, wait. I still haven't. Like I said to you last, I still haven't watched from the day he became the founding Titan to now the whole thing's done. I haven't watched anything. You've got episodes plus two movies. Yeah. I need to finish it. I need to bang it out because it's done. It's the end of an era. I started watching this when we were in uni. So I still watching this.

10 years ago? 10 years ago. And now it's finished and I'm just chilling and everyone's talking about it. So, you're done? No, I've not seen the last movie. I've seen the first movie. All right, bet, bet, bet, bet. But my recommendation is on Netflix and it's Blue-Eyed Samurai. Okay. You, man? Yeah, yeah. You, man? Okay. So, Blue-Eyed Samurai, yeah, on Netflix. It is a...

Anime, but like English spoken. I was, as I was watching it, I was like. - Nine out of 10, 100%. Okay. - Bro. - Okay. - It's hot. - Okay. - One thing I would say is I know you love to watch shit in Japanese. - Yeah. - It's mouthed in English. So it will jar you. - Okay. - So watch it in English. - Okay. - And it's worth it. - Okay. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's worth it. And so basically it follows this lady called Mizu.

who is the blue eye samurai. And basically the story is, is it's set in like olden time Japan in a time where the Shogun of Japan has like closed their borders. Okay. And it's like, no one is coming in. So everyone in this entire country is Japanese. So if you're white, black, anything else is illegal. You're dead.

You are not allowed to be in this country if you're not Japanese. Okay. So basically the way it follows is Mizu is mixed race. Interesting. So she's got blue eyes. So because she's got blue eyes and they call her a round eye, they call her like a round eye devil. Anyone mixed race, they're considered scum, like dirt. So she grew up, people dashing rocks at her head. She had to eat out of dumpsters, all these kinds of things, bro. She doesn't know who her dad is.

But she was hunted her whole life. And she knows that her mom was raped by one of the white guys. So she basically grew up being like... The whole story is about her wanting to kill. She knows for a fact at the time of her birth, there was only four white guys in the entire country. Okay. Only four white guys. So she's dedicated her entire life to dumping these breads. Okay. That's her entire mission. Okay. And back in those days...

It was illegal to touch a sword if you're a female. And so she had to pretend and to act on revenge. So they actually have like, revenge is like a part of their culture. You can't act on revenge if you're a female either. If shit happens to you, it just happens to you. That's your business. Only men can act on revenge. Bro, it's nuts. So she had to pretend her whole life that she was a boy. So everyone thinks she's a boy. And when I say she's fucking arms,

The fights in this bitch is graphic. Okay. Graphic fights and graphic sex. I'll swear. Bro, it's like...

Full frontal nudity. - Oh, swear. - Yes, bro. It's a good, good, good, good show. And I like what it does as well. It follows similar to The Last of Us. - Okay. - Where every episode is as long as it is. - Okay. - There might be an episode that's an hour. There might be an episode that's 40 minutes. There might be episodes that are an hour and 10. You get the episodes that you get, but they're timed the way they are timed because that's just this episode. - Okay. - Bro,

How many episodes in total? Eight episodes. Okay. Wow, bro. Okay. Wow. It's a fucking good show. There's quite a few things coming out on either coming out already out on Netflix that are just very juicy. Yeah. So yeah, I would, I would definitely recommend Blue Eyes Samurai. Do you know what else is back? I don't know if you might remember. This was the first season came out three years ago. A Chinese anime called Fog Hill of the Five Elements.

I spoke about it. Yeah. I found it. Where have you been watching it? Nine anime. Yeah. Nine anime. I need to watch it on there. Season two drops earlier this year. Okay. I've seen the first two episodes. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I stay watching clips of that. They don't miss with the arms. All right. That's beautiful to watch. Oh, all right. Nine anime. I'll watch it on there. Yeah, man. Yeah. But yeah, fantastic. I'm, I'm,

15 minutes from the end of the last episode. Say less. Sensational. I've also had another recommendation. I've not watched myself, but I've heard it's really good. Again, not on any streaming. You have to 9animate it for now. It's called Magna Crimson. I think I've heard of that. Magna Crimson. Yeah, I've heard. M-A-G-N-A Crimson.

I've heard that's, that's Arms House 2. So yeah. Oh, Ragnar, sorry. Ragnar Crimson. Ragnar Crimson, yeah. I bet. I've heard that's Arms House 2. So that's added to my list too. Sick, sick, sick, sick, sick. I'm excited. I love anime coming my way. Yeah, man. So I started watching one on Netflix called Vampire in the Garden. Vampire in the Garden?

I'm sure it's Vampire in the Garden. Yeah. Again, I've seen a couple episodes. It's just a light watch, but I like the animation. I like the fights too. All right, fair play. Let's add it to the list. Okay, cool. Right. You said you had a question for us, yeah?

- I did have a question. So I don't know if you man, but it was all over social. So you may have seen it. Obviously JLS are doing like a quick girl renaissance. - Oh God. - And you saw, I don't know what, I don't know what your question is, but I would run off the stage. That's my answer. I'd run off the stage. - I know what you're gonna say. - Yeah, I'd run off the stage. - So my question to you is if I try to do a stunt like that on our next tour, for example, what would you do?

That is my question. - I'll scream stand up at the top of my lungs. The top, top, top, as much decibel as these speakers can handle is what they will receive from me saying, "Stand the fuck up. What are you doing? What are you doing?" - I'm just doing like an intro, walking in, I'm trying to hype the crowd. - And you just lost yourself and turned your back and landed flat on your back. - His back literally flipped. It bounced, bro.

I couldn't carry on the way they carried on. That's one thing that I will always be grateful for that are like a lot of our shit is always improv. If that did happen to you, I'm allowed to address it and say, what the fuck are you doing? As opposed to these guys. They were in the routine, they were in the song, everything, yeah. Also, he was lucky. One of the boys is lucky. The Brer who is about to intro after this

This one? He's lucky that Donnie fucked his backflip to take the terrible timing off his spin. Watch this away. What is that? - Oh yeah. - Oh bro. - Man said, don't worry I got you. - Yeah. I'm not gonna lie, rate the recovery. - 'Cause my back would have been in agony. - I would forget. Play the whole thing for me again. These men have no shame with these introductions as well. Watch this. Bah, bah, bah, and still talk. That's awful.

- Man thought this was 2001. - What's Doddy's name again? - I don't know any other names. - Aston. - Aston. - Yeah. - Shameful. It's not even shameful behavior 'cause that's just what he does. - Yeah, it's not shameful. Like he would have done that in rehearsal a million times. Like the man had been performing, bless him, like, you know, obviously. - Yeah, that's peak. - It's just unfortunate. - Yeah, if you did that, yeah, my answer was I'll scream to the top of my lungs. Stand up.

and just continue with the show? - Yeah, apologize to these paying people. Apologize to them and let's get on with what we rehearsed. - Fair. - Remember yourself. - Fair, fair, fair. I can't ask for anything more or less, fair man.

Oh my God. All right. You said you had a couple tweets for us to finish. Just a couple tweets to wrap this dance up. My friend lied on his CV that he mastered the piano at 15. And now he's been asked if he can play for the board of directors on Friday. Reply. Himself replying. Man has been sitting in the car for the past half an hour Googling the most painless way to break all your fingers. Wow.

Wow. I couldn't receive that email saying, come play in front of the board of directors on Friday. I'll say no. I'll just actively say no. The most painless way to break all your fingers. That's crazy. Also, you can just break one. Fact. Just break one. Fact. Or just lie and say you broke one. That's hilarious. Oh my God. I saw a strip club across the street from a mini golf place and I'm a liberal, but that's too much for me.

What if you're just trying to enjoy a nice afternoon with your family, then your kids look across the street and see a bunch of losers play mini golf? That's funny. That's clever and funny. Well played. If you shoot your shot and miss, why do you unfollow? You have no sportsmanship and I don't like it. Reply. Do you chill in the break room after you don't get the job? Reply. You standing outside the club if they don't let you in? Facts! Facts!

Wow, that's literally, and some people do. And they do, and they beg and they plead. Wow, God. My ex could speak four languages. English, nonsense, lies, and uselessness. Defining uselessness as a language is the biggest piss take I've ever heard. I'll reconnect. If I saw that tweet, I'll message her and reconnect. Reconnect. Uselessness.

People think I'm hilarious, which is interesting because 96% of the time I'm not joking. Imagine. So this is the last one I got. Now I'm sneaky because my password's in Spanish. Spanish? Fam? Yeah. If... Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. If someone... Yeah, if my partner said, oh, what's your password real quick? And it was in a different language...

I know that eye contact will make me sweat. - Yeah. - I know that eye contact will make me sweat. - Wow. - Different language. - You're hiding everything. - You're not even giving me a chance. You're not even playing fair. - I'm sneaky 'cause this is Spanish.

Wow. Okay, fair. Fair play, fair play, fair play. Yes, sir. That was a little nice, nice light finish. Wow. What's going on today, bro? Satin's not. A disconnect. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a disconnect. I don't know if it's like a sleep ting or, um, I don't know. Also, random, I spoke to you, man, about it the other day. I'm trying to get into this skincare game. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh,

This is not cheap. - Yeah. - This is not cheap. - Yeah. - Bro, I've got some, one of our friends recommended me a- - A plethora. - Yeah. That's the third time you said it today. All right, chill out.

- It literally is the first time you said plethora. - Today? - Today. - That's the first time I've acknowledged it. I'm not gonna lie to you. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. Run it back in the, obviously when you watch it back. - Someone got a word of the day dictionary. Anyway. - Is that why you pointed at me? - 'Cause I knew you were gonna say plethora. - I swear. - Yeah. - I didn't realize he knew you were gonna say it. - Yeah, he pointed at me 'cause it just came to mind. - Yeah, 'cause you said it three times today. - I saved my bad, bro.

I just say words and forget about it. - It was in context. - It was in context, bro. So that's why I said, yeah, that's your team today. - Say what the fuck you wanna say, man. Talk about your fucking skin. - So obviously,

It's not every day your boy gets a good sleep. So I reached out to one of our bros who's up on their skin game. And she said, Beck, get this, this, this, this. Look at some avocado cream thing for under the eyes. A couple of face maskies, de-puffs. Plus I've already got, I bought some new beard stuff the other day. And I also just bought two like fucking toner and a new moisturizer. This bitch is...

Fresh. Okay. Doesn't look it today. Again, not the best sleep. Fever, sweats, the lot. Anyway. Do you know how much this bitch costs? Bro, this avocado cream, yeah? It cost me 30 pounds. Pfft.

It's this big. - Yeah, I was gonna say, it's a little tub. - Is that for under-eating? - Yeah. - It's a little tub. - You man, it's this fucking big. They gave it to me in a box like this. I was gassed. I popped that bitch open and it had the- - The floss. - The long stone. - I went like this. It was this. - Pissed it. - I was like, you're mugging me. I messaged her immediately. I said, is this a joke? Are you in on this? Are you in on this? This is a joke.

- Nah. - Yeah, that cost me 30 quid. The little eye maskies were like 85 pound for a pack of eight. Bro. - Yeah. - My toner drawings, my toner was like 15 pound and the cream on top of it was like 15 pound. - Damn man. - So just to look peng is, and that's not even including trims bro. - Yeah. - Trim, and my trim was like 50 quid a pop. To look a little piece handsome. - Yeah, it's expenny. - It is expenny. - Game's the game though.

Game is the game is the game is game. No one forced me to do it. And now that you've just said, sometimes when you say the game is the game, not just you, but like sometimes when someone says the game is the game, it makes you feel like I just wasted five minutes of everyone's time. Do you know what I mean? - No, no, no, 'cause you're bringing it to light. - Yeah, you're bringing it to light, but it's fair. - I'm not trying to discredit everything you say. - Yeah, no, but sometimes it makes me feel that way. No, I'm joking, it doesn't. But it does make me realize like,

The game is the game. The game is the game. What are you crying about? No one forced you. The game is the game. Literally no one forced you. EA Sports, man. EA Sports, bro. Lecoq Sportive. Come on. Anyway, guys, we're wrapping it. Patreon.com. All slash. Shits and gigs. Three Panama. 10p a day. Run the P. S&G. Love of love. Gang of gang. Selling a little or a lot.

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