2023: Recap
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What's up guys? Don't forget to sub to Patreon so that you can see the visuals because not only do we have episodes of the podcast, we have exclusive content that nobody else sees on any other apps, behind the scenes, photo shoots, and we're dropping a whole bunch of surprising stuff this year. So if you guys don't want to miss out and you want to be the first to know, go over to our Patreon, www.dumbblondunrated.com. Love ya!

What's up guys? I just wanted to come on here and thank you guys so much for an amazing season. It's because of all of you that all of this is happening and I could not be more grateful. Here are some of my favorite moments from this year. Do I dare call you guys the villains of TikTok or what would be a good word to describe you guys, Kristen and Whitney?

I think villain is a great thing. I'll go with that. My dog's name is villain. Okay. There's nothing wrong with being a villain. Oh, no. I find absolutely nothing wrong with that. My dad passed away when I was 12. Aw. But I'm really close to my mom now. I'm sorry to hear that. My mom just passed away last week. I couldn't imagine going through that at 12. That would suck. It's really hard. Yeah. Yeah.

Especially I mean like nowadays society and like boys they don't know how to treat women It's hard to grow up without a dad to show you how you should be treated I feel for you guys having to date in this era because I thought boys men Whatever you want to call them or fuck boys when I was growing up You guys are like in the microwave era where everything's replaceable. Everybody wants everything

thing right now. It's social media. Social media. Everybody looks up to this like huge, I mean, someone could be prettier, nicer, funnier, have more money, have more followers. There's always more options. They'll know, they'll never know what they have. They just constantly want to look for more. I mean, like, I mean, girls do it too. It's harder for us. Do you have people who try to date you guys for your social media presence? Yes. But we can tell who. You can tell. How do you tell? What are the signs? They're saying that we had people signing NDAs to hang out with

I have bitches sign NDAs to hook up with my husband and I so there's nothing wrong with that. Oh, they think they're all that. They think they're famous. We don't think we're famous, but we definitely know we have a name. I have a page of 23,000 people that completely shit on me. I know I'm known. How does that make you guys feel to know that these people are literally tearing you apart and just saying the meanest things lying outright because they've done it to me too. You guys are babies, you know, like when I was 21, I was like fucking Lindsay Lohan. I was snorting fucking eight balls of cocaine off strippers asses.

I was fucking robbing motherfuckers for their money. Like I was doing crazy shit. You guys are fucking kids. Like all these people that are fucking talking shit about you guys. What were they doing at 21? Sad. I would wish no one else to go through it. I'm glad me and Whitney are the ones that get it because we really can laugh it off. Anyone believes it or not. But I've been in the position where I have...

try to take my own life because I was bullied really bad in high school, but nothing will compare to how I'm being bullied now. That website is a reflection of how those people feel inside. My baby girl is in the house. Jade Amber, what the fuck is that, baby? Hi. Sorry, mom's sitting right here and I'm just cussing left and right. She does too. It's okay. So I was in Charlotte and I was working at Hooters, but then I got fired one day. Oh no. Why? Because...

- How do you get fired from Hooters? - I know, it sucks because like Hooters was following me on TikTok and everything. Like we were having conversations like dang, what happened? Hooters of America had called Hooters and I was the one that answered the phone like, "Hello, this is Hooters of Charlotte. "Can I speak to the manager on duty?" So I give them the phone. I'm like bartending and then I'm just starting to think like what?

Am I in trouble? There was this video that I had posted about this customer. He was just being very snarky, very like rude. Not the snarky. Oh, I hate that word. It was something about the tipping and he was just being an asshole basically. Right. So I made a video about it. The reason why I got fired is because I was in my Hooters uniform and I was talking about a situation which was fine until I called him a dick and that's

That's what got me fired. They were just looking for a reason. Which is so crazy to me because I've been a Hooters advocate since day one. I made videos about how to get hired at Hooters. Like I was a Hooters girl like advocate, seriously. I'm so excited to have Prince. And a lot of people ask me like, where did you get Prince's name from? It's like when you're picking out baby names, you hear something that was like somebody you knew. You're like,

No. I hate when people name babies like grown ass men name like Walt. This is my son, Walt. You had nine months, you know, and that's what you fucking came up with. And you're stuck with that for the rest. No offense to people named Walt. Okay. I know. No offense to people named Walt, but come on. You don't want to see a little nine month old named Walt, you know?

This is fucking weird. That's what I'm saying. Or Harold. You know? Like, be so brutal. That's weird. We were at Walmart and there was this girl. Oh, like, I know her from church or whatever. I was like, oh, why don't you go say hi? Because, like, I didn't care. Like, if you know her from church, like, that's a friend. Like, go say hey. Like, don't be weird. He was like, no, I think it'll be weird if I say something, whatever. He started acting really weird, which is what he always did when he was, like, talking to other women online. And one time he was in the shower.

And I did what like would like to say a lot of girls do, but some probably don't. I went on his phone. Every bitch in America has gone through their man's phone. And if they said they don't, they're a fucking liar. I can't with the girls who are like, I don't do that. I go through my man's phone still. And we're married seven years. And I love that motherfucker. And I know he's never going to fucking hurt me again like he did. So it's like, fucking, I still will go through his phone. Anytime. I'll fucking pico.

over water in bed, you know? Like I don't care. There's no shame in that. Like we're females, we're curious. It's just what we do. - He was talking to the girl on Snapchat and I like clicked on it. - Ugh, I hate Snapchat. - And she had like messaged him and she was like, "We have TikTok's favorite coffee house couple in the house. I'm so excited. Erica and Shane, how are you guys doing baby? - Doing good. How you doing? - I'm good. You guys finally made it here. How deep did your addiction get?

It went pretty bad. It turned out my drug of choice was meth. I used to smoke it. See, I used to snort it. The burn I was all about. Not me. I wanted to fucking fly like a kite. No, no. Twist and turn. I knew it was bad. I'll never forget it. I just told Terry. She works with us at our cafe. I just told her this story the other day. I'll never forget it. Towards the end of my reign...

right before I made the call that I was done and I wanted some help. I didn't know what that looked like, but I knew I needed help. - You needed help, yeah. - I'll never forget sitting there in this motherfucking bathroom at this hotel with a line of dope in front of me. And every, oh, it gets me so emotional every time I talk about it because every ounce of me didn't want to, but I did.

And that was when I realized like, I don't, this isn't a choice for me. This isn't like, I know this is wrong and I'm not going to do it. It had gotten to the point where I didn't have a choice. I didn't want to do it. But at the same time, you're doing it. Right. You know, and the willpower just isn't there. And I'll never forget that same night. I called my dad from the hotel room.

I didn't have a pot to piss in. I didn't have no license. I didn't have no car, no money, no phone, nothing. I lost absolutely fucking everything. I called him and he was like, well, you know, your mom said that we can put you in a hotel room tonight and then you can go to rehab tomorrow. Otherwise, we'll put you in a hotel room tonight and then we just...

like we got part ways we're sorry but like we can't do this anymore i had broke into their house i had stole from them um i had stole from my siblings just strung out just doing i mean you're not you oh no especially meth meth is like it changes your whole brain meth and xanax are two drugs and i used to love mixing them it's really unsafe let's not do that i used

do eight balls of cocaine and come down with bars of xanax dude yeah people are like you can't overdose on xanax i'm like yes you can yes you can and your heart can stop if you mix uppers with downers and they also don't really tell you about that these days either and i don't know why today we're doing something a little different i have one of my dear sweet friends dempsey in the house what's up baby what's up

So aggressive. It was kind of hot. I don't ever get to see that side of them. I need to get some frustration out. Wait, what are we allowed to tell people about cat daddy right now? Because everybody's in for everybody who wants to know Todd is cat daddy. That's what I call him. You know, I'll give him full disclosure. That man is such an easygoing. Believe it or not, I've known cat and people are going to be surprised by this.

I've known that man since fucking shrimp BJ. It was since my whole internet fiasco breakup where I was like, first of all, why is his name shrimp BJ? That doesn't sound enticing. He's just a fucking shrimp bottom of the sea cockroach. Was his wieners and all? No. I've had that. Porquito. Porquito. Porquito. Yeah.

No, but I just, I don't know what it is. Everybody's obsessed with, I don't want to say obsessed, but my love life, dating. I look at it like sex in the city. I mean, it's fun. I'm young. I'm a single mom. Like, I'm just dating, you know, like having fun. Live it up. But this one takes the motherfucking cake. Oh, who would call me? I don't know.

I told Demps last night when we were texting, I was like, every time I see you with Cat Daddy, it reminds me of like pixie dust that's getting sprinkled around everywhere because you can just see the energy between you guys. He just lets me do my thing. Like we went to Applebee's. I was like, hold on, let me put on my mullet. And he loved it so much. And he still wants to fuck you even.

I asked him, I was like, would you bend me over backwards with that mullet on? He was like, you have no idea. Okay, so when you guys are ready to make the OF content, Mimi and I will set it up and we'll fucking give you guys plots for each one of your videos. Today, I have one of the more controversial TikTok stars sitting on my couch and I am so excited to go down the rabbit hole with her. Hawk is in the house, baby. What's up? Hey.

How are you doing? Thriving. How are you? Baby, I am living. Blessed and living. I'm so happy you're here. Thank you for having me. How old were you when you left him? I left him this September after she was born. She was born in February. So the reason that I had left him was I got this... I had gotten this message from some random follower. And...

It was like in detail what they were going to do to me. And like they involved my daughter. And like they talked about like raping me and like just like the ways that they would murder me while my daughter would like cry out my name. Like it was the sickest thing I've ever received. So I quit. I called my mom.

I said, mom, I am going to die. I am going to die. Like if you don't pick me up. And she did. Who was it? You never found out who it was? It was just somebody he was affiliated with or just like a crazy fan. I think it was a crazy fan. Wow. So and I like I didn't want to go to the cops because I'm like, I make, you know, yeah, I make explicit content. They're just going to tell me it's my fucking fault. Yeah, I knew better.

But I was scared for my fucking life. So I left.

And he and I have a great relationship now. We're both clean and sober. Yeah. And he takes her, you know, almost every weekend now. And he's a great fucking dad. He really is. I love to hear that. We just weren't good together. Yeah. And that's okay. It was probably very passionate. Most passionate relationships are extremely toxic. Yeah. I feel like you can't have health and growth in a relationship. Yeah. And passion. Like it's, you have to pick, it's like one or the other, you know, like it's,

Yeah. Either get your back banged out and fucking argue all the time or fucking be straight and narrow. And, you know, like I just. Yeah. Yeah. When we first met, it was like a fucking fairy tale. Like everything seemed too good to be true. And like that's because you guys trauma bonded and love bombed each other. I'm sure. I'm like so excited to dive into your story because I get to see you online and like you're just like so positive, always making me laugh, always coming up with these like quotes and shit that you have. And.

I just love it. So I'm really excited to just dive deep into your story. How are you? I'm good. Yeah. It's great to see you. Thanks for having me here. Are you good though? Cause you had, let's just, you know, she was my mom's sister. She was your mom's sister. She was their blood sisters. Uh, she had a several siblings.

But she, she talked my mom into going to this, um, this church meeting thing. She said, this man's got healing hands. He's known to heal people. You got to come. Is this after she was sick? This is while she was sick. While she was sick, okay. And, I mean, she even told my Aunt Karen, she was like, Karen, I can barely walk. Karen was like, I don't care. We'll carry you in the church. Hmm.

made a real big deal out of it. I'll never forget it. It was the most powerful moment in my entire life because I thought I was losing my mom. It was all starting to come together for me. It's got to be traumatic at five or six years old. That's she was everything. I didn't have a dad, so I didn't have nothing else. That's your mama, man. We went to this church situation. His name was Jesse to plan us. I don't know if you ever heard of him. He's a very famous in the whole Christian thing. Um,

he called her out he walked down the aisle he said lord's gonna heal you tonight and he i got chills he got her up he said in the name of jesus you stand up right now and she stood up that was one of the first times i ever saw my mom stand up all by herself oh my god calls her out in the middle of the ass where do you bunny this is 100 true i love puts his hands on her starts praying and ah la la la right yeah it's speaking in tongues right and the next thing you know she falls out

I'm like, he killed her. That's it. Oh, no. Well, that's it's over. And, you know, a couple of minutes later, she got up and started running up and down the aisles of the church. Holy shit. Yeah. That's like shit you only fucking hear about. Like, you know, it happened like the Benny Hens and all that stuff. You know, I grew up with all that stuff around me, too, when my dad decided to stop being a rock star and wanted to go fucking full fledged Bible thumper.

So that's like stuff that you just like see on TV, but you actually got to see that with your own eyes. It was crazy shit I've ever seen in my life. Does that make you a believer now? It did for a long time. And I was really cemented in my belief because I'm like, God showed me a miracle. It would be like the worst form of blasphemy to just ignore him after this. Like he literally showed me a miracle, but I got to.

it's hard for me. That's a, the Christianity thing is real hard subject for me because it was forced upon me, you know, so much throughout my life. And I'm gay, obviously. I don't know if you guys knew that. I didn't know. I had no idea. I know. I know. It's weird. Don't tell nobody. We'll get into that. Did you always know that you were gay? I did. Okay. So you were just born and just like women. I didn't know what it meant. I just knew that I was not interested in the boys at all. Yeah. And I just, I felt really uncomfortable, but excited when I looked at

- Right. - Christy Howard in the house. What's up baby, how are you? - Hi.

I love that. I had to get that out of the way. It is so iconic. I love that because I do that too. We were doing that last year with the Why Is It Spicy? Like we were so fucking, that was like our jam. Yeah. So when I heard, when I stumbled upon one of your TikToks and I heard you do it, I was like, this is my fucking people right here. And my, right when I finished, my dad, that's when my dad called me and gave me the phone call that she passed away. And it was literally so, five days, I hadn't even been there a full week. The first day of my job in this place. And my dad's like, you need to get on a plane and come home. And I'm like,

How am I supposed to get there by myself? I, how do I, what, what do I pack? What do I do? I like, I just, it was traumatizing. And I sat for like 12 hours straight in my room in Nashville and finally

And finally... You froze. Yeah. And I had no one come, you know, I didn't want them to come to me. But it's like if she were alive, she'd be the one that'd come to me and help me get my stuff together to go. So it was just so weird. What did she pass away from? Was it an overdose? She overdosed. I'm fentanyl. But like that bitch was strong. Like she literally could take a lot. And I just, you know, she did heroin. So when someone does heroin, you...

you know and they're active you know there's a chance yeah and all the time but in my head my sister Kat Howard was never gonna die like I knew I wasn't stupid I knew that that's what happened but you just really don't actually think it's gonna happen to like you and your family so I was just convinced like dude stop because she'd be like I'm so and so days clean and

And you just believe that and then it's just never, it really never ends. But then she passed away in the rehab facility or would the day already release? Oh, it was a whole thing. She was in a detox center. Wow. And I had girls reach out to me and tell me the full story after she passed because we only knew.

Nobody was helping us at all. And my mom was like batshit crazy, like getting a detective. Like we need to get to the bottom of this. Why did the deaths in South Florida? They just kind of walk over them like they're nothing. Right. Especially like having to do with drugs. I hate that because I feel like people who are addicts don't deserve justice. We're like, well, what? Where was she? What was the... Did anybody do save her? What...

nobody was telling us anything it was so weird and so what happens was the detox center kicked her out but didn't like tell my parents which I guess when she's 24 they don't or yeah 24 I guess you don't have to notify the parents but my parents were the ones like paying for her to be there so it's like wow you know whatever so they apparently this this place she got caught using um I think she like went out like to buy Halloween decorations and got some stuff and she

She got caught and one of the girls in there who called me after she died and explained I'd never met this girl before she told me like Christy I knew something wasn't right like her lips were purple and they sent her out of there they bought her a lift and they sent her to

from a rehab to a detox center. And they bought it for her and put her in that car with her lips blue and everything. She died in the car on the way to a new place. I think you guys are just so fucking adorable. I love what you guys represent and I love what you do. Rhea and Amber Demire. Did I say it right? Thanks for having us. Yes, perfect. You said it perfect. Yay for me, yay for me. What's up, guys? What are you guys doing out here? They had a man picked out for you already? It was arranged. My cousins knew somebody and they just told my mom about it. Oh, he's a good guy. Great family, yada, yada.

And they showed me a picture and I told my mom, I was like, absolutely not. I was like, hell no. You know, I'm like, that's absolutely not even just the guy who's definitely not my type either. It's like you're like still in high school. You're not even processing like, hey, I'm going to go be a wife and have kids. And like, you're supposed to be wanting to go off to college. Yeah, I didn't get to, I didn't even get to processing.

First of all, being gay and then being shown this guy, you're like... Yeah, and I was like, hell no. Did you have girlfriends through high school secretly? Yeah, so people in high school had ideas that I had. I was interested, but...

but I didn't really get, my parents weren't involved in my school stuff. You know how parents do get involved with, and no parents have like, my parents never got involved with anything. They were always working. So I never, they never. - So you have kind of like a different life at school. - Yeah. - But her sister knew about it. - My sister did. She was always supportive. - Oh, that's good.

So where was it? So then you met him at McDonald's. No, I did not meet him at McDonald's. What the hell? Where was it? Applebee's? No, let me... But before that, I said no and my father came downstairs and I remember he said, you're going to go...

And he threatened me. He pretty much was like, I'm going to beat your ass. You're going, you have no choice until this day. He'll tell you he had no involvement in that, but he absolutely had involvement in it. Don't you love how our parents gas? No, they always gas. Motherfucker. Always. And we're into foster care at 12, I believe. Um,

And I started just rebelling horribly. Oh, yeah. Absolutely. Like, with drugs, sex, like, all of it. At 12? At 12. Wow. Yeah. And, I mean, all my friends were doing it. Right. So, like, I wanted somewhere to fit in. Yeah. And that's how I fit in with them. The outcasts always accept. And I was just numbing. You know, it gave me – I was drunk off of – we used to drink, like –

moonshine like rubbing alcohol yeah at 12 years old like falling downstairs like but even younger the first time I got drunk was eight years old with my sister because she was she'd have to bring me to every party she would go to eight years old eight years old you're drinking at eight years old wasted

That is insane. She had no guidance, clearly. I was raising myself. When I say that, I truly did it. The internet spoke and I listened. Miss Gabby Egan is in the motherfucking house, baby. What's up? I'm here. I was late. I was 30 minutes late. And I'm glad that I'm here, though. Thank you for having me on. I've been on a path of, like, I feel like unstable relationships since then. And, like, literally, like, I don't know what my problem is. But, yeah. Well, maybe childhood trauma. Yeah.

You know that you got to work through. Yeah. And you know, what's crazy is like whenever I say like, oh, I have childhood trauma. My parents are like, there's no, you can't have trauma. You can have the most perfect life and you're still going to have some sort of trauma. Everybody has it. If I can, you know, we're not minimizing, maximizing anybody's trauma. It doesn't matter where you came from. Shit's fucked up. The world's fucked up. Yeah. Shit happens. So.

You know, it's not a bad thing. It's just shit you got to work through. It's just, like, stuff that happened. And, yeah, that's why, like, you know, when I talk about my issues and stuff, like, with my parents, I feel like when I'm talking about things or, like, feelings that I'm having, they always think that I'm trying to, like, blame them for something. And it's like, no, I'm not trying to blame you. I'm just, like, reflecting on this because, like, for some reason, it's a thought that keeps coming up, you know? And for me, like, I like to talk about, like...

if something's in my head, like I gotta get it out or else I'm going to go crazy. Yeah. Um, so yeah, I do think that like, if you're not in therapy, everybody should go to therapy. Yeah. You know, totally. Everyone should go. Even if you don't have issues. Absolutely. I agree. We got a little trouble in the studio. Listen, man.

I'm just a party planner. Who the fuck is just in time? How you doing? What are you doing, baby? Did you ever go through a phase where you had fucking corn rolls? No. Okay. No, I did. I bust my husband's ass. I've seen struggles. Struggle got into corn rolls. I know he looks back. So did daddy. So did my husband. Yeah, I know they look back like, oh,

man no you know what jay embraces it what did you think what was your initial reaction to the cornrows i would have never dated him i hated it i was like bro no like never do that again buddy so i love we stan a king who byobs what is this right here what are you drinking oh michael jordan's tequila michael like the fucking michael jordan yeah he's got a his own tequila and it's just it's so far that is awesome no i'm sober one

No, no one's drinking. No, go ahead. No, I love it. You feel like an alcoholic even more, man. No, I love it. Are you kidding me? Do you know who I'm married to? Like, please. He drinks on any day that ends in Y. Does it ever bother you being referred to as Matt Hardy's wife? Being an adult has its high points. Like, you can eat ice cream for dinner anytime, or if you want to stay up all night, you can. But it's not always fun.

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I get it to an extent. He's the more famous one, but it really does discredit literally everything I've ever done in my life. All the cool shit that I've ever done. It was before I met him, really. And there's a hundred different lifetimes that I feel like I've lived before I met him. And all that is just null and void. No one cares. Once you're with him, you're just like, Matt Hardy's wife, that's it. That's your whole personality. There's nothing else special about you. I get it, but at the same time, I'm like...

Just fuck me, I guess. I'm like, well, what am I, top level here? Let's rewind it back real quick before we start talking about your wrestling. And let's talk about this child bride thing. We cannot just skip over that. I always do, though. I drop it every now and then. And then I keep moving. Yeah, that's trauma. It's a long story, bro. Well, we're ready. So everybody get your coffee. Get your fucking crumpets and tea. We are sitting down right now. It's tea time.

Okay. All right. Child ride. So how old were you? I was 16, technically. The whole thing started when I was 15. But I was, you know, I want to say like problem child, but when I look back at it, like was I really like, I was sort of in the...

foster care system for a minute i was in the troubled teen industry which like you know i don't know if you guys seen like that paris hilton interview that she did yeah speaking out it was literally that it was one of those places did you just start getting into trouble what was the i mean it wasn't even trouble i wasn't like i wasn't on drugs i wasn't like you know out here robbing people i wasn't rebellious i feel like i was just a regular ass teenager the way you would expect teenagers to be right my mom was really crazy so she was just i don't know she had me really

I don't want to say really old, but she had me at like 41, which in the 80s is like miracle baby. You know, nowadays it ain't nothing. But back then it was a big deal. I've got Priscilla Block in the house, baby. Finally. I know. Finally. We've been like trying to make this happen. And, you know, life's busy. No, bitch, you are busy. OK, like I thought my husband was busy. You're always busy. Like, are you touring right now? Like what is I'm kind of doing it all.

Today is like my off day and I've written today. I'm doing this podcast with you. Doing two podcasts today. It's weird. Like my off days are just trying to stay in the Nashville thing. You know, it's been wild. It was just embedded in you. Yeah. From the start. Yeah. So let's talk about it. So you, your parents were going through a divorce. You're going through your first heartbreak with that whole situation. You come to Nashville, the Taylor Swift way. Yes. What is, how old were you?

I was 18. So 18. I had my 18th birthday in Nashville. Wow. Yeah. So you were like, fuck this, I'm leaving. Fresh out of high school. Wow. Like packed everything and moved. Take me on that journey. Yeah. So I...

moved out here um I had like a little chevy malibu that was like I literally had like junk tape around my car dude they last forever you know that that thing lasted me for a good while and so I moved out to Nashville and I found some Craigslist roommates mm-hmm

And I moved. Oh, brave. Yeah. Very brave. I mean, hey, I was just doing it. I'm happy you're still alive. I am. This is a different time though, right? Like how long ago was this? How old are you? I am 27. Okay. Yeah. So it was before the world got real weird. Yeah. Like the world was already getting weird, but it was before like it was cut your skin off and wear it kind of weird. Yeah.

It was definitely still weird. So anyways, I went on Craigslist. I found some roommates and ended up moving to, I was living like near Sylvan Park. So very nice area in Nashville now. Yeah, I know. But it wasn't that when I moved there. Jay and I used to live in West 46. That was our first apartment. I love that. Yeah. So, you know, I just moved wherever I could afford. I think I was paying $500 a month.

for my one bedroom. And that's great. And Nashville now, I don't think you could even find anything like that. No, no. So moved here. And I, you know, like, when I moved to Nashville, I didn't know anyone. I just took a leap of faith. And I was like, I believe in myself. And I believe that I can do this as a career. Yeah. So I came out here.

And just started working like every odd in job. I was nannying. I was like the dog walker in the neighborhood. You know, like all the things. I love that you had work ethic instilled in you though. Yeah. Well, I had to. Yeah. You know, I didn't...

I didn't have financial support from anybody. So it was like, all right, get to going. And I do think like I learned that from my parents and they're like, you know what, whatever you want, go get it. Um, so I just, I started doing it all. And, um, I just kind of found myself like just lost in it all. Like I'm this young 18 year old girl. I couldn't get into the bar. Like, where do you start? Right. Um,

Like go to coffee shops, go to church. I'm like, I'm doing all the things like where can I meet people? Yeah, like I remember I called my parents. I was like, I'm going to church today. And they're like, oh, amazing. I was like, yeah, I'm gonna go try to meet. But anyway, I started just working and I was also going to community college at Nashville State.

I love it. I love the drive. Yeah. And I think that like for whatever reason, like at that point, I didn't fully believe in myself. Like I was like halfway in. Right. So I was like,

You know, and a lot of people kind of was like, hey, make sure like you have a backup plan, you know? And so... I hate people like that. Yeah. Like just go for the gusto kid. That's what I said. That's what we tell our kid. Yeah. Like go for whatever you want to do. Go be the best at it. Yeah. Like if you want to be a mailman, be the best damn mailman out there. Do it. Yeah. Yeah. I agree. So I...

I just, I started, so I'd work. I worked at this yogurt shop in Hillsborough Village, Sweet Cece's. And so I'd work there from nine to five and then I would go to class from six to nine. And I'm about a year into Nashville. It is just like not what I thought it was going to be. And so I called my sister that day and I was just crying and

And I was like, dude, what am I doing out here? Like, this is hell. Like, I came out here to write songs and be a musician. I don't even know how to start. I'm drowning in work and school. And she was like, Priscilla, you know, if you come home, like, you didn't fail. Come back. And I kid you not, I cannot make up a story. I was leaving the yogurt shop.

And I happened to be wearing a Taylor Swift t-shirt. Swear to God. T-Swift is very inspirational in your journey. Insane. I was leaving work that day that I talked to my sister and she was driving by and saw me. And I'm standing on the street corner. Taylor Swift was driving? Taylor Swift. Oh, wow. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. So like my meltdown day, I'm leaving Nashville. What is this life?

I'm walking out of work that day and happened to be wearing just one of her tour shirts. And she was driving by and saw me and pulled her car over. The Brittany Jade in the house, baby. What's up? How are you? Hi, I'm good. Thank you for having me. I'm so happy to be here. But it's part of your story. People are going to do what they're going to do. But we can throw that disclaimer out there. Smooth in the trap house. And things just like really...

I remember my parents, like when I was in the hospital after that suicide attempt, it was, I'm surprised they didn't. Cause that was the, I mean, I had taken pills and a couple other times, but that one was like really bad. Like I should have died. Can we, can we talk about it? I didn't know that was okay. So I've actually never,

I've never told this like to my husband knows I've told it to maybe a couple friends, but I just don't talk about it because it's really fucking scary. And people will be like, oh, my God, Britain, you're batshit crazy. But that's all right. We're all crazy, baby. So I actually I.

It was like downtown. I was in the city and it was more of like I was wanting attention from my boyfriend because I had went to go see him that night. But I had wrote a whole letter and it's weird because I don't remember writing the letter. I don't remember. No, no, I wasn't. I had drank in a little bit of NyQuil, but like not even a full bottle. Like my blood alcohol, I think, was like point zero three when we when they brought me.

But so I had walked three miles that night with a knife in my pocket. And the craziest part about this, I don't even remember like I don't remember grabbing the knife and carrying it with me the whole time. Was it a form of psychosis? It was never talked about like that. Yeah. It sounds like you might have been in some sort of like. Yeah. And I think almost immediately after it happened, though, my brain like was like, no, we're not remembering this. And that's why I don't remember it so well.

but have you ever done DMT no I'm but it scares me because you I just I don't know why but it's so quick I think you know tell me your experience I need to hear it once and it was with Todd Snyder who is a singer-songwriter he did Beer Run I don't know if you that's his biggest hit you know do you know Todd Snyder he's a real funny guy but uh he had it was a pen so it was a vape

Of DMT and it only lasts eight to fifteen minutes one hit of it Wow, so My experience we're sitting on his back porch and yet is on the lake out in Hendersonville on that back porch With the lake out there and there was a tree that would all of a sudden just start dancing for me. Oh my god and so that was the coolest thing and then I looked over to my right and

And God, or whoever, great spirit, picks up the land and sets it down. And he said to me, see, it's like chess. I just got goosebumps. So cute.

I tell everybody that. I'm like, I married a fucking rapper and he pulled the biggest okey-doke ever on me. A little bait and switch. But you knew I was country. Yeah, of course. At least that was at least there. But that's another thing that, another point that I'd like to bring up too is like, okay, yeah, first I married a rapper, but you are country as fuck. Like even in your raps, like your raps have hints of country music in them. But when people sit there and say that, oh, he's not country enough, like how does that make you feel? Oh, fuck them. Ha ha ha ha.

I swear this is not him putting on a front whenever I come to him and I'm like, I'm getting attacked online. He's like, baby, fuck him. How? How do you fuck him like that? Do you feel like you have something to prove to myself? Right. You know, I had a lady left a comment the other day that meant so much to me, mama. She said, I've been with you from the beginning. She said, and I remember initially telling people who you were and I'm thinking the sky was that I was insane.

And I said, well, I'd like to think that we proved them wrong, but don't really fucking matter. More importantly, we proved us right. Like what really matters here? You know what I'm saying? It's like, I know how the internet can, that's why I try to do this with you all the time. I know how toxic the internet can get at times. But man, I know what happens when I walk through the airport. All I hear is, where's your wife? How's your wife? Tell your wife we're listening to the podcast.

every girl listen it's a trick now these bitches trick me i'll have a line of girls walk up to me and they're smiling and i'm like all right let's go i got female fans you know and i'm all excited then they walk right up smiling and staring through my soul and then go is your wife with you let her say hi and they'll go oh we like your music too your fan base is so rabid

that they refer to my music as a two. They're like, think of that, like, and your music's cool too. I turned a hoe into a housewife. I'm like, oh, we haven't heard that one before. And you are so not housewife-ish, just for the record. I am pretty fucking housewife-ish. You are housewife-ish. Yeah.

I like that you said ish. That was honest. I mean, I make a home. Yes. I make sure it runs very smoothly. You're a homemaker. I'll give you that. Yeah. You're a homemaker. I make sure it runs very smoothly. But you make hotels feel homely. You make tour buses feel homely. It's your spirit. It's the like, your spirit. You got a servant spirit. Right. But you are far from a housewife.

You know what I'm saying? You act like you're, I don't want your listeners to think this bitch is out playing tennis. I tried. I tried. And they would never tell me when the lessons were at the fucking clubhouse. Remember? You kept just showing up with a skirt and two TikToks. Listen, all fucking content, baby. All content. I love you. I love you, baby. Kale Lowry. How you doing, baby? I'm good. How are you? Dude, I'm good. So she walked in. She's wearing a Metallica shirt.

And for those of you who can't see, I'm wearing a Metallica shirt myself also. So I was like, as soon as she walked in, I was like fucking soul sister. I was like, yeah. I love that you have been so open with your mental, mental,

mental illness battle because I'm very open about it too. It's so hard. Talk to me about it. So last year, I would say around this time, maybe March, I just broke down. I was super suicidal in between Kristen and one of my other girlfriends. They were like, we have to get you into the doctor. Like this, this can't go any further. We made an appointment. They put me on antidepressants and they were like,

you got to try this. When the first one didn't work, I had to be open for the next one. It's been really hard because I never thought that it would get to a point where it would be unmanageable. I was kind of just handling it myself and like going through the ebbs and flows with it. I'm on Lexapro now and it started working. I just felt like myself again. And it was so crazy because I never thought that I would feel like myself again. I completely 100% relate to that. I went

sober in 2017 off pills, sober off alcohol in 2018. Had my first bout of suicidal depression in 2020. When I say that you feel like your soul is tired. Yeah. Like you don't want to be here anymore. It's a tired that sleep can't fix. At all. It's a scary tired. Today I have one of my favorite guests back on the podcast and I'm so happy that he has blessed us with his presence again. Mr. Josh Wolf is in the house. What's up? What's up baby? Can I tell you a hundred percent? I love

I love that. Yeah, 100%. I'm having more fun. And you know what? Like...

I thought I'd be done by now. No, you got a lot of life in you, Josh. For an old dude? You're not old. Listen, your words are spells and you have to stop saying that. I'm crispy and young. There you go. Literally, there's a fucking thing. Words are spells. They are. There's a thing I have on my phone where I was getting into this rut where I was always saying, I'm old, I'm old, I'm old.

You're right. Yeah, dude. I'm starting to think of all the spells I've cast on myself in the last two days. You got to be my face frozen like that. I'm sorry. I was blown away for a second. No, you got to be really careful with what you say because the universe picks it up and you're not old. You're fucking literally on fire. Yeah, dude. Not old, young and spry.

Fucking got a big dick. Not spry. Yeah, dude. Yeah. Come on universe. Yeah. Is it too late for the big dick part? Yeah. Watch that motherfucker grow. Watch that shit in your tent tonight and watch it grow, buddy.

I know gravity is working on my nuts. It's not working on my dick quite as well. You were just starting to dabble in shrooms, right? Yeah. So you've evolved from just dabbling to full on having tent sessions under your blankets. That's the name of my next album, The Josh Wolf, The Tent Sessions. Underneath your fucking blankets. I was in Austin, Texas. I got off the plane and I just started to feel angry.

I'm not an angry dude in my rental car, punching the roof of my car. Angry. Oh my gosh. I get to the hotel room, no drugs. And I'm in bed and I'm just, so I say out loud at one point, Hey, cause I've heard about this stuff. And you know, I'd had somebody tell me you meet a lot of people. You probably pick up energies. Do you believe that stuff? Absolutely. So I was like, I just said out loud, Hey, if there's something in me on me,

please leave. Yeah. And it was almost felt like I felt something. Okay. Grip onto me. So then I was like, I said it out loud again because I'm not this dude. I was like, Hey, kind of joking. You can leave me now. Right. I ended up, Oh, this was the craziest thing. I was pushing down my arm and flicking. I felt like, so there was something in, like I was physically wrestling with something that was in me and I was trying to flick it.

out of my... At one point, I had ordered pizza before all this stuff happened. And I'm in my room. Angry pizza order. I am screaming, get the fuck. I'm arguing with this thing. When I think of summer smells, I think of sunscreen, salty beach air, barbecue on the grill, and...

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And I was like, oh, fuck. And I'm screaming. And I hear this pounding. I'm like, get out of here. And then I just heard pizza. And I was like, sorry. BRB spirit. I was like, leave it by the front door. I'm arguing with a demon. You know what I mean? But I'm flicking, flicking, flicking. Get out. Flick. I'm sweating. Oh, my goodness. And I just fell back in my bed. Pool of sweat. I felt a little lighter.

But it still felt dark in the room. And then about 45 minutes, I shot up like it had jumped back into me. This is the two years of just clarity and almost like cleansing myself. And I was like arguing with this fucking thing again, pushing it out of my body, flicking my fingers, flicking my fingers. And then it felt like somebody turned on the lights in the room and like it was still. Wow. And I felt peace. MJ Fresh, baby. I said the dollar sign. Yeah.

What you doing baby? I'm so happy you're here. I think you should tell the whole story so that people can hear your side of the story. I was gonna have to get him back. I cheated with this twin guy. So they put hands on their own mother. Yeah, they put hands on their own mother. They put hands on me multiple times. I was locked in bathrooms. And I actually like toxic. I don't wanna talk shit. I know you guys have your issues. Please don't leave me. Every girlfriend I ever had, he does this and let's tell it like it is here. I love people that I'm like, I see potential in you. You could be a good person. You really loved that dude.

And remember, I used to say, why? MJ, why? I love problems. Because you were leaving him because he had hooked up with Selena Powell on a yacht one time. I accidentally f***ed his brother. Wait. What do you mean? They look identical. It was an accident. MJ, what the hell? It sounds really bad, but it was my toxic phase. He did not like you doing f***ing.

Made you quit. Well, there was two of them. Mine and Alex's got eaten by alligator. Oh, God. But this boy can go online and literally be little women all day long, fight with them, cuss them out, treat them terrible, gaslight them, and he's got a following. Like, I don't understand that. You were just recently supposed to go on CNWit's podcast. Can I talk? Am I allowed to talk like that?

about it okay yeah she's always in my lives talking about it i'm thinking okay we're on like a friendly basis y'all get turnt like y'all are messy i'm messy like it's cool we're good vibes a rapport you felt like you guys had a rapport it was cool i can already tell she wants the messy vibes i'm like okay i'll give her mj fresh that's the dollar sign so we planned it we scheduled it normally when you do a podcast you pay for a flight pay for a hotel that's normal didn't get caleb a ticket but she tells me this

last minute i can't like the flight's full they are just now learning how to run a business and they're gonna fucking make mistakes i didn't say nothing about it online didn't say nothing obviously everyone's like well okay so you didn't say anything about it online but i'm getting there i was getting there i'm getting you did this i told you you told me not to we go established i don't listen dart a war were my exact words we didn't want beef with

fly who said this what well kristen told you to talk your shit and the girl's like yeah talk your shit like she never posted that she just posts me looking like i'm trying to be messy i'm trying to come on the podcast i don't invite myself to shit what is it what's your tagline hey hey

Hey, listen. Listen. Listen. Oh, it's no hey. No, no hey. All right, let me redo it again, okay? No, you're good. We can just leave that. Listen. Listen. Justin Nunley is in the house, baby. Middle name's Danger. Tell people where they can find you if they don't know who you are already. What's your social medias and plug those. Eggsvideos.com.

Yeah. Is that even still a thing? I used to upload my part on there. Oh, it's still there. It's still there. I just used it the other day. While you were driving. Yeah, those little boxes that you can plug into your car. They be advertising it that you can watch Netflix on your screen, on your TV. People ain't watching Netflix on these screens. No. They watching buttholes. I love a good...

Do you know everybody has their own unique butthole print? Yeah, it's like a fingerprint. Yeah, it's weird, ain't it? Do you know that you can have chocolates made into your butthole print? Yes, everybody sends me that fucking ad because they want me to do it. We should do it. That should be an episode of me making chocolate buttholes. Who's going to make the mold? You. On my butthole. You waxed my vagina before. She's waxed my fucking one pussy lip. She got one pussy lip. What?

After that, I was like, I'm not coming. His manager's like, okay. I think I worked 21 jobs. Fired from some of them. Quit some of them. Cut a guy's finger off at one of them. Wow. Yeah. We got to hear this story. I was working at the Burger King. You know, the BK lounges. Dane Cook calls it. And I was working the specialty sandwich thing with the chicken sandwiches and stuff. You know, just doing my thing. Gourmet. Slinging that chicken. Love it. And he was working the front. They never put me on front, I guess, because they didn't think I was responsible.

He came walking through the kitchen area to go on his break, and he wound up, he shot me a bird. I'm going to retaliate. Now, we're friends, right? So I grab a knife, maybe, you know, 17 at the time. So the frontal lobe has not developed here, you know, of what could go wrong with me grabbing a knife, right? I've always been kind of jumpy, like if you jump out and scare me or whatever. I've got this knife up like this right here, and I'm walking into the break room. And when I did, he had an empty cup, and he acts like he's going to throw it on me. And I go...

Blood hit the ceiling. Shit. We have a man on a mission. Jason Alexander. What's up, baby? How are you? Thank you for having me. Dude, thanks for coming. I'm like so excited to have you here. That's kind of what I feel like the type of people that are still around her now. Providing her with things and then taking advantage of it when she's in a certain state of mind. I saw that up close and personal, you know.

I saw a lot more that I won't mention, but Hollywood in the industry I've grown up in it is a different beast. It is not what people think it is. It is literally a puppet show with people that are being controlled and money. And it's really dirty. It makes you feel gross. Like when you really know everything that's going on behind the scenes.

You know, she was just there this past week for 4th of July when that whole TMZ thing came out with the basketball player. You know, she still calls me. Like, the last time I talked to Brittany was like two weeks ago. We were listening to a phone. I record all the phone call conversations just because of everything. Do you have one that we can hear a sample of on the podcast? Just so we can hear that it's her voice?

You know, when it changed, I'll tell you when it changed. When I got her, when I went to the wedding, that's what you do. You crash the wedding. You're getting married to a guy. You know, zone in on this for a second because he says it so nonchalantly. He's like, you know, you crash the wedding. But it's not just anybody's wedding. It's Britney Spears' wedding, you know. So were you guys talking right before Britney's? We were. Because most people think that you're just this...

ex-boyfriend who came out of nowhere, who has no communication with her and decided to crash her wedding. I saw you running around the house and I mean, you ran around the house a good while. I went to her room. It was locked. And she, but she was nowhere there. Like unless she was in the room, the only time that made me think that maybe she was there was when I was actually tackled at the end of the, I was laying on the ground. Like they were giving me water because I was exhausted. It was hot that day.

and everyone no no I said how nice of them to tackle you and give you water I was like the security guard that's nice I was like can I get some water and the security guard went and got it and I'm like tied up like this and they're like pouring it in my mouth and they all go and they look at the window and I'm like as soon as I turned around there was no one there and I was like was that Brittany and no one said anything but um you know I think it was I never saw her I saw Sam and I saw Kate what did Sam do when he saw you

Well, I was in the back of the cop car at that time and the windows were tinted. So I mean, I don't think he knew I was back there. I watched him walk around. I just got his body language and just was like, he's a bozo. He's a straight bozo. She has a type. TikTok's cosplay queen, Heidi. How do I pronounce your last name? Is it LaVon or? LaVon. Yeah, LaVon works. Yeah, a lot of, some people will be like LaVon. Yeah.

yeah i don't want to let's fancy i don't want to mispronounce it so is it it's heidi lavon heidi lavon heidi lavon and james ramsey what's up i'm so happy to have you guys here i know it's been so long man i feel like uh i feel like we've been talking forever you are very vocal about like your drug use and like that when did that start

a very young age. And like, I'm going to say it right now. I literally, I'm extremely empathetic and feel and relate to people who are addicts. We are still addicts. We just chose something else to replace it with. Work, the hustle, bettering your life. I got addicted to just a better, healthier lifestyle in general. It feels amazing. You never really think that you can get past that when you're so deep in your addiction and using, you just feel like you're drowning. I've tried everything. I've done everything. When did you start? How old were you? I was 12. Wow.

Yeah, in Fairbanks, Alaska, it's dark. It's desolate. You start smoking weed. That's just like the gateway thing. No, most people don't start smoking weed at 12. Oh, no, they don't. She's like, you know, just the gateway drug at 12. That was normal. I felt like every 12-year-old was just smoking.

weed and what happens after weed where what do you know it was like it was like ecstasy and mushrooms and like all that kind of stuff it's funny though some of those same friends that I like used to get in trouble with I'm still best friends with them till this day same and we all like drugs bring people together they do tear gas thing that I ask about that all the time I'm like so people are just like crying and puking like that's just what it is

Yes. It's so barbaric. Yeah. Well, you got to go through the CS chamber, right? And it's just like basically to show you what CS gas feels like and give you confidence in your pro mask. So you put your pro mask on, pop the CS canister in the building. You're like, oh, this ain't bad. And then you take the mask off and it's like immediate evacuation of everything in your sinuses. Your eyes just are watering. You can't see anything. You're like trying to get out. The drill sergeants are just laughing. You know, the way my anxiety is set up, there's no way.

I'd be like, just take me on a gurney right now. I'm out. Take me out of here. It would have to be one of my dear, sweet friends. I like to consider her like one of my best friends. Viking motherfucking Barbie is in the house, baby. Hello. Hello. No, I really know how to talk into a microphone now. Yes. I ran away.

from home which i think that happened with you too now our lives are so parallel it's crazy and symbiosis and like a lot of ways even the relationship we have which is kind of weird to me the same age difference the same kid the same like it's just like a very interesting um ran away i was with some boy you know because that's all that i wanted to do was live in a romance novel boys were always my fucking weakness i wish i would have banged around a little bit um

just saying I was thinking about that I'm like man I could have banged some beautiful ones and then I was just like in one for eight years you know no offense to him but you know he was cute at 18 or 19 but you know they get old long in the tooth long in the tooth I hate it some of the dudes I like back out I'm like how are you so bald now like it's just so crazy what happened yeah no he doesn't see this I feel bad

So what happened? Most girls would be jumping, try and lock this one down. Yeah. This dude's like, he's just getting richer. You know what I mean? Like I can't keep up with them. Right. You know? Hello. Yeah. I know the feeling. I used to make more money than my husband. Now I'm like the peon in the relationship. Here's my measly million. Yeah. You know?

fuck. It's all I got, honey. I should probably care about it more. Cause the problem I'm trying to take my focus off money. I'm trying to be more in the moment and trying to, you know, cause literally just my sign, how I was born. And I know everybody's like, don't blame it on your sign, but I was just born to work. So it's really hard to fucking break that. I've just been money oriented my entire life. So this past year,

year i guess i've really tried to like dial back and try to like take time off let my only fans go that was fucking hard dude as you get older and on this healing journey shit that mattered to you just doesn't matter anymore you just want to be a better soul doesn't matter about material things you can't take that shit with you i mean if you don't know who this woman is you must live under a rock mrs holly madison how are you doing miss holly madison i'm good thank

you. You know, like I just never, you'll see so many things. You'll see ones where you were a man. You'll see ones where you were a woman. I swear. So when you're getting hypnotized, like what does it feel like? Like, is it just you meditating pretty much? Is that what it feels like? And just really, really relaxed. Yeah. And it was kind of uncomfortable too, because I was going back to this one past life regression where I was male and I had this kind of like molestation experience. And she was like, well, tell me what he did. And I'm like,

no, because it felt so real. Like I don't want to talk about it. Yeah. Oh, that's crazy. So when did you start your spiritual journey? Like, have you always been like that or is it just something that kind of grew on you after? I've always been intrigued by like really mysterious things since I was a little kid, but I would say like 2017, I got really deep into it. Is there anything that happened like that kind of sent you on that trajectory? I know I got sober in 2017 and that's what sent me on my spiritual journey. The same year. Yeah. That's so weird. Something happened.

happened.

Yeah, we need to look at the planets in 2017 because it was a crazy year for me. Yeah, I had had my son in 2016 and was dealing with a lot of postpartum depression and stuff. So I think maybe that was kind of what got me into it was I was like talking to a lot of psychics and looking for answers and researching different things on YouTube. And then I just got really fascinated with it. Yeah, this is my loopiest interview. Today I have an internet sensation. I don't know about that. You don't.

No, I think that you are an internet sensation. Thank you. Well, that's all that matters to me. The reason why I... Taylor, Austin, Di, by the way, guys. Do you still battle with social anxiety? Oh, yeah. Love that you're very open about it because, you know, a lot of people hide it. And I'm very vocal about I have severe anxiety. I literally have panic attacks all the time. So to hear that you were suffering...

from that as a child is huge because there could be people who are dealing with their children going through it and you know for you to talk about it just probably creates like a safe space for everybody and music was my outlet i mean i truly struggled hard you know for years going to school and then when i finally found that i could go and i could have my lesson during the day it gave me that thing to look forward to and um

even I got put on anxiety medicine in high school and you know I've been on it ever since on and off um so it's just something I've always struggled with but you know a lot of people think that because I'm on stage and I see a lot of people and I meet a lot of people that that's not what gives me the anxiety right that's what that's what brings me down from it like that's my happy place and my safe place from it so. Ms. Dani Williamson. Oh thank you. How you doing

baby. I'm doing great. Feeling good. Doing great. You have an entire supplement store. Ever since I overdosed on vitamins, I refuse to take any store-bought supplements. Finally, Dani was like, you need to integrate magnesium back into your diet. She was still skeptical.

by the way. But I went home and I was just like, you know what? Danny hasn't steered me wrong yet. So I put the tiniest bit in. And when I tell you my heart palpitations completely stopped that night and stopped for months after. But magnesium itself has over 600 enzymatic pathways in your body. Your body needs magnesium desperately. We're so deficient in magnesium. We don't have it in the soil anymore, but it

It will calm your heart down, your heart palpitations, your high blood pressure, anxiety. 80% of depressed patients, the research shows, may have a magnesium deficiency, constipation, restless legs. I mean, the list goes on and on and on for the beauty, the power of magnesium. What's up, you sexy motherfuckers? Welcome to another podcast. Today...

I have the enigma, the social media enigma, the queen of queens. Hi. Jeffree Star, baby. Thank you for having me. Dude, this has been a long time coming. I feel like you're so misunderstood. I feel like with TikTok, everybody's starting to get to see the real you or the grown you. And I feel like everybody's loving it and embracing it. Her saying misunderstood was the only time today where I felt like a tinge of wanting to cry. Aww, I love you.

That's what you want to hug. Let's hug later. Listen, but yeah, it's hard when you have success to say you feel any type of way because people equate money to you feeling fine. Yeah, I didn't. I never started the brand to make money. Right. It grew insane. And then I,

So you started the brand because you came from nothing and you had something to prove. Yes. You didn't want to be a piece of shit. Your whole, or you know, whatever, uh, people, a derogatory name that people were calling you. I totally understand. I've been a hooker my entire life. Now I'm a millionaire because I fucking,

working my ass off. And they can't understand that. Yeah, like they can't let go of that past, but they want to, you know, they don't want to acknowledge what I've done with my clothes on, you know? So I totally understand where you're coming from. So you knew just growing up in chaos that it was better to just push it down instead of react. Yes.

It had to. Which was horrible for me later when all the like emotions and traumas and demons were coming out. And I'm in high school. My whole body is a cutting board. Yeah. I'm like fully. And like I see, you know, secret one, not like I want attention. Like, you know, it's. I feel like back in the day, mental health was not talked about. No one talked about it. Like how it is now. Yeah. And cookie cutter Orange County. No one was talking about feelings. Right. Yeah.

It's like, get the fuck over it. You know, everyone's, all the husbands are cheating on the wives, all the, you know, everyone's getting beat. All these crazy things are happening and it's just swept under the rug. And it's like the row housewives of orange County. Absolutely. Yeah, no, it really is. The West coast is a different beast. People don't understand that unless you've grown up on the West coast. It's,

completely different way of thinking and way of living as like you know if I can Montana or yes in Wyoming so I didn't untrain this behavior until probably like six years ago when you were cutting was that your way of just kind of like relieving the pain and did I know she didn't know for years and then I slipped up and got comfortable and she saw it for the first time

What's up guys? I'm so happy to have you guys on the podcast. So listen, so for the month of October, we are doing a murder mystery series and we are bringing on special guests and Mimi and I put our heads together and we were like, who would be a perfect guest to have in this series? And Lauren, the mortician baby, we fucking hit her up and she was like, can we do it tomorrow? And I was like, absolutely. She was here, man.

And here she is. What's up, baby? Hey. Oh my gosh, I'm so excited to be here. Have you accidentally ever left something on a body when cremating it? Yes. Is there jewelry and stuff? Yeah. I hate my life. Yep, I did it one time. So every time we cremate somebody, we should look at their hands. Sometimes they're in the body bag. Oh, wait, you cremate them in the body bag? Mm-hmm.

I didn't know that. I thought they were completely naked. I thought they were naked and you just threw them in the oven. They're usually naked if they're in the body bag, especially if they die at a hospital or if they die after they have an autopsy. But sometimes they die, like maybe they're on hospice or they die at home and then they'll have their clothes on. And we don't put them in a body bag. We just put them right in the cremation container.

But I accidentally cremated somebody with a ring on and I had to call the family and tell them. And the son told me, he goes, it's okay. She got it out of a Cracker Jack box anyways. So he said it really wasn't that special. He said, I just, you know, I got so lucky. So lucky. I never did it again. I was blessed that day. It just happened to be that one time. He just said, he was like, oh, not a big deal. But I was honest about it. And I told him because...

He could have been a douchebag and been like, this was a diamond cut. He could have. I mean, right now telling you about it, I have anxiety because I knew that I still now that I fucked that up and I still feel horrible. But he said he just he said it wasn't a big deal. He said it was actually happy that it went with her because he said that was probably what she would want. So I got really. You knew. Have you ever had to dismember a body? Thankfully not. That's a really big thing because I'll have families. They'll ask. They'll say, can I have grandma's gold teeth?

Grandma always wanted me to have her gold teeth. They don't teach me how to remove teeth in school. Can you picture me in the back with a hammer knocking those suckers out? No. Oh my gosh. And I'll ask the families that. I'm like, no. And if you want to hire a dentist, that's fine. They know how to do that. You have to be so careful at the funeral home because...

desecration of a corpse is a really big thing. So we always have to have signatures that says it's okay to do something. I've also never removed breast implants. Really? Even for cremation? Because I heard they explode. They don't explode, but sometimes they can melt and then not fully melt away. So they get a little gummy, the forbidden gummies on the bottom of the crematory floor. So you just kind of scrape it out.

But what I do remove from the body is pacemakers. So you'll see those like under, you know, we remove those, but we have signatures and I get permission and I tell them like so that they know what's happening back there. Thankfully, I've never had to dismember a body. Yeah. No Jeffrey Dahmer shit going on. No. Love to hear if y'all have had any psychedelic experiences. And I remember a long time ago on one of the podcasts, you told a story about like

you had seen something or done something the first time I did acid it was a great trip we laid outside on an electricity box in a fucking apartment complex and stared at the sky and I saw angels and then I had sex on it it was fucking amazing god sex on acid is actually pretty fun we stared at my panties for like two hours oh because they were like in a neon light or actually that was the second time I did acid and then the first time I did acid was a good trip my ex that passed away he looked like

the devil to me and it scared me um i accidentally hallucinated on dayquil the other day how nightquil nightquil i took way too much i was sick as fuck i was really trying to get better and then i just started to hallucinate it was bad everything was just like melting in on me oh and the fucking melting i don't know how you tolerate it dude yeah when i had shrooms the other day it felt like my face was melting off of it i will fucking go to the hospital

Don't if something starts melting around me, I'm going to freak out full panic. I just embrace it. I knew I know it's not forever and I know I only have it temporarily. So I embrace it and enjoy it. You're a fucking psychopath. Literally. So he has orgasmed watching his parents slaughter a pig and then got caught masturbating.

And then she puts his fucking genitalia in boiling water like something was really wrong with her. I think maybe she might have gone through some sort of sexual abuse or something. You don't get like that unless something happened to you. Yeah, absolutely. So she's just traumatizing him back. There's a little touch of the psychotics in that bloodline. During their upbringing, Ed and Henry were prohibited from spending any leisurely time away from the family's rural neighborhood.

farming property in Plainsville, which meant their only physical escape was attending school. However, Augusta would discipline her sons if they attempted to make any friends at school, which significantly impeded their social interactions. And Ed in particular became a victim of bullying. I was, I grew up in a really strict household and I was like, fuck this. I'm not fucking, this isn't right today. I have tick talks, spiritual advisor.

Amy Boleski, how are you doing baby? Did I pronounce it right? Yeah, you did. You did absolutely. How are you doing baby? I am wonderful. I'm good. I'm kind of like the resident Air Force medium. I would read for everybody. In the meantime, I ended up having my kid and then I ended up starting to have a lot of issues. It's okay. Hmm. It's okay. A lot of issues.

And I didn't know why. What kind of issues? Oh, bad ones. Like my vagina falling out of my body. Oh. Like bad. Like bad. And this is after you gave birth. Oh, after I had a kid. Like, have you ever sneezed and your asshole falls out? Like, that's a whole nother thing. Okay. I can't wait for those times in life. Oh, just wait. Oh, yeah.

I can't. Are there any diaper? I had to make you laugh. Are there any fucking diaper sponsors? Because we can, I'm just going to, I'm going to manifest a diaper sponsorship. I know. Please, Jess, no. You put on a glove and you shove it back in. Do you have anybody like that lost? Okay. Only reason I'm saying this, like,

Greg. Uh, like around me? No, just somebody. I don't know. It was weird. Is there a Greg in the room? The only reason I said that is because there was a name of Greg that popped up on my spirit box. And then over here, I drove by a building that said Greg on it. And then I saw a street that said Greg. Yeah. And there's another thing. So there's something to do with Greg. Greg? That's my uncle that died.

I got fucking goosebumps. Greg. Hello, Greg. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Hello, Greg. Dude, I got goosebumps. I guess that's coming up. I need you to go back and wait with them.

Like, are you gonna, can you do that? Yeah, what's up with that? With my dad? Yeah, for like Christmas this year. I know it's hard or something. Ah, he's on a kidney transplant list. It's crazy. I'm like shaking. I need you to go and be with him. And he's talking about being. Isn't that random? That's wild. Yeah, that is. I love my mom.

She absolutely fascinates me and that's very rare because people don't fascinate me too much but I am so curious about this woman. Miss Gabby Tuft, how are you baby? I'm wonderful. It's so good to be here in Nashville. Oh my god, I love it. I'm just like, girl, I need to just fuck a guy and get it over with. He goes, get on Grindr. What's Grindr? And she looks at me like, what do you mean what's Grindr? I don't know. Give me your phone. I've never been with the guy and I knock on this guy's door. It's his apartment and he is handsome.

We didn't get down to actually him fucking me because I was way too nervous. I was going to paint all over him and shit on the bed. I'm like, I can't, I can't. I've had poop balls fall out before. It's the worst. My worst nightmare. Let me tell you, it is the worst. I look like a little M&M's. Little cookie dough batters on the bed.

Yes. Horrendous. Yeah. At one point, you know, I'm going down on him and I'm kind of doing my thing. And this is my first time doing this. Right. So you've never sucked a dick before? Never. Did you think you were doing a pretty good job? I mean, you had one. I asked him, I said, if I do something wrong, tell me. He's like, no, no, no, no, no, no. Don't even. I'm like, oh, okay. Yeah. And at one point he goes, so, yeah. Yeah.

My ex-girlfriend, she used to make me put her stockings on her, on me. And I just was like, what? You know?

I was just all... Not the dick coming out of the mouth. I just looked at him and I was all, be careful. That's how I got started. He goes, oh, no, no, no. I have the country rap king in the building and I am so thrilled and so honored, Mr. Colt Ford. Thank you. It is my pleasure. It is my pleasure. I don't know if I'm the king, but I'm just... I'm glad to be here for sure and it's cool to be doing this with you. Do you ever feel like that? Do you ever feel like...

these people that you have helped is kind of like a stepping stone. Do you ever feel like they've kind of like left you behind even when they've gotten a little bit more notoriety than you have? Not really because I didn't, I never, I have never done anything with the intention of making sure you give me something back. But what's right is right, you know? There is that and there's some truth to that and there's some people that I think

could help a little bit more, but I meant a lot of them don't have the stones to do that or to buck the system, so to speak. And go, I don't give a shit what you want. I meant, I'm, I'm down with Colton. I want you to help. I meant, and so it,

yeah, there's times when I get frustrated with it because I'm like, man, I've done a lot and I feel like, but I've never got, I've never been on any award show. I've never, I've never gotten to do any, I've never done any of that. Which they're not all they're cracked up to be. No, and I get that too. Just so you know. Like I said, I mean, it's easy. They're really hot and it's like a freaking,

Big warehouse. I mean, I've gone to them a bunch, but I just have never gotten to really play on them. I've never gotten to do anything. That's like a dream of an artist is to get to play at a show. Give me the mic. I'm pretty good with just the mic. It'll be funny if you let me host it. Yeah. You let me and Jelly host it. It'll be funny as shit, I guarantee you. Oh, dude, that would be hilarious. But, you know, I don't know. There's times when, you know, and sometimes you get alone and you go, man...

I deserve to get that or to get at least give me a chance. Yeah. Because for me, it was always where we're not sure if you're country. And I'm like, have you ever been to my show? My fans are the country of the country. And then it was like, well, I feel like you represent the right trash country. Just, I mean, I'm like, I don't know.

it was always like, we're scared. What if one person, like I was in a station, like my dad's really never heard me on the radio and he's 87. He's not in great shape. That makes me sad to go, you know, with all I've done to go, man, he's never really got, my hometown radio station doesn't, never played me. Oh my gosh. And so it's like that, that's frustrating. Yeah. That's frustrating sometimes. And I think at this point, this podcast is brought to you by eHarmony, the

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I think they thought I was a fad or it was something that just kind of caught a little niche and it'd go away. You've been around for how long now? Now we're talking 15 plus years and multiple platinum and gold records. And now it's like, well, if they play me now, then they have to go, we were wrong. Yeah, baby. Today we are doing another true crime slash murder mystery podcast. And we have none other than the unrecognizable...

Chelsea Lynn, baby. What's up, mama? I'm great. Thanks for having me back on the pod. She's giving the child away and she's trading sexual favors for drugs. At 11. At 11 years old. Because she has so much pain. She's just trying to numb. She doesn't know anything better. Nobody was there to teach her, hey, this is the right thing to do. You shouldn't, you know.

You're 11. You should be going to school and fucking enjoying your childhood. She's being beat by this grandfather. God knows who knows what the grandmother did because she's a raging alcoholic. She literally had no place to go. She had no examples of what to be like. Mm-hmm.

how to do better. Eileen Wuornos ended up dropping out of her school. Her grandmother died of liver failure and her grandfather eventually kicked her from the home at 14. Started to live in the woods, fending for herself through prostitution. She was prostituting at 14. Oh my gosh. I couldn't imagine. Where are you finding the people?

Oh, easily. So sick. Right. Grown men are disgusting. I think what needs to be talked about more is I have dealt with sexual advances from men since I was five years old. It's disgusting. I was playing in a boat in my front yard one time and a dude came up and started jacking off in front of me when I was five years old. Dahmer was honestly trying to hide it. I don't feel like she was trying to hide these. Right. Maybe she wanted to get caught. She's just dumping bobbies and taking cars. Dahmer's over here like digging graves for these people and eating them. Ugh.

And it's fucking them. It's the car for me. If I'm killing someone, I'm not driving their car around. No, I'd be fucking petrified. Do you ever know what kind of drugs they were on? Because I feel like that does also play a role in like what mental state you're in. Yeah. Weakers don't think things through very well. Correct. You know, it is whack.

You never know, man. She's, I mean, it could have been cause yeah, like tweakers just like, they don't logically think they, you know, they're just going to take this car. Right. But not through the whole scenario. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, I don't think they ever talk about their drug abuse. It's crazy. They should. And they were caught for it, but never like what kind of drugs. I mean, you look at pictures of her girlfriend and she looks like a crackhead. Yeah, I haven't seen real pictures. I saw Christina Richie in the movie. Oh, no, I saw real pictures. Really? So she might have been a crackhead. We got Dimps in the house, baby. Hey, how's it going? She's coming to fucking spill some tea today. Give some dating advice. I mean, who...

Wouldn't want dating advice from the, from the Demps. The Dempsy. Todd! Probably fucking has nightmares at night hearing that in his mind. It's not that bad, is it? A little bit, yeah. Nails on the chalkboard. Todd!

I thought it was going to work out. He was that companion that anything that was happening in my life, I could call and tell him all the good news, the bad news. I could share everything. A lot of people don't know that you guys were talking for a whole year because you actually kind of just played it off like you guys were just friends. I mean, it didn't take a rocket scientist to figure that I was sleeping with a guy. You know, the internet likes confirmation. Hmm.

Because if not, all they do is speculate. There was a lot of problems in the relationship. I don't need people to nitpick apart our whole relationship because I don't know how it would be if he was sitting here. I probably would have tore his ass a new one. In lieu of the circumstances that have happened, absolutely. We rekindled our...

There was a time period where we took a break because he wasn't meeting my needs. And it is so exhausting having to explain yourself in a relationship. Hey, this is not working. This is what I need you to do. You know what I mean? It's exhausting. What needs wasn't he meeting? Physical and sexual. Yeah. Like he just couldn't. Just lay it down.

Oh man. Oh no. And I don't know. Cat Daddy's got all that dick and doesn't know what to do with it. Hold on. Let me make sure I get this right because there's so many like accolades that come with this man's name now. Two time Grammy nominated Jelly Roll. Yes. Did I do it right? You did it right. You know what I thought about though? I'm going to challenge you on this because I had this thought the other day about myself. Do you think

That it's age that's made us this patient, right? Or trials and tribulations? Or do you think that this is who we always were and that God just finally softened us, put us in a soft enough situation to be who we were? I think it's a little bit of both. Because I thought about that. It's like where we are in our lives right now, we could be any person we wanted to be. Like at a time we could be out being the wildest we could have ever been. We choose not to be.

at a time where we could be doing just, you know, like we have access to so many things that if we'd have had access to even four or five years ago, we'd have jumped on probably. But that's why. And I feel like God didn't give us what we wanted at that time so badly because he knew we would mishandle it. And I feel like...

you can't be this wise young because you won't live. Right. You know? So it's like, I feel like we had to fucking make mistakes. We had to be assholes. We had to fucking hurt people. We had to be, you know, just to get to this moment. And I feel like it's a little bit of age and I feel like it's also who we were. It's just, we, that is what molded us. I sure hope, I hope Kev on stage fucking puts an organ behind you saying that like he did me fucking. Yeah.

Come on, Kev, on stage. Let's go, baby. Preach! Preach! You're like, oh, that's deserving. That's cool. And it's kind of a praise moment where just the... It's one night that we celebrate music. Yeah. And it's kind of one night where the boxes don't really matter no more. Right. You know? And that's the hardest thing of the music business because there's so many boxes and then...

you know, no matter what box you're in, people don't think you belong in it. Right. You know, and I thought that was just me because I always get the you're not country stuff. And it's like, what I got to do, go fuck a goat. You know what I mean? God, would it help if I told everybody Bunny was my cousin? Bunny's my cousin, y'all. You know, it's like, fucking, what do y'all need from me? Not first. We're real cousins. We're cousin cousins. But it's like, you know, bad joke. But I'm from the South. I can joke like that. Yeah.