cover of episode Ask, Tell, Confess: Who Got Motorboated?

Ask, Tell, Confess: Who Got Motorboated?

2024/9/20
logo of podcast Dumb Blonde

Dumb Blonde

Chapters

Las anfitrionas discuten las dinámicas de las conexiones en la gira, incluyendo el uso de salas de ducha o habitaciones de hotel para mayor privacidad. También comparten una anécdota divertida sobre un incidente con pies malolientes.
  • Las invitadas usan salas de ducha o habitaciones de hotel para los encuentros casuales.
  • Un invitado tuvo un incidente embarazoso con pies malolientes.

Shownotes Transcript

Let's talk about our favorite fall scents. I love marshmallows. I love the smell of s'mores. I love the smell of dark chocolate. I love the smell of rain on a dreary autumn night. Not a pumpkin spice latte fan, though. Sorry, ladies. But you want to know what's not on this list? B.O., let's face it.

Summer isn't the only time we get body odor. We can get just as smelly under our favorite fall sweaters. That's why I'm excited to tell you about Lume's whole body deodorant for pits, privates, and beyond. As a special offer, new customers get 15% off all Lume products with our exclusive code. Use code BUNNIEXO, B-U-N-N-I-E-X-O, baby, at LumeDeodorant.com. That's L-U-M-E-D-E-R-O-M-E.

O-D-O-R-A-N-T dot com. You guys already know I've been preaching to you for months now. I absolutely love Lume products and now that I'm on tour under pressure 24-7, what do I got with me? A whole case full of Lume. You bet your buttons. Lume's starter pack is perfect for new customers. It comes with a solid stick deodorant,

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Hey guys, I need to ask you a question. I want to know why in the hell are you not on Patreon? I don't think you guys even realize how much content we have on Patreon. Let me break it down for you. We have the BunnyXO show. We have Meet the D-Fords. We have Popaganda. We have more shows that we're adding every day.

And not to mention, we have the visuals of the podcast. Not only that, we have four tiers that caters to everybody's budget and everybody gets the podcast. There's no more excuses. Head over to www.patreon.com backslash dumb blonde podcast and sign up. Stop missing out. We have built a huge community over there, guys. I'm talking about

hundreds of thousands of people over there. We even have live chats, live chats that I actually am talking in every single night. Last but not least, we give away gifts every fricking month. I'm talking like signed stuff from Jay and I, lives. You just never know what kind of surprise you're gonna get. It's like a Cracker Jack box. I love the community that we've built over there at Patreon. If you are already a Patreon member,

I freaking love you, dude. Thank you so much. You guys are my babies for life, my writers. If I could, I would literally make out with each and every one of you. I love you guys so much. And that's a lot of kisses, actually. Gotta go, bye. Ask, tell, confess. Ask, tell, confess. Ask, tell, confess. Ask, tell, confess. I am not okay.

I'm barely getting by. Hello, friends. Welcome back to another Ask, Tell, Confess. Dude, somebody had me do that at a meet and greet. It was the funniest thing ever. They came up to me and they were like, can you please just do the sound? And I'm like, which sound? Because we do so many. She's like, the Ask, Tell, Confess. I was like, yes, I'll do it. I'll do it right now.

Oh, how are you guys doing? We are on the road. We're actually reporting live from our tour bus right now. Hello.

Haley's here with me. Hello. Mimi went home. Yeah, it's just us. Mimi went home because she likes her family more than us. Freaking rude. Thinking about firing her over that. That's ridiculous. Tasha went home too because she's got fucking eight kids. We're the lone rangers out here. God, okay. All right, so this week, it looks like Mimi had you guys ask us tour questions. So why don't you go ahead and kick it off? Okay. Okay.

So, I was wondering if whoever has a booty call, how do y'all manage that? Y'all hang a towel in the mirror of the bus or if it's one of the band members or one of y'all's honorage, do they rent a hotel room or what? We just sit around and watch. Yeah. Just totally kidding. No, we get as far away as possible. Yeah. So, usually when we're parked, they have their own, they have a room. Like we'll have a, it's called a shower room or whatever. So, yeah.

If they don't want to stay on the bus, they can sleep in the hotel room. So yeah, that's usually whenever you guys decide to have a booty call. But there isn't a lot. Haley has no booty calls on the bus. And fucking the dude took his fucking shoes off and he had fucking stinky tinks. Literally, I've never smelled feet like that. It was so bad. And Haley is such a sweetheart. She was trying to like say it was her. It probably was. I said, bitch, hold on. Chachi. Chachi.

God, I swear every time we try to record anything, he goes straight over to his bowl of food and just starts fucking hound dogging, dude. I mean, come on, my little Turkish delight. Get up here. Come on. Anyways. Yeah. So Haley was so sweet about it.

That she tried to blame it on her. And I was like, Haley, don't ever fucking say you stink for a man. Ever. But my feet stink sometimes. Not like that. That was musty dude, Paul. Okay. Okay. So, yeah. They usually use a shower room or get a room or something like that. There's not a whole lot, though. Yeah. Okay, give me yours. Okay, okay. I got one. Give me a confesh.

Hold on. I was saving the confetti. Don't tell me how to run my show. How about that? Okay. What perfume do you guys use? You all smelled so good when I met you in Orlando. Bitch, you took mine. You have to find a good one. I'm scared to tell people because I don't want it to sell out.

Should we gatekeep? Are we gatekeepers now? Oh, this one. We have to. Do you think? I feel bad gatekeeping from the girlies. I think there's enough. I think there's enough. We'll just buy a lot more. Oh.

We have a community one. All right. Tell them what it is. It is Kylie Cosmetics Cosmic. It smells so good. I would never buy some sort of perfume like that, but they wore it on the bus and I was like, I was spending $1,000 a bottle on Tom Ford.

And I was like, how much is that? And they were like, how much is it? It's like a hundred bucks or less. A hundred bucks or less for this fucking shit. And it smells so good. It's like warm. Vanilla sugar. A hint of flora. I don't know. You just want to eat it. Oh my God. It's you smell like a freaking cookie. It's so good.

Yeah, it's so good. So you guys go out and get it, Kylie. Shout out to Kylie. I expect a kickdown from all the sales you're about to get. Or a PR package full of them. PR package would be great, Kylie. Just a box full of

Spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down. Medicine go down. Medicine go down. How did you know that? You never know any of that stuff. That is so funny. So Kylie, I'll be expecting my PR baggage, please. Thank you very much. All right.

Let's talk about our favorite fall scents. I love marshmallows. I love the smell of s'mores. I love the smell of dark chocolate. I love the smell of rain on a dreary autumn night. Not a pumpkin spice latte fan though. Sorry ladies.

But you want to know what's not on this list? B.O. Let's face it, summer isn't the only time we get body odor. We can get just as smelly under our favorite fall sweaters. That's why I'm excited to tell you about Lume's Whole Body Deodorant for pits, privates, and beyond. As a special offer, new customers get 15% off all Lume products with our exclusive code. Use code BUNNIEXO, B-U-N-N-I-E-X-O, baby.

at LumeDeodorant.com. That's L-U-M-E-D-E-O-D-O-R-A-N-T.com. You guys already know I've been preaching to you for months now. I absolutely love Lume products. And now that I'm on tour under pressure 24-7, what do I got with me? A whole case full of Lume. You bet your buttons. Lume's starter pack is perfect for new customers. It comes with a solid stick deodorant,

Cream tube deodorant, two free products of your choice like mini body wash and deodorant wipes and free shipping. As a special offer for listeners, new customers get 15% off all Lumi products with our exclusive code. And if you combine the 15% off with the already discounted starter pack, that equals over 40% off their starter pack.

Use code BUNNIEXO, B-U-N-N-I-E-X-O for 15% off your first purchase at LumeDeodorant.com. That's code BUNNIEXO, B-U-N-N-I-E-X-O at L-U-M-E-D-E-O-D-O-R-A-N-T.com. Being an adult has its high points. Like you can eat ice cream for dinner anytime, or if you want to stay up all night, you can. But it's not always fun.

You also have to do your taxes and figure out what's for dinner every freaking night. I hate it. And make doctor's appointments. And for that one, there is ZocDoc, the healthcare app that makes adulting that much easier. ZocDoc is a free app and website where you can search and compare high quality in-network doctors. Choose the right one for your needs and click to enter.

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appointments you guys know i absolutely hate going to the doctor so if i can get a tele doctor i'm all for it i use them you should too you guys know i have anxiety so i absolutely love the comfort of being able to be in my own home and do it from an app it's absolutely seamless

So stop putting off those doctor's appointments and go to ZocDoc.com slash bunny, B-U-N-N-I-E, to find and instantly book a top-rated doctor today. That's Z-O-C-D-O-C.com slash bunny. ZocDoc.com slash bunny. Did you guys ever do the period simulator on the guys on tour? I'm dying to see this.

Nope, not yet, but we are going to do it. We'll do it soon. I just literally during the day, I don't have any freaking time. We're pretty busy. It's hard to wrangle up all the boys too to try to do this to them, but we're going to get it done. I think it's going to be so funny.

Yeah. Watching them have cramps. Yeah. I can't wait. They're not going to be able to handle it. They're never going to be able to handle it. They would cry. On level one. On level fucking .5. Seriously. I know how I feel whenever I have my fucking ovaries getting ripped out by a fork. So I can only imagine how the fuck that's what it feels like, dude. It's like Chachi's munching on mine. Bro, it's so bad. Like,

I literally do not even want to fucking talk to anybody when I'm on my period. Nope. And yeah, can we just talk about how the world knows that I wear diapers now? Diaper diva. Bro, you should make your own line of diapers. Oh my God.

Maybe in about 10 or 15 years, sure. I'll do it. No problem, okay? Do it now. Pink ones. Fuck me, dude. I am not doing... Money XO diaper line. In case you guys have your head in the sand, every freaking headline last week about me had to do with...

Me wearing diapers on my period. I think it's great. I did not think that that was going to be such a big deal. I mean, my PR Jen Vessio was like, next time, can you run that by me? I was like, Jen, I'm talking about period diapers. I'm like, dude, how did I think that that was going to go? We didn't think that was going to blow up. At all. And then I'm talking to my husband and my husband's like, I love the fact that any other time that you're in the news, it's always Bunny XO. He goes, but when you're wearing diapers, it's Jelly Roll's wife. Yeah.

I was like, bro. I was so, I don't know. I was just like, you know what? Nobody in the world's ever going to think I'm hot again. I mean, there's a niche for everything. I know. Some guy out there is. Jay said my price just went up. He's like, price went up. Yeah, you could sell that. People want to. You could sell your diapers probably. Oh my goodness gracious. I'm sure there's some creep out there. Just vacuum seal that baby and ship it off. Yep. Yep. The Jajji fart. Oh man.

Crop dust. Crop duster. Old diaper Dan over here. Billory the goat. She's one of our main girls on Patreon. I love her. She's so sweet. She said, confess. I asked Jelly to sign my titties back in 2019. As he turned to grab the Sharpies, security guard rushed us away and I heard Jelly say, never let the titties leave unsigned as the door shut behind me.

That is so fucking funny. That's you. No, literally. Me and my husband have this thing where it's like, never let the titties leave unsigned. Anytime you guys want us to sign titties, we're going to sign them. The other day, we were driving, and I was like, oh my god, that girl had her whole ass hanging out because it looked really good. Mm-hmm.

And Jay was like, you're supposed to warn me ahead of time so I can see it too. It was so bad. I was like, I just caught a glimpse of it out of the corner of my eye. No, we love titties. We love asses. We love all the women that show up for us. I think I signed my first pair of titties this tour. You got motorboated this tour. I did. You did. I did. You loved it. Yeah. Yeah.

Yes, I did. She loved it. I loved it so much. She wants all of you guys to motorboater at every meet and greet. Yes, I do. Those big old fucking, those big old luscious, luxurious honkers. Put your face in between them.

Yes. As you can tell, we get excited just talking about titties around here. I love how my podcast is so proper and healing. And then you get to the Ask, Tell, Confess, and it's like, good lord. Sex, boobs, poop. What is happening, dude? Speaking of poop. No. What are we talking about? It's Ask. It's okay. Okay. How many toilets are on that bus? Six.

Some need five minutes to poop and some need 20 minutes of position Zen and medication meditation and deep breathing to let that shit go. So what do you do if all the toilets are taken and you got to go?

There's two on this bus. There's two, but I don't think we've had that problem. We've never had that problem because I always let people use my shower or my toilet. So I'm not like one of those people who's like, you can't use this. Yeah. There are some buses that only have one. Oh, God. I don't know how they would do that. Well, we also don't have that many people. Like, I feel bad for the people with like 12 people on the bus. Oh, my gosh. Imagine. No. The most we have on our bus is six.

Yeah. We don't all have to shit at the same time. We just don't eat. And we also, most of the time we're parked at the venue. So they can go in and use the dressing room bathroom. Or we have a hotel room. So we make sure that everybody is always kind of like looked after. Taken care of.

Yeah. Yeah. You got to take care of the crew while you're on tour, man. Yeah. They're all you got. Yeah. All right, guys. You're always asking about my skincare regimen and I eat, sleep, live and breathe Oak Essentials. This is everything I use on my face from their Moisture Rich Balm.

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Has your anxiety relaxed as the years have passed or is it still nerve wracking when you go on stage or out in the arenas? I'm so excited to go to the next show close to me in November. You know, I've been getting this question a lot. Excuse me. I just burped up tuna. I've been getting this question a lot.

I make tuna tostadas. Ew. I've been getting this question a lot because, and I've talked about it. I've touched base on it somewhere. I don't even know. It might have been the podcast or one of these Ask, Tell, Confesses. But I truly believe in exposure therapy. I preach it and I live it and I practice what I preach.

If you are scared of something, face it head on. And somehow, some way, it retrains the neuropathogens in your brain to realize that you're safe. Last year, I was doing these meet and greets, and I was panicked every time. I wore a mask. I had gloves on. It was ridiculous. Always had to wear long sleeves. Yeah, because I didn't want to be touched, like my skin to touch other people. And this year, I'm hugging everybody. Yeah, you're half naked. Yeah.

Half naked hugging everybody. Not to say that I still don't have to go and do my rituals after and wash my hands and decompress. And sometimes I'll feel anxiety coming on. No, you're getting so much better. So much better. And touring has helped my anxiety so much because before I was almost borderline agoraphobic and didn't want to leave the house. And my husband came to me and was like, you are reminding me so much of my mom. And he's like, if you don't get out of the house, we are going to have to rethink our marriage. And that really...

And I know to some people that might seem harsh, but I have to be kind of like spoken to that way or else I'm going to sit in my comfort zone. And when he said that, I was like, you know what? He's right, dude. Like I've sat in this house for since my sobriety journey started in 2017 and I just kind of like got more and more inverted. And then when COVID hit, oh my God, I didn't want to go anywhere. So like 2020 just made me like a shut in. Like I didn't want to, I didn't even want to go to the grocery store type thing. And.

And, you know, Taurus really brought me out of my shell. And these meet and greets, you guys that come to these meet and greets are helping me heal. And that's what I tell everybody when I meet them. I'm like, it's because of you guys that I'm able to do this. Because, you know, two years ago, I would have never been able to hug somebody or shake their hands, you know. So, yeah, it's definitely getting easier. And I'm telling you right now, if you have something that you're facing that is challenging,

you know, a huge fear of yours or gives you panic attacks, I'm telling you just start doing something differently. Like if you're scared to leave your house, make yourself walk around the block once a day and then that'll turn into two. Yeah. Start slow and then just build up, go for a drive, go to the store, you know, like just keep, uh,

Just keep trying to figure out ways to not let your anxiety control you. Yeah. Yeah. I'm proud of you. I'm proud of you, you son of a bitch. I didn't do anything. Yeah, you did. You lost 11 pounds, bitch. Yeah. You want to talk about that? Yeah. Yes. Tri-septide is my BFF. Listen, guys, I know I'm going to get a world of shit when I say this, but I'm hopping on the tri-septide train, too.

It's not about me. It's about you. We'll talk about me in a second. But Haley's lost 11 pounds. Mimi's lost fucking almost 40, I think. Yeah, 40 pounds. She's looking amazing. Me and Mimi's ass is like the same size. So I can say that I am inspired by these ladies that are around me. And I just... Yeah, all we eat is crumbs. All we eat is air. No, I eat a lot. But I have to on this diet that I'm on. But I, you know, I'm 44 years old and weight

It does not come off easy. I have been stalled at a certain weight since March, and it's driving me crazy. Like, I can't even lose five pounds. And you eat so clean, and you work out. It's crazy to me. So I'm just going to do a little microdosing on the old Tri-Zep.

And I'm going to let you guys know how it goes. Yeah. Sonobello loves dumb blonde listeners so much that they just made you friends and family. You're now included in their friends and family fall savings event. This is a rare event. You'll enjoy the same special savings that Sonobello doctors, nurses, and staff, friends, and family receive, but appointments are limited. So you need to schedule now.

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Is there a certain state or venue that's on your bucket list to visit? I would say that we're all really excited for Madison Square Garden. Yes. And...

Suicide Boys. Yeah. It's the only reason I'm on this tour. Literally, literally. We are going to see Suicide Boys in Boston and I am so excited. I love Suicide Boys, but I had to wait until they got sober because their music scared me before that. I was like, oh my God. I showed her some songs and she's like, it's a little scary. I'm like, this is scary. But then now their sober record, the one they just dropped. Oh my God. I love it. Like love, love, love it. So we're going to go see. I'm going to cry. I know.

I know. Haley loves suicide boards. I put that on my vision board. So that's something I can knock off my vision board. Yeah, these vision boards have been powerful this year. Yeah. Crazy. All the shit that's on our vision boards have come true. Yeah. Losing weight was one of them. Yeah. And now we're on the big T. Big T train. Yeah, big T train. All right. Yeah, so we're going to go see Suicide Boys. But I'd have to say Madison Square Garden for sure. That's like iconic AF to go and be able to watch my husband sell out that

arena is just insane and then the day after he sells out Madison Square Garden he's gonna do Saturday Night Live bro bro bro brah brah so cool dude like I cannot believe it I'm so stoked for my husband this is a childhood dream of his and there's nothing that man can't do dude I'm fucking tired of it it's like how many times do you tell somebody you're proud of them like I need to think of a new word

Let me suck your penis? I mean, I say that all the time. You know, I mean, that's nothing new to him, too. He's been hearing that for a decade now. I can't believe Jay and I have been together almost a decade. It's crazy. It's really crazy. Damn. Damn. I didn't think I was, you know, I didn't think I was like long-term material. You did it. Here you are. Here I am. I'm a missus. You are. Wow.

You are. I never knew. You're a missus. I didn't realize. But the crazy thing is we're going to be in Boston too and we want to go to Salem so bad. So bad. Haley's nickname when we go to bars is Salem. Salem and Stella. Yeah.

Yes. I love it. I fucking want to go to Salem so bad. So I was like, Haley, we can go to Salem if we don't go to Suicide Boys. And she's like, bitch, no. We're going to Suicide Boys. Absolutely not. Salem will always be there. We're trying to talk the Suicide Boys into one, coming on the podcast, but two, coming and playing at Jay's show the next day. You guys need to go message him and tell him, message them and tell them to come on. Old scrim and rubes. Yeah.

Ruby Detroit. All right, guys, we're out of here. We love you and I'll see you next week. Bye. Let's talk about our favorite fall scents. I love marshmallows. I love the smell of s'mores. I love the smell of dark chocolate. I love the smell of rain on a dreary autumn night. Not a pumpkin spice latte fan though. Sorry, ladies.

But you want to know what's not on this list? B.O. Let's face it, summer isn't the only time we get body odor. We can get just as smelly under our favorite fall sweaters. That's why I'm excited to tell you about Lume's Whole Body Deodorant for pits, privates, and beyond. As a special offer, new customers get 15% off all Lume products with our exclusive code. Use code BUNNIEXO, B-U-N-N-I-E-X-O, baby, XO.

at LumeDeodorant.com. That's L-U-M-E-D-E-O-D-O-R-A-N-T.com. You guys already know I've been preaching to you for months now. I absolutely love Lume products. And now that I'm on tour under pressure 24-7, what do I got with me? A whole case full of Lume. You bet your buttons. Lume's starter pack is perfect for new customers. It comes with a solid stick deodorant,

Cream tube deodorant, two free products of your choice like mini body wash and deodorant wipes and free shipping. As a special offer for listeners, new customers get 15% off all Lumi products with our exclusive code. And if you combine the 15% off with the already discounted starter pack, that equals over 40% off their starter pack.

Use code bunny XO, B-U-N-N-I-E XO for 15% off your first purchase at lumideodorant.com. That's code bunny XO, B-U-N-N-I-E XO at L-U-M-E-D-E-O-D-O-R-A-N-T.com.