Ask, Tell, Confess: Getting Whacked Off By Grandma
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Welcome to the land. Oh, you threw me off. That was a good one. Wow, the switch up. I went a little bit higher. I had my fingers ready. A little bit higher. A little bit higher octave too. A little staccato. Is that what it's called?

look at Haley with the big words that was in band I love that staccato is that what it's called when it goes a little higher no when you just like oh cut it off a staccato yeah I feel like the Italians always make everything so much more difficult staccato you know instead of just stick

Well, fancy seeing you guys here. Oh man, it's been a while guys. It's been a good like 12 hours. I think we just all need to just move in together at this point. That's what you're trying to do. It just keeps going. We're building everyone houses guys. We got the 500 acres man. We are just building everybody houses. That way we just have to walk over to each other's houses. I mean, hey, that's kind of nice. Yeah, that would be great.

I love it. Well, let's get into Ask Tuck and Fest. We've got three of us here, so we'll do two questions each. Let's go, guys. Who wants to go first? Me. I think this one needs to go first. All right. So this one.

They had to send it in the DMs because she said, my fiance, after six years of dating, we love a grand old spicy time in the bedroom. Our sex life is no kind of boring. Well, after doing so much over the years, one day I was messing with him and I told him I wanted to eat his ass. Okay. Well, after months of joking around and fucking with him one night after a night out of drinking, he was like, fine, go ahead if you really want. So

So I took my shot and did it after hounding him for months. He had dried poop stuck in his hairy asshole and it ended up in my mouth and not appear. Hold on. I'm gagging. Hold it. Okay.

Okay. Out of pure embarrassment for me and him, I just shut the fuck up and did my thing as nasty as that sounds, disgusting at the time, and wanted to bleach my face after, but we joke about it, and now I officially call him Dingleberry. Did she swallow it? Bro, she said I wanted to bleach my face after. Okay. All right, there's so much here to unpack. So, men, if you're going to have somebody eat your ass...

At least baby wipe the motherfucker. If you're not going to fucking... Give it a dude wipe? Yeah, if you're not going to take a shower before getting your ass ate...

Give it a little wipey wipe with the dipey dipe. Okay? Like, let's not have doo-doo balls encrusted in your fucking ass hairs and then make your fucking significant other have to eat that. Imagine her spitting them out like... Bitch. When you get a piece of pepper stuck in your teeth. Oh, God.

Listen, listen, and listen, bitch, you're a fucking, listen, girl, you are a savage to be able to do that. That is just absolutely incomprehensible.

I could never. If there was doo-doo balls, I'm not doing it, dude. No. I would be like, go hop your ass in the shower right now, and then I'll go, hey, baby, let's have a shower, and then eat his ass in the shower. Yeah. You know, like, I'm sorry. There's a line that has to be done, because you can get sick. You've got to eat buttholes, though. Wipe your butthole better. Why not? Have you ever had your butthole ate? No, I don't like that. Really? You don't like anything. You are so petty. That's where you should be.

shit guys yeah but after a fresh clean shower yeah still it's tongue punch my fart box i mean don't knock until you try it i don't want to i've already had bad experiences with assholes remember what happened like ouch

Oh, yeah. Oh, I mean, listen. At least it was my couch and not my mouth, though. But if he went, your ass isn't like that. It's not doo-doo brown. No. That dude fucking obviously didn't wipe. That dude clearly. Yeah. All right. Well, that girl was a fucking trooper, dude. I'm telling you right now. I was coming in hot with that one, guys. Oh, God. Go ahead, Haley. Is that it? Are we done now? Go ahead, Haley. You're next. Oh, shit. Are you struggling to close deals?

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I think we're going to turn up a notch in 2025. We're going to really double down on this podcast and try to have new ways to get it out there in innovative ways. So I think we're going to start like a kick or a twitch and do like once a week live podcasts.

Yeah, we're going to start streaming just once a month, you know, or once a week. I'm sorry. Maybe we'll start out once a month. See how the first one does. And then we'll go from there. Up it. Yeah. But we'll see. But as far as like guests. No, I know.

probably Joyce Myers or like, you know, just any, I mean, now that that's happened, it's just like, I just want, you know, anybody who feels comfortable to tell their story here and consider this podcast, a safe space to come on and just tell their story. So, I mean, I had Dolly on what more I'm done. I'm retiring guys. That's what I was so scared of. I, you guys genuine fear was at the end of it, her being like, okay, I quit. Yeah.

- I'm done guys. - I'm done guys, sorry. Mimi's taking over now. Yeah, no, I just, you don't top Dolly Parton, dude. There's no way to top her. She is a fucking God and there's just nothing you can do to top that. - It was like sitting in front of a saint. - I didn't know so many people had so many opinions about Joyce Meyer. When I said that Joyce Meyer's was my other interview I loved on my backup account, my backup TikTok account,

People were like upset. And I'm like, how can you be upset about a woman who preaches the word of God? Is there a controversy behind? I don't know if there is. I've never known. I just know that Joyce Myers has been through some shit.

And she uses her life to help and lift people up. And she doesn't try to act perfect. She tells people like, hey, man, I was a piece of shit before. And I was miserable. And I tried to make everybody around me miserable. And like, you know, like she's really honest about like her journey in life. So that's what I've always respected about her. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. I don't know. I have no idea. I still don't know her. Huh? Don't know her. I got to send you one of her sermons to listen to.

She's so uplifting. So yeah, I will send you a Joyce Meyers podcast just so that you can get on the bandwagon too. Steph is asking, what's the one thing you all get weird about when it comes to sex? And there's absolutely no chance of it happening in the bedroom. And also what's the most surprising thing you've masturbated with? With? Yeah.

I think I'm pretty normal. I don't think I've masturbated with anything crazy. I'm very specific in my masturbation. It has to vibrate. I'm not just over here flicking the bean with my fingernails. Yeah, no, I can't do that. I can't do it. Just strumming the banjo. I saw a TikTok the other day where Nail Tick was like, when you're filing down her acrylics and you all of a sudden can like smell where she's been. I was like, I swear. I was like,

Wow. Yeah. We got to ask Gina if that's a real thing. Yeah. That's insane. Yeah. I can't, I need something that vibrates. I'm not, there's no way I'm going to be fucking DJ scratch and sniff. I can't do it, dude. There's no, could you imagine that?

I can't do it, dude. No. Dude, could you imagine? I never thought about like vagina smell on acrylics. Haley, is there anything weird you've masturbated with? No. Yeah. I don't think there's anything. I didn't even start until I was like 19. I didn't have my first orgasm until I was in my 20s. Oh. Yeah. The first time I ever had an orgasm was with a vibrator.

I hear that a lot with women. Men can't find it. Men don't know what they're doing. They never do. Sorry, Jaime. They think they do. Sorry, Jaime. They think they do. I still haven't found it. I'm still looking for it.

Yeah. I'm still looking. Yeah. Well, obviously you're doing all right. Cause you got a hot fucking girlfriend. So obviously you could find the button a time or two. Is there anything that's off limits in the bedroom for you guys? Clearly hers is butthole. No, Haley's got a whole list of shit that she doesn't like to do. Yeah. Yeah. You don't think she doesn't want to be cuddled. She doesn't want to be kissed. She doesn't want anything, dude. Like I really don't enjoy it at all.

I really don't. If I could not have sex or anything the rest of my life, I would be fine. I feel like you just haven't found that person who meets your... No. Who makes you feel comfortable and makes you feel beautiful. I don't want it. Yes, you do. Stop saying that. You're speaking that into your life, though. Words are spells. Because I don't want it. You were at his house the other day. Clearly, you wanted it. I was drunk. Exactly. Have you ever seen me at someone's house sober? No. No.

clearly you is like you like it so it's like it becomes a little sex kitten when she drinks yeah she gets this little look in her eye i don't want anything her little eyes her little eyelashes back because then you have to wake up and do it sober every day and just be with them they're still there oh she hasn't found that person who makes part of your life that's like your best friend you gotta find somebody who's your homie i love living alone

You'll get there. Yeah, she will. It's going to sweep you off your feet when you least expect it. Mimi, what's off limits for you in the bedroom? Like on myself or like both. No, I just like my husband will not let me see his asshole. We know that. But that's off limits for you. No, that's why we touch it. What will you not do?

I won't. I don't eat butthole. That's just not going to happen. I want to see it. But you'll get your ass ate. Oh, for sure. I don't want to see it. For sure. After a good like bath or a shower or something. For sure. Let's go. I don't know if I have anything that's off limits in the bedroom. I would probably just say anything that has to do with pooping or peeing. Yeah. You're not pooping on me. Yeah.

Like you're not pooping on me. You're not peeing on me unless we're in the shower. You can pee on me in the shower. I'm fine with that. When I broke Jason's dick that one time, I thought he was peeing on me and I came up angry. Like I literally was like, you are doing fucking what? And then I like, really? He's like stark white. I was so mad. I legit thought, cause it was warm. Just like pouring out on me.

And I was like, you're fucking peeing on me right now. Like when did? No, absolutely fucking not. It's just gushing blood. Yeah. And then I saw how white he was and he's just looking at me and I looked down and I was like, oh my fucking God. Just blood everywhere on the sheets. Terrible. Yeah. Hey, Prime members. Have you heard? You can listen to your favorite podcast ad free. Good.

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Credit Karma is your evolved financial assistant, making managing your finances simpler and more tailored to you. Join us at creditkarma.com to start your personalized financial journey today and continue to grow with our innovations. Credit Karma, evolve your finances. Yeah, I mean, I don't think there's anything. I'm pretty open, so. Yeah, just like I don't love a lot of like bodily fluid kind of stuff. Yeah, I'm not. I'm good with that, too. Not gargling with cum on a regular basis. Yeah. Yeah.

All right. Next question. What is the best financial decision you made early on in your career? Financial decision was investing in myself. That's the best thing you could say. Yeah, for sure. That's the best thing you could ever do. Invest in yourself. Do not wait for somebody to invest in you because nobody's going to come save you. You need to invest in yourself and believe in yourself. Even when people tell you, you can't do it. You've always had your own shit and people don't realize we didn't go out like renting podcast studios. No.

But he was quickly to be like, this is mine. Yeah. And like, I'm not going to just go rent a place for a year and that kind of, you know, like you literally were like, this is my equipment. This is my camera. This is my team. This is my production company. Yeah. No, I, I just genuinely believe that if you build it, they will come. And it doesn't matter if you've got 50 listeners. Cause that 50 listeners can turn into 50,000, you know, very quickly. And I just think that, you know,

nobody can take what is yours and if you invest in yourself nobody can take that away from you and so i used my home money from only fans to really fund this podcast and like get it off the ground and you know it was the best thing i ever did so yeah what about you guys a good question that's a good one what did you do damsel in distress

- Don't ask me for financial advice. - I'm like, I make bad financial decisions. - I do. - But you know what, I did too when I was your age. I did too. I genuinely feel like in high schools, they should teach a fucking credit and business class and teach you how to like,

balance a checking account save money yeah i've never taught any of that yeah like how to purchase your first home like i literally had a good credit scores yeah how to have a decent credit score yeah like i feel like they should teach all of that in high school and they don't it's it's mind-boggling to me my financial was that i always invested in myself like i never rent things i don't believe in renting things i believe in like owning so it's like you know

When me and Jason first met, I was like, we're buying. Why would we go rent? Like, yeah, it's our money. And then we can just invest it in ourselves. I just had this conversation with Jaime the other day. Him and I were going back and forth about it because Jaime wants to buy a house. And I'm like, dude, get you your own home because then you're building equity on that home and you're investing in yourself. Yeah. And then you can always use that later on to like,

have growth if you want investment properties yeah take out like a HELOC on your home and you can go buy an investment property yeah and it's fun whenever you start being able to like invest in stuff like that and like really like start flipping stuff that's when it starts getting fun

I love it. Yeah. Go ahead, memes. Okay, this one's a confession. It says, please keep my name anonymous. Uh-oh. This is going to be good. This has been kept in my vault for years, she said. I saw my boyfriend's dad getting a handjob from my man's grandma, his dad's mother-in-law. It's a sight I'll never unsee or forget when I'm around him or her. She's in her mid-80s with Parkinson's. Aww.

- Is... What happened? What did he do? - That's what I was about to say though. Is she sure that's what was happening? Because that's elder abuse.

That's elder abuse. But people with Parkinson's are fully aware. They just shake a thousand percent. Are they? Okay. Parkinson's is just a neuron like mishap to where it causes you to shake. You are fully there. I need more information. Where was this? Is he married? Is he single? Is this the first time? Yeah. I don't feel like that's the first time. Were they just at Thanksgiving dinner and she whipped it out and then just fucking...

Whacking under the table. I need more details before I can even make a real statement on this because that's insane. Dude, they came out crazy. This Aztel confessed. Yeah. And these were all in the DMs. Like people were like, I got stuff to say. Keep sending the DM one.

Yeah, we love the juiciest ones. The DM ones are juicy, but we'll circle back to that story because we need more information. DM us the rest of that story, please. Yeah, like where was it? Is he married? Because if he's married and he's getting whacked off by the grandma, then that's fucked up. You know, like that's gross. Is grandma all there? I still think it's fucked up even if he isn't married. Literally, is grandma all there though? I mean, everybody, you know, we don't yuck anybody's yum, so maybe he likes older women, you know, but it's like,

you know, is grandma all there? If not, then that's elder abuse. Have you, if you haven't told anybody and she's not all there, you need to tell somebody. Oh, I would hope she did. It doesn't hurt somebody else. You know, like there's just so many things that I, we can't even comment on cause we don't know. So.

We need the rest of the story and we're going to circle back next. Yeah. Was this on a holiday? Like, what are we doing? What day of the week was this? You just really got it. Okay. Question. Bunny, did you ever fall in love with a trick or a pimp if you had one? If so, what was that experience like? If not, how'd you separate your work from your feelings? That's actually a really good question. Yeah. No, it's a great question. And yeah,

You know, I've spoken about this a lot and I talk about it in my book too that's coming out, but I never had a pimp.

I always have done things independently. I did not see the point of working my ass off, literally. Again, you had your own shit. Yeah, and just to give it to a man who couldn't handle his finances better than me. No shade to the girls who have had pimps. I understand that that's a way of life. I have a lot of girlfriends who have P's in Vegas, and they're some of the best women that I've ever met. This message is sponsored by Greenlight.

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So yeah, no, I never had a pimp. I personally have never been able to fall in love with a trick because I can't get past the point of seeing them pay for a hooker. And even though I was the hooker that they were paying, I still don't want somebody I love to be a trick. That is the biggest turnoff for me. Like it grosses me out to no end.

And it's just because it takes a certain type of man to trick on a woman. They all have the same personality. And being in the business for as long as I was, I was able to see who's a trick and who's not, you know? Yeah. And it's just something that turns me off. It's like it's like if you look at a guy and he's super beta or a guy that's super alpha, which one are you going to go for? Some girls like really beta dudes. I don't. I like super alpha dudes. Some girls don't.

in the industry have fallen in love with tricks. I have a friend right now who is literally booed up with one of her tricks and they've been together for a decade and I love both of them. It's just, you know, it's a different lifestyle. And the way that I kept things separated was I never wanted to marry for money ever. My dad raised me to marry somebody for money and I wanted to do the opposite of what Bill Carter taught me, you know, and I wanted to have love on my own and

you know people used to always say you could marry whoever you want that's why when people call me a gold digger I laugh because it's like do you not think I could have married somebody else that fucking had way more money than my husband did especially when I first met him and does like there's just so many opportunities that I had to marry for money and I always turn them down and I know my sugar some of my sugar daddies listen to my shit and because they still DM me and shit all the time and email me I

I know you guys are listening to this. Yeah, no, they email me too. I know some of you motherfuckers are listening to this going, yep, she's telling the truth because there are so many of them that tried to marry me. And I was like, absolutely not. It's just something that was inside of me that I just never. So what's the definition of a trick? Is trick just someone who pays for? A trick is a John. So it's somebody that you, you go and you turn a trick. So you are going to see a client.

They're the guys that spend money on girls. So that's how you get the definition being a trick is that you paid for a service. Yeah. You turn a trick. Yeah. Absolutely. But yeah, no shade to any of the girls who have, you know, married their tricks or had these because, you know, I love all my girls in the industry. And as long as you're not being hurt and you're not being trafficked, go ahead, girl, make that money, make that money, honey. Yeah.

And on that note, we will go ahead and head on out and go fucking relax before we got to shoot this music video. Yep. Let's go. I'll let you guys sign out today. Bye-bye. Bye. Toodaloo, motherfuckers. See you toots. Bye.