S2 EP3. I Feel Like A Burden To God
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Hello, everybody. Welcome to another episode of Christ with Coffee on Ice. I am your host, Allie Yost, and I am so grateful and I am so excited to be here with y'all. If you're physically watching, this is an exciting episode for me because I've got this handy dandy mic on.

stand now. So now I'm like, I'm free as a bird. I got both my hands to talk with. I got one hand on my Bible. I got another hand shaking my fist. Like I'm so excited to have both of my hands. Yeah. I don't know. It was never an issue for me to hold my microphone, but I am very excited to have assistance here. So now I have both my hands.

We can flip through the pages of the Bible with both my hands. No, y'all, this is so good. Anyway, what a blessing. I'm so grateful, y'all. Happy Friday. I hope your spirits are high, and if not, that's okay. We are human, and that is what this podcast is also here for. I pray, I pray, I pray over this episode. God, I just pray that you bless every single listener and you just speak through me to them. God, I pray that this message is so good.

that they leave their car or their apartment or their work office or their cubicle or their treadmill just reborn and filled with your light and life and the Holy Spirit, God. Amen. Amen, y'all. I'm so excited to be here. And I'm just going to be honest, like Satan almost got me this week.

He really did. I mean, how many of us relate to that right now? Can I get an amen? Oh my gosh. He almost, he thought he had me. He thought he did. I don't know what it is, but I have just been so in my head this week. It's been so bad. It's been so hard for me to even open my Bible. And, you know, I feel like as Christians, like we hear that from others. And especially like when we're on a good streak, it's hard to think that we'll ever like feel that. I don't know. It's not that I think I'm better than anyone else. It's just like...

When you say it out loud, it sounds so silly, right? Like it's just been so hard for me to open the word. Or not even that, but like the self-doubt, right? And the biggest topic that I want to get into this week. So we're going to go ahead and use what devil thought was working on me to bring people even closer to God this week and let the Holy Spirit, Uno, reverse that. We're going to talk about exactly what it was.

that the devil was speaking into my mind because I know he's working on y'all too. Okay. If you're alive and breathing today, he's working on you or he's trying to. And that's just the hard truth about, you know, believing is that the closer we get to God and the more that God pours his wisdom into us, the more we are a threat to Satan and the more that he's

coming for us, which is nothing to be afraid of because we have God on our side and he is the man, right? He is the man. Okay. The man of all mans. He is the king of kings. So, I mean, we're on the good team. We're on the superior winning team. And that's why Satan comes for us left and right. And just there is no breaks.

And sometimes it gets discouraging. But what I was going to say is, you know, sometimes I'll hear other believers that are like, yeah, sometimes I just feel like a burden to God. And it's like, what? How could you ever feel like a burden to God? Like he loves you and he wants like his whole purpose is is.

to want to help his children, right? Like his whole purpose is to love on us and our whole purpose is to honor him through that. And so, you know, it's so easy to speak that life into others, but it's really hard to remind yourself of that. And sometimes when I reflect and I'm like, am I really saying the same things to myself that my sister was just saying to me, you know, my sister in Christ or my brother in Christ was just saying to me the other week and I spoke so much light into them and I was like, what? I'm

no, you can't think that of yourself. How could you? And then we do the same thing. Like we do the same thing to ourselves and it's just, we see ourselves in just different light. And it's so clear when we're looking at other people, you know, like we can see Satan all over, you know, other people, but it's really hard to recognize him when he's in our own home, you know? And,

Sometimes I'm in denial where I'm like, no, no, no, I'm not letting him near me. Like there's no way. But if I really look myself in the mirror, there are clear indications and clear signs that I have let him in and I didn't even know. I left a door, a window open. I was careless.

I was careless. I left a window cracked. I left a door open and he got in, right? So now what are we going to do to kick him out? And so this week has just been like a weird one for me. But thank you, Holy Spirit. Thank you, Jesus. I'm just so grateful that he's brought me back to life and he's brought me back to the truth. I feel like the biggest thing that helped me all was last night, you know, in current time of me recording this, last night I was on TikTok Live and I was actually in the shower. So let me...

I wasn't in the shower on TikTok Live. Wait a minute. I'm going back like 15 more minutes. Okay. So before that moment, I was in the shower. Y'all, I get banned. Okay. No, we're not doing that. And also not in the name of Jesus. We're not doing that. Okay. But I

I was in the shower and I heard God be like, you're going live on TikTok and you're reading the Bible. I've never done this, by the way. I have never. First off, it's giving trauma flashbacks to high school when your teacher would call on you. No, that's like what God just did to me. My teacher, God, Jesus called on me and I'm

minding my business. You know how sometimes in class you would just be minding your business, your head is down, you've got your face in your paper and you're writing notes and you're also just like probably not even paying attention and then your teacher just calls on you and says, I want you to read in front of the class. That's what Jesus did to me. And he said, I want you to read

the Bible on TikTok live. That's it. And I said, that's scary. And I had been telling myself all week that I needed to get into the word because I felt like that was the biggest reason why Satan was in my mind and messing with me because I was not keeping my home clean with the word, right? Like I was not picking up after myself. I wasn't picking up the pieces. And honestly, picking up the pieces is something we have to do every day through the word. Like being

in the word, y'all. You gotta do it. You gotta do it. That is the juice. We've said that, right? That's the bread and butter. That's the juice. And I just hadn't been prioritizing it. There was just something in me. We all know what it was. Something in me that was keeping me from wanting to open the word.

okay and so I heard God just be like you're gonna do it and so I said okay and I got on TikTok live and I was so nervous and my heart was beating so fast at first because y'all know okay it probably sounds silly because I get online all the time and I'm always like online and in front of hundreds of thousands of people and it may not make sense why I got nervous but I did and I got nervous because I was like live like there's something different about being live right and reading like I didn't

didn't even like reading in front of my 20 classmates in high school when I would get called on like oh my gosh talk about nerve-wracking now I got to do it in front of a few hundred people um I was just nervous in the beginning and at first people were I mean people were being very kind but you know you get the hate comments where people are just whatever but it ended up being so rewarding y'all we stayed on tiktok live reading the book of Matthew I don't know shocker we all know how much I love the book of Matthew I actually wasn't even planning on reading the book of Matthew I was gonna read the

book of Job because that's like what I'm in right now in the Bible. I've had so many people in my life also. This was crazy, crazy confirmation from God. I don't know if y'all have the Bible app. You got to get it. I have it. And it's, I also mostly just have it for just daily scripture. So you can set an alarm of what time of the day that you would want it to send it to you. But it's just a little notification that pops up on your home screen and it's a Bible verse of the day, right? So I love it for that. So right after I had a conversation with

with a girlfriend of mine. After she had told me I had to read the book of Job, I then saw a TikTok of this guy talking about scripture and he was referring to the book of Job. Nuts. Then it gets even crazier because then that evening, my little verse of the day. Yeah, I know this sounds made up. It's not. My little verse of the day that came up, my jaw dropped. I literally dropped my phone and I said, okay, Holy Spirit. I

my gosh okay Jesus was from the book of Job I don't even remember the bible verse to be honest but I think I was too distracted the fact that it was from the book of Job so I felt God really bringing me to that that book so I've been reading it I've been really trying to again I told you I've been a little distracted and you know all that but so I wanted to read the book of Job on

TikTok or Proverbs because I really love Proverbs too. And I haven't fully finished Proverbs yet, but everyone in the chat was saying Matthew. So I was like, I mean, we can do Matthew, especially because if anyone was joining that had never even tried to open the Bible, I do think Matthew is a great place to start. So...

We opened the book of Matthew. Am I giving too much backstory? I don't know. Whatever. I'm talking too much. But anyway, we're going to be pulling a few pieces of scripture from Matthew today. Whatever, y'all. I know I talk about it a lot, but maybe we just need to... Maybe you've read Matthew a million times, but I feel like you can read Matthew a million times and more because it's from the Bible. We should be reading the Bible over and over and over and over again. And you just never know how things are going to speak to you even after the 100th time you read it, you know? But anyway, so we read the book of Matthew and we spent two hours...

reading the Bible and just like talking about it and discussing it and it was so cool and I actually really think I want to make a habit out of it like I would love to do that as like a weekly thing aside from what we do here on the podcast like I mean it was so good for my soul like it was so good for my soul and I know that it was probably so good for everybody else on the other side of the screen like it was just so rewarding for everybody involved in that you know and

I think it really brought me back to life. I think that was the moment God just like truly brought me back to life and spoke the truth back into me. So if you're feeling like you're in a weird funk, if you feel like you've been letting the devil get a little too close to you, that is what today's episode is about because we're gonna let tell him to just buzz off today. We're gonna go tell him to take a hike. We're gonna tell him to take a hobby, take a vacation, not because he deserves it, but because we do. Get out of our lives. Like leave us alone. He is such a punk, y'all. He is such a

we remember that and we remind ourselves who we are and who he is, it gets easier. Because I think we forget who we are. Like, we legitimately forget that we are a creation of God. I am a child of God, right? You are a child of God, which, by the way, is the most powerful being. And we are on his, like, we are a piece of him, a piece of him living.

him lives in us, and we're gonna let this little punk tell us what to do, right, okay, so we're gonna, I'm gonna, we're, this is a reality check for all of us, okay, I'm gonna bring y'all back down to earth, we're gonna be back grounded by the Holy Spirit after this episode, and I'm so excited about it, because Satan has no chance, he doesn't have a chance today, tomorrow, or the next, he has no chance today, and I don't care, I can hear him crying in the corner of the pits, oh,

From where he came from, I can hear him crying. I don't even care. I'm sorry. Did you hear something? I didn't. I didn't. All right. So let me reel it back in. Sorry. I went a little tangent. I got a little too heated up yet. I can't. It's just the beginning of the episode. We can't get heated just yet. All right. So the biggest thing that Satan has been trying to say to me this week is that I am a burden for how much I need God. Now, I know a lot of y'all are shaking your head like, girl, please. That

That is like such a grade A, like classic move of the devil. The thing is, is like the devil has the same moves. He just kind of does it in a different font each time, but he only has a few. Okay. Some of his moves is doubt. Honestly, he comes for our confidence the biggest. Like he wants us to be so insecure in who we are. He wants us to be so insecure in our relationship with

with God. He wants us to be insecure about, you know, our purpose and what we really can bring to the table when the truth is we can bring so much to the table because we have the Holy Spirit living in us. So it's like he just wants to come for our confidence the biggest and he wants us to

question ourselves and also question our relationship with God, okay? Because that's the biggest threat. If you have a relationship with Jesus, and even better yet, if you are getting closer to Jesus or if you want to begin a relationship with Jesus, you are a huge threat.

threat to the enemy because you are starting to figure it out. You are starting to see the light and you are starting to see the truth, which is God's love and how much he really does care for you and wants to be by your side every second of the day to help you through every minute. He wants to help you through every minute of the day. There is no such thing as being a burden to God, right? He created you. He wanted you. If he knew that you were going to be a burden or if he knew

knew that it would be a lot to take care of you. Don't you think he would have thought twice before creating you? I mean, for real, like he already knew that he wanted you. And the best part is he already knew you before you were born. He already forgave you of all your sins and mistakes that you made before you were even conceived. Okay. So that is just the biggest lie from the enemy. We can never be a burden to God because he knew us before we were born. And he's

still wanted us and he still chose you. You are here on earth because he wants you and he chose you. You are not needy. You're not a burden. You don't ask for too much from him, okay? And honestly, like that's been the biggest lie that the NAB has been telling me this week because I've just been like

going through it mentally, just weird ruts, weird, like where I could tell that the devil was coming for me, but I wasn't really doing anything about it. And I wasn't really rebuking him in the name of Jesus as the way I should have been. And I was almost acting like I had to rebuke him in the name of Jesus on my own though, without Jesus.

How in the world am I supposed to rebuke the devil? Wait, first off, how in the world am I supposed to do anything in the name of Jesus without the presence of Jesus? I can't just use his name. I got to use him. I can't just use his name. I got to use him. So it's like I was saying the word Jesus, right? As if it was a magic word, which it is like there is so much magic. There's so much power. There is so much authority there.

by using the name of Jesus. But I was saying it in such a hollow way. I was saying it in a way that was empty, where it was like I was calling the name of Jesus, but I wasn't calling Jesus, right? Does that make sense? So I was acting as if I had to like tell the devil to buzz off on my own, using the name of God, but without actually using God because I didn't want to bother him. Because I was like, Allie, do you really have to like call off the devil again for the fifth time? It's only Tuesday. But that's the

point. No, but that's the point. And God knows that. So, I mean, I just, I've just been filled up with so much doubt, so much like I'm a burden and, and I can't believe that I can't, like, I can't even just like go a day without feeling the enemy after me. Yeah, no, that's how it works. No, there is not a single day that we're going to live. That's why walking in faith

And walking in light with Jesus is so hard because you will constantly be a threat to the enemy. If you were not a threat to the enemy and he was leaving you alone, it's because you were already serving him. So as long as you're serving the enemy, he's not going to bother you. You're not going to be a threat. He's not going to come after you, right? But we're not serving the enemy. We're serving Jesus. We're serving God. So he won't stop.

Like there is no day of rest against the enemy, but the beautiful thing is God is available all the time. There is no cap out. There is no like, uh, what I'm thinking about is like the sand.

The freaking sand thing that you flip upside down for time. Like, it's not like you just get a certain amount of Jesus per week. And if you run out, oh, well, it looks like you just got to handle all the rest of your battles with Satan alone. No, God is infinite. God is past time. He is bigger than...

the cup that I'm imagining in my mind where I'm like, I've already asked for too much. Like my cup, it's empty of the Jesus stuff. Like I can't keep asking for him. He's infinite. He's forever, right? He's never ending and his love is never ending. So that is just a lie. That is a lie.

And as long as the devil can keep me in this box and keep y'all right. I know I'm speaking to somebody. We all relate to this. But as long as he can keep you in a box of like, you're too needy for your dad. Try to, I mean, just do it on your own. You don't need him every minute of the day. No, I do actually. No, I do actually. I pray to God. Actually, I need him every minute and every second of my day because without him, I am not capable of keeping

keeping the devil away. I'm not capable of doing anything by myself. I need Jesus. I need him every minute of the day. And that is not needy. That is being human. And he knew that when he created me and he knew that when he created you. Can I get an amen? Oh my gosh, we are rebuking the devil today. So that's the biggest thing that I've been working with is I've just been really struggling with the guilt.

Right. And so then this is the other lie. It's a domino effect, man. The minute that I let the enemy tell one lie to me, it's like it is like free game for him. At that point, he is like rubbing his hands together and he is like, OK, that worked. What more can I do? You know, like the minute you just crack that window, you crack that door that minute that you leave it unattended and you're irresponsible.

or you're not paying attention and you're allowing him to tell you lies even when you don't even realize. I mean, it is a domino effect. You are opening the door. It is opening even more. He is slowly opening that freaking window and it's just more and more lies. And he's going to get away with as many lies that he can tell you until you are at a place where you are so low that you don't believe in Jesus, that you no longer have a relationship with God anymore and now you are serving him and his lies. I mean, unbelievable.

Oh my gosh, wait, what? Okay, wait. Listen, listen, listen. I want to pull out a scripture from Matthew right now. This is what it is, all right? And you know what's funny? This is about money. And we've talked about this scripture already on the podcast, but I gotta bring this back because it's so good. This is Matthew 17.

624. Okay. No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you can be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money. How about we switch money to, you cannot serve both God and the lies from the enemy. You cannot serve God. You cannot believe in God. You cannot have faith in God, but then

also allow the devil to speak into your mind because now you are serving him. You are serving the lies. You are buying into it and you are letting him into your mind where it starts off as just one harmless little lie, right? And sometimes we can even acknowledge it. Sometimes we can even be like, yeah, I know that's the devil, but whatever. He'll buzz off eventually. He'll leave. I'm just going under. I'm just going. I'm under some spiritual warfare right now. That's all. It'll, it'll,

it'll subside. It'll go away. It always does. We can't treat it like that because the thing is, is like, he won't stop unless we command him to get the frick out.

In the name of Jesus and by the power of God, he's gonna leave, right? Because I am a child of God, which means I am a child of peace. I am a child of reassurance. I am a child of love from the Lord. I am not a child of lie. I am not a child of doubt. I am not a child of self-pity. I am not a child of anxiety. I am not a child of...

the lies that he tells us, right? And so what starts off as one simple little cute little tiny lie from the enemy can eventually grow into this domino effect where now he is continuing to lie to you. And because you let this one lie in, he's going to see how far he can take it. So the one lie that I let him into my mind that I was allowing into my mind

this week was that I'm asking God for too much or I could just handle this moment by myself. So then the next lie that I was letting the devil speak to me, the next domino that was knocked over after that first lie was that God deserves so much better from me, which is

isn't necessarily a lie, but Satan was using it in a way to discourage me where I felt embarrassed. I felt guilt towards God because I was doubting God's power or I felt guilty that I even allowed myself

to listen to Satan, even knowing that I shouldn't be, or I should be trusting God more. He just deserves more from me, right? All the time that I've let the devil, you know, convince me I shouldn't be reading my Bible. I've let four or five days go by without me even opening the gospel. And then I feel bad and I feel guilty. And then, and I feel guilty because I'm saying God deserves better from me though. Why did I go four or five days without reading the Bible? Like I

I'm so high and mighty and I'll be on the verge of just like absolute tears and I'll be praising him with every fiber in my body one day and then I'll go four or five days without even touching my Bible. God deserves so much better from me and he does. Like honestly, there isn't a lie in that, but the devil was using it in a way to make me feel even more guilty where now I don't even want to show my face to God, right? I haven't opened my Bible, but now I feel so guilty that I'm like, I'm going

undeserving of God. Like, honestly, I'm undeserving. We don't deserve God, but he loves us regardless. And he's already forgiven us for our mistakes. Right. But that's the part that Satan leaves out. That's the part that he wants us to forget. He wants us to remember that. Oh, yeah. No, we are full of sin. No,

yeah, we make mistakes and we even go off track. We forget to read our Bible. We don't want to read our Bible. We choose not to spend time with God when we should. Like, I mean, that is just something that we're going to do. But the other half of that is that God knows that though. And he still loves us. God knows that though. And he's still forgiven us. There

there is nothing that can take God's love from us. Not a single thing can take God's love from us. Not our sin. That's why Jesus died on the cross, right? Not even our sins can take God's love from us. So as long as Satan can like leave that part out and own

make us feel guilty for the fact that we're not good enough for God and we should be ashamed and we should turn away from him. Oh, he'll do it. He'll leave out all the part. That's the truth, right? All the part that brings us out of guilt. He'll keep only the guilt part, but take out all the stuff that would lead us to light and lead us to the truth. Okay. So that was the

other lie that I was letting him tell me was like, I was like, okay, I've gone all this time without reading my Bible. I haven't hardly even spent time with God. He deserves so much better for me. Honestly, I'm the worst. Like I literally am the worst. Like how can I praise him one day and then treat him like I don't need him the next day?

it's honestly unfair and he doesn't deserve that from me. And so then I'm feeling all of this guilt on top of the guilt and it was just a snowball. So yeah, the enemy is a liar. He's a liar. And as long as we are believing the lies that he is telling us, we are serving the devil. We are fully serving the devil unintentionally, but by believing what he tells us,

is serving him rather than believing God and serving him in his truth rather than in Satan's lies, right? I think a lot of the reason that I was also feeling guilt for being so needy is I was telling myself the things that I needed from God this week were small, that it was just small stuff. It wasn't big stuff. I was almost gaslighting myself being like, yeah, but like these aren't even big things. I

I just need God to help me get up earlier in the morning. And that's not even a big deal. Like I can do that. I can do that on my own. You know, I just need God to like help me, you know, vacuum my home and be productive and clean my house. You know, that's just such small stuff though. I should be able to do that on my own. And I mean, God, the Holy Spirit will help you with anything. And it doesn't matter on what side of the spectrum. You could be starving on the streets or you could need help just making your bed that day.

But whatever side of that spectrum, you still need strength from somewhere and you still need to get it from God. None of it is irrelevant, right? There is no, even if a battle is smaller than the next, it doesn't mean it's any less irrelevant. And I think that I was convincing myself that those little things throughout the day were irrelevant and it was just needy of me.

Okay, I'm going to tell you guys a quick story about a conversation I was having with a friend just quickly. She was telling me about how she was having this certain craving one day. And this is such a small little tiny like little detail of her day. But this just shows you how much God actually does really truly care about the little tiny details in your day. Whether you want to gaslight yourself and tell you that it's irrelevant or not, it's not. Every little thing in our days matters.

to God and he cares about. Right. But so she's telling me about how she's having this certain craving. And she was like, I, you know, I was sitting at this coffee shop and it was becoming lunchtime and, you know, I was working on my laptop and all of a sudden I had this craving for this certain type of food and it was totally random. There was nothing nearby of a restaurant that would, that would offer this kind of food. Right. So she's like, I don't even know where I could get this. Um,

whatever. I'll just let the craving pass. I'll probably just get something else for lunch. So then give it like 10 minutes later. And one of her girlfriends called her and was like, Hey, what are you doing? Have you eaten yet? And she's like, no, I haven't. And she's like, okay, well, I have some leftovers from my meal last night. You know, do you want this type of food? And it was literally exactly what she was craving. It was like this Mexican dish. And it was so,

unbelievable. The timing, how specific it was. Jesus was written all over that. Like God knew it seems so small, but this is how much he loves us, y'all. This is how much he loves us. This sounds so silly, but like he loves us so much that he even cares about satisfying our cravings for lunch. Like he literally thinks about every little detail in our days that he wants you to enjoy your lunch so much that he's gonna

Like even our little cravings. I mean, it's little things like that that seem so irrelevant, but no, God cares. He cares about your comfortability. He cares about your joy. He cares about you enjoying your life to the best of our abilities, right? To the most that we can while we're here on earth. He wants us to enjoy it.

Of course he does. He's created us and he's created this world and this universe, the stars and the skies and the mountains. I mean, yeah, he created it because he also finds joy in creating, right? He's a creative father. I mean, unbelievable artists. I mean, you've seen sunsets, you've seen the sunrise, right? You've seen a full sky of stars. You've seen a beautiful snowfall. You've seen the beauty in a lightning storm and rain, right? I mean,

He does it because he also just finds so much satisfaction and joy in creating. Okay. He's a creator, but he also does it for us. Y'all. He, he does like, he loves us that much where he gives us these things to enjoy. These are gifts to us. Right. And,

Even down to a Mexican dish. It sounds silly, but it's true, right? God knows the beauty in food. He knows how good food is. And he wants us to enjoy those things, the little tiny things. He thinks about all of it. I just thought that that was such a beautiful story. And it kind of intertwines to what gave me the courage to finally ask God for this one thing, this tiny little thing in my day. All right, y'all are going to laugh at me, but it relates, okay?

I've had the nastiest, most painful freaking canker sore on my lip. All right. Cause I got, I got such a bad habit of biting my lip. And one night I bit my lip a little too hard. I bled, you know, I got a boo-boo on my lip. Well, obviously now it's a little bit more prone to infection because I got an open wound on the inside of my mouth. Okay. Obviously it gets infected. It gets so bad y'all. And trust me, I'm

not a dirty person let me preface for a minute before no one wants to kiss me ever again I use plenty of mouthwash I brush my teeth twice a day I floss whatever it just got infected right I feel like I'm trying everything under the sun to make this thing go down I'm using salt water I'm using my mouthwash like nothing was working and it's in a part of my mouth like currently it's still here and it hurts but it's so much better today because Jesus thank you but it's in the

corner of my mouth so it's like actually extremely uncomfortable because anytime I need to like put food in my mouth I mean everything touches it and it's unbelievably painful it's like in the crack between my lips like the worst place to have one okay and it was even painful to talk most times right and I'm like if this ain't something right from the pits of hell like

Because I do so much talking. Look what we're doing. We're talking about the Holy Spirit. Like, I mean, I do so much talking for Jesus and what I do online. And it's been so painful to talk just the last few days. I've let this pain go on. Y'all, it's brought me to the point where I want to cry. It hurts so bad. Sounds dramatic, but whatever. Okay, y'all know the pain of a freaking canker sore. It stinks. And I let this go on for four days. I didn't pray to God about it at all. Because I was like...

why would I pray to God about a canker sore? I'm sorry, but there are just too many things going on in the world. There are too many bigger things. Like I can take care of this myself. I can get rid of this canker sore all by myself. I got my mouthwash, whatever. Obviously that wasn't working out of the host.

obviously that wasn't working. You were trying to handle this on your own. This is such a silly, small example, but I finally prayed to Jesus last night about it. And I said, okay. And I thought about that story of my girlfriend with the Mexican food. And it's like, God really does care about the smallest things. He's got to care about this canker sore. He loves me. Right. And I'm thinking,

even like, like any parent to their child. If your child's in pain, it's got an earache. If your child's got a freaking, yeah, like a canker sore or anything like that, where you, you visibly see your child in pain. It doesn't matter how small it is. You want to help them in that moment, right?

Of course you would. So why do I stop thinking of God as a loving father like anyone else would be on earth? I don't know. But I thought of him that way. And I remembered the story of what my girlfriend told me. And I said, you know what? If Jesus cares enough about her Mexican meal, he's going to care enough about the fact that I'm in so much freaking pain with this canker sore and it's holding me back. And I want to get back into talking and I want to just be calm.

comfortable. I want to be able to enjoy my meals again and not be in pain every time I put food in my mouth. So I said, Jesus, I pray, God, I need you. I need your healing. Even if you just brought it down to something where it was still at least bearable, like God help me with this canker sore. And

I woke up this morning. Now it's not gone. All right. God said, I'm not going to completely remove it, but I will bring it down to the point where it is no longer so painful that you can eat your food and you will be able to preach the gospel today. And I said, I shook his hand. No, I didn't. I gave him a big hug. Are you kidding? I gave him a big hug. And I said, thank you, God.

I woke up this morning, y'all, and immediately I could tell that there was a huge difference. I was in so much less pain. I'm in so much less pain today. And I give that to God. I do. It sounds so silly, again, like to think that he cares about the little things, but he does. He cares about the little things. He wants to help you with the small battles throughout the day. You know, he wants to help you with your big battles, but he wants to help you with every single obstacle that you face every day through every moment.

minute of the day. He wants to help you with every little thing, no matter how small you think it is. It's not too small. There is nothing too small or too big for God. And he wants to help you in everything, in everything. We don't always have to be in a crisis to feel like it's worth it for God to help us through it, right? We don't have to be in something so catastrophic, so huge to

that those are the only times that God has to help us. We are allowed to call on to our Lord even in the smallest battles and the smallest things that we struggle with, right? So I think that just speaks volumes to how thoughtful our God is and how much he cares for us. We can't even fathom it. We don't even understand it. I don't even understand it, you know? I don't think we understand how much he really does care about every minute of our days.

And as long as we are calling on to him and we have faith in him that he can truly help us in anything that we are facing, he will. He will. He will show up. One Bible verse that I want to use to back that up is also from Matthew. We read this on TikTok Live last night. It's Matthew 7, 7 through 8.

And it says, ask and it will be given to you. Seek and you will find. Knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks, receives. The one who seeks, finds. And to the one who knocks, the door will be opened. Y'all, God is literally promising us that

We can ask him and he will give it to us. He may not always give it to us in the way that we're asking for it though, right? Because even me with my canker sore, I really did say, God, hey, can I just wake up and it's gone? And he said, how about this?

I'm going to answer your prayer of being in less pain and being to the point where now you can speak again. And I'm also going to answer your prayer in the way where you're going to actually be able to eat food and enjoy it. And it's not going to hurt to open your mouth, but I'm not going to make it go away all the way. Right. But I'm going to answer your prayer. I'm just not going to answer it in the way that you asked for it because you think you know best, but I know better. So I love you and I want you to be comfortable and I'm going to answer your prayers right

But sometimes I feel like we put this expectation on God that he has to answer our prayers in the way that we think we need it. And so when we ask and it'll be given to us, it will. And that's a promise. But it doesn't always get given to us in the way that we think it will. Right. But he does.

I mean, he promises that to us and it is in black and white in the Bible. Ask and it will be given to you. Seek and you will find it. Knock and the door will be open to you for everyone who asks receives and the one who seeks finds. And to the one who knocks, the door will be open. The other part of that, y'all, is the huge part about asking from God is you have to seek.

You have to knock. You have to know him. You have to have a relationship with him. You have to have faith in him. All of that is the knock.

All of that is the knocking on the door and it'll open and the door will open and God will be on the other side. But you have to seek, you have to have faith in him, right? You have to have faith that he is going to answer your prayers and you have to have faith that he's going to answer your prayers in the way that is best for you. And that is God's way, right? He's going to answer your prayers, but on his terms and in the ways that he believes is best for us because he knows better.

Another piece of scripture from Matthew 21, 22. If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer. If you believe, that is the only agreement, right? The sentence doesn't just start at, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer. No, it's if you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer. We can pray to God in emptiness.

I mean, I was even, you know, the example I was giving y'all at the beginning of this podcast episode where I was telling Satan to buzz off in the name of Jesus. Sure, yeah, but was it empty? Was I just saying the word Jesus? Was I just saying empty words without actually having the belief behind it, without actually acknowledging Jesus in that, right? You have to believe. If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer. And I think sometimes that's

That's why so many of us feel like our prayers aren't being answered. Well, how fruitful are your prayers? Full of life, right? How full of belief are in your prayers? Now, when I say that, y'all, you don't have to have a ton of faith in God. You just have to have a little bit of faith. You just got to have faith in him. You got to have belief in him. But when God asks us to have faith in him, he doesn't ask us to have 150,000.

thousand percent faith in him. He's not like, okay, you have faith in me, but not enough. Sorry. No, God literally tells us, this is also from Matthew. Matthew's so good. Matthew 17, 20. If you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, move from here to there and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you. God is actually asking us not only to have faith. He says, just a little bit, just give me a little bit. Give me

faith as small as a mustard seed, which by the way is like the smallest seed you could ever find on the planet. It's a tiny, tiny little seed. It's small. It's a really, really small seed. It's like the size of an ant. God is saying that if you have faith as small as a mustard seed,

You can say to this mountain, move from here to there and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you. God just asks for faith. He doesn't tell us that we're supposed to have a certain amount of faith. I mean, having a lot of faith is good. And I think honestly, that is our ultimate goal at the end of this life is to serve God, be fruitful for the Lord, but also learn how to have more faith in him. And I think

that that is a huge purpose to our journey here on earth is to strengthen our relationship with the Lord more and more every day and just have more and more faith in him. So we continue to learn more about the creator that we will meet on the other side before we meet him. You know, it's like, I just think that growing our faith is so important, but God doesn't tell us we have to have a ton of faith all the time. We just have to have faith.

You just have to have faith as small as a mustard seed, as big as a mustard seed. He just wants faith. Any size, any amount, he can work with any of it. He can work with faith, but he can't work with no faith. He can't work through you or for you. He can't bless you. He can't answer your prayers if there is no faith. If there's no faith, he can't do anything with that. But you know who can do anything with that? You know who can work with that?

is Satan. You got no faith? That is the perfect recipe for the enemy. God can't do anything with no faith, but the enemy can and he will drag you down with him. But if you just have faith as big as a mustard seed, the size of a tiny little seed, God can do something with that. God can work miracles with that. Y'all, I gotta tell you a really cool statistic about what a mustard seed

God is so good. God is so good. He is so intentional with every word in the Bible. Y'all, you want to know another reason why he uses a mustard seed as an example in the Bible is because the mustard seed is so tiny. It's honestly like it looks like a little sesame seed. Like it's that small, right? Did you know that a mustard seed can actually grow to be as tall as 20 to 30 feet?

With branches and leaves spanning across another 20 feet circumference. So from this little house,

Okay, Holy Spirit from this little tiny seed this little piece of faith when I tell you that you know our faith throughout our lives will continue to grow from this little tiny freaking mustard seed you can get a tree that is 20 to 30 feet tall and outwards of 20 feet circumference after all the branches grow out that is a ginormous tree how in the world

in the world can a tree that big come from a seed that small? That's how God works on us. That is how our faith evolves throughout our lives. And that is why we go through these trials and tribulations through the enemy is because God always makes good out of all evil. So anything that the

enemy tries to pull on you, any, any lie that he tries to tell you, any obstacle, any hardship, anything that's taken from you in your life by the enemy. God brings so much goodness from that. And he grows our faith to the point where we are now standing tall as a 20 to 30 feet tall

giant tree with huge branches. That's what God makes out of it. That's what God makes out of it. Y'all, let me tell you, I've been yapping so much that I have hardly even taken a sip from my coffee at all. If that's not good, y'all, do not feel guilt. Do not feel like you could ever let God down. The other thing is like, whenever

we slip up, whenever we make mistakes, whenever we don't prioritize God nearly as much as he deserves, he already knew about our sin before we were going to do it. You can't throw him off. You can't catch God off guard. He's God. So the other thing we need to remember is that God knew what we were going to do before we were even going to do it. He knows what you're going to do tomorrow. He knows about your entire life. He knows every single day, every single hour, every single minute.

of our lives. He already knows the choices we're going to make before we make them. So I think this is a reminder to myself, but hopefully to y'all too, that you could never disappoint him because you could also never, you just can't catch him off guard. There isn't anything that you do that he couldn't have already predicted or already knew. It's not even a prediction. He just knows.

And so if you feel like you're allowing the enemy to tell you that you're not enough for God, you don't treat him well enough, you neglect him, that you disappoint him, please tell the freaking devil to buzz off and make sure the door hits him on the way back.

Because those are lies sent straight from the pits of hell. And it is not true. God loves you. He's forgiven you for everything already before you even do them. He's already forgiven you and he loves you regardless. You can never disappoint him. You can never let him down. He just wants your time. He wants your love and he wants your faith. And...

We can fall off track and sometimes we will listen to the devil. Sometimes we'll allow him in our home and it's scary, but God is not disappointed in you. He's not disappointed in me. And at the end of the day is like, he also knows your heart.

right? I've said this before, but God knows your heart. He knows your heart. And he knows that at the end of the day, you just want to do the best you can for him. And as long as you're telling him that, and you're talking to him, even through the trials, like that's all he wants. He just wants that relationship with you. And so I think that's just the biggest thing. That's the

biggest lesson that I've learned this week and I'm honestly so grateful that it was something I had to go through this week because I think a lot of people needed to hear this and so I just thank God right now for turning this around and showing me the truth so that I can also you know use it as a testimony to

anyone who's listening that they are not alone in those feelings. And again, the devil doesn't really have that many tactics. He's kind of got the same moves that he does over and over again and he does it on all of us. He does it on literally all of us. He may do it in a

approach, but it's the same thing every time. He wants you to doubt yourself and doubt your relationship with God. He wants to take your confidence. He wants to strip you of your relationship with the Lord. And so if there's anything that is running through your mind, if there's anything that you're telling yourself that is something that could be

jeopardize how close you are with the Lord right now or how close you could be with the Lord. You better rebuke that in the name of Jesus. You better tell it to go on its miserable way. Kick it out.

The other thing that I think is really important too is if you feel like you're under some serious spiritual warfare or you feel like the enemy is attacking you more than usual, I would like to tell you that I think that that is also a clear indication that there is so much good around the corner for you. God knows it and the enemy also knows it. And as long as the enemy can hold you back,

and try to take you to a place where either you miss it, you don't see it, or he can ruin it for you, he will. He will. And I think the biggest thing for me right now is in current time of me recording this, I'm about to make my move to Nashville. I just know that God has so many blessings for me in that city. I know that he's got a community plan for me. I'm about to be connected with people, you know, who are believers and just love the Lord so much. I know that the city is going to be so good for me. And it's just going to be a really great chapter for

for me in my life and my walk with God. And I have been feeling this. And I think a huge reason is because there is so much goodness around the corner. I don't even know what God has planned for me, but I know that there's gotta be goodness because it's where God's taking me. And y'all, it's confirmation. If you feel the devil coming after you so much, you're doing something right. There is confirmation in that.

There is confirmation that there is so much goodness coming or you're in that goodness right now. You are thriving in your relationship with the Lord. It is something and it is making the devil so scared. And something to remember about the devil is that if he's fighting, it is because he is scared.

If he is fighting and he is trying so hard to get to you, it is because you are a threat and you are scary to him. Do you understand? Do you understand that we are actually scary to the devil? The devil isn't scary. We are scary to him, y'all. You are making him shake in his boots for prioritizing your relationship with the Lord for whatever it is you're doing in your life. Whatever it is you're doing in your life or whatever you're about to do, you're scaring him.

And so when the devil is scared, he fights, he fights and he tries to distract you and he tries to bring you down. So don't let him bring you down today. Don't let him bring you down tomorrow. And please stay in the word, y'all. Please read your freaking Bibles. That is the biggest lesson I've learned. Read your Bible. It'll bring you back to life.

And it's like working out, you know, like, you know how good working out makes you feel. And then for some reason we dread it every time. And it's like, why do I dread working out when I know how good it makes me feel? Why do I dread reading my Bible when I know how good it makes me feel after? Like, why? Why do we dread the things that make us feel so good afterwards? Probably because it's work.

Probably because it's work. Probably because it's easier to just give in to the devil and just listen to his lies and just let him take over because it's easier. That's why it's not easy to follow Christ. It's not easy to follow the Lord because it's way easier to sin. It's way easier to listen to the lies. I think it's because it's just hard. But in a lot of ways, the hard thing is usually always the best thing for us.

Anyway, I hope that this spoke some serious life into somebody. Into somebody, if not all of y'all. It spoke life into me. I thank the Holy Spirit. I thank God for being present in this podcast. I know y'all felt him. I felt him. I felt him. He was here and he was preaching and I'm just grateful for that. I'm so grateful for y'all. Thank you for tuning in to another episode this Friday. I hope that you guys have been loving this podcast. It has truly been fulfilling me in every way, shape, or form. Like, I mean, it has been so...

And I'm just grateful. I'm grateful, y'all. And also, this was a new feature, actually, that I didn't even know was possible. It's so funny because I had, you know, Girly Popcast for the past couple years. And I didn't even know that this was an option. I've gone all this time without ever using it. But there is an option to actually give and support the podcast. So I've never said this because I didn't even put it together until...

like a couple days ago. I had no idea this was an option, but you can actually give to the podcast. There is going to be a link in the description of this episode that you can click on to give. It also is linked in the bio on our Instagram and the bio on our TikTok page. So if you follow us on socials, you will see that link there. And I'm not big on asking people to give or

you know, or for generosity. But I figured that I would just let y'all know that the option was there. And if, yeah, if there's anything that you would like to do, you could just literally donate. I mean, I think the least amount you could give is 99 cents. You could just give a dollar, but it means a lot. And yeah,

If you want to support the podcast, that is definitely a way to support it. And we would truly appreciate it so much. Another way to support the podcast is to write it a five-star review. Please give us a review as well. It means so much. It really helps the podcast. It helps boost it. But in any way that you can support us,

I just appreciate it because I just want to continue to grow this podcast. I want to continue to grow this space and I just want the Holy Spirit to reach so many people y'all. I want this community to be so big not for my own selfish reasons, but for Jesus for Jesus. I want this community to be so big in the name of God and for God. I just can't wait to see where God takes this podcast. And yeah, I just appreciate y'all so much. I'm praying for y'all and hey guys.

I also want to just say, why don't you go show somebody why Jesus is so cool this week? Can you do that? Can you go show somebody why Jesus is so cool today? Spread his love, spread his grace, spread his generosity, spread his kindness, spread his patience, spread his empathy. Let's all walk a little bit more like Jesus today. I love y'all and I'll see you next week. Bye.

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