cover of episode STRANGE ADDICTIONS?! | EP 435

STRANGE ADDICTIONS?! | EP 435

2024/10/14
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ShxtsNGigs

Chapters

The hosts discuss various non-addictive habits they are addicted to, ranging from singing in the car to cracking joints.
  • Singing lyrics in the car as if performing for someone.
  • Cracking joints for a satisfying sensation.
  • Using cotton buds in ears for an orgasmic feeling.

Shownotes Transcript

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- Guys, girls. - Yep. - We are back in this biz night. It's a Monday, it's a fun day, it's a great day. - Well, good intro, good. - Oh, you flopped it there. - Yeah, I bottled it. - You bottled the whole thing. Anyway, as you know, we go straight into the nitty-gritty and we go to the question of the week. And this week's question was,

What are you addicted to that's not an addiction? - I liked this one. - I want you guys to answer for me as well. - What am I addicted to that's not an addiction? - What's not an addiction? - Ooh, ah, bah, bah. - So I've got mine. - What am I addicted to that's not an addiction? - You can't say White Monster. - No, 'cause that is an addiction. - To you. - Fair. What am I addicted to that's not an addiction?

- I can say some stuff, but I'm gonna, yeah. - Peach. - Peach? - No, peach. - Oh, PG. - You're gonna keep it peach, yeah. - I thought you said peach. - Nah, nah, nah. - That's a fact. - Yeah. - What am I addicted to that's not an addiction? I'm addicted to singing lyrics in my car like I'm singing them to someone. - On the M? - Yeah, bro. I get in my feelings, yeah. I start reminiscing, yeah. Bro. - Yeah.

- Fuck, I'm a hundred percent addicted to it. I'll punch the fucking dashboard bro. - Dashboard, yeah. Okay, what about you guys? - I would say it's a random one, like cotton buds in ears.

- Orgasmic. - It's ridiculous. - Yeah. - I remember when we went America and Jacob like bought a box of them and he was like, this is me all night. - Yeah. - I was like, what do you mean? And he was like, I'm gonna curl my toes in my bed. - Yeah, the rest of us are wanking. He's cleaning his ears. - He's cleaning his ears and just having the same sensation. - Bro, it feels too juicy. And the doctor would tell you, don't do it. - Yeah, don't do it. - But it's bad. - It's so good. - It feels too good. - My addiction that's not an addiction is cracking on my joints.

Oh yeah, 100%. My back can get it. Pause. Yo. Yo. My back can get it. Yeah, I crack everything. Oh yeah, 100%. And it just feels amazing. Yeah. That is my addiction. I have an addiction that's not an addiction, which is like, I do...

the most soft stretch in the gym every time and it feels good. I didn't do it with you yesterday. - Which one is it? Like the downward dog back stretch? - It's like, I don't know how to explain it, but basically you're on all fours, yeah? And then you, oh, they're called cat cows. - Cat cows, yeah, I do that all the time. - The cow? - Yeah. - You're moving. - You're moving for real. - You're howling at the moon.

- You get that, the way my spine on this over thing here, that bountiful hill. When I get that, I'm like, God damn. And then when I, and I feel my pelvis go from here, all the way to, it's a different dimension. And I think, bro, this is mental. And if anyone can see me, 'cause you have to move your neck with it as well. I'm waiting for someone to just

- Yeah, yeah. - Wipe you. - Yeah, wipe me and I'll never do that stretch again. But I'm addicted to it. - It's the best stretch. - It's an unbelievable stretch. I think I'm addicted to many a thing. Yeah, but we can go all day. - We could go all day. Anyway, guys, girls. - Sex! - It's okay. - Are you?

Guys, girls, write in the comments below. What is an addiction that you are not addicted to? I wanna see some juicy ones in the comments. Right. First one, me to a T or used to be me to a T. I'm trying to change. Go on. What's an addiction that's not an addiction? Procrastination. Listen to me. Procrastination. I've been trying to not be a procrastinator. I'm finding my Achilles heel is letters or emails that require me to pick up the phone.

To sort out. Okay. If someone, if I've received a letter, if I've received a letter or an email from,

that requires me to pick up the phone and call someone it's never getting done yeah and i put it on my to-do list i move it to my next to-do list every single day it's never getting done it's my number one procrastination i just can't stop it's jeremy i hear you yeah how are you getting on with your um by the way this is not even a funny question of the week this is like a good one yeah i read all the ones i was like oh okay oh um how are you getting on with this procrastination journey

- It's gotten a lot better. I think, especially because I'm getting used to, like I said on Patreon, three pound Montemide, make sure you go on that. - She's in case for slash, no, I'm patron for slash, come on. - I said up and down the stairs, up and down stairs. So when I want to get shit done, I know I have to go downstairs, go upstairs, I go to the top floor. And I'm just so used to it now that it's not even procrastination, it's just second nature.

Yeah, once you're downstairs, you're not not going to do the thing. Exactly. Yeah. Because it's not like I lived in an apartment. I can just go from there to there. I have to go all the way back upstairs. So I'm going to get all the shit I need to get done before I go upstairs. Very nice. So yeah, man, procrastination levels are very low at the moment. Good, bro. I'm glad. Right. Something you're addicted to that's not an addiction. This is me to a T as well. Screaming ouch in anticipation of getting hurt.

- Yeah, 100%, 100%. - Really? - Yeah, I can knock my knee on here and I'm like, ah! I'm not gonna feel anything. I'm not gonna feel a thing. I'll scream. - I hear you, I hear you, I hear you. And then you just wait for that pain to add the combo. - Yeah, you just wait. - I hear you. What's an addiction? What are you addicted to that's not an addiction? Banging my wife's sister every other Saturday. - I wasn't expecting that. - Neither was I. - Every other Saturday. That's, okay, right.

Let me tread lightly. That's obviously jail worthy. Yeah. First of all, how did we figure out the routine of every other Saturday? Like say it's shared custody. Yeah. Crazy. Yeah. And secondly, I'm vexed because I'm just playing devil's advocate. He's looking forward to every other Saturday. He is. And it's just infrequent enough for you to count down the days. Yes. Every two weeks. Every two weeks. Yeah. Nah, bro. Yeah. They're not sublime.

It's just long enough that you're not, there's never going to be a time where you're not going for it. Yeah. As soon as you link her. Yeah. But also just go pen. My wife's sister. That's dangerous. Yeah, it's too, it's ridiculous, bro. We don't go down. Facts. FYI. Right. Addicted to, what you did to is not an addiction. Yeah.

Flirting crazy with shorties, knowing full well I do not intend to follow up with anything I just said. - Yeah. Been there. - Oh, I've been there. - Been there. Been there. Been there. Been on the receiving end too. Been on the receiving end too. - I've been on the receiving end a million times more than I've conducted. Conductor. Conductor. - You ever tell him I'm a brother though?

- Bro, listen to me. I've said some shit to girls that I have no intention of following up on. - Especially when I'm John Tizzle. - Yeah, when I'm Blosky Osky. - I will say some stuff to you. - Yeah, bro. It's not even fair. It's not even funny. - Because when they've reciprocated and you're like,

And let's say you've knotted and you're just like, why did I even bother? Now I have to somewhat follow up or just dead it and that fucks me up for the next time. - Yeah bro, 100% because like my thing is, is that Morning Handsome, Morning Handsome hits me like a PNC. If I've been spitting bars on you the night before,

And then I've had a wank and gone to sleep. By the time I wake up the next day to this morning handsome text, I'm like, what the fuck, man? Who are you to me? Yeah, but I wasn't serious. I wasn't serious. I was just making up stuff in my head. Can't you tell? It's 11 p.m. Yeah, bro. Can't you tell? Stop, man. Morning handsome. Yeah. It's peak. Yeah, it's peak. Being on both sides, man. Yeah, being on both sides. Realising that you're on the receiving end is actually the worst, most heartbreaking. It's peak.

Yeah, you're flirting with me because you're bored. Yeah, it's unfollow worthy. Yeah, I'm also, I'm so immature. I double up on my immaturity, which makes me pretend to be mature. Okay. So I'm so immature that I can't let you know that I care enough to unfollow you.

Which seems like I'm mature because it seems like I'm just following you anywhere moving on. But really, I'm so immature that I can't let you know that it bothered me enough for me to click that unfollow button. I hear you. I hear you. All right. What are you addicted to? That's not an addiction. This used to be me, religiously. Doing a weekly shop, then opening up delivery every day for the next five days. Oh, last? Okay, I've been much better on it this year. Last year, you might want to know how many chickens lost their lives pointlessly.

I'm being deadly serious. I'm not proud of it. Chickens last year lost their lives. - You ran through them. - Pointlessly. I dashed so much rotten chicken away from my weekly shops. - Damn. - They died in vain, you man. - Damn. - I was wasting food last year. Healthy shop, fridge looking banging. - Oh yeah. - Yeah, close that fridge, order side, Uber Eats now. - Facts, 'cause I'm not cooking. - I want Mexican. - And I'm not cooking that.

I got a patient. - There's no way. There's no barbacoa? Are you insane? That takes days. - I can't do that on the fly. - I want Mexican now. What's all this? - Oh, that's hilarious. - Yeah, bro. Oh, bro. And I also don't have the fresh coriander. - Yeah, facts. - And I'm not going back to the shop. - You're only gonna have fresh coriander once anyway. - Yeah, facts. - Waste of money. - Yeah, fresh herbs is another thing. I should start.

I should start growing my own herbs. I'm never going to just, I'm just throwing stuff out and see what sticks. I should, because I made a few pasta dishes last week and was using parsley, right? And I realized I made it. No, I made a pasta dish and a risotto. Both of them I put parsley in and I realized, wow, this is the first time in my life where I've bought a packet of fresh herbs and used it twice. I, the one I would use the most,

or I would sometimes always finish is rosemary. - I was gonna say rosemary. - Yeah. - I was gonna cut you off and say rosemary. - For steak always. - Yeah, rosemary. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, rosemary 'cause you can do it in steak, you can do it with potatoes, you can do it in like a braise, like stew, whatever, rosemary slaps. - Rosemary slaps, yeah. - Rosemary, yeah, actually outside of rosemary, I've only ever done it once. - I actually, so for context, my garden has a- - Here we go. - I love talking about the house.

- My garden has like an L-shape like, what's like a- - Mud? - Mud, yeah, but it's raised. - Yeah, yeah, I know what you mean. L-shaped mud, that's raised. - It's got wood next to it. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. So your boy might start planting shit. - Yeah, and foraging. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Because this herb thing makes sense. - It does, bro. - It honestly makes,

I need to get a gardener to sort it out first and then start applying pressure to it afterwards. 'Cause yeah, fresh earth makes sense. - Yeah, my house will turn to weeds. I'm not even gonna bother, L-shape or no. - Yeah. - 'Cause at the back of my- - I've seen your garden. - Yeah. - It's a lot. There's stuff happening in your garden. Yeah.

- There's a lot happening in your garden. - I'll lose it. - Yeah, you will. - Bro, I'll lose it in the roses and shit. - There's a lot happening in your garden. - There's flowers. Whoever lived there before me planted flowers at us. - Yes, they did. - Fucking hell. There's shit in my garden. Right, this is also me, right? What are you addicted to that's not an addiction?

Turning the water up hot enough in the shower that it almost hurts and ends up feeling like it's scratching an itch that I didn't know I had. It's bad for my skin, but I can't help it. It almost hurts. It just almost hurts. A female wrote that in it. No, a guy. Really? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Girls love hot showers. They love hellfire showers. Yeah, unbearably hot showers. I'm building a tolerance to it because I need to get my nan around to fix it. My shower's stuck on hot in a minute. Oh, mad. Okay. Like too hot.

- Yeah, it's not sanitary. It's not safe. - 'Cause you're not in there long enough to clean. - God forbid you have to wash your ass off in that bitch. That skin's too scentsy. It's too scentsy, you man. So when I wanna, I'm freeing it all up for you man today, I'm sorry. God forbid you have to wash your ass off in this. And it's not even an if, it's when. - Yeah, facts, yeah. - It's when. Bro, my, my,

my scrotail and my body, they burn in the shower. So basically I go in there and I give it one of them and I'm like, fuck that's hot. - Literally test the words. - And then I'm too scared to take my hand all the way out. So I put my hand in once I can tolerate with my hand, I slide in, yeah? And then I let it hit my back of my neck and I sit there like, and then I'm like, okay, cool, I can bear it. It's just about, and then we lather up

scrubby, scrubby, scrub, scrub, scrub, scrub, scrub. Obviously scrub my legs, scrub my balls, scrub everything. And then you scrub your body. And then I let it all rinse. And now I need to get in the crevices. And I'm thinking this is gonna burn.

This is gonna burn now. - Yeah. - So yeah. You might know what happens next. I spread and I scream. That's what happens. I spread and scream, bro. Moving on to the next addiction. I spread and I scream every day. And I can't, again, life admin, can't be bothered to call homeboy.

Can't be bothered. So I just burn every day. Sorry, bro. All right. What are you addicted to? That's not an addiction. Toxic, medium, ugly, unavailable men. Unavailable is the key. Medium, ugly, unavailable. Yeah. And toxic. And toxic. Do better fight back, man. What are you doing? They can't help themselves. Okay. How can you not help yourself with that? I don't have those answers. I don't have those answers. It's a trauma ting, clearly. That is a trauma ting.

Wait Toxic Toxic Medium Ugly Unavailable men Yeah That's what you're addicted to That's any guy in Westfield That's just like a normal That's a normal Brett It could be Stratford or White City Yeah bro Stratford White City bro What Like Brent Cross Yeah We're talking about shopping mall niggas Yeah Like this is just a guy Wow Yeah yeah That's poor Paul Yeah yeah And he's counting his lucky stars Yeah he is You're addicted to man

I'm toxic and unavailable and I'm not even paying. - Don't tell me stuff like that. - Yeah, and you're addicted to that. - If I'm that caliber, I'll take advantage. - Yeah, facts bro, 'cause I'm ugly anyway. I haven't got a choice but to take advantage. 'Cause I'm not getting anything else. - Fucking hell. - Wow, okay. What you're addicted to is not an addiction. Saying, don't provoke me to anger to any minor inconvenience or disagreement. - Double down. Saying I want to kill myself after every minor inconvenience. - That's me. - I know that's you. - That's me.

Wow, that is actually me. Don't provoke me to anger. Bro, I want to kill myself. I...

I really need to stop saying that. Yeah, you do. That's one thing I'm addicted to. Okay. Charging anything to stairs. Yeah. Anything. Yeah. Like anything that's remotely uncomfortable or just embarrassing or it's just, bro, I don't want to live anymore. Stairs. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Stairs seems fine, bro. Overanalyzing text responses from girls I like. Okay. She said LOL, but there's no emoji. Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

I can kind of hear what you're saying as well, you know. Oh, 100%, bro. Yeah. If I text you again to the morning thing, if I say, good morning, beautiful, and you reply, morning? My day's ruined, bro. My day's ruined. You better hope I'm not filming today. Because you men are going to see me distracted in my own head. Yeah. Reply. Yeah. I'll go on WhatsApp just to see if you're online. Morning. Morning. Bro, you're killing me. No kiss, nothing. Just morning. Morning.

- That's tough. - Say you don't love me anymore. - That's tough. - Yeah. - You were her quick before she, yeah, yeah. - Yeah. - She used you. - Mourning is nuts. - She used you. - Yeah, bro. - Sorry, bro. - I analyze things like that. - What are you addicted to? That's not an addiction. The downfall of my enemies. The downfall of my enemies. - Right, I need to understand, you're Nigerian. - Yes, I am Nigerian. - Yeah, so you've heard this enemies chat for a long time.

Like I'll go as far as to say probably all your life. - Yeah. - Who are they? - It's nobody. Let me not lie, there are no enemies north, south, east or west. - Yeah, I swear. - People just say stuff. - Yeah, just enemies. - An enemy is again, a minor inconvenience to op. That's all an enemy is. - At any point do we, 'cause obviously we're still waiting for our 23andMe. I might need to take on this. - Yeah, this enemy. - This enemy vernacular. - Enemy chat, yes, yes.

At any point do I decide someone is an enemy? I'm gonna get into this. - At any given time of the day you can. - So it's okay, so.

Let me just understand this. - Right, for context, go on, go on. - No, go on. - Go on, right now Mercedes are my enemies. - Oh, okay, so we do put a face to the enemy at certain points. - Yes, we do. - And how long are they enemies for? - Until the issue's resolved. - As soon as it's resolved? - As soon as we, ah. - 'Cause they've been inconvenienced in you. - They're my enemies right now. - Yeah. - Yeah, they're my enemies right now. - Yeah. So, okay, sorry, just clear my head for a second. Right, I just wanna put this all out in the open. - Okay. - 'Cause again, I might need it. - Okay.

- So I'm saying my enemies are against me. At this point, I'm not thinking Mercedes. I'm not thinking Rem who's off again. Shade. I'm joking. I'm just thinking enemies. - Enemies. - Faceless enemies who want my downfall. And I'm just assuming they're out there because I'm living my best life. So there must be enemies.

AKA haters. Right. And then when I'm experiencing any inconvenience of any kind, you are actually... The enemy. You're the face of my enemy right now. Correct. I see. Correct. And at any point do I... Is it okay for me to any point to say you're my enemy? Um...

- I don't think you call your enemy the enemy. - Okay. - You talk to a third party about your enemy. - About your enemy. Okay, they'll never know that they're my enemy. - Exactly. - Apart from my aura. - Exactly. - Ah, okay, cool. - Yeah. - Nice. - You're not saying that every day guys. - Cool. Right, last one for me. - All right, go. - What's an addiction? What you're addicted to is not an addiction. Taking my phone to the bathroom. - Facts. - Okay, now hear me out. This is my...

everest yeah facts it's it's boring without you oh bro i don't even can i again yeah can i say stuff free space bro i'm gonna say this and i'm gonna say it with chest i'm gonna try i'm i'm open to scrutiny okay this is how bad my phone in the bathroom addiction is at least 33 percent of the time no that's a lot at least 25 percent of the time i'll piss sitting down if i have the time

just so I can go on my phone in the bathroom. - Interesting. - And if shit happens. - Literally. - Hey, it just happens. - It happens, yeah. - But I didn't go in there for that. But if I've got time, 25%, one out of four, if I've got bare time, and one out of four seems a lot, maybe 20%. One out of five, yeah, that sounds appropriate. I'll sit down, bro. - Interesting. - Play a game of chess. - Okay, fair play. - See what TikTok's saying, man. - Fair play. - I'm in there for a minute because I just want silence and seclusion. - Yeah, your own bubble.

Bro, God forbid they put me in pen with a phone. I'll commit crimes inside. I'll commit crimes so I can stay in there. Bro, God forbid they put me in a cell with a phone. I'm chilling in there. It is really, really, really an addiction. Fair play. I hear it though. I do hear it. It's one of those ones where, like you said, peace of mind, your own space and...

You just have that time. Like you feel like you've got a time constraint, but you also don't because you make your own rules. On the toilet, you make your own rules. Even if you're done, you don't have to get up. Yeah. I told you the time that my ex was banging on the door one time, innit? This is when we were playing Clash of Clans. She banged on the door. She was like, I know you're in there to get away from me. When I say bro, my penis went inside my body. She's banging on the door. I said, I know you're in there to get away from me.

- I can't hear that. - Yeah, she's in, you're in there for half an hour every time. - I couldn't hear that. Like, are we not in a marital relationship or not? I can't hear that. - I know you're in there to get away from me. And I was thinking facts, bro, because we're at war. - Yeah, literally. - We're at war and I need- - Space. - I need solitude, I need silence. I need space. I can't have you chatting to me. - I've got nothing to do with you. - I need privacy.

Bro, yeah, it was damn. And then, but I think where the addiction really started was when I told you, man, when I was working in the office, I would just go for toilet breaks. Yes, yes, yes. So that's where it started. That was me in Deloitte. Yeah, I remember you said. You might know I hated that shit. Yeah, I would find any excuse to go to the toilet and I would park my keister on there. I'd be in there for half an hour easily.

I'm reading it for half an hour until my back started to hurt. Until my feet were numb. - Tingling. - Yeah, until I got pins and needles in my feet, I'll be sat on that bitch. - Tingling, yeah, yeah. - Oh my God. Yeah, damn man, that was a dark time. Fuck, it was dark, bro. - Fucking hell, yeah. - Right, that's my last one. - All right, I've got a few more. What are you addicted to that's not an addiction?

Licking Pringles before I eat them. - Okay. - Butters. Pissing in sinks anytime and anyones. - Anyones?

- Wow. - Yeah. Wow is, there's nothing to say about that. - I've pissed in the sink before. - I've pissed in the sink bare times. - Have I? - What do you mean bare times? - I've pissed in the sink bare times. Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. What do you mean bare times? - I've pissed in the sink bare times. - Why? - There are times like post-coitus, I won't shower. I would like wash my, I would wash my delicacies in the sink. - And just piss in there? - And just piss in there if I needed. - That's bad.

- Yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Rags. - Rags. - No, it's not rags. - There's a toilet there. - It's rags to me. It's rags to me. - What you're doing in terms of confidence is attractive. Not in, not what you're saying it. The way you're saying it and you're not even breaking character and you're just saying it because you're bearing it all to the world. That's an attractive trait. Stop it.

Stop pissing in sinks. Post-coit, there's a toilet right there. Sometimes I do it, bro. You said bare times. That really shocked me. I've done it bare times, yes. I have done it bare times.

- Yeah. - Damn! I'm really surprised. - The thing is, I don't have an excuse. - I can see that. - I genuinely don't have an excuse, but I'm there, my cock's already out. - Yeah, and don't get me wrong, I understand your tool is literally in the thing. - It's literally there. - Yeah, but no. - I know, man. - You shouldn't be pissing in there. - Yeah, mine are in it. - Because people wash their face in there. - Yeah, but the splashback is gone, bro. - What's gone? We don't know what's gone. - Also very true, but hey.

People take golden showers, they're fine. Yeah, that's consensual, bro. I'm saying if I want to use your toilet and I wake up, if I sleep over at your house and I wake up and I want to wash my face in a basin, I don't want to think, is there piss residue in here? It would never be the sink I use. You don't know that. I do know that. What do you mean it would never be the sink you use? Because you use another sink.

- Okay, well what if you happen to live, like take your wallet out your head for a second. You're back living in an apartment, one bathroom. Now what? - I guess we'll never know. I guess we'll never know. - Oh God. All right, fair play. - Yeah, I'll do one more. What are you addicted to that's not an addiction? Waxing. I love feeling how smooth my pussy is afterwards. - Oh my God. - Don't we all?

Don't we all? A freshly waxed tongue? There's actually not a thing like it. You salivate immediately. It's like brioche. It's soft like brioche. It's mental. It's mental, bro. You have to eat it.

Because you know, for some reason, it doesn't make sense, but it's sweeter today. It's sweeter than it was yesterday. It's fucking insane. It's not sour though, bro. It's brioche. It's soft, bro. It's warm. It's edible, bro. Tasty. Yeah. Oh, God. That's my weakness, you man. Wow, that's hilarious. Waxed, Tom, that day or the day before? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

- When you go against the grain as well and it's still fresh. - Yes. - That's my test. That's my test. If you got trousers on, I'll go under there and I'll do this.

I'll go 90% down on just a quick, just like, just so I can double check. There's no grains in there. Against the grain and it's still smooth. Yeah, bro. Oh, that's when you're, wow. Yeah. That will send you different. That's too funny. Yeah. Facts. Anyway, guys, girls, thank you for hanging around with us for this long. Welcome to the show. Welcome to the show. Right, guys. So you already know the drill. You already know the...

the jargons that we say, but we really, really mean it when we say we work really, really, really hard

to create an amazing community over on Patreon. Fun fact, I don't think you saw it. We actually got an email from the CEO of Patreon the other day. Just to say hi James, if you had. Love what you're doing. Keep smashing it. - Oh, sexy stuff. - Good job. - Very sexy. - Sexy stuff. - Very sexy, bro. - I like him, he's cool. He has his own podcast and stuff. - Oh, is it? - Yeah, he's very like, interviews a lot of filmmakers and stuff like that. He's cool, man. - Fair play. - He's a cool guy. - The CEO of Patreon? - Yeah, yeah. - Oh, heavy. - It's called Digital Spaghetti.

Fair play Ellis, come on with the plug. - Yeah, he's cool man. - All right, sick. Yeah, man. So there you go guys. From the literally from the horse's mouth. Our Patreon is where it's at. So head on over right now to patreon.com/shitsandgigs. It's gonna cost you literally nothing or three pounds a month. - 10p a day. - Run the P. - S and G. - And please enjoy bonus episodes that we put on there every Thursday. Please enjoy one of a kind log cabin episodes where we take on adventures. We take on,

Just really brotherly love, fun shit to do that you would never see on a podcast. So anytime you want to see us do interesting things, anytime where we've said, oh, you know what? You'll be sick if we did this thing. We try our best to get it done on the log cabin. So head on over there, patreon.com, four slash shits and gigs. Please enjoy.

Without any further ado. - Talk to me. - Fouad and I have an announcement. - Do we? - Yeah. - Talk to me. - Oh, we do. - Okay. - We do. - Fouad and I went to the gym yesterday. - Mm-hmm. - Yeah. - Together. - We mentioned it last week. - Like men, brothers in arms. And yeah, we mentioned that we were signing up last week and we did sign up. - We did. - And we went to the gym yesterday. Now, I don't like doing free promo. - Yeah. - Yeah? I don't like doing free promo, yeah? - Yeah.

but TikTok was not lying when they said third space is legit. - Trois space. - Yeah. - Trois space. - Trois space. - Trois space. - Bro. - Yeah.

It is lit in there. Bro, it's fucking sick. So we went to one of the bigger ones. I'm not gonna debate which one we went to. We went to there. And when I say, Ellis, we trained. We trained. My tits are on fire till now, bro. We trained in there. And they have everything. Every equipment you want. Bro.

Each area of the gym is like you're walking into a different gym. They've got like a CrossFit area that makes you think like you're actually walking into a CrossFit box. They've got a normal gym area, which is like the best version of what you've seen. I've seen they've got some physio area. They've got the weightlifting area, which is the zone room. And they just got racks and racks and racks for days. Gymnastics area, calisthenics. Bro, calisthenics area, bro. They got all sorts in there. It's heavy in there, man. It was a playground and they've got towels galore. Yeah. Bro, I showered with two. Yeah.

I had a whole towel just for my feet. Just for the feet, man. Yeah, it was nuts in there. We trained like crazy and then we had healthy shakes afterwards. We did. And what's mad to me is there's some physiques in there, Ellis. Mm-hmm.

Bro. - There's some humans in there. - There's some humans in there. We randomly, I didn't even clock it. We were on the treadmill afterwards. We were next to the bray from what's it called? Slow Horses. - Slow Horses, yeah. - The black guy. - The gambler. - Yeah, randomly jacked. - Yeah, wedged. - Randomly jacked. - Yeah, he's wedged. - And I'm thinking he has no incentive for his roles. He has no incentive. These times, that is trying to be an international sex symbol.

He's one. I don't know, so what am I doing then? What am I doing then? - Yeah. - So yeah, Third Space is where it's at. We're gonna, bro, we're gonna be in there. So if you see us in Third Space just sweating and shit. - Just know we're on job. - Yeah. Say hi from a distance. - Yeah. - 'Cause our aura's gonna be pressurized. - Yeah, you're gonna crumble across that then. - Say hi from a distance. - Yeah, you're gonna crumble. - 'Cause we're gonna be there like.

Yeah. One more. Yeah, man. One more rep. Yeah, bro. Fucking hell. Yeah, we lifted in there. We did. That's a gymnasium. That's a gymnasium. If there's anything that's going to get me back on the horse, it's this fucking space. Bro, if there's anything that's going to get me back on the horse, right now it's third space because they have...

Healthy meals. I can't speak on their deliciousness as of yet. - Yeah. - Because ain't tried it, but I'm going to, and I'm gonna be in there all the time. And we have to record super late today. And I'm really, really, really upset that we're not gonna be able to go today. - Yeah, I brought my gym kit and everything so. - I know you did. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Tomorrow? - Lecoq Sportif, yeah tomorrow for sure. - 100? - 100. We've only got one episode to do tomorrow.

- Tomorrow. - Yeah, I'm down, of course. Yeah, it's gonna be juicy. I'm gonna be sore. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm gonna be real sore. I might need a massage. - Why is metal getting me so gassed? - Bro! Wow, I'm excited, bro. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - And when I'm a bit more cinched, I'm gonna sweat in that sauna.

- Sauna's a bit too public for now. - For now, yeah. - But when daddy's got those calm gutters, you're gonna see me in that sauna sweating. Yeah, it's great. It really is great 'cause I'm not gonna lie, when we signed up, we went to one of the smaller things and I was like, ah. - It's okay. - It's all right. - Yeah, they're gassing it. - Yeah, they're definitely hyping it. Huh, this big boy we went to? Wowzers. Damn, I wanna go right now. I haven't been excited about the gym in a minute, you man. - Yeah, that's good. - When we trained yesterday,

I was sweating, bro. Same. Not even doing cardio. I don't sweat unless we do cardio. Yeah. I was sweating, bro. Good gym. It was good. Good gym, man. Fuck's sake, man. Yeah, man. Gassed. Anyway, you've got a dilemma for us. I do have a dilemma, guys. Dilemma. Tukey and I have three kids under 18. Tukey. That's what the name says. All right. I'm just clarifying. Yeah, Tukey. T-O-O-K-I-E.

"Two girls and my 17 year old son. "To be honest, I've been doing my own thing "for the bulk of our relationship. "I haven't been around, and when I was around, "we weren't stable as a couple. "My other women were vindictive "and would often expose our side relationships "to force Tukey and I apart." - For fuck's sake. I thought he was talking about previous relationships. He's talking about his sightings. - His sightings. - Right. - Last year, I got testicular cancer.

After 20 years of going back and forth, I asked Tukey to take me back, for good this time, and to marry me. She said she will talk to our kids about this. My son told me he has several father figures in his life and that I'm not needed. Him. I remember us struggling and you weren't there. We're good now. Everyone is in school and got good grades. I got a little job now. Mum is doing good. No disrespect, but we don't need your cancer in our lives.

to you had our teen son reject me mad this is a huge form of disrespect and i'm furious i brought that little nigga into this world why would she do this when i needed her the most how do i say yeah how do i bypass my own son to get my woman on my side help this is buttless bro so he's a

- He's a categorical cheat. - He's a categorical cheat. - He's not been around. - He's not been around. - He's got a teenage son. - Teenage son. - He caught a young cancer and then the son's like, bro, just bounce. - Just bounce, I don't need your cancer in our life. - Yeah, and he said, how do I move the teenage out of the way so Tukey can see sense? 'Cause I need her the most right now. Wow, what a sicko. - Narcissist. - Yeah, probably just died though, right?

- Probably bro, 'cause honestly you fucked up. There's no coming back. - Yeah. - There's no coming back unfortunately. - If you can get your health situation in order, maybe you can start making amends. Yeah, on a number one hero type ting. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - But yeah. - Until then. - Sounds like you've got a little dammy on your hands. - It's long. - Dabby, I should say. - A little dabby. - Yeah, you got a little dabby on your hands and you're gonna have to burn.

You're a little dabby in your hands and yeah, you're gonna have to burn bro. Cause you've been a neglectful father and he grew up strong. - So strong. So fucking strong. We're here now, yeah? - Yeah. - Okay, cool. So I'm, I think I'm up to date now. For those that are contextually, we're talking about My Hero Academia. I'm up to date now and it's annoying to me because I understand how huge this,

arc is but what's annoying me is every episode it switches to another huge thing in the main huge thing there's a lot going on there's so much going on that there's still not enough continuity for me to be gassed from one episode to the next yeah I think I'm understanding exactly what you said because I remember

because obviously this has been going on for a while now yeah and i remember i told you i watched nine episodes in one night i remember and they were still doing edinburgh yeah we're in edinburgh and we were still doing this hot bouncy bouncy i was here for it because i had i could just go next yeah next next i was able to remember everything that's going on so i was like gang gang gang oh my god oh my god but week after week trying to remember bro we might not see

Deku for four weeks. I've not seen him in ages. Yeah, so by the time they touch back at him, I can't remember what's going on. So that is really jarring. I will agree with you now. It's so jarring. It's super jarring, bro. There is a lot happening right now. I still stand by my statement a lot less than what I did like two months ago when I said MHA is shit. It's obviously gotten a lot better now because the arms is good and blah, blah, blah. But yeah, man, it's...

I want more continuity. I just need that to make it more interesting from episode to episode because I understand there's a lot happening, but I digress. I guess I am not the writer at the end of the day. I'm the consumer. So who am I? I hear it. Who am I? I hear it, man. More on, are you going to talk about more of this? No. More on anime. Remember I did say to you, Blue Lock might be back. Okay. It's back. Episode for episode? Episode one is back. I've not seen it, but I know it's back.

So we all assumed it was gonna be a movie, which they said to us was going to be a movie. - Ellis is stepping up on the keys today, damn. Bro, he's moving fast. - Yeah, so episode one is out. I've not seen it yet. Also Bleach is out. I've not seen it yet. - I've seen it. - What'd we say? Is it picking up from where it left off? - Yeah, I should have watched the last episode last time. - Oh, okay. - Because I couldn't remember basically

It was, yes, it's the paintbrush bear. But all I remember is from last time he finished with that rain, that Riasu rain thing that was bringing everyone back. And I think that, I don't think that was the, I don't think that was like the last episode, but that's also in my head with like Yoak or whatever, however you pronounce it. So like that was what was in my head for Bleach last time. And now...

we get back into this paintbrush thing. I'm thinking, paintbrush people was murking in from the start of this episode. So I was like, oh, okay. But I do remember bits and pieces of what's going on. - So it picks up exactly from where it left off, left off kind of thing. - Yeah, it's an eventful episode. - Okay.

I will. Thank you for letting me know. I will watch the tail end of season two again. Yeah. I don't think they should have made that. I think they should have made that the final season one. See this season, episode one should have been the final episode of last season because it's very impactful, but it's like, I don't want to ruin it. It's okay. I understand what you're trying to say though. I understand. Yeah. Yeah. I can see they're trying to,

show out, but also let's keep it moving. So big shit's happening and they're moving like say, it's not that big a deal. Do you know what I mean? - Okay. - There's like a big buildup of shit that you're like, oh fuck. And then it's like, cool, we're moving on by the way. And then it's done. And you're like, - Okay. - Yeah, and you're like, oh, okay. - Interesting. - Yeah, so yeah. I realize in as good as last season of Bleach was and stuff like that, I'm just not in love with Bleach anymore. - Why?

I'm just over it. I will continue to watch it, but it's just like, there's just so many better shows now. When Bleach, when I was watching Bleach when I was younger, it was the show. It was Naruto and Bleach and that's it. I hear what you're saying. I also think it's harder to, it's harder for animes like Bleach to compete with new age stuff. Hence the reason why they've gone from like,

continuous episodes to seasons because new age animated seasons now as opposed to just running shit as they used to. And because there's like minimum 12, maximum maybe like 24 episodes in a season nowadays,

Every episode has to be fire. - Yeah, of course. - We're talking your Kaijus, we're talking your solos, all them ones, they have to be fire. Chainsaw Man, all them ones, you know what I'm saying? - When's that coming back? - Let's Google that, please. - When's Chainsaw Man coming back, bro? - Let's Google that, please. - Sometime in 2024. - Your fucking mum, that's a lie. It ain't coming this year. - It can't be, it can't be. - It's not gonna happen. - We're in October, it's not coming. - 'Cause the new seasons are out now, they're out this time, so yeah, it's not. - It's March now. - Yeah. - They'll bring that out March next year.

Yeah. Oh, it's boring, man. But I do hear what you're saying about this bleach thing. I still love it. Don't get me wrong. But I can hear where you're coming from. Yeah, I mean, I'm enjoying it. But yeah, like I said, like...

New Age anime is obviously, it's hard for Bleach because Bleach has no choice but to continue with the story that it was back then. Whereas all the New Age shit has taken Bleach, taken Naruto, taken One Piece, taken all these older stories and made something crazy. And now Bleach is still being like, oh, with a classic, we've got some New Age fights, we've got some better animation, but we're still following the same story where it's like, I've seen this, bro. Like,

They just can't keep up. - Yeah. - And it's cool. It is cool. I know I am enjoying it, but it's like there's anime coming out right now that I'm in love with and I'm just not in love with Bleach. - Fair play. - Guys, we're taking a very, very quick break to talk about one thing and one thing only. You already know what that is. It's Manscaped. Fellas, listen close. Do you want your grooming routine to be a one and done deal? Rhetorical, obviously you do.

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a trimmer for the moneymaker and another for the boys downstairs. Get 20% off plus free shipping with the code SNG. SierraNovemberGolf. At Manscaped.com. That's 20% off plus free shipping with the code SNG. SierraNovemberGolf. Manscaped.com for the premium grooming experience trust Manscaped. Yeah. Speaking of shows. Talk to me.

I haven't started watching this yet, but there's a new Love is Blind America out. And when I say, so I've told you before about obviously, because we just finished the UK season, obviously premises, guys, girls. I don't think we've had any gay ones yet. I guess it would be too difficult because they all have to date each other. But yeah, guys, girls, they date in pods and yeah.

you find connections and you, you ask the date people again and all this kind of stuff. And you basically whittle it down. And eventually the aim of the game is to find someone that you can fall in love with that you've never met and agree to date.

be engaged to them kind of thing. Fam, I've only seen a couple clips. When I say, I've told you before, they wanna, sometimes they'll secretly put shit in there to find out what the other person looks like. They're not even holding back this time. Bro, there's one motherfucker in there. I don't know his name yet. He was in there just like, oh, bruv, it's just jarring, man, because...

I just want to find love. Like all I care about is someone loving me for me. And then she'll be like, yeah, yeah. Interesting. Cool. And he's like, yeah, it's just, I'm so rich that it's difficult because I want to know you're with me for me and not stacks and stacks and stacks and stacks of cash, bro. Yeah. Was I lucky that,

I inherited a business when I was 30. Yeah, bro, sure I was. Were my parents incredibly rich and just left me all this money as well as this business? Yeah, they did. I'm fortunate. Ooh, cry me a river. I'm a bit lucky. I am crazy money and I spend crazy money on Gat. If I love you, I'm dropping bags on you. Yeah. Okay. But anyway, love is blind. Um...

leo all right yeah type in leo yep yeah that geezer right there that geezer right there yeah bro say less yeah leo's a waste man he's in i'm just so rich bro and i'm an art dealer and fuck sake i'm just tired of being waiting for my money okay when i say the type the thing sat up in her seat yeah and there's another journal there who exactly the same way opposite she was just like bruv it's just

It's jarring to me that all I want is, oh, go down. I think it's the chick in the bright green blouse. - Oh yeah. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. In the middle. I'm pretty sure it's her. She was like, bro, it's just jarring to me that like, all I want is love. All I want is a connection. All I want is good conversation. I just want that. But like every time I'm with a man, they're just like, they just think I'm so bang.

They just think I'm so peng and they just think I'm this sexy little fuck toy to be ogled at and I'm an object. I'm more than just firing this fuck. Yeah. Man, I'm like...

- How fine are we actually talking? - Yeah, what's the scale? - Yeah, because you're spitting. So what are we actually saying, bro? Yeah, she was just like, "Them two, toxic." I was so over "Love Is Blind," but I'm gonna have to just peek. I'm gonna take a peek about what this season's saying because them man are trying shit. And from what I'm hearing, they've already patterned things. Both of them, yeah, they've already patterned. 'Cause of course you will.

A man said I'm rich as shit Yeah I'm tired of people Just wanting me for my money Yeah Love me for me Love me for me Okay cool And have the money on the side He knows what he's doing Yeah and she's like I promise you I'm the pengest thing you've seen I'm too peng And people just wanna fuck me Yeah

Love me for my inside, not my out. - I'm intelligent, I'm witty, I'm funny. I bring a lot to the table. I'm more than just this. I am more than this breathtaking object you see in front of you. - Say less. - Man, I have to sneak a peek. - Yeah. - Yeah. - She would fool me too. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - She would fool me too. - Of course, bro.

Yeah, it's mental. All right. So yeah, lovers by USA, you know what you're doing. Shame on you, but I will be tuning in. Cool. Exactly. Shame on you, but I will be tuning in. They know what they're doing. Right. I've been waiting for this for like a while now. I'm assuming you've seen it as well. Yeah. Get it off your chest, guys. Joker, well gone for this, man. So Joker number two, folia de.

- Should be worse than that. - Yeah, I understand what the writers and Todd Phillips, the director was trying to do and was trying to portray. So if we flash back to Joker one, yes, he's for lack of a better time, he's nuts. - Yeah. - He's nuts, right? And his coping mechanism is his imagination and music. So in, I was gonna say season two, in the second movie,

it hones in on that so much. So every trail of thought, imagination wise that he has, it breaks out into song. - That's boring. - Every single time.

Every single time. So it's like, he could be in jail watching TV and someone will say something to him. Someone will say something to him and he will start breaking out into song, start walking around, walking around, but he will get back to his original spot and you realize, oh, that was his imagination. And it happens a lot of times. It happens at least six times. No, it's too many times. And he's doing it with Gaga. Do you see what I'm saying? And I understand why they try to portray this

but I feel like it wasn't executed properly at all. - In number one, but I think in number one they did that maybe once. - Exactly, they did it a couple times. - It was a lot of imagination in number one, but it wasn't all music and dancing and all this kind of shit. - It wasn't, they've honed in on that a lot more because for one, this is all set in jail or it's his trial. So there's only two scenes or two, yeah, two scenes really in the whole movie.

There's something that, you've seen the movie, right? - Yeah. - There's something that does happen in the movie. There's something that does happen in a movie where you think, oh, this is setting this shit up for number three. I think you know what I'm talking about. I'm not talking about the ending, not the ending, but the bit before the end when he's in the courtroom. - Yeah, yeah. - Do you remember? So yeah, there's something that happens, you feel like, oh, okay, maybe this could potentially

linked to a number three where it turns into like some dark thing where it's like they're terrorizing Arkham and Gotham rather. And you think, okay, cool, cool, cool. Doesn't turn out that way. And you're just like, where is this going? That's all I kept thinking. Where is this going? Where is this going? There's no, he is, Arthur Fleck is tired of being

told he's the Joker, but he's also tired of people telling him he's not the Joker, he's Arthur Fleck. So I feel like he's battling who he is as a human being. - Yeah, crisis of identity. - Yes, literally yes. And it's one of them ones where you only get to see the Joker in his imagination, which is him breaking out into song. You don't see any other Joker-esque activities as Arthur Fleck. It's boring.

It's fucking boring. You men did a terrible job. It pissed me off, man. Because it's so... It was so highly anticipated. Number one was amazing. Amazing. I've seen it twice. It was so highly anticipated. And you come with this. It's like... There's a little... Obviously, you've seen the ending, so you know why I'm going. But there's a little... You can spoil it, by the way. I don't give a fuck about watching this now. All right.

- Everyone says dog shit. I'm not watching it. - I'm not watching it. - I don't even class it as part of the series. I think it's like an alternate thing. - Excommunicado. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just class it as that. So you want to know what happens at the end? - Go on. - Yeah, he gets, he gets nanked. He gets nanked in jail. Like, ga, ga, ga, ga, ga, ga, ga. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Oh. - And there's a little theory that the person that nanked him may be the new Joker. - Is the actual Joker. - Yeah. - Yeah.

did you see at the beginning yeah so when he gets stabbed he's like he dies by the way and um blurred in the background the guy who stabbed him starts like cutting like a scar there's like a smile and you're like what the and they reference his like they reference they don't reference him they show his face yeah three or four times throughout the movie and you can tell he's he's not there yeah he's tapped yeah he's tapped that's dumb yeah bro

It's fucking nuts That sucks man Well I did hear that Todd Phillips said he's not doing any more DC That's it he's out Thank god That's brutal Such a shame man Thank god That's brutal Because number one's fantastic Yeah yeah He did well in number one Yeah This bullshit Damn

- Damn. - It got apparently got lower ratings than Morbius did. - Yeah, I heard about that. - Morbius is fucking dog shit. - I've not seen it and never will. - Yeah, it's dog shit. - Yeah, 28%. - So I think even this is generous. 33%. - I think 33, 5.3 is generous. - 5.3 is generous, man. - Really? - I rated it a four and I was being- - 45%. - You were being nice? - I was being nice with four out of 10. Damn, bro. - Oh yeah, that's a, yeah. - I heard Gaga was very underutilized, was the- - Yeah, she, ugh.

There's so much more, 'cause as soon as I saw that, or as soon as we all saw that Gaga was going to be in it, obviously she's gonna be Harley Quinn, I was thinking, okay, these men are gonna go tap for tap. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Because I can see her playing a tapped Harley Quinn. - Yeah, facts. - Not utilized at all. Not in that way. Not utilized at all in that way whatsoever. - Was she there to just be a Gaga sing sing? - Yeah, so they're obviously love interests and she,

She puts herself into the asylum

only to meet him. It's all a ruse to meet him and for them to like be a pair. So she's always supporting him in court. But when he decided, okay, I am no longer the Joker. I am Arthur Fleck, blah, blah, blah, fuck all this shit. She leaves him. - Oh, what? - She leaves him. Yeah, bro, it's- - That's dumb, bro. - There's no grit. There's no darkness. There's darkness in the darkness that I'm looking for in terms of like arms house or whatever. There's just all like mental darkness.

And it's, they should have made this into like a series or something, not a movie. Maybe like a four part episode, four part series. - Yeah, yeah. - And just like left this, that, and then maybe did a movie afterwards after killing him off. But it just- - I've never walked out before. I almost walked out. - Really? - And I've never ever almost walked out of a film. I usually, I almost walked out. - I had a lot of people walk out. - Yeah, you could hear a lot of people. What was making me laugh, 'cause there's so much singing in it and it gets ridiculous.

It's like, it'll be a really good intense scene and singing will break out. You'll hear like after the third time the singing got introduced, start singing, everyone just goes. - Everyone's like, fuck off. - It's crazy, mate. - I don't know how these men went to the premiere with their chest held high. - Yeah, man. And by the way, apparently it costs the exact same to make as "Dune II".

- Wow, really? - It's just insane. Like you compare the films. - "Dune II" is a next level movie. - Yeah, "Dune II" is awesome. - God almighty, that movie is fucking good and looks incredibly expensive. - Yeah, badass. - Yeah, and it's the same, apparently. - I think I saw the, like number one cost like 50 million or whatever that. - Yeah, so this one cost- - This one was like 200 million, right? - This one cost 140. - No, no, that's what they got. - That's the box office. - That's the box office. - Oh my God. - It cost 200 M's. - Yeah, it cost 200 M's. The first one cost 50 and made like,

A hundred and something. Budget, 55 million. 55 million. Gross over 1 billion. And then two budgets. I'm pretty sure this budget was 200 million. 200 mil. Yeah, bro. Flopping, bro. Yeah. Scary hours, bro. Scary hours indeed. But talking about cinematography. Is this your rec but not a rec? Yes. Okay. So there is a show that I watched season one and two of, completely forgot about, and only recently just jumped back on.

And when I say Jon Favreau knows what he's doing, he knows what he's doing. The Mandalorian. Yeah, I've heard nothing but incredible things about The Mandalorian, you know? Yeah, man. Season three is booming. Really? He knows what he's doing, brother. Obviously, he's the homeboy Pedro Pascal, number one actor in the world right now. He's doing bits. And he is...

The show is really, really good, but I wanted to talk about this because this is not a recommendation. Why what actually wanted to get onto was, I've said on this show before, I don't give a fuck about Star Wars. Obviously, Star Wars is, or if not, probably the biggest franchise in the world. Yep. And-

I'm only being ignorant by saying I'm not gonna watch it, but I love this show. - Oh bro. - And obviously this is only like a sub sector of the whole franchise. - I spent my, me, my brother and my dad, my brother and my dad are way more in Star Wars than me, but my childhood was very Star Wars orientated. We watched a lot of fucking Star Wars. - Gang, so I've said to myself, after I finished watching season three of the Mandalorian, the same way I binged

probably twice now the marvel universe franchise i am going to start star wars from the jump whoa really yeah okay and you're really gonna struggle i don't i have the time okay fair enough i have the time and it's all on disney plus yeah everything's on disney all the series and the movies on disney you're gonna hate the old ones i know but also you need to remember with them now being on disney are you talking about hate because of cinematography or because of like the plot slash storyline

- Because the- - Both. - I disagree, well, I've not seen it so I don't know, but what I would say is,

When they bring old movies back on Disney, like the production value is clearer. It's a lot clearer. I mean, don't get me wrong. We're talking about the 70s. I know. I know. The first one was 1977. Yeah, there's only so much they can do. A New Hope, number four. Yeah. I've done my research. Yeah. Yeah. Right. Are you going from starting with A New Hope or are you starting with episode one? No, I am watching it in release order, not chronological order. Okay, release order. Fair enough. So you're watching A New Hope first. A New Hope. I think that's number four or number six. Yikes. It's number four. Right. So...

Yikes. Yeah. The reason I say yikes is because when I say you're going to hate it, same way I said about Bleach, everything we know about science fiction is based on Star Wars in some loose way. Like any director today or anyone who's making anything was science fiction is obsessed with Star Wars. So you're going to see little bits of Star Wars that like,

In the 70s when this came out. Yeah. Like obviously, you know Darth Vader's his dad, right? Everyone knows that. When that came out, that was like, oh, fuck. Are you insane? Yeah.

That's a joke of a plot now because it's been rinsed to death because everyone loves Star Wars so much that they based their entire career off making shit that was like the foundation was Star Wars. So when I say you're gonna hate it, it's just gonna seem so boring to you. - I understand. But I also, again,

I've done it with so many other franchises. Fair enough, bro. I rate it, bro. I'm going to do it. I'm proud of you. I'm going to do it. I've got... It's only my mindset that's telling me, fuck Star Wars, but why? Everyone else has seen it. Yeah, bro. There are bits of it you're going to like. Like, bro, Lando Calrissian. Cool as fuck. Princess Leia in the bikini thing. Cool, man. Cool. Yeah. Jabba the Hutt. Yeah. Yeah. Ringo Monombo. Yeah, bro. Cool as fuck, bro. I'm going to watch them all, man. And then, like, yeah, it's the...

The fighting's really bad. Again, you won't find the plot interesting because you would have seen every adaptation of that plot your entire life. But as a foundation, bang, bang, bang, get those out of the way quickly. And then I still think episode one, bangs. Okay. Darth Maul, villain. Okay. Villain. Okay. Episode two, bangs. Okay. Episode three. Yeah. Yeah.

- Okay, cool. - Now we're cooking. - Okay, cool. - Bro, Ewan McGregor? - Yeah. - Performs in episode three. - Say less. - Yeah, Ben Kenobi? - Yeah. - Yeah, bro. - I'm gonna watch all the series as well. 'Cause they've got, there's Osaka, there's obviously Mandalorian, there's- - Attack of the Clones is good. - Yeah, that's number two.

- Oh, you mean the animated show? - The animated show. - I've heard Attack of the Clones. I've not seen it. - That's actually really good. - I've heard Attack of the Clones, the animated show is fucking amazing. - The Book of Boba Fett is a series, Andor's a series, Obi-Wan Kenobi's a series. There's like five or six different series now on Amazon, on Disney, sorry. - Fair play, bro. It's worth it, man. Like it is really, really good franchise. - Yeah, I'm a lock in. - There's villains in Star Wars, bro. - I can imagine, I'm a tap in because,

Yeah, watching The Mandalorian, I'm thoroughly enjoying it. They're going to make a Mandalorian movie as well, The Mandalorian and Grogu. Damn, bro. Yeah. Jon Favreau again. Some of the new, new ones are quite good as well. Rogue One. I've seen that one. Yeah, you liked it? Yeah, I liked it, of course. Oh, gang. You're in for a treat, bro. Is Rogue One the one with Jon Favreau? Oh, no. Because I've seen both. And I've seen Solo, a Solo one, the one with Donald Glover in as well. I can't even remember.

I've definitely seen Rogue One. That was him. No, this one isn't got John Baer. It's not John Favreau. John Baer got this one. This is, yeah, this is another spinoff one. This one was good.

The one with John Boyega is, what's it called? Star Wars Left. Force Awakens. I also watched Who Cloned Tyrone. I enjoyed that movie. It was good. I enjoyed that movie. Yeah, it was good. Jamie Foxx did a wonderful job in that movie. Yes, he did. Yeah, he did really good. Yes, he did. Good actor, man. Yeah, that was a good... I skipped past it when it came out. It's on Netflix, right? Yeah. Yeah, when it first came out,

- The trailer doesn't do it justice. - Yeah, it probably was the trailer. I was just like, "Meh, I'm all right." Yeah, good movie, bro. I watched it on like a Sunday afternoon. - Rotten Tomatoes, 95%. - Damn. - Yeah. - Damn. Fair play. - Trailer doesn't do it justice. - Yeah, I liked it, man. Tweets of the week? - Tweets of the week to finish this off. Tweet and his own reply to this. "I'm officially Muslim," reply. "Nevermind. These niggas caught me with a ham sandwich already." - God.

Losing women romantically is hilarious. Oh no, I've lost the opportunity to pay for everything. How will I survive? Bro, that reminds me. I have to show you a TikTok. Okay, go on. This guy, Leo Gonzalez, funny on TikTok. Funny on TikTok, bro. Say less. And he did this one. I won't even speak about it, bro. Just, yeah, we'll just watch it. You like it? Talk to her. Nah, I'll talk to her. Hey! Hey!

Yes. You're single or what? You could never. Could never what? Bag a loner eating at the restaurant by herself? It's not Tumblr, mijita. Please be so for real. I'm not interested. If I wanted you, I would have to say much less. It was actually from my homie here who actually has bad taste. So he's interested? No.

No, no, you think he wants you after this? That was embarrassing. You need to be a little more humble, and you're a little too shallow. You need to be a little more demure, okay? That would go a long way. No, that's embarrassing. You ended up with nothing. So, yeah, you're right. I couldn't have.

- Fucking savage. - You've already sent it to me, put it in the chat, but I've seen that one before. - Mejita. - Mejita. - I wish I had Spanglish in my wheelhouse. I wish I had Spanglish in my wheelhouse, bro. - Mejita. - It is different. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - It is different. - That's embarrassing. Bro, he is jokes on TikTok. - Say less. - I stay binging his stuff, bro. - Say less. - Big props to him. He's too funny, man. - Fair play. - Sorry. - Shout out to him, man. No, mine, mine, mine. - I missed the opportunity to pay for everything. Damn.

All right. Are you into Adrian numbers? Reply. Yes. Why? Reply. Do you want to get 888 out? Reply. Yes, please. With the threes. That's a good back and forth. That's one of the, that's exactly, call back to the beginning of the episode. That's exactly the conversation I'll get myself into. I'd be too scared to perform. Do you want to get 888 out? Yes, please. I'm knackered. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

- I'm truly exhausted. - I'm not going there. And you're not coming here. - Yeah, facts. - Fuck sake. - Oh God. - All right, okay. This one needs a bit of context. So Bruno Fernandes, captain of Man United, got sent off against Tottenham and got sent off against, I can't remember, he got sent off back to back two different games, but they got appealed. Well, one got appealed anyway. So first tweet, "Can you imagine if Paul Pogba got red cards back to back?"

Quote to you. They'd question his upbringing. - Bro. - Wow. - Bro. - Wow. - And when they say they, it's only one person I'll probably question his upbringing. Gary Souness. - Swear. - He's a Scouse, ex-Scouse footballer. He's now a pundit.

- Really? - Yeah, this was time ago. Obviously he doesn't play in the Premier League anymore. - Because he's arrogant or what? - S-O-U-N-E-S, N-E-S-S, sorry. Oh, Graham Sooner, sorry, not Gary, my bad, my bad. I have no idea why- - I've seen his brother. - He hates him so much. It's such a known thing in football.

that graham students hates paul yeah he just the way he talks about him the way he talks not even just about united it's just about pogba it's it's so weird damn it's so weird damn yeah man all right i've got um i've got one more tweet from a chick finding out a guy's dick big be crazy you know what i am free this saturday rafael dick's nuts rafael dick is insane

I will never forget being 19 years of age and hearing from a girl I was chatting to. I remember she lived near, she lived near a guy that I played basketball with one time. And I can't remember how we got into that discussion, but just common, whatever. And then she was like, oh, she told me that she'd slept with him before. And I was like, why? And then she was like, oh, my girls just said, one of my girls talked to me and said he had a big dick. And I was like,

- Yeah, stuff like that didn't make sense back then. - Sorry? - Yeah, that's crazy. It's like saying, "Oh, you banged a girl." And I'm like, "Why did I bang her?" 'Cause I heard that she had a tight tongue. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - What does that mean, bro? - I heard the pussy was gushy, bro. - Isn't it? - What? - What are you talking about? - Yeah, what are you actually talking about?

Guys do not Considering guys are so much more savage Yeah In certain aspects Like We do not operate like that We just don't There's no way you can tell me Oh I banged a girl Ting was gushing And me thinking Well I'm following her now Yeah facts I need to know what I feel like Yeah I need to know what I feel like That's impossible It's insanity Like yeah we'll actually move like that Like I thought this guy got a big dick

say swear. Show me. Yeah, yeah, yeah, cool. I'm going to fuck him as well then. Jesus Christ. Yeah, but I hear, I do hear through the grapevine that finding big, big tall is a rarity. Like a true rarity. Okay. So once they find it, that's why they put up with bullshit. That's why they put up with bullshit. And like, I remember we had this chat. I think we actually did have this chat with Megan in America. I was trying to find the,

the gender opposite comparison. - Okay. - So I could understand like, what is this big dick thing? And we kind of came up to the, we came into the conclusion of like, imagine, imagine being crazy horny as a guy, crazy horny. And then every girl you went to sleep with, the pussy was so dry, you physically couldn't get your dick in.

You could not do it. And you could never not from like top or a handjob or anything like that. You're always close, but you need to bang. You have to bang. And every time you get it in, it's just not working. And it's just, and then she nuts every time.

She nuts just from you, just from you trying to get in, she's busting. And then she buses from you trying to get in and she's like, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop. And she goes to sleep and you're like, are you insane, big man? Are you insane? - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, okay. - And then you get a kind of okay nut from her giving you head for like an hour. And you're like, slow down, speed up, slow down, speed up. Okay, rhythm, yep, yep, keep going, keep going, keep going. And then you're not, and you're like,

- Okay. - That was tasking. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, that was tasking. Imagine that happens every single girl, every single time. And then one time you find the girl slides in. - Yeah, she's a keeper. - Yeah, bam! - She's a keeper, yeah, she's a keeper. - Yeah. - Yeah, I'm not letting her go. - Yeah, exactly. - I'm not holding back. - And then she puts hands on you. She puts hands on you and calls you a broke bitch and a useless bum.

but that is not that's toxicity yeah of course bro you go back and you go back and she takes all your money and she makes a dirt she makes your yard dirty she's not even that hygienic she's useless she doesn't even have like she has no aspirations or goals she's got 11 followers and just nothing's going on yeah she follows 5 000. yeah nothing's going on but that

Every time you're in there, you've never felt something like that again. And you have no idea when the next time is gonna happen. Every time you leave her, you're back to dry, dry, dry, dry, dry. You go through 20 dries as he hits you up with just a video. Just bap, bap, bap, bap. Come get it. Running back. Of course, bro. Running back. That's big dick. Fair. And that's how we're concluding the episode. That's how we conclude the episode, bro.

Fuck, I'm sorry guys. I'm sorry that you'll have to deal with that. That's horrible. Yeah, it's vile. But anyway guys, beautiful episode. As always, head on over to patreon.com/shitsandgigs. Watch our episodes, enjoy our episodes, become part of our community, become a baby and your daddies will take care of you. Love, love, love.

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