cover of episode Hallie Batchelder: Billionaires, Boobs & Black Cards

Hallie Batchelder: Billionaires, Boobs & Black Cards

2024/12/4
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Alex Cooper:采访Hallie Batchelder,话题涵盖了她与亿万富翁的约会经历、隆胸手术、使用父亲的信用卡、以及她独特的性观念和经历。Alex Cooper还分享了她和Hallie在洛杉矶和波士顿的趣事,以及对Hallie性格的评价。访谈中,Alex Cooper还穿插了一些广告和赞助商内容。 Hallie Batchelder:Hallie Batchelder讲述了她如何巧妙地让两个男人为她的隆胸手术买单,以及她与朋友男友发生关系的经历。她还分享了她对约会的看法,坦诚地承认自己仍在使用父亲的信用卡,并透露自己拥有棕色腰带的空手道水平。她还讲述了一些她遇到的最疯狂的性要求,以及她对醉酒后行为的描述。Hallie Batchelder还谈到了她对性开放的态度,以及她对性关系中的一些看法。她还分享了她怀孕和堕胎的经历,以及她对父亲信用卡使用的看法。她还谈到了她对性开放的态度,以及她对性关系中的一些看法。 Hallie Batchelder: Hallie Batchelder详细描述了她与不同年龄段男性的性经历,包括她与一位富有的对冲基金经理的关系,以及她如何处理与已婚男性发生关系的情况。她还分享了她对性关系中的一些看法,以及她对性开放的态度。她还讲述了她如何巧妙地让两个男人为她的隆胸手术买单,以及她与朋友男友发生关系的经历。她还分享了她对约会的看法,坦诚地承认自己仍在使用父亲的信用卡,并透露自己拥有棕色腰带的空手道水平。她还讲述了一些她遇到的最疯狂的性要求,以及她对醉酒后行为的描述。

Deep Dive

Key Insights

Why did Hallie Batchelder sign up for Seeking Arrangements?

After a party where a friend vomited on her parents' expensive carpet and the cops were called, her dad was so mad that she thought she was cut off for good. This led her to sign up for Seeking Arrangements as a desperate measure.

What is Hallie Batchelder's most controversial opinion about sex?

She believes that anal sex can be pleasant and has had more anal experiences than vaginal ones in her sexual encounters.

How did Hallie Batchelder finance her breast augmentation surgery?

She received $10,000 from a man and his friend via Venmo for the surgery, but ultimately her parents paid for it after she got her real estate license.

What is the weirdest thing someone has asked Hallie Batchelder to do in bed?

A man asked her to use a rifle to masturbate and accidentally shoot her head off, as described in a short story he wrote about her.

How does Hallie Batchelder describe her personality when she's drunk?

She either goes mute, making it unclear if she's drunk or not, or becomes an extra version of her extra self, being very chill and respectful of the vibes.

What is Hallie Batchelder's experience with chlamydia?

She contracted chlamydia from an older man she was seeing, who was rich and took her to the Bahamas. She thought the chlamydia pill was postponing her period, leading to a double misunderstanding.

How does Hallie Batchelder feel about oversharing on the Internet?

She believes oversharing is part of her identity and while it can lead to repercussions, it also builds character and is a real life experience.

What is Hallie Batchelder's favorite sex position?

She prefers being on top because it's the quickest and easiest way to get the encounter over with, especially with her new breast implants.

How does Hallie Batchelder handle being cut off from her dad's credit card?

She received a text from her dad informing her that he canceled the JetBlue card, which she used frequently. She reacted with surprise and humor, noting that the black card is still available.

What is the most expensive thing a man has ever bought Hallie Batchelder?

A man and his friend each Venmoed her $5,000 for her breast augmentation surgery, thinking they were each paying for one breast.

Shownotes Transcript

Translations:
中文

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What is up, Daddy Gang? It is your founding father, Alex Cooper, with Call Her Daddy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Ooh, yeah. Hey, tonight's about to get weird. Okay, cheers. Let's do a quick little prayer. Let's do a quick little seance. Um...

Our father who are in color daddy, how highly be thy saying a lot of bad shit tonight.

Thy kingdom come. I will make him come. And I will not sound dumb. Amen. That's not a prayer. No, yeah. That's my new religion. Do you think any of your exes will be watching tonight? Hopefully, if they have a phone. Those poor brokies. Those little weird freaks. Do you go for broke men? Sometimes. To humble myself. Yeah.

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Hallie Batchelder, welcome to Call Her Daddy. You may be wondering why we're dressed like this, Daddy Gang. I don't know. No, we're like back. We're like, we're in New York right now. You're back to your roots. Oh my gosh. Imagine if we knew each other when I was in New York. No, you would be dead. No. You wouldn't be alive. I wouldn't have my career. Yeah, I'd be at your funeral and you wouldn't have your career or your husband. I would definitely not have my husband if I knew you were in New York. You would definitely not have your husband.

We also, imagine if we knew each other when we lived in Boston. No. I wouldn't have been a bottle girl. I would have just become friends with your dad. Imagine if I had fucked your dad.

Wait, that's not funny. Isn't he happily married? No, he's happily married. But like, imagine if Alex Cooper was my mom and I was like, Alex, what's for dinner? She's like, I just signed a $125 million deal. Let me just preface this with anybody that's driving in the car on the way to work because they could be on their way to work. They could be nursing their child right now. Hopefully not. They could be doing something wholesome. It is about seven o'clock at night in Los Angeles, California. It's so hot. No, it's so hot. We

are sweating and we're drinking martinis and I'm sitting across from Hallie now I discovered Hallie on TikTok one day and I said I'd like that bitch I would like to be friends with that bitch and then I ended up starting a company and I was like oh I can be friends with her and I can work with her which is pretty cool and Hallie is going to be launching her podcast which

Tomorrow, Extra Dirty, episode one comes out. So cheers. You fucking did it, bitch. Should we take this shit off? Maybe not the sunglasses, but at least this. No, I'm overheating. And then let's re-comb your hair. I look like George Washington III. Last time I saw you was in Los Angeles. Yes. And Matt and I were putting you to bed. Yes. That was the scariest thing ever because I was crossfaded on that fucking PJ back.

Talk about that experience. No. They were like, yay, yay. I don't know. Like, Wiz was playing, like, his music. And I was like, okay. Like, and you were like, yeah. And he was like, wait, have the whiskey and smoke the blunt. And I, like, don't smoke weed at all. So when I hit it, I was, like, so paranoid. I think Sweetie thanked me for being there. I go, you're welcome. I'm like, I don't know.

so we're on the plane I turn around and Hallie has her hands crossed in a prayer position and she's not moving and she's not speaking and she's not making eye contact with anyone and I kept turning around being like Hallie are you well I'm like with my like boss this girl that just signed me to the company and like I was just I I don't smoke at all like I'm not a smoker I don't smoke weed I don't like downers like that I like uppers

So I was like a little confused what was going on. I was trying to play it fucking cool. And I was supposed to go from landing from the PJ. And I was like, my plan was to Uber to LAX. And I'm like, what time is your flight? I've never heard of a flight taking off at like a steady 2.30. And Hallie's like, oh, I don't have a flight. I'm going to get one though.

And she is blazed out of her mind, not making eye contact with anyone still. And she has glasses on and she's like, no, I'm going to catch a flight. To which Matt says, excuse me, you're not going to LAX. You're coming home with us. I was like, yay. I mean, the thing is, I woke up in your guest bed on top of the covers. I didn't even take my clothes off. Didn't even tuck in. You had given me a whole house tour that I don't even recall.

I woke up and there was like a desktop right in front of me. I clicked the name and it goes Alex Cooper desktop. And I go, no, not today. And it was like noon and I could hear you guys downstairs making coffee and I was like calling like Lauren. I was calling all my friends being like, I don't know if I can go downstairs. This is terrible. This is like a...

Like, this is a nightmare. No, that was fun. No, that was fun. How would you describe your personality when you're drunk, aside from the wandering eye? Creep. You fucking bitch. I feel like either I go mute, like, you don't know if I'm, like, drunk or not, or I'm just, like, completely...

an extra version of my extra self. I don't want to cause a scene. I'm not like confrontational at all. Some people when they get drunk they're like mean and rude and confrontational. Maybe yeah I'm very chill. I'm also like very like a respectful human being. I feel like I'm just like down with like the vibes. I'm just trying to like I don't want to cause a scene. Are you someone that is going to drunk text people?

Are you a drunk texter? Yeah. Oh, yeah. I mean, like, who's not? Like, I don't know, like, grow up. Wait, but I, like, have had a couple, like, drunk text situations where I'm just, like...

so there's me there needs to be a child lock on my phone yeah yeah you know once i send this nude to this guy and it was a video it was like a cinematic masterpiece and i was using like a bright pink fuchsia dildo and i was absolutely plastering myself with it what are you in your bed yeah my twin bed on nantucket oh yes you're doing this and i sent it to the wrong

Guy. His name started with M. The other guy's name started with M. But the guy I sent it to was like this guy named Matt from like sleepaway camp when I was 14. And I was like, he had a blessed day that day. I don't fucking care. Did you realize that when you were fucked up or did you realize in the morning? In the morning, he thumbs upped it. He didn't even reply.

He must have known this ain't for me. He was like, yeah. In that moment, question, do you then decide cinematic masterpiece, should I actually now fire this off to the right person? It's too late. It was too late. The person I wanted to even fire it off to, I think, didn't deserve it. I think this random guy from sleepaway camp deserved it more at this point. Yeah.

But my drunk texts weren't even like, where you at? They were just like, very well composed, like, sexed with like an intro, three supporting arguments and like a closing statement. I'd be like, this is a cinematic. I wouldn't even regret that. I'm going to die on this hill. Someone publish this shit. How the fuck are you like writing that shit when you're fucked up? AI, chat GBT, give it to me right now. One, two, three.

Allie, I fucking love you. OK, where did you come from? Like, I feel like you crawled out of a hole. Like, were your parents strict with you growing up? Like, what was going on? I mean, they weren't strict at all. I feel like they had expectations. Like, you had to get good grades, make your bed, don't get pregnant. Although I did once. But like, don't get pregnant.

Okay, so my parents can be strict sometimes. Oh, okay. Like when I would throw parties in college, there was one time I threw a party in college and I had all my friends over. It was like for my friend's birthday. And like one of her girlfriends like threw up all over my parents' carpet. The cops had came, so everyone was like hiding in a room.

They went up to like the fourth floor. I live in like a brownstone in Boston. They went to the fourth floor into my parents' room. This girl threw up all over like my parents, like $100,000 carpet. It was horrid. It was a fucking crime scene. Okay.

So they found out. I've never seen my dad so mad at me. I thought I was cut off for good. I thought I was cut off for good. So I signed up for seeking arrangements. I was being the most. I was so extra. I was like seeking arrangements near me. I'm done. There's no way. Holly. I never went on a date, but I signed up.

You know, I got chlamydia once. Let's talk about chlamydia. Oh, sorry. Tell me about your time. I mean, I got chlamydia once. It was with an older gent who I loved. I didn't love him. I just loved how rich he was. I don't know. He was so rich. Like we'd go to like a bar and he'd be like, what do you want to drink? And I'd be like, I want a spicy margarita. And he'd be like, I'll get a spicy margarita too. And then he'd be like, how much should I tip?

a thou? Should I tip a thou? He like abbreviated a thou and I was like tip a thou yay yay yay. And then he invited me to the Bahamas and his friend had a private island and it was just all the things. His name was Epstein. No. No I'm just kidding I'm sorry. This is going this is getting weird. His name was Diddy. No stop. No but he would like fly. How old was this man? He wasn't that old he was like 38. Hmm.

How old were you at the time? 23. Oh, okay. That's good. That's good. He was weathered, though. He looked stressed out. He looked like a leather couch. He looked like he was stressed out at work. What was he up to? What did he do for work? He was a hedge fund owner. Owner? Wait, that's hot. Wait, owner? Is that a thing? CEO. How did you meet him? Nantucket.

That's and he didn't have children or kids? He could have. Could have. He got me pregnant. He got you pregnant? Yes, that was the same guy in chlamydia. But I thought the chlamydia pill was postponing my period. So it was like double homicide. What?

Can I not say that? You know what? I think you fucking should say that because in the state of the motherfucking union of our country, you had a right. And thank God I was able to have an abortion back then. Honestly, I can't even imagine if it wasn't an option to me. Imagine you as a mother right now. Like right here. I'm like, hi, Father Cooper. I'm doing an interview. I have big tits. Can I even breastfeed? Wait, oh, can you?

I think so. It's under the muscle. I continue. Okay. You know, you, that's what I remember you drunkenly in the back of the car with Matt and I on our way back. You're like, guys, I have something I really want to talk to you about. And I'm like, oh, we're gonna talk about extra dirty, whatever. You're like, I kind of want to go bigger. I was like,

I stand by this. You want to go bigger? Yeah. How big are your tits? Well, they're, all right, 295cc high profile. And everyone thinks they're real. Everyone thinks they're real. No, like when, like, oh my God. Like, everyone thinks they're real. They don't like fake. Because the tits I had before, I gained a lot of weight, then lost a lot of weight, and then gained a lot of weight. So it kind of looked like a rock in a sock. Like, picture a rock in a sock.

You know, you're swinging a rock and a sock. It's like a weapon. Okay. So like I filled that up and I went conservative with the CCs, but they don't look fake enough. If I'm going under the knife, pop it up. Make them look fake. You want to go bigger. They bounce still. Like fuck that. You don't want them to bounce. Not really. You want them to just be. I want to be sat in listening to me.

Wait, you went to Catholic school? Yeah. It's shocking. That literally makes so much sense. I went to Catholic school also, so I can say that. Oh, yeah. Just a lot of repression. It's like caging a wild animal and then setting them free into college. From 5th through 12th grade, I never had class with a male. I had slept with one guy.

And I had done like one line of Adderall. And I was like, I'm a freak. I'm so crazy. And then I got to college and I was like, wait, dick? That's insane. So high school, you were pretty tame. So tame. What was your first boyfriend? He was like this very religious, went to the brother's school, all boys Catholic school, was like captain of the hockey team. Very nice guy, very religious. Massive dick. I know. I miss him. Okay. Okay.

Where is he now, you think? He has a girlfriend. Oh. He's like 5'7". Aren't you 5'8"? In grass. 5 foot. But the big dick. He was a tripod, Alex. The walking tripod. If the wind gusted him right over, he would be standing right up.

But to have that as your first experience is a little intimidating, though. A little intimidating for everyone else. Like, after him, it was like, what is this? What did I sign up for? Why did we break up? I was like, upsetting. The second guy I got with after my ex...

Had a micro penis. Literally my pinky. What did you do when you saw it? It wasn't a seeing it thing. It was like, is it in yet? Is it in yet? I had no idea. It was like this big. I swear to God. You've actually tried to have sex with a micro penis. I did have sex with a micro penis. What position worked the best? None of them. I was on a bean bag in my friend's common room in college. So disgusting. Can we talk about karate? Yeah.

Kumbaya. The karate kid is here today. No, guys. It's a fun fact that I am a brown belt in karate. I did it for nine years. I wasn't like an athlete. You weren't going to see me in soccer or hockey or I don't know what other sports. Track. No, like none of them. My parents were like, you should do karate. And like that's a sport you put your kids into when you're like three. Yeah.

And I was out popping my fucking pussy until I was probably 17. Hold on. I'm a brown belt. Did you get like bullied for this? Yes. So I for a period I stopped and then I accidentally before sweet 16 got alcohol poisoning because I was 14. I'm youngest my grade.

So it was like before I was 16, I like drank too much. And my parents like, you're grounded for nine months and you have to do karate. And I was like, all right, fuck. And I'm like 14, like guys are just starting to notice me. And I have to go back and put my gi on. I'm like a little brown belt. And I'm like, I'm like, cool. Yeah. And like, I'm like, guys aren't going to fuck with this. It's true. Give me like a hand move. What would you do? You'd bow first. Be respectful. Yeah.

I can't really get into the grooves. I used to do the job. I used to judge younger karate students. What? I was that good. I was so good at karate. Do you use any of those moves in the bedroom? Probably. I'm violent in the bedroom. A man hates to see me coming. Hallie, can we talk about your dad? Yeah. Let's talk about the finances. Let's talk about the finances. Are you still using your dad's credit card to this day?

I mean, yeah, I mean, it's actually a sensitive topic today. I got a text this morning being like in the group chat. My dad goes, I just canceled the JetBlue card. Good luck. Love you to my family group chat. I go, wait, what the absolute fuck? He goes, I don't use it anymore. I'm like, but I do.

What do you mean? What is the JetBlue card? Like his card, we all have an Apple Pay. But it's like Monopoly. It's like bang, bang. It's like, oh, bang. We're at dinner. Bang. You know, I could fly around the world 17 times. So you got cut up on the JetBlue. No, yeah, we're done. The black card, we're so back. The black card hates to see me coming.

It's nice that he's not a sugar daddy. Like, this is your actual dad. Yeah, it's the sugar daddy minus the sugar. Do you think he'll ever cut you off? No, because, like, he really wants us to be safe. He's big on safety. Like, the reason why he would never, like, disclose his credit card number for the black card, he does not let us do subway transportation or UberX. Like, it's over. I'm not kidding. Like, he, like, doesn't feel safe with that.

He also doesn't feel safe with us having a bad haircut or bad hair or like bad clothing. He doesn't feel safe, Alex. He protects our safety. I literally can't handle you. Okay, so it's all about safety. Yeah. A new bag, safety. Yeah. New hair, safety. But also like nice interior design makes me feel safe. Yeah.

CB2, safety. William Sonoma, safety. Revolve, safety. Revolve makes me feel safety. So let me get this right. Do you have a, like, you can't spend more than this in a month or no? I'm not disrespectful. I don't abuse it. It's not like I'm going to Bergdorf and, like, popping my absolute pussy at Bergdorf while he's not there. Yeah. But when I'm there, we're popping our fucking pussy at Bergdorf.

If you ever go too hard, what is like a reprimand from your father look like? It's an email. What? It's an email where it says purchase activity not detected or like purchase activity. I wasn't there. And he sends a question mark and we just usually don't reply. Stop. I'm like trash. Spam. I'm like who is this? Okay, let's talk about your dating life.

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Amazon Music Unlimited. Download the Amazon Music app now to start listening. Terms apply. Okay, let's talk about your dating life. Do you have an age limit? Diapers. Is that bad to say? What's funny is I was thinking like 85, 65. Yeah, diapers. Oh, you're talking about old man. Yeah, an old man with diapers, hospice, diapers. Diapers.

Wait, what? You thought I was talking about the younger? That's a problem. We have to talk about that after. Okay, that was weird for me. Can you tell me what is the oldest you've gone on a date with? Date? Or fucked? I don't know. The oldest guy I've slept with? I don't date a lot. Okay, right. Sorry. No dates. Just fuck. But the oldest guy I've slept with is probably 52. Okay. How was that? Good. For him. Okay.

I sucked him sideways in fruition. He saw the sunset. Was he single? I think. Have you ever had sex with a man and then realized he was married afterwards? Yes. How do you handle that? I mean, that's not my problem. If you are hooking up with me and like you're in a relationship and you don't disclose it, I don't see how that's like my issue. It's not your issue. What is the most expensive thing a man has ever bought you aside from your father? That's a good question, actually. Yeah.

I mean, these guys, this man thought he bought my tits. What? This is actually a really good story. Share with the class. So this is the guy I was seeing at the time. He was in London. I remember FaceTiming him. He was horrible to me. Like, he'd be like, I'm getting with this influencer and that influencer. I'm like, OK, but I'm like, I'm so cool with that, whatever. And I would be like, I think I want like new tits. And he was like, I think I agree with that. Like, he was horrible to me.

And then he goes, he's like, it's 6 a.m. in London. I'm so fucked up. I've stayed up all night. Like, I'm going to Venmo you 10 grand for your tits. So him and his best friend Venmo me for each tit. So they each think they own one tit. But then... Wait, they Venmoed you? Yeah, they Venmoed me on the spot. Him and his friend? Yeah. But then my mom was like, wait, if you really want me to pay for the surgery, just get your real estate license.

And I'll pay for it. So like MacGyver on the fucking keyboards. I studied so hard. I got my real estate license and like within like a week and a half. I swear to God. And these fucking dumbass billionaires. I pocketed their money so quick. See you fucking later. You had 10K for your tits from them. Yeah. And my parents just paid for them. I never sold a house ever either. Yeah.

I fucking love that for you. No. Have you ever signed an NDA? Yeah. Oh. Haven't you? Like what? Tuesday. For like a. I know you can't talk about it, but not for like business. I've never signed an NDA. I don't know. Shake said yes. Yeah. I mean, I've signed a couple, but like for like guys, I don't even think deserve them. Like YouTube guys. I'm like, be so fucking for real right now. You signed an NDA for me, babe. No.

Have you fucked someone that does YouTube? Multiple. I show my own channel. No. Wait, but you've never fucked David Dobrik, have you? I'm taking out my sunglasses for this. Ew! Okay. Are you fucking kidding me? My eyes are like, where am I? Okay. Wait, my eyes are like, where am I? Wait, yeah, where am I? Wait, you thought I fucked David Dobrik? No, no. I'm out of here. Can we keep that in?

What is the weirdest thing that someone has asked you to do in bed? You know, what is the weirdest thing? Probably the weirdest thing, guys, anything ass related. This one guy got on all fours and he was arching his back and I was eating his ass out. I didn't love that for me. You love that for him. Also, there was this one guy that had the extension bar. I told you about this. No, this guy.

me up talk about it go i'm gonna no i'm not this is hog tie was fucking light work the hog tie was not even the part i just part of the story i didn't even explain this guy had an extension bar and he had shit like i hope you can see this right now he had like the clanks here and the clanks on each ankle and there was a bar in between my legs

And if you move your legs like another inch, you can't go back in. So if you move your legs another inch, you can't go back in. So I was in like the splits for like three and a half hours. And I swear to God, I was on a flight back from L.A. like cross-eyed dislocated. Let me just say this. Hallie and I are sitting next to each other in L.A. having a cocktail. Bessies. We're whispering sweet nothings to each other. No, like I love you. I'm asking her just about her escapades.

And she starts talking about this machine, essentially. It was giving Home Depot PR haul. It's like a curtain rod between her fucking legs. But there's a spring. And when you said that, so are you, is this happening when you're getting fucked from behind? No. So I was on my back in the hog tie. That's what made it crazier. The hog tie was in front.

And I felt like a chandelier at one point. Yeah. He put the bar over his neck at one point and then flipped me over. It was like, I can't move your legs. I thought I pulled a hamstring, Alex. I thought I was needed PT after this. Wait, what? I had recently watched the Jake Gyllenhaal show. Oh, you thought I was about to say that?

I got a video of it. I was like, I wouldn't be shocked. No, I, while she was explaining this to me, had watched the Jake Gyllenhaal show. If any of you had watched it, it's like presumed innocence. And the girl is murdered and she's wrapped up in a hog tie.

So aside from a hog tie, what is like a weird thing, like a weird thing that would make like Hallie Batchelder be like that definitely was on the Richter scale of like weird that a man has done to me. I mean, nothing makes me blush, but this one thing made me fear for many lives. I'm not going to lie. Like this man was love bombing the absolute fuck out of me.

In a way where I was like... Aware it was happening. But there was one night he called me. And he always would call me. Spend two hours on the phone. Talking about fucking nonsense. I don't know what the fuck he's talking about. I'm trying to go to bed or order Uber Eats. I don't know what the fuck you're saying. So he called me up and he's like...

I wrote a short story about you. And I'm like, oh my God, like trying to be like so cutesy and like interested. What was it about? And he's like, I wrote it about you. And like you were my muse. And I was like, I've never been a muse before. Really? Tell me everything. I'm like, tell me everything. Every fucking detail. This story was basically like this random girl gets set up with this guy that works on a ranch and they go on a first date. It's a blind date.

And like he like teaches people how to shoot a gun. And she's like, I'm scared of guns. Anyways, she's like, whatever. They continue dating and she keeps using the gun to like masturbate, like fuck herself with the gun. She's like popping her pussy with the gun while he goes to work.

Okay. And I was like, okay, this is a really good story. So he's like, yeah, like then she uses the gun. It's like a rifle to pop her pussy out of work. Anyways. Where is this going? One day, the end of the story was he walks in because he forgot his wallet or something. And she's like using the rifle to masturbate and accidentally shoots her whole fucking head off. Like, pfft.

I go, that's so sweet. What? I'm like, we're so in love. So I'm like, this girl blows her brains out. And I'm, I'm amused. I'm like, what?

I'm like, I've never even talked about masturbating with this guy. But all of a sudden, I am popping my pussy with a rifle. Dude. Isn't that fucking insane? I feel... So, like, he walks in and, like... It's like, he, like... She's like, oh, my God. He walks in. Like, what? Here's the thing. I do feel like...

Life is about how you handle moments. And I do feel like of any woman in the world, for a man to share that kind of short story, you are the type of person that could maybe handle it better than another woman. Because some bitches would just literally start crying on the phone, being like, why would you tell me this? But you're like, it's okay, baby. I said thank you. Wowie. Yeah.

And then when you got off the phone, do you like call your friends or do you just like pick back up? That one's I mean, like I can like handle a fucking weird, weird, like dirty text or whatever. But like a weird two hour story about like how I blew my head off with a rifle via via masturbating. I didn't really know how to handle. So, yes, I called my best friends. I was like, I don't know how to handle this one. I'm about to visit him, whatever.

And they're like, honestly, period. And I was like, period, per. Let's still do it. I still visited him and I came. Hallie? Yeah. Hallie. Alex? No. I couldn't get on that flight. I'm too paranoid I'd think he was going to fucking kill me. I mean, your podcast is going to be fucking insane. You're literally lounging like...

Which story should I tell about him? The hog ties? I wouldn't even consider that bad sex. That was good sex. You enjoyed that. I like that. What is the worst sex you've ever had? Or what would you consider bad sex? There was this one guy I hooked up with where he had like this weird baby fetish. Like where he thought it was like a doll.

Or like a baby doll. And he was like, oh, my pretty little princess. My little girl. My little pretty little princess. And I was like, who the fuck do you think you're talking to? He's like, just my pretty little princess. And I be talking bad. And I was like, do you need to be fucking murdered? Because I don't know what the fuck you're talking about right now. No, that's the type of shit I'm not into. Freak of the week. I'm going to ask you some rapid fire. Okay. Who is the most famous person in your DMs?

You know this.

You can't say it. You want me to say it? No way. Or do we want to let you like hook up with him first and then? Yeah, I mean, I don't want people to hook up. I mean, like there's a lot of famous people on my DMs. How do you handle that? Do you like that? No. Well, I mean, they're all fucking weirdo losers. I feel like as a grown up, I feel like I'm like, oh, it'd be so cool to like fuck a famous guy. And then you're like, oh, these famous people are fucking weird freaks. Like Scott Disick. Get out of my DMs. I know.

You weird fucking weird freak. Okay, have you ever hooked up with your friend's boyfriend? Yeah. Well, like, it's Memorial Day weekend.

And like she can send it. I mean like she was like suck him sideways. I said I'll suck him diagonal. No. Can I tell the story? Yeah. You tell the story. But I won't tell who it is. No. Like please tell the story because I want to tell the story so bad. I think it's hilarious. It shows how close me and Lauren are. She loves this story. Is she okay with it going public? Okay.

So Hallie and I are with Lauren and we're with Graydon and I don't know what happened but we all started talking about sucking dick and then all of a sudden you guys both turned to me and you had this like sadistic grin on and you're both like oh my god should we show her and I'm like show me what you're like let's show her and Lauren was like show her you go I need another drink before you show me.

And then you took like a massive gulp of a drink and you go, OK, I'm ready. They pull up their phone and they go, this is a video of Hallie sucking my boyfriend's dick. And I'm filming it. And I'm like, hold on, hold on. Just for context, Daddy Gang, her Lauren is my Lauren. Like they are best friends. They do everything together. And how long have Lauren and her boyfriend been together? Four years. Four years. OK. Yeah.

So they showed me this video. Honestly, great work. Great work by you. I mean, I learned from the best. And Hallie is... I'm really good at sucking dick ass. Wait, don't. No. Why do I cut that? What is this episode? I keep that in. Anyway, so I watched this and...

It was a masterpiece. Like, it wasn't even, like, a weird video. It felt like we were all in this together kind of vibe. Like, Lauren was, like, moving to make sure she was getting the right angle. The boyfriend was having a good time. You were having a good time. Yeah. I think she had a ring light. But how the fuck do you – and isn't it, like, now, like, a yearly thing? Yeah. Because she doesn't like to suck dick? What is this? Well, like, it's, like, our inside joke. Like, she doesn't like to suck dick. And I was, like, oh, we're going to do it for you. And, like, we're all, like, really good friends. Like, oh, yeah.

She's so confident like she's too confident. She's so hot. She's like she's so hot. How many times have you done this? Like four score seven years ago. Multiple times. Like four times like three or four times. And how do these nights begin? They begin with the plant the seed being planted. It's like okay this might happen later but

But usually it's always on Memorial Day weekend on Nantucket. Like we go out, we go to crew, we have a couple of cocktails, the champagne's flowing and then someone's dick is being sucked. And if it's her boyfriend, do you leave the room after and she fucks him or what is happening? So it started was I want to watch them have sex. Like I always was curious how Lauren fucked. I've never seen it before. So I like want to watch. I've never seen it before. So like you often see your best friend have sex.

I mean, yeah. I mean, like, so picture this chair in the room and they're like fucking on the bed. And I was just kind of like sitting there with like my legs crossed like this. And I was like kind of like a weird creeper. You're literally like smiling. I'm like, cheers. I have like a notepad out. I'm like, all right, this is it. Okay. How did you feel? Were you at all turned on or were you just like fascinated? Yeah.

I was like turned on, but I was like, no, I don't think I would have a three-way with Lauren. Interesting, but you would suck her boyfriend's dick. Yeah. While she watches. That's like not that intimate. It's not that intimate. I would never like hook up with Lauren. Interesting. Like I've had many three-ways.

Lauren could never be in that situation. Why? I don't think she would want to be in that situation, first of all. And second of all, I think Lauren has too much respect for herself to be involved in whatever situation I want to be involved with. But she'll let you suck her boyfriend's dick. She honestly looks at it as like me. She's like, oh my God, he's a good dick. I'm sharing this with my best friend. Yeah.

Oh my fucking God. Dude, that's some confident ass bitch. No, it's the most confidence I've ever seen. Cause she's not even like worried that you guys are going to like ever do anything. Never back. Never, ever. It's insane. She's like, I want this for you. I want to share this goodness with you because you are my best friend. That's how she looks at it. And does she also say like, and also because you're so good at sucking dick.

Yeah, and also she's like, I don't want to sock. So you do it for me. And I have oral fixation. Like, I used to bite my nails until I got them done. Wait, really? I hit the vape. Like, Socking Dick calms me down. That's the promo. That's the title. Who needs therapy when you have dick? Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Liquid IV.

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make it happen so you've had multiple threesomes many what is the weirdest threesome you've ever had the weirdest threesome i ever had thank you for asking you're welcome it was during covid cut that you can't the way that you start stories like it was memorial day like the specificity no like this one girl was hooking up with this guy and i'd hooked up with three of his brothers like oh we cut that out

We're at a house already. And she's hooking up with this guy all day. And I had a guy at the time. And like I had FaceTime sex with this guy in the bathroom. So I was like popping my pussy in this bathroom. And then I like was done, whatever. I came out and this couple is still hooking up. And I was like, hmm, now that I'm here, now that I'm aroused and ready to fucking go, I'm ready to fire off.

They were like, why don't you join? And I was like, okay. It was like the couch, like the living area of this like small ass Boston apartment. Oh. And they were doing blow. Wait, can I say that? Yeah. So they were doing blow. And she was like,

Let's just, like, it'd be funny if we, like, both did blow off his dick. So, like, one of them would be sucking. One of them would be doing blow, suck, blow, suck, blow, suck, blow. The whole rotation. This girl ultimately, like, takes off all her clothes. And then she starts, like, riding this guy. And then I sat on his face. And then we swap, swap, swap. And there was, like, the human centipede situation. Reverse. Did you enjoy that moment? Like, did you actually have fun? Yeah, built character. What?

What is the biggest lie you've ever got caught in? I didn't give you chlamydia. I did. I did though. Okay. What is your favorite sex position?

You know, I would say on top. It's quickest and easiest. It gets them out of my apartment quickest. You get those new tits, it's going to be quick. You know, you're like pow, pow, pow, pow, pow. But I also like doggy, but guys do not like to have doggy with me because there's not much recoil going on. It's like a negative recoil. It's like putty. It's like Play-Doh.

What? Because the tits are in the front and there's nothing in the back? I thought I would get fake tits and distract from my lack of ass. It's like putty ass. Have you ever been in love? Absolutely not. What's your most controversial opinion, do you think? Anal is pleasant. What? If you're hooking up with someone ten times, how many times are you doing anal of those ten times? I mean, I've probably had more anal than **** here. No, stop. We can't. Wait, you're hitting the anal train? Yeah.

I mean, I'm a good Canada. I don't like food. So there's only in me. Can you see that? Have you ever gone back to front and gotten a kidney infection? Yeah. I think I have a UTI. I think I have UTI on my LV right now. Are you able to come from anal? Depends who you ask. Wait, what is?

I don't know. Who have I faked it for? Ten times of sex. How many times are you faking your orgasm? Usually not. I'm actually really good at finishing. Do you use a vibrator? It's like my superpower. No, I just use them as a dildo with a heartbeat. Usually it's me on top actually riding into the sunset. And then whatever you want to do with me after is... Are you often making eye contact during sex?

Yeah, it helps me. It does. Yeah. I couldn't tell if you'd be someone that's like, I'm not going to go deep emotionally. It depends how ugly they are, honestly. Okay, let's talk about your podcast. Okay. Extra Dirty. It comes out tomorrow. Yes. How do you feel about it? I'm excited. I just feel like...

I want to get some unhinged shit online again. We got to bring that back. So I'm excited to actually tell a good fucking story. Yeah, there's no censorship. I need no censorship. I'm excited for you to talk about your life because I feel like the fact that you have garnered such an audience already and people love your debriefs and like everything about your life, but you're right. Like,

It's so tiny, the amount that you're able to give because of how salacious your stories are on TikTok. You are giving like billions.

bite-sized information and people are loving it already and so I feel like the concept of you actually being able to sit down for like an hour at a time and give debriefs that are there is literally nothing that you can't say no one is telling you like Hallie that's too much Hallie that's not enough like you can say whatever the fuck you want it's kind of exciting I'm very excited it's gonna be really good it's also like a breath of fresh air I feel like a lot of people are so filtered just online in general yeah even if it's like not like a salacious story whether it's just like

Pointing out your flaws. I really want to get into that and just like have like a true life online experience. Have you ever felt like you overshared too much on the Internet? I overshare all the time. I mean, I've shared to you. Yeah. Like you're like, OK, do you ever regret it or no? With you or online? Both. No. It's just like what makes me me. I overshare and like I feel like that's a real life experience to be oversharing and

It sucks and you're going to deal with like the repercussions in the morning but then fuck you get through it and honestly it builds character. There is nothing I'm more excited for than your show. It's going to be so fun. Truly. Every Thursday Halle Batchelder coming to you live extra dirty. It's going to fucking happen. And by the time this is out Daddy Gang Halle show is coming out tomorrow on Thursday and we will be in New York City live.

partying and celebrating. I love you. Thank you for coming on and spilling your secrets. And now let's go to dinner. I love you so much. Love you. Net credit is here to say yes to a personal loan or line of credit. When other lenders say no apply in minutes and get a decision as soon as the same day, if approved applications are typically funded the next business day or sooner.

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