Christina Aguilera: Getting Dirty & Talking Sex (FBF)
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What is your daddy game? IT is your founding father, alex Cooper, with. Cristini aera, welcome to color daddy. Hi, i'm staring at your nails.

Oh yeah.

What's happening .

there is so fun. You know, there is open to interpretation, is that vina a could be of vagina, could be lips, but to in the same, both pleasure point and and then there's an actual mouth on you and tongue on the, I mean.

then this could be more appropriate for a call her daddy epo de casual crinolated like IT could be lips IT could be my pussy lips. The gas you all up from interpretation.

amazing. I need to .

gas you up for a second. okay? Because just in case anyone fucked and forgot, you are a seven time grammy, I award winning singer songwriter. You have sold more than seventy five million records worldwide. No big fucking in deal.

You're an international pop icon, voice of a generation, Fiona mother, chief brand advisor and cofounder of playground and this is your first ever podcast and you chose color dating and I am so fucking in on so honor. I can't believe when I heard you never done a podcast. I was like, sit down, baby girl.

lets go. I said because I ve seen you pop up on media didn't exist when I was coming up in this business and you know doing this once I was like six or seven basically so um but you feel safe and I always I appreciate that you know because i've been through the gambia, a lot of interviews and people that you know I grow at a time where IT was like appropriate to be inappropriate and ask you know crazy things. But I always feels never like the most intelligent way to go because when you make someone feel safe, they want to to open up more and you always do. And you're so pretty.

by the way, oh my god, right back that no, I really appreciate that because I agree. I think that's what I want to talk you a little bit about today is just like your journey has been so public and you've went in front of people for so many years that it's like I almost feel like people feel like they deserve a piece of you, like you're a piece of the public.

And I think it's important to sit down and like humanized people in those situations because it's like you're human beings, you have feelings, you've gone through shit. You also like the queen of reinvention. You have had so many fucking errors. It's like iconic, iconic, iconic. Aside from, like, the present moment, what is your most favorite era of your own?

I mean, it's got to be probably stripped and dirty and beautiful, and fighter can't hold us down. You know, IT was the time when I was turning, you know, twenty, twenty one. I'd already gotten my foot in the door. My first problem was successful but I was still very like play play by the rules and you know very given a you know set by you know label very label driven and um and so after that I you know was like, you know I have to do songs that means something to me and are valid to who I am and being fearless and talking about anything and that includes sexual I felt that there was like a lot of shame and fear around the subject and and especially you know as a woman were raised with a lot of stigma. There's a lot of you know it's so layer and it's tough to be a woman so I wanted to really a be be who I was and make IT a safe space for you know everyone to feel good and make IT a conversation .

that era of yours for women in general. But it's also so funny we can look back on IT, but I know there was push back during that era which will talk about so funny like now it's like, oh, go on crinoids also like crazy to then read the tabloids back then oh.

a hundred percent. Well, first.

how does that feel like the amount of people that still recreate your outfit, whether IT was red carpet music deals, like it's insaaf fucked in halloween, it's like Christina everywhere. How does that feel that that still so powerful in .

people's minds? It's incredible. I love you so much just because you know IT now is celebrated and IT feels good and even the people that you know got a done. But there was a lot of push back. There was a lot of you know um double standards with IT and there was a lot of know because I went on tour with you know just and we did the strip justified tour and there were things where I was just like, why is IT OK for him and not OK for me? You know I mean so it's just like I was constantly pushing back in and my way, I mean, I was so appropriate sometimes the things that were were asked about that era.

It's so crazy to me and I again, I agree with you like that comparison of like a man doing the same thing which get in two because it's like i'm doing the same thing and yeah i'm being called the slab and like he's like the boy next store.

Let's go back to the first time that you stepped on a stage. You were nine years old competing on the show star search, whose idea was IT for you to do a show like that?

I was at that time raised by my mother, my grandma, so strong women um and my grandma specifically um really was so proud and you know really a pushed IT to be like taken seriously is something to be professional because thinking always just came to me is like this this release I grew and a chaotic you know um upbringing as a very Young child and always kind of like feeling um like a protector and all that and always felt isolated sort of in my side in my situation and so singing I was a sound of music that first inspired medical and from then I just you know, I was like just a release on a form of expression for me before I even understood with that man. And then whenever my parents got divorce mooting with my grandma, my grandma was like this. This could be something .

in it's so crazy that you're like I just saw as like a release where I was using IT like a new mobile c we see was one of the most truly talented singers of period point blank like hit notes that no one can but you kind of mention your childhood. And again, I think something in media is like, we see this version of you that so put together and it's like a Christinia aguila SHE has money. He is fame. You mentioned that you kind of grow up in abusive household, but do you remember, like the first moment, realize like this is unsafe or something was wrong.

Fear you know you have to listen to your body and you know fear is is something that you know you can actually feel you know uh so right then and there you know something doesn't feel good and it's not right um and then you know having so much compassion for my mother and seeing you know when you see someone um being hurt, someone you love who yeah that you know I still you know at forty two, i'm still affected by this.

It's under the surface traun ever leaves you. You just figure out ways to try and heal IT and and to me it's their appetite c to speak about IT. And I saw my mom, you know, go through so much that I think that is still a level of purpose for me in the sense of I I always want to try and empower are other people and people in situations where they feel voiceless and unheard.

And I just have such a deep rooted need to try and, you know, use my voice. And I would later discover and and understand with that meant to me. But IT never leaves you and and your trigger when you see movie is when I when I you know I just immediately you go to that place ah you know and i've done a lot of healing and a lot of growth um and releasing you know a lot of anger comes with that.

A lot of shame comes with that. But you know IT IT takes a lot for a woman to leave those situations as well and my heart goes out because some of them don't leave them and you know and that could vary in a lot of ways you know, sometimes it's financial, sometimes it's fear of authorities not helping and then at getting worse. Or you know, sometimes there me, you know, sometimes IT feels like there's no way out. But you know, my mom locally, you know, she's we do do these drives from at the time, was the last draw from jersey to my grandma s and pittman g and we would just do these nightly, just me, her and my little sister, and we would just like to the night drive. But you know, all of that IT stays with you, but it's become a part of what's important to me .

as my message when you say you would do these drives was IT .

while your mom had yeah ah but but i'm like holy buck like was .

that when you were still your mom hadn't left your dad yet but you were like or had they laugh?

There some back in four. There's some back there. You know there there are some back in four.

There's always the tug of leg. I'm never gonna do IT again. You know there's there's sweet talking involved. There's a lot of shame also.

And like what didn't you just leave? IT is so much more complicated than that and it's a mental breakdown of self steam and you start to believe someone else is narrative and verbal abuse to you and self. A team is something that can break down so easily even to the most powerful women executive. Um he doesn't matter what you do this you know we can go on stage and have these larger than life persona but all IT takes us for you to believe someone's negative narrative about you once it's in there and it's working in its way and it's soul. Adam, with my daughter, i'm just like first time somebody ever hits you, the first time somebody makes you feel not right about yourself oh girl, i'm so protective, mom of there and as .

but as you should be because like you said, like you have that trauma and you that like you're like, I watch a fucking in movie and I can feel IT and I love what you said about the concept dov, when someone says, why don't you just leave when people say that it's such an ignorant statement that like pisses me off. I had a loved one that was an an abusive relationship and you're like, it's so much more fucking complex, but to leave, do you remember the moment that was like your mom, like were out?

Yes, officially, when the abuse started to really turn on to me. You know, we were living in japan for like three years, so we were super isolated, which is where I started singing. And looking back, that's where I started to come.

I would like singing out of this window. I have like a thing about like windows and like they just when you're feeling just, you know, trapped, I don't know there's something about the representation of a window and just like there's hope on the other side. So that's where I started singing the songs from like the sound of music.

And so and just that image are always remembers like a core memory of just like there's like something on the other side. There's a bigger world. There's A A bigger purpose.

I felt IT as as a at a really Young age, but yes, was like a matter of things. And like you're in a foreign country where my dad was in the army, so we're on an army base. I mean, in a situation like that too, abuse runs rapid. You know at the walls are paper thing, you know where we're living and um and uh you can hear abuse just happening on the other side of the wall. You can hear, I mean you know it's terrifying and is like all you want to do is hell but a lot of times even when you call the authorities, you don't get the help that you you need and in the doors shots and you're with your abuse er again so it's so important to try and research all you can speak to people that you can trust and really you know uh try and get yourself out of this situation yeah because you know worst case scenario you won't you know live to tell the story about IT was .

IT hard for your mother to, as a single mother, take care of you and your sister. Like then you started making money or you kind of providing for your family. Yes.

yes. Sweet, hard.

Yes, I still am.

But you know what in that? In this role, to IT comes with responsibility and responsibility that you know I know is is destined for me and I take on and I take IT on, you know well, when you're in those situations, you grow up really fast and you become like an immediate caretaker and protector of the person that's being hurt. And so yeah, this is just like, kind of like my .

role yeah yeah .

all my dogs are rescues like, you know, i've just that your mother, your mothers.

I think back and i'm like, twelve years old you join the Mickey mouse club, brittney, Justin and am thinking about, like how, while that time must have been for your life, what do you remember like learning at twelve about the industry at that time?

It's a work at that, you know, that teaches you work ethic. You give me a schedule, you know where where you are in a close like it's it's very disciplined and you either built for that or you're not. You know it's it's something that you realize very quickly if if you know you're cut out for that kind of lifestyle, it's hectic, it's chaotic. It's go, go, go, it's on the run and that only builds more you create. And I have to say, and my mom would always say this too, you know, SHE wasn't like your typical, like I would be around these kids who were just like really forced to do this, you know, and my heart would break for them and my mom would be like, what is wrong with her like, you know, because you see this mother that and the kid does even want to do IT, but I was just what I born to do.

So IT was something that we really knew and and um I pushed you know for the performances to happen again like but just in the most I think organic way to start just like because I loved IT yeah and for the first time I was around a bunch of other kids who really loved IT too like IT was just, you know born performer, right? And I was really cool to feel that energy because you know coming up in school in the town that I grew up, IT wasn't really like, you know it's a sports town, you know and that kind of thing was very celebrated but like arts and creativity and what not you have that in facebook but yeah, I just didn't have a lot of kids that truly um love doing that and those kids were just how talented everyone was. Ryan gosling like you know, Carry rusal. There was just so many people that I was just like a casting agent, how to get everyone together?

I do relate to like feeling a little bit like you're out of place where you grew up and IT only exacerbates the feeling of like wanting to get out and wanting to find like minded people. But it's so interesting also hearing you talk because it's like IT feels like you are almost made to have to grow up very quickly in in many ways. We're like your ambition immediately LED you to working at a Young age, your family situation, you had to grow up quickly. Is there anything that you wish that you could have done more as like a child and in your in your Younger life that you didn't really get to have a Normal childhood?

So a good question in really thinking .

about IT.

probably no. Like my life now sometimes I would, you know because I was was working a lot, but it's I I wanted to go, you know, I wanted to, you know, you know I wanted to, I wanted to work. You know i've always Operated on like fighter flight, you know in many different ways. And um the more successful you are, of course more is gonna come with that. That's very demanding and very scrutinising.

Do you think though there is the part of you that was really ambitious? yes. And then naturally, like we are who we are from, like our childhood and nature, verse nature, like when you say, like you are always running, wanting to go. Do you have you connected that at all to also like your childhood IT?

Could have been, I ve been really dissected that that part, but I always trump t really big, you know, I always mpt really big and and yeah IT IT could be looking for some sort of may be escape as I mean, I think have the people that are in this business where we need, you know, it's it's socks because we're the most sensitive people on the planet yet we're looking for like you, but we have this like you know, alter ego that we have to turn on to get the work done and to and you know follow a schedule. But also that makes us so vulnerable and in needing some kind of weird validation.

Totally, totally. Your breakout solo gene in a bottle, I was going to say top the charts that's like a fucking in under statement IT took over the world. What do you remember about the day that .

that song was released? I was still I knew I was live in. I was on my own pretty early too, trying to get a record deal um and so I was like, you know how's hopping from like odd places from my managers house in the time to another manage that goes very odd and weird and I would again mama bear like never with my daughter like I would be like protective and overseeing all that the whole other but in new york, guy was where I started hearing IT on the radio for the first time.

So the album wasn't completely done and out and I was just remember hearing that and I was just leg, oh my god, and it's at me back to like driving around the car. Peper are going to only hoping that I would like hear my own one day on the radio and just dreaming about IT again, big dreamer, such very like, you know, sky is the limit and we're going if I do this. So IT was the most amazing feeling in the world.

yeah. And I think, again, it's almost like dice acting like what everyone was watching in the world was like, gene the bottle, Christina aguero, like this hot, amazing, talented Young woman. Then you're saying, like, oh, i'm like living with managers.

I'm like, kind of in sketchy situations where the world probably wouldn't even been fucking for them. That Christinia igali a wasn't like, set up and all good. But what were you emotionally going through at that time?

Ah man, that's a lot of question. What was I emotionally going through at that time? I mean, looking back, I probably I didn't have much time to even think about anything. I was given the schedule. I was told what to do, you know, told what to do. My true opinion didn't really matter from everything you know, like I remember like, you know, being told what to wear, what the image was gonna be and, you know, not feeling super comfortable.

That's also the products of a kid being raised in the business too you know, growing up and like your constantly being told by adults and and mainly men, you know how and what to be and you're hearing on conversations two of what they their ideal, you know, women should be and look like. And so at a Young impressionable age, like I just remember, I was just so you take certain things on and then you have to like reprogram to think for yourself and and what makes sense for you. So um IT is a lot you know to take on so your dreams are coming true, but you're not quite getting to be the person that want to be and and telling the stories you want to tell.

It's like so how and .

through that for nothing .

no and but straight ed up, I will be really with you it's I really think it's so helpful to hear you talk about this because I remember myself sitting at home with my older sister watching these videos and to know that like this first era, not to take anything away from IT, but like that wasn't fully you like. That was like a lot of men in a room constructing like, let's have her hair look like this and let's like have aware this, which I get is part of the industry. But also then my like heart goes out for baby CarOlina because i'm like that age for a Young woman to already be dealing with like insecurities and figuring yourself out and then to have men be like, we need this, this, this you are like exposed to such a different level of criticism and someone being so fixated on your looks like, how did that affect yourself worth?

I mean, it's a lot I mean, you could only imagine it's difficult enough growing up and trying to figure that out away from the camera but being yes, you know in front of IT and you know scrutinized and picked apart and judge and and everybody, he's got a different opinion. That's the one thing I learned really early on, is like, wow, no matter what I do, like, somebody's gonna be and tired and somebody's not gonna happy with that. And I was like, and i'd always die IT and journals. And like, I always had this, I think, god, this core sense of myself and what I wanted, my purposes and my messages to do, and that and to help, and that's what I feel like, kept me writing that core line of, like, bringing me back to real purpose and and to be authentic with what I did.

Then you decided, fuck this, I am going to add my twist and add actually Christinia into the mix of who I am, what I want to be. And you came out with the dirty music video, which is so fucking iconic. I was watching IT this morning just being like, every time, every time.

I just get excited to watch IT. But at the time the press pinch you as this bad girl, they were slit shaming you. There were literally celebrities coming out being like, god damn like SHE like looks like a horse shooks like a slap, which is so fucking crazy. Because as I was watching IT, watching IT this morning, I was like, it's such a major celebration of the female body and sexuality. How do you remember breaking away from what everyone wanted you to do and making this happens less than how do those comments affect you once you release that?

Yeah so many things through my. Yeah like ten answers there that I can think of but yes um I was actually surprised because like I was so in my zone of just like expressing and creating this album um and and just truly trying to make every facet of IT speak of myself as as a woman and I didn't and I didn't anna fit a box of like i'm sweet and vulnerable and demure and i'm gonna you know do the program you know pop form md, but i'm not any particular one thing or one brand and that's I did not like about the business, is the fact that they immediately try to box you and label IT.

So that is easier for them to understand. But IT was hard, you know, being a kid and being like, oh my god, I just live on having fun. These were my college.

I know this was my moment, except everybody see IT, but I was, have you know, an artist at the end of the day, you know how this is how I express myself, you know? And I wasn't just coming with dirty, you know, then we came with beautiful, and then we came with fighter, which was a representation kind of of, you know, my past and and going against the grain of people that I felt really wronged me because that's another thing you you know, people steal from you, people that are so close to you. I remember being so devastated about people that I, that really disappointed me to my core oig.

Wow, like, I feel really alone. You know, like, IT was IT really like. And then you want to retreat, and then you want to get defense mechanisms up, and then you don't trust anyone like as if I didn't already have trust.

SHE is from I I say like layers on layers on layers. But but in any case, you know, is part of my journey is is what I was meant to go through. And honestly, I wouldn't have you any other way because had I on through all these things, I wouldn't sing the way I do.

I wouldn't create the way I do, wouldn't write the way I do. I was like a span. I just like, took IT all in. And when I was ready to just be like, no more, I don't care.

And I remember being quoted saying, you know, I don't care this next record, if I sell one record or one million, like all the the cool lady stuff is amazing, ungrateful. But at the end of the day, I have to leg, sit with myself and feel like i'm contributing a bigger thing to the world. Then just a pop song in its hard and word like it's deeper than that to me.

And that's what I always, and that's what I set out to do White trip. And I was able to do, I think, god, you know, after getting my foot in the door. But I was gonna then play by my own rules and represent the kind of woman that I wanted to be.

I'm just like sitting here a little not in shock, but I will say, like you truly never know what you're gonna get when someone walks in the door and I think picture in Christinia ega like grew up obsessing over you had posters like your so fucking Normal I don't know where I would be if like at this age I started working and at this age i'm living with creepy managers and then this age are stealing from you and like to see like you sitting here and having such like a grasp on what happened to but every statement you consider like but i'm grateful and like I have perspective and it's really cool to see how you ve kind of take an ownership of what you can don't give any of those bastards like any fucking out though I look back at articles and I feel like there were so many comments on your you like all the articles.

You, which ones take a step? I'll come here. No, were you happy being known as the tiny girl with the big voice? Like, how did you feel about your body as a Young woman that the world is commenting on your body?

He was crazy growing up. And then yeah hearing people talk about, I mean, everything everything is is no having opinions on everything, your looks, your your voice, your your style.

everything back then you also exit like confidence sexually, like on stage and and in your your music and for the world we were all like, oh my god, like I want to be like her like she's so sexy and beautiful and smart and talented. How did you feel about your sexuality back?

I wanted to always own IT. You know, IT was important to me. I didn't. I think also, you know, the older I got in the more and by that time, you know, for most people that would maybe be in your like thirties to have that inside of leg. I'm going to do things my way, you know.

I mean, i'd grown up with so many opinions that I was just like i'm not going to play by your rules. I'm not going to see myself as you see me um i'm going to own my sexuality for myself. Sexuality is a beautiful thing, and we need to take care of IT as women. We need to really make sure that we prioritize IT and ourselves and what that means to us, because every woman is different.

And I never wanted to also insert the fact that I was so comfortable my sexuality and like, yeah like we're going to do we're going to you mean, like all this stuff, I never wanted to also, you know, even though I did anyway make some women like, you know uncomfortable what I was doing. But I never wanted to make IT like you have to be this way too, like everyone has their different comfort zone with. And just because I want to express myself this way, like let again, let people live away, like then everybody owit the way and they need to own IT let's talk about IT know.

And back then, you know, that was cool about what you do. What you do is, is we're able to have these open conversations now. Now I see women more than ever talking to each other, and it's like OK and so accessible with our phones and like social media. That's the positive of IT. And and and everything is, is that we get to like have more accessibility total totally envy like this happening.

like a really girl like total.

But I didn't have that back then. So yes, I was very hard and very terrifying. And I took so much personal, I really did. And then you have people in this situation, this is why you're my first post because you have, you know, you're so used to creating these legs, certain walls and defense mechanisms because you're just like people are beating you and then you're like, we I didn't I didn't like, you know how I do .

you so right because I feel like your era of coming up IT was like tra hard yes pop ali tabloid and like home shit people so fixated on every single move. What was dating like for you? Um what was your dating like like as you were like coming up in your career, like late teens?

I didn't really have time for that, but I did um I always went for things that I would feel safe about like you we'd have our you know you traveling and you'd meet certain people. But I was it's so funny that I gave this persona because I probably was like the last person to lose my verge and like, you know, I just I don't know, I was something that was for me. You know what I mean and that's, I guess, why my message is went the way they did too because I owit first maybe um but IT doesn't matter how IT goes down, as long as you find your way in your path with being comfortable with yourself. But we always get like off topic when did you lose?

You bring me back, tell us IT was later .

than you would think OK you know, given the girl that was doing dirty and all you but yeah, it's it's more of a funny thing looking back or it's just like people thought probably like .

you were pop and off.

But yeah, I was I had you know I had certain dancers that were like close quoter because you have like you know you're traveling a lot and there's you have accessibility to only so many things. So you know IT is what IT is and then you know like I am yeah I lot of things that i'm just like me, I should have realized he wasn't looking at me, wasn't interested in me. You know, like he. A lot of things know that like sad, but I feel bad for like my Younger self.

I love you. Little P, R, train, you're like, and maybe a dancer that was more than, and I shouldn't see good. So okay, so you like, you had an interesting experience despising such an icon. I was looking like you don't have too crazy of like a celebrity r attached your name. And my question is, miss angular a, was that actually because that was intentional or read is really good at keeping things hidden and a little seeker that we didn't know about?

Yeah, I definitely, i've had my experiences, but I also, like, I mean, my life is hectic enough. And like, this is a very narcisse c industry. And like my anxious, could IT maybe take somebody that did the exciting thing I did, ran around and travel is like, I know how this goes.

Like, i'm too. Like i'm too, too vulnerable for that, too sensitive to like, be so paranoid so like, you know, this business is very demanding. It's a lot. And yeah, I just, you know, i've definitely like not been into the celebrity thing.

right? No, that's really refreshing to hear because it's like you see some people like trying to its obvious on the internet like oh, this couple appearing and it's like to stay relevant. And I can imagine how obnoxious like that word is like being in the industry for so long. It's like how does the streets of like managers and people being like we need to say relevant, we need to do this. Like how does that effect deal?

It's just annoying more than anything else. I don't want to be corning and be like it's but IT really is to me about intentions, you know. And if IT if IT doesn't feel right to me, like I just can't do IT, I have really hard time forcing myself. That wasn't interesting to me.

It's so interesting too because .

I feel like .

guys next door interesting because, you know, what is so fast is like, did anyone ever try to be like, hey, like, look at these people doing couples like this will make you even crazier.

Yeah i've you know i've had I just if it's not real to me, an authentic I can't do IT you know I can afford something as personal as that.

I know you mention interest issues. Is there any because I don't think a lot of us can fab them. The amount of cameras and pop ali back then, like is there any paranoia that has linger in you?

Oh yeah, hundred percent. I mean, I went through a bad period at a certain time where even like the clicking of the camera papara, I like, like, just was so like upsetting to me. I'd like up a panic attack. And I I know i've heard other celebrities has actually say this too and then you have really horrible stories that happen whenever you again starting to believe in narrative, you know and then um yeah it's a very weird thing that kind of attention and that that kind of that world so yeah that that is a part of two why it's just like, you know it's very anxiety writing for me. You know let's talk .

a little bit relationships and then we're going to talk about sex with relationships. I'm curious because I am currently in therapy and I I think it's so interesting of like we're all trying to undo shit that our parents fucked us up with. It's just the fact I don't care if you are perfect parents then you're so fucked up. So it's like are there any patterns in relationships, previous relationships, that you now kind of recognize that you had to stop and and try to break moving forward? Like I like bad patent.

Yeah no, it's still a process sometimes to really um you to check yourself too. I think there's accountability and you know things that even though you they're not you're fault, you're still condition and programmed in a way of fear and paranoia a and and also sometimes not given a good guideline can really mess you up.

You know, because then it's like, is this Normal or is this just like or or is this something I need to leave the relationship for like i'm so like into being? Like, okay, wait, do I need to be taking this ship right now? Or can I walk? I walk the fuck g away.

Like, you know, I mean, like, what's Normal? What like? So it's a constant. I believe in therapy too, the right kind of therapy. I know that you mentioned .

you have like a collection of diaries that you've cut for like, yes, twenty some years yes, what a diary entry that makes you kind of sad for your Young ourself when you read IT.

I think just yeah how how heard I was because I was so into this being like one day i'm going to i'm even picked and i'm going to know you know see myself on mtv like all those things like IT IT was such a dream and coming from such a good place to all of a sudden you're shook by all the shit that comes with the success and yeah, I think it's like it's sad when I when I see how how some like press and articles and some interviews that were just so taking out a context or just mean like how hurt I was by that truly like affect IT and um and then yeah just makes you internalize negative thoughts about yourself and feelings if you .

can share what was something specific.

You know back then there was a lot of like you know IT was IT was a different business where there was a lot of you know, female comparisons and double standards with women and was a constant like pitting again each other and like, I just felt like just punches in the face and IT was just, you know, yeah, it's fucking hard IT IT was hard to just constantly feel like, you know, you're making music in doing something you love and then, you know, someone spinning something so negative about IT and IT was just IT was really hard because sometimes who you were pitted red again, you actually genuinely loved and and respected so IT was just like, you know but again, then you have people like beating you and and do you know what she's said about you? Well, no, I mean and then you're like, wait, what get out so IT is just like and you're too much of a kid to understand like what's happening. I hated that shit, you know like that's why I I like now i'm just so excited to see you know more you know exposed women supporting women because now you're cutting through the middle man a lot more, which is really.

really nice. Yeah I think IT IT clearly worked for the tabloids to have characters and ideas. If we put this person against this person, this is going to be, this is going to sell through because these are two huge names or three huge names or this cut like, yeah, it's so insane and but then it's like, i'm an individual, why can I just be cocina egil's a this incredible singer and leave IT at that and then let everyone also have their own careers because there are so many other people driving and that must have been buried.

I never there was yeah a headline that was like, comparing me with artist was like, it's like rover's. Wait e you know, I was like, oh my god, you're so dramatic.

Like you like that theory .

to even really understand with that man so I was like, you you could just understand the level of, like, how Young I was being thrust into this world. That was like, what what you saying? What are you .

saying to cats to compare people to rovin wade? Like, let's turn .

IT down. A noch t yeah. IT was too much. IT was too much.

Okay, I love to ask people this because IT does give insight. What is your biggest .

security? Is my biggest insecurity. Oh, my god, I I really wasn't prepare for that question.

I don't know, I could think of, I mean, every I don't know every day is something different. It's a part of you. Like what is my biggest security? Biggest insecurity.

Um I think we all have this where we just don't feel good enough. I don't know in every in every sense you know I think we can all pick different parts of ourselves and pick our ourselves apart for forever. But I really it's something if to train yourself against when .

you say you're not good enough. Take a set. She's coming back. no. But when you say you're not good enough.

everything like you know I mean, I think this business Operates like a business, you know and it's a whole self worth thing. And then image I i've been to the gambit, you know people growing up in his business are going to see as a teenager kid are going to see as a Young woman coming into your body and expressing yourself they're onna see you as a ground woman. They are going to see you be pregnant.

They're going to see you um um go through the camp of of different places in stages of your life where your different kind of weights and you know we all go through these things as as women in general. But yes, it's so hard to just be inundated with different opinions and and everybody has different standards for what what they want. But again, women like embracing this now more than ever. So yeah.

not being good enough, I think, is the perfect dancer that makes sense of just a culmination of the whole interview is like you wanting to be yourself and being in an industry where it's like picking apart every fucking thing you do, whether it's the people you're working with or the media. And it's like it's never good enough. It's never good enough.

It's almost like it's never right because everyone has a definition of what good enough meanings and then the same people are that are reading good enough, don't feel good about themselves and some like where's it's all like stemming. So it's signature and you have to really isolate your perspective because even whenever you know someone's comparing you to someone else, you're like a wait should I be compared like you start just second guessing yourself? And so yeah, it's tough out there.

It's tough out there. And how we get through that is by having sex that transition. I'm like, no.

let's talk about sex. yeah.

What is your favourite part about sex?

Getting off? I mean, like, but it's not that cut and drive my favorite part. I love intimacy.

So IT depends. Every person is different and is what I love about sexuality. I love getting into IT and finding out how everyone Operates.

You know, how much of a freak you, how much of a, you know, submissive are you? Like, what is your, what is your playground? How much of a freer you, cristina, and how much gure you?

I I would say I actually is a question because I will enter that I will say, I remember my sex in college. I had lost my Virginian high school and I was like, I don't even know what I was, was to just feel from that. Like what the fuck just happened? Like that was a feel good.

yeah. And then when I got to college, I felt like, oh, I like having good sex. No, I fucking was in.

No, I think was in. I thought because I was comparing IT to high school sex, which was like, literally sand paper. And I was like, awful. So I like then I think as I started to explore my sexuality more like junior, senior year of college, I started to be more confident. I'm kind of being like, fuck the guy.

Like i'm going to get myself off and that's when I got a vibrate and I started use loop and it's like when you can get yourself first and you're like, all that is what I want to feel every time fucking a guy, a girl that whoever IT is. So I would say as i've explored more in the bedroom, i've just naturally become more of a freak because i'm like, I want to feel this. I want to feel this with my partner.

I wanted to like explore new things together, if that makes sense, that it's been like a gradual progression. But I was like, I wasn't like fucking like great in college. And I thought I was like a freak .

but nobody you know nobody is nobody knows what they're doing at first. That's why it's IT should feel like exploration and it's okay. But you're so insecure at that age and you you see these movies and all that. You just want to have that all figured out right off the bed or or you two you know Young to speak up for yourself and you know IT kills me too whenever you're grown and you fail too insecure to speak for yourself when you're not in a relationship that feels safe enough you to have these conversations we're even to compare notes with other women you know because it's so shameful but um but sex is fun and knowing your body is so important you know and you're only gonna your body when you spend time with yourself first so that have you even know so that you even know what to ask yeah from your partner or what you like.

Do you incorporate toys into the bedroom .

I do I mean like, you know, as you mentioned, the vibrator was a game changer whenever I was a geno first expLoring myself and know for sex store ever went into and you know, I was just like, oh my god, I literally remember even having like this little like pocket size one I could like packing my bag on an airplane like I was honey. Like, you know, I mean.

like you getting off on an airplane.

I know she's been excited just talking about IT, but that's how we should. Of course you kids me, like sometimes, sometimes it's an anxiety thing too. Like a lot of girls, like when I D like I would feel IT very early on, like when I was like in school, like even as a girl, like I felt nervous about something I would be like, oh .

going, oh, when did you start master beating? When was the first time you master ating?

Oh my god. When well, I think we all kind of like star as little girls, like when you rob up against things and I feelgood and you know like you know, I think that's also whenever it's like you have to be like it's okay like that for you know have your private time. You're not doing something like company.

You have to learn these things. And sometimes they don't have good teachers and that make us feel safe. So that came early on.

Yeah so know some people, I think, have more sensitive areas. And I just i've always been engaged. I've understanding this things happening down there.

Costa is master beating on plane. She's getting off. She's having the best time of her life. What is your best skill in the bedroom?

Oh, wow. Oh my god. yeah.

Like, where do I begin?

I mean, hands down. It's, I mean, it's got to be blow jobs. I mean i'm I love a blow job, you know I mean I and you know I know I enjoy IT like I had a lot of um also like male friends who I was always like and what did you do you hear like I was literally a group around so it's like I know every different part in the sensitive areas and I I like I literally I do enjoy I hear some women don't like IT, but I don't know, man, it's a turn out. You know IT is because .

and I love that you're saying that too because I we're like we can enjoy ourselves. Get off. There's nothing Better than if a guy actually knows how to you well, but there's something so hard about pleasure in your partner because that gets me off.

I don't want like him to not be enjoying IT because I know i'm going to be enjoying myself. Do you have any little tips there? Any you like? I know the areas like what .

areas and sexuality is a very you specific thing. So like one guy might like another one doesn't you know like there are some guys. I don't like their balls being touched, tampered with.

There is some guys that like brutal things happening to them. And you know yeah there's a lot of different levels, you know that's why it's important to like me with a partner where you can really just explore. And there's still a lot more things that I have not explorer that are on my to do this.

And you know I think you know it's hard and you also have kid, you sometimes it's been like, oh, OK and you're here. Okay, amazing. So it's it's a lot of things and with something you have to make time for.

But yeah I I love that and I also like I mean, I think there's there's something to be said after you put in the hard work. I think swallowing is really you know a good thing and it's got a lot of protein. I have to say.

I'm promoter of the swallow, okay? I like I didn't put in that hard work for nothing. You know we went in there, I got tuggs and pulled and there's things happening, you know maybe gg, I don't know. But you know, I mean, hey, whatever your pleasure points are but should be you feel good and safe with your partner, whatever your your .

bag is but I fucking love you. I love you so much. That was fucking amazing. Okay, top three sex .

positions of .

I think .

um oh you're fine. I don't think you know like you're actually safe to talk .

to is not creepy yeah like A A male journey like Christina top three you're like, yes, I don't have .

sex anymore, just safe about IT IT depends on the mood. Uh, definitely. I mean, I I love a lot of position sometimes it's nice is like early in the morning, like from your side behind and it's like there's like holding involved and like, you know spooning involved.

I like I love to cuttle. I love to feel like safe and protected, but then it's like I get too hot and i'm like like me alone. I just want to to feel of a second. I'm good .

but the morning from the side is also so nice because it's like we're half .

doing IT or not but it's like the chairs my becoming .

isn't happy through. You're like doing even the side and then you like kind of flip on your stomach and then it's from the the .

whole thing is so good. Don't where it's gna go this limit but there's that yeah like some good like dobies sometimes like in the shower there's you know i've been you know there's been some good time. You know like there's like the studio sound board you know been bent over there .

a couple of times.

Plan can be fun. We've definitely had some things under the blankets when the seats are big enough to like know we've been at you know I I can't believe we didn't get hard like so many times and so many situations like .

I I have always thought about that, but I feel like i'm too much of like a place that was a ck. I don't are you just about a private playing though?

No, i'm not actually on international flights. Turn the light off like the chairs are like I don't know where you're sitting, but you know there's always like you room for like be get creative, you know blanket it's like it's like the position we just talked about the little spoon. It's like a safe with my partner here, like we're just sleeping together.

The flight attendants like mam.

yeah, yeah, no, got a way to everyones. I'd going to sleep, you know I mean, so yeah, you got know, setting the mood.

Everyone is like, note to self, try to find crazy to argue or on a flight at some point in life and sit next to her, oh god, that's like kind .

of these instructions.

I love how open you are just about all this. Because, again, I think something i've tried to do in my show, and I love that you are doing, is talking about this IT should not be shameful. We should not be in barrs like we're celebrating the fact that we've been repressed for so many fucking years, even enjoy ourselves to even knowledge like the lower half of our body and what's going on down there.

And I think it's important for women like us to sit here and casually talk about something because I know how many women are at home being like if Christina arga can talk and she's currently coming up in like this, is this like, yeah, I just is it's an exciting new era, I feel like, for women. And it's like we get to own our shit and be like, fuck you if you want to cause a slot or or whatever. We don't care because we're not we're just enjoying ourselves in doing what we should be doing, which is celebrating our bodies and doing the same thing that men have done forever.

It's true. It's really, really true. I think because of generations of like not knowing how to talk about IT have been shamed for IT um IT being like you know something that's very you know IT from a male's point of view and objectify that we don't know where we stand with IT.

But now more than never, I feel like this generation is like having none of IT. And we want to talk about that. We want to engage. We wanted be educated about IT.

We want to know what's good for IT and and we should now the time for that and and making sure you know that's why it's like music and lyric know I had a song called sex for breakfast on, you know, one of my albums. We've we've never been shy about things, but this is literally, you know, just the next progression for me. And in passing something down in my daughter that he can enjoy and and understand like this is nothing to be ashamed of. This is healthy, natural, put good things on, you know, vita vitamin vami.

Okay, talk to me about playground a little bit because why did you decide to be a part of that?

But I think the authenticity behind what that means to me, being always a in the forefront, either defending you know, or celebrating or opening conversations and doors for women to be able to feel safe enough to talk about their sexuality and what that means for them because again, everybody is so different and there's no shame in the game.

I just want to a really just um now at this point in my life, being a mother who has a daughter who's developing her own relationship with her body and asking me, you know, when he sees you know that time of the month for me, like what's what's the tap on what does that do you know how I going to approach these conversations and in making her make sure that SHE uh feels she's taking care of herself so that he can also engage with a future healthy relationship. That sex positive ah sex is very important. I love the product.

Playground is all safe. It's all natural. And I just you know you know filgee you know we've explored with this um you know safe for you and and it's so pretty if fits and like the problem I love IT put on your nights and I think your bedside best friend is what I like to call her and and this is a product that's literally good for you and good for your vagina. And like why rents? We pay more attention to that for ourselves.

And I love that you're saying like why I can't we just walk into stores and be like, I mean, to buy this for my vagina, i'm going to buy this for my ARM pitts like I should feel like a whole wellness check that I I don't think also women feel like loob specifically has had such a negative connotation because, oh, you're so dry and then a man is like, oh, you not turned on and it's like, no, you IoT that has actually nothing to do with nothing like what a concept IT is, nothing to do with you yeah, yeah, yeah.

So I feel like there's still this shame around like pulling out loop. And all I can ever say is like if you are using loob, you're not having the best sex. You could be having point in play sexes ten times Better with loop.

that's a five percent. And it's like we wouldn't think of like doing things to our face like we moisture there, there's women, we do ten step beauty routines and things we wouldn't think of like going through a drug store and not hitting that section, not doing something more sizing for our hair. Like this is the epic of power like we need to be nurturing and taking care of and celebrating this very important part.

IT literally, yeah, it's the star of the show. So we literally need to be giving, you know, nurture, tender, loving care to IT. And also, IT should be explored. And what Better to help do this? And then, you know, sometimes it's .

a little get along the last question in ready, in a twenty eighteen billboard interview, you told the journalist to write great things about you. Do you have any great things about yourself that you want to share with the world that you feel like maybe people don't know about you are misunderstand about you that you like, you know listen to this.

Yeah I grew up at a time again where there was like a lot of negativity that was you know just always trying to be um you know poked you know and i'm i'm also you know you know I I have no time for like negativity and it's like I have been in the business long enough to know like you know I just want none of IT anymore to be a part of like the headline and it's like something that you know as a grown woman you can have more control over.

You know I don't like getting popped under the table because lus come out. You know we're an elevated time our in all of our lives or we are more open and talking to each other and and just I want peaceful energy, peaceful vides. Like I don't need to be talking about things that happened you know, decades ago like let's grow up, let's embraced like now more than never is the time for that.

And so I think, yeah, just, you know, don't poke the bear anymore. Like, don't poke, don't poke, don't poke me under the table because i'm still not gonna. You know, i'm still not going to be i'm not going to be bated anymore. You know, like a long time, you know, IT happened for a long time too.

This happened even, you know, after I had my babies is like a lot of people because there you know they need some attention to that i'll get poked under the table and be like it's one of those past what do you call these people that are just past progressive point the table when no once looking to be like I don't know why he said I don't know crazy like like you don't point me too let's not get a twister though i'm stands tive and all that but i'm a tough cookies at the end of the day, I truly don't give a fuck you know what I mean like, I just really don't and you know this is why, like, I just don't have time for the petty bullshit or you know just know sometimes you know the celebrity stuff is like, I just, I want to live a real life and and a loving life. You know, right, just I want good things around my energy. Space is so important to preserve that and and for my children, you know, no.

I appreciate you explaining that this is also like I get what you're saying. It's like i'm trying to be over here living my life. Yes, stop trying to have me come back into the bullshit t that .

I first decade .

decade ground .

we truly examples.

Christina, I honestly cannot thank you enough for coming on. I know you don't do this often and like you getting to know you truly, I respected you before. But like. Naturally, when you get to know someone, the respect just grows, and you're such a strong, inspirational human being.

and I just so happy to love you.