Protect the Boobies [VIDEO]
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Sunday morning fact, this cow, and do, do, do to do, do, do, do .

every sunday day.

Pretty good, right? Hello, daddy gay, welcome back to another episode of cold daddy. I am sitting here with my lovely, lovely, lovely best friend laron large in town. We were hanging out tonight and I was kind of in like a shady mood. I guess you could say .

you are good sport about things.

Yes, I would. Thank you. I definitely trying to just stay positive, but i've been dealing with some hell things lately that has just been bar frustrating.

When I got back from my honeymoon, I started just having like this, like intense pain in the area that I guess would you would think is like it's your I was like it's my pElvis and then I my OK that's my overall I scheduled in appointment with my gynecologist and i'm someone that has like always done like my yearly checkup bs. But i'm also someone that like I haven't had the best experience with gynecologist. I feel like i've had geneology st that are quite.

Just like not loving about the way that they deliver information like I remember when I got bad news like a couple of years ago and I was just like, yeah so that's IT and oh my god, like this is terrifying like, so what do I have to do? And like, what procedure do I have to get? I got like a really just like scary procedure that I was like nervous, like is is going to affect time, have children.

And so I feel like i've just had, like i'm just scared now I think I have this like scared taste in my mouth that's not a taste but you know, I mean, and so anyways, I ve just been really nervous study getting up. Like what is going on? Do I have an ovarian insists? Like what is this happening? I think anytime any woman has anything, when IT relates to down under anyone that has a uti st like it's just frustrating, obviously, because we can't see like a dick like we're like what isn't out there, what is going on. And so i've been doing tests and I just went for many different tests today, and I had to get all this blood work, and I was doing all these things and i'm getting A C can. And so I came home and laurin was like, you know, I feel you on a whole different level because you have had your own medical journey that you have been going on for the past, what like two later .

over two years.

And so today, not to make this like a depressing episode promise. It's not meant to be that. But I do know how many women listen to the podcast study ging and law and I I feel sometimes it's nice to hear from like Normal people not like have on a doctor specialist which I can do after learn drops of this information of what's been going on in her life but I just want um yeah I think you were like let's talk about IT and let's inform women of like what is going on and so yeah later take IT away was been going on with you.

Yeah, later take IT away was been going on with you.

I think we started talking about this because we were talking about like how important IT is to get a good guy now because when I move in chicago like three years ago, but like I maybe a year after, took me like a fucking in ear and like that in to, like who do I want? Like my good doctors to be in stuff. And that's makes a huge difference, totally. So I got a new guy now, and I went for like a yearly and he was like, have you ever gotten your hormones test IT and I was like, no and he was like, I think that would be like a good thing to do just to kind of like sea baseline where you're ad like I wanted to go earth controlled I wasn't honor at the time and she's like, let's test your hormones like, let's see where your levels are at so and we can like, make an informed decision of what what type of birth control is best for you and I like, wow. No one s offered to do that for, like, I love that I was about to say.

just like stopping you right there, which is why I think this stuff is so scary and confusing, is like I have never had a doctor ask me to do that, like I have never. And I ve had so many weird hormonal issues in the past with like different birth controls. I've never done a hormonal test.

And i'm like, we should we all be doing that? Like what fuck like? I've never heard of that. Yes.

me included IT and like my yearly and he was like, asking my family history and he was like, you have a family history of breast cancer and I was like, yeah, my bomb had breast cancer. My grandmother on my dad side had breast cancer. My aunt on my dad side had breast cancer and he was like, well, have you ever considered genetic testing? And I was like like I someone brought IT up like in passing like years ago.

But like because insurance cover that, like is it's super expensive. Like what is that process even? Like ah what was the process even? Like what did I do for that? I thought to say, yeah, what was the process really simple?

I was either blood work. P, because that was, that was just a big blood work. And pee visit. And all these cups will take all this blood. And like, test all these baseline thing.

And how did you tester your hormones, blood.

god OK. And so knowing, like my grandmother and my mom and my aunt had brust cancer, like I always knew there was a chance said that I could have a gene or something. But like my mom got tested and my mom didn't have the broker gene, which is a gene which is like the main genetic breast cancer gene that you can pass down and if you have the broken gene or the broke commutation um you have much higher risk eating breast cancer and average cancer and already knew my mom didn't have that.

So I was like, I think i'm fine, but like i'll do the genetic testing anyways and so I do all the testing and I go back the doctor's office probably like a few weeks later and it's like a nine m doctor's appointment I scheduled before work because i'm like, this is going to be in and out there is going to read me like, you're fine. Your blood levels fine and i'll go home log into work and I have like a full workday and I get to the doctor's office and like I can tell the doctors being like, a little like, too nice. She's being too nice.

SHE asked, like, if I want some water SHE asked if I want to like, sit and like the relaxation chair that gives you like a little back. Masa and I like, I found a nice doctor's office. This is like eighty class service go.

I know he was like trying to call me down, I think before, like dumping a load on me. And I agree so much with you. Like the doctor and like the dino that you have a doctors in general makes like a huge difference when you have someone who's like empathetic and not a robot, when they're gona read you like heavy results.

And SHE called into her office and he was like, I know this is about to be a lot and about to give you a lot of information. Like, are you in a place right now, if where you can receive that, this information? And I was like that maybe five or more, but I was like, god is, so consider IT like worse.

instead of just like being like, hey. So we looked to your test result and this is this, yeah, i've had doctors do that. You know, like we I didn't even I looked was just like texting my friend and I looked up in neuer space yeah like, I feel like I just got like, exactly.

And SHE was like, okay, like, let's start with the hormones and he was like, you have elevated testosterone, which makes me think that maybe you have pcs. And to get a pcs diagnosis, they typically look for two out of three things. One being elevated testosterone, which I had a second criteria, is having an a irregular period in my whole life.

I ve never had a regular period of an irregular my entire life. So mark checked box to, and he was like, from that alone. One like, I think you have A C S. And then SHE starts like listing all these symptoms and like I didn't have any of those systems.

Like the first one that like really skate means he was like I could cause not in fertility issues, where are you going to have issues with my eggs? But difficulty in being pregnant? And like that alone is just like a .

scary thing to hear.

And so like i'm already kind of like OK like, well, that's kind of big news. Like I think that everyone I thought that like everyone has like now I think people like kind of change. So where they talk about IT like not when I get pregnant.

if I can get pregnant yeah which is up the third .

one oh no the third one is um doing an alter sound of your coverage and seeing if you have assist on your others and they did that know like your always are covered in this so I had all three. And so that was like the first big piece of news that was like a lot.

Just like start like my mind started going up like, oh gosh, like what if I can't get pregnant? And like spiring like down that hole and then the second piece was like, okay, like, let's go original tic testing. And SHE was like, you don't have the Brown commutation, which is the more serious press cancer mutation. And typically they do recommend for that you get a double moc to me. And so I had a new remote that when my mom got tested like ten years ago, they weren't even looking for this one yet.

So that's why was like i'm safe, i'm in the cleaner like my members and have IT like i'm probably good so they could have this new one now I check for which is called checked, and I have the check to mutation, which means when you have like a set of genes, you have two copies of every gene. So i'm missing one of these copies of this gene. That's a protective factor that hopes me not to get breast cancer.

So it's not like I have cancer in my body. I missing like one of my protective things that hopes me not to get cancer. So SHE hands me as a big packet information, and I opened up the packet.

It's like a thirty page like books. It's from the genetic testing company. It's just like all of this, like all the test, they ran all the results like it's like very heavy, like scientific language.

And I opened the page and the big number like front and center is sixty eight percent. And i'm just like looking at this huge number on the first page, and it's just like bold and black, sixty eight percent. And it's like you have a sixty eight percent chance in your life, you'll get breast cancer.

I like. I wouldn't like thinking about like how I would have responded because I was so not not going into the process. I even was like letting myself like toy with the idea, but like not really, but like a little bit like if I have .

the gene like and like right like it's like IT doesn't feel feel like no, it's not actually to have .

and i've never had a panic attack in my life is like I lucky I don't like really deal things. I A lot because I just associate I no no, but not anymore. I have .

having a lot there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But like, when you like, if anything goes wrong.

you will something goes really wrong. I don't panic. I like freeze and like deos.

You go back back to what you know?

Yeah, exactly. I say I I was what feels .

written true .

to my soul exactly. So in that moment I that was the closest in my life. I ve, i've ever been like a panic attack.

So like in that moment, logic left my mind was like catastrophes like I was thinking of, like every worst possible thing I was like, I am going to get cancer. I'm going to die. I'm going to have to get chemotherapy.

I'm going to lose on my hair like you're mind goes to stuff like that cause i'm gonna to like, not work for months like, how am I going to support myself like my family? I'm going to be a burden to them like, oh, in the kicker, I had just started dating my boyfriend two days ago. We, I forgot that part two days ago because .

I remember you called me when you got home from the doctor. yeah. And I you really like, can you talk and like we have known each other our whole?

H, I remember exactly what you said. What do I say because you are in an interview? Yes, I remember .

exactly where I was and I, I, I was, like, late to the interview, right?

No, I texted your assistant and I was like, hey, I know alex is going to an interview. Do not say anything now when he gets out of the interview, like, and she's like, settled and everyone's out, everything is okay. Like, can you tell her to call me?

I fucking remember this. And I remember red Jordan was like, immediately after the person left the house, the studio Jordan comes up to me and he was like, hey, Laura needs you to call her and her face just looked like, so not well and I immediately knew something was off because I like, Lauren, needs meat IT and SHE reach out to you like, what is going on yeah and then I remember I walked to the backyard and I called .

you yeah and I was like, definitely. So at that point I had talked to my therapist, okay, because so i'm sitting in the office, i'm processing that. I had pcs. I don't fully know that means yeah, I know that there's a chance i'm going to have maybe difficult to getting pregnant. I now know I also have this breast cancer gene and she's kind of throwing a lot of information at me but like doing a job but like I know we are probably not going to retain any of this is going in one year of the other like let's set a meeting next week and like i'm gonna retell you all of this your doctor, my doctor yeah um and he was just like so amazing like I didn't feel like I was like being rushed out of there and like he was like I will sit with you like let's like ask me anything you need because I feel like .

that's like a major problem that i've experience with doctors. And from what I understand, a lot of people feel that way to is like I have so much respect for doctors, but they have to understand that we are literal idiots. When IT comes to what they're saying to us, we don't know like when you're talking about the broker gene, like I so like I don't know what that you don't mean, like you don't know what these things are until you have to know what you.

And so I feel like sometimes they deliver you information and then they just stare you as if you're supposed to be able to comprehend anything that they're saying yeah and then when you ask like we I don't really understand that. Like it's a lot of doctors have a really hard time breaking IT down so someone not only can understand IT in that moment, but can retain IT and leave feeling OK. Like I can tell you the amount of times i've left a doctors office and I don't know anyone else can relate to this study again, but like I feel almost dumb, so sometimes I avoid asking questions and then we'll get in the car and have a fucking breakdown. Like when I had to get that one procedure, I was for breaking the fuck out when I got the news, because I was like, I don't understand IT.

and I thought I was going to nothing there is nothing worse and like feeling like you're out of control a situation that's also like you can't comprehend exactly .

so I empathize with anyone like it's really terrifying and IT looks like mostly time you're going to the going to alone.

And you're getting this information and then it's so important, especially as we're getting older, more thinking of even having kids like it's terrifying. So I I empathize with you am so sorry that you had to like be doing that alone. okay? So your therapies talks you and the new comi.

So I walk out of the doctor's office with like my foundering my packet and I and like now that like I can't even like really like even call my uber a like, I just feel kind of like lost and like confused and like scared. And I texted my therapist and I was like, are you free right now? And that's like the one good thing about, like having an expensive therapies.

Like you can't have the ability to.

And i've never, ever, ever texted her like you talk right now. So I think he was like, yeah like call me like someone just actually cancelled. Like call me amazing, I know, and I didn't even call my uber. I lapped around the block, the city block. I think I lapped on the city block for forty five minutes like on the phone, like talking to her.

And my first thing I said was, i'm a near panic attack, but how do I handle the fact that i've been dating for someone for two days and like now, i'm like panicking that I think I might get cancer and one day, like, that's a really bad bus kill two days and into a relationship and like her, more contacts. Like we move kind of fast. Like we met and started talking in the dating within two months.

So like this wasn't like a long drawn out thing, were like we've gone through stuff before. We've had a difficult times. Like this is the first hardship or the first like not one thing that we've ever dealt with together two days into .

dating I know it's not even two months, two days yeah in two dating this person and you're like, oh, by the way.

my mind was like, I like that like a liabilities not to sign up to be with who was like a chance of getting cancer .

laurin I know my .

therapist was like, well, if that's the case then yeah and so her I was like, do I tell him or like, do I like, bear this on my own and he was like, this is an adult relationship. This is real life. You're getting tested early. Like, this is a test.

Like, how does he handle? How do you help and support you? And like, how does he respond such a good point couldn't even more amazing um so I like laughed around forty five months, like talking to my therapies, kind of venting and like just like letting all my thoughts kind of go which felt like nicer I kind of say like all the things that I was thinking and feeling and like where my mind was going and like something that we were talking about SHE was like, are you someone who feels like common, if you like go home and google or you someone who's going to like then like spiral more and at first I was like, no, like avoid.

Like I want to avoid. Like, I don't even want to think about this. I want to go home.

I want to shut this folder. I don't want to do anything. Like, I don't want to think about this and I think that was causing me moring. I idea actually because like this is now something I have to handle and something like I have to be proactive about and like do something right.

And again, like you just said, like if you oddly though, like if you do understand something Better than you will be common but yeah no, it's terrible to open the kind of worms of like, okay, i'm going to open google because you was also fact of about google is have the time if you putting your systems you have cancer yeah you like, oh my god but you're like, you know what? Like starting there can help you feel like more calm because you can get a Better grass on IT yeah .

so I spent like the first like probably like ten hours like trying to distract myself and no boy, no OK like let me open like my laptop. Like and like we were talking about how it's like really hard. You don't understand anything.

And like, luckily, like I have like an my undergrad grees like science, and like i've taken like college level genetics. So like I have like a basic understanding. So like I really emphasize with someone who I don't even know, like what a gene .

literally.

So like that was like, bit like I thought, like I had a little bit of like a one up there as a good hey, like I actually like kind of know what i'm reading and I felt so much Better once I like red and like started to get information a end. So I called a genetic councillor. And so like the company that did my genetics um testing was like, we have a councillor that you can call that can help break IT really down for you, explain to you what you should do and explain your options.

amazing.

Well, I guess first I talk to my boyfriend.

What did I say to you .

on the phone? You're like, I remember I think you were just I think you were just saying like, oh, my god, you were like, matt, matt, go find the best geneticist in L. A. Go to call up with all your friends at ceder si I, and go find the best editions. L, A.

I forgot about. I was like, we will get you the best doctors. Don't you are okay, Alice, come down.

Like, I need the first cover researcher. Like what's going on? Like, okay, but then call me. Yes, okay, you talk to your boyfriend .

and he was just like, amazing and I was just like.

and you're soul together .

to stay together this day. We just moved in together last week.

congrats. Thank you. Love that for you. Thank you.

So I talk to the genetic councillor and they were very comforting and they were like OK. Like, now you need to like be prevented that without this. Like you can't just like sit on this information.

Like you have to be proactive. Like this is amazing that you know this like feels so fortunate. This like most people like, don't have this information and they don't have the ability to like, be preventative. So now every six months I have to alternate between getting a mam gram and an alter sound on my boobs, like that one thing unlike today, I would get like a member gram and an alter sound. And in six months later, I would get and MRI on my breath.

And then six months later, and I would keep going back and forth every six months for the rest of my life, which is like, really like, daunting to hear that, like you have testing every six months for the rest of your life. And I think that even at that point, I didn't really SAT in because I they were like all like but it's so great that you have access to like because insurance will cover IT, and it's so great that you have access now till get that MRI because if you've get IT, an MRI and an MRI catches something and you're up to date with your testing, like you are most likely catching IT in stage zero. So I was like, okay, like that's amazing, amazing.

And then they like, but you do have a decision like you could get a preventive of mackey. And I think that my first thought with that was, well, i'm in a new relationship. I can't shot my boobs off like .

and I I think every woman can understand that like it's not like you're being banned.

No, yeah.

it's hard to stop your life in these moments that are what is like yeah like you said, like I was so daunting that you saw the number sixty eight percent like that made IT so real but at the same time, like you don't have cancer yet and so to think to chop your boobs off at twenty nine years old, like that's terrifying and you are right like you're in this relationship like you want to get married one day. You want to have kids like it's those things to think about before just being like.

yeah, repeal is IT in is a huge like I know part of it's like cool like i'll have like nice fake tits, but like it's a huge like surgery that you like have to like remove like all of like the ducks and all of the tissue and that you have the tools that come out and like it's like a big recovery. It's not just like the same as like getting like a boob job.

Um so I think then that was kind of something that was like old like that is a huge decision that like I need to make and I know that I want to do IT because having gone now for the past two years or so, like doing this testing every six months and they just like sucks, like the days leading up to IT, like fuck, I have to go do this. And then like lying on the table and like having them check and then sitting in the waiting room, like waiting for them, like with the results, like, okay, do I have cancer? Like, I they want to come out and tell me I have cancer and and they were like, I think most people burn out and then just stop testing.

Oh, wow. It's like they just have to keep going every six months of the rest of their life and playing them over and over. okay. Like do I have cancer? Like what's the .

results could be as much like that can be that's like so unhealthy.

yeah. So I think like that's the biggest reason I want to do is just like piece of mind and like knowing that i'm like putting myself like kind like I feel like like back in control of this yeah oh and like another difficult part was like figuring out how to like tell my mom because my mom had like really bad breast cancer when I was a freshman in high school.

He had was either like stage three or stage four breast cancer IT was like, really, really serious. And like for chemo, florida double mother to me. And like IT was scary for a while. Yeah and I know that he still lives with that fear of like having gone through that and like wondering if like, it's ever going to come back and like, and I like safe now and like them for me to like call her and tell her like, oh, now I have to deal with this like I knew that would be like really hard for her to handle and my therapy give me really good advice there that I think is like applicable for a lot of setting.

Um well one I called her physic first and I told her physic and I was like, can you help me find a time when like it's that can be the right time me to like drop this bomb on her? And can you like me home when I drop this back on her? Because if I can't be the person that SHE processes IT with, because i'm processing in at myself so I would like he needs to hang up and have someone like I would like you to be there to help her process IT.

And my therapy was like, tell her, like what you need from her so I like called her and I like, hey, i'm going to tell you something and I need you not to have a big reaction. I need you to be calm, because otherwise actually be really hard for me to bear if you need to process. Like, I need you to hang up and go do IT with your family, say.

and like, call me back and anyone.

how did you go like, perfect. Like SHE was like, yes, like, absolutely like, like, tell me what's going on and like, and was like, amazing. And like, I was like a bonding moment for us as he was like, I completely know where your minds going on, what you're thinking.

And oh my god, IT just makes me emotional because I can imagine as a mother like, you know, your mom, you can help be like, oh god, like, I feel guilty like, did i'd like and it's like, you know that I was so beautiful that you guys had this like moment where your mom was like, oh, I actually I got you yeah, I went through this and I we're going to get through this survive and you're going to be fine. But I also think just like for daddy gang, I think you're right. Like taking that moving forward is such good advice, even whatever you're going through to like half the time I feel like people have no idea how to handle a situation because the person coming to them, especially if you're emotional, most time people are like, I have no idea what this person wants me to say, yeah, am I supposed to freak out .

and I so but you validate .

you by being like a and that is a way like for your a partner or family member like to be able to tell people, especially if like sometimes men yeah, this is what I need for you yeah, okay. I think that helps you all. So that is such great advice, and thank you for sharing that.

So you told your mom, and when did, how long did you think about like deciding for .

the victim and everything?

yes. Oh, my god, my god. H my god. You don't have a penis. Okay, how long did you wait? Like, how long did you take like the two years you think for the master? My so I .

haven't gotten one.

Yeah, yeah, yeah that's good. Yeah just me when you decided, like I can do this anymore.

I think like after like a year and a half of like doing three separate like going to like get three separate test. So at first I was always like, I know I my mind in to like Angeles and joe like I remember like back in the day I was like, well, like SHE like IT was like a statement and I feel like IT was like before I was like thing like he did like a preventative like the said to me to like and my yeah with .

that so because I you're kind of right when I think of that.

I think of her me too so guy was like, I think that something like I want to do but like a i've never had a major surgery. So like that's just like daunting and scary but I have for the third time I was like, I don't want to do this for us in my life and like I don't know exactly when i'm going to a decided to have this surgery like probably within like the next like few years, but that's the around me when ago.

I mean, I thank you for sharing because I can only imagine how taxing IT is on your mental health like you said sitting there like, and how isolated like, as much as someone can set there and hold your hand. Like, your boyfriend can be there, I can be there. Like, it's your body. And I can imagine how terrifying IT is in those moments. But I please the love of got to come back like I don't have cancer. Um I think also something that you talked about that I think is important to highlight for anyone listening today is like I think that most people who may and maybe this is like, I know this is like a privilege, but I do know like obviously like even um plant parent hood's and stuff like women. I think it's like a terrifying thing for some reason for us to like go and just get checked.

Yeah and I think there's a lot there's a lot of reasons why some women wouldn't like whether you've been like whether was like sexual abuse and you don't want to open yourself up to someone like going into your body, whether like you're just not like you don't you didn't get the tools for education to like and know you should do this and like the amount of women that i've even seen sometimes been like i've never been to the dino is like, it's terrifying and anyone listening today, like I promise you, it's more terrifying if you find something out because you avoided the kind of than like go like you said. There is amazing doctors that will sit with you and hold your hand to the whole process. But like don't avoid going because it's like anything in life.

The more you push IT off, the worse something could be getting. And like you owe IT to yourself to take care of yourself. And like sure, doctors can be annoying with the way and like a little insensitive in moments. But not all doctors like that. And even if they are insensitive of they the way they deliver information, you can take that information and go find a new doctor. But at least you have the information and have autonomy over your own body in your decisions rather than like leaving IT up to fate and being like, I don't want to look I don't want to look like, please daddy gang, if you haven't like you should always be going to your year least you should always be going to a doctor and like checking and making sure you're good you should do breast exams on yourself like, I think for a while like I remember I went through a pear.

No, why even having like a mom who had like best cancer and a grandmother and on I was like, I don't only I didn't even know what .

to do my own self drive me either. I never did IT until the past like I think honestly, since this with you, yeah, I never would fucking do a breast exam I think and feels cording you like, I don't need to do that.

Like what what I looking for.

you'll know, but you should be doing that. So you kind of mentioned that the doctor was like, this is so incredible that you found this out early. And obviously I know you you are like the most like alarmist mullen.

You are so fucking brilliant and smart and I anytime i'm like, oh my god, if there was anything medical, I would obviously go to you and like tell everything that I know you're going to do that, everything on that. But like you said, that's not evidence experience. Like do you have any advice for anyone that may be is terrified and to even start this process and like is may be avoiding IT?

I think the way that like I like view IT is like this is something that like I have no matter what, and like, just like really framing and is like the fact that, like I know is so lucky and like a privilege. And like now i'm the one in control and like now i'm the one who is the ability to be preventative and like be on top of IT. And my ganeth logic was telling me like and I totti get how like this would be some people's reactions that like some people that get this testing and they see that number, whether it's a checked or the broker, and there's so paralyzed that they're just like I can do anything about IT and like I think just my voice to that would be like i'm not like its sucks and i'm so sorry but like and IT sounds so fucking corning but just like knowledge's power yeah and like you have like the tools now to like save yourself .

and save your life and live I think that your right lan it's like, yeah it's like opening that came of warmth is so terrifying but like you said, like now you have a Better understanding and like when we first spoke, of course you were like all over the place as any human would be like, what do I do and what I know? What's going to happen and now even I mean that I think that's also like a part of why we waited even talk about this. I knew this was something you were so passion about what you like. We need to tell the women that listen to the show.

like about mam grams. Do your brush exams if you have family history, like do genetic testing .

even if you don't maybe like just go to the dinner, let to start the process .

and make sure get .

get your pops yeah and I appreciate you sharing the story. As I know it's very personal, but unfortunately it's very common. And I feel like maybe not enough people that aren't like doctor is talk about IT enough, which I understand because most people would be like, I don't I can't speak about IT in a way that would like help people not break them out. But I really appreciate you because I think by you waiting to come and talk about this for like what now two years, I think IT has allowed you to like I feel like more .

information yeah and then I have like more tools of like what to do and how to view IT and how to handle .

IT yeah and it's like you are testament. Like you just said, you paste e around the hospital for forty five minutes like just talking to your therapies, saying a million different things like worried like all my god is the guy i'm dating going be like leaving me and now you're sitting here today like speaking to all these women being like, no, i'm now making an informed decision about my body.

I don't know what i'm gna do IT, but I do not going to do IT because i've done my testing. I've been doing in every six months. You have a plan, and that is all you can fucking do.

So thank you for sharing this study. Again, we didn't mean to get depressing this week, but I do think it's like being a woman is a lot having a uterus. And I think that there is so much like even just you having pcs like that is a whole thing because like you, what you try to go on birth control.

I try to on birth control and my body did not like that. I gained twenty pounds within four months. And oh, that was like, that was like a big but zone because like I like didn't even like realized like what was happening.

That was like winter and that I was working from home. So like, I was kind of only wearing sweats. And like, I would maybe only put jeans on like once a week on the weekend's like go to dinner.

And I was like, slowly, like my genes are getting tighter. And then I was like, okay, like, maybe I just like, I like, i'm always bloated. And then I got to the point where, like, none of my clothes fit me, and I was up two entire gene sizes.

And like, I had to buy an entire new wardrobe and that was really hard to feel like my body wasn't my own body. yeah. And since i've got him off the pill and gotten in I U D, and like that's been much Better for me.

But like that was an experience of itself of like just feeling like my body was just like out of violence and out of wack and not my own, and like having, like self stea misuse. And just like when you don't feel good about yourself, like I affects so many other things, I was like, I don't want to go do that. I don't want to have sex. I don't want to like, go to to a place where I have to wear real clothes. And like I know everyone, like I know the classics mares, like I know, like I probably saw like a Normal body type for people, but like.

I just was not mine. Yeah, yeah. IT wasn't what you were used. And also you're like, i'm not doing anything that would make .

me and that was the thing. Like I didn't change. Like my work out routine at all. I didn't change. Like I like eating regiment at all and I was just like what is happening to my body.

I think that like piece us is so common and it's so fucking terrifying like you said, like when you're like i'm literally doing nothing but my body is changing before my and I have absolutely no control over this um and for you like birth control didn't work but the IDE is working. Like again, it's I have such empathy for all of us. Like like I said, like we started this conversation because.

I remember when I called you from the like, other thing that I was going through for that procedure. And then like with this stuff, it's like you just sit and you feel like the only people that you can connect to in these moments are women. And I love math so much and he's like, he's like all cancelled like my meetings and he wants to come to the guano with me and he's like all just sit in the lobby that I want to be there for you and they're so supportive and they're amazing.

But like no one understands this like women and it's it's terrifying. But I think speaking about these type of things is the way that can hopefully we get one woman off the cow should be like, you know what hit my guy? I'm going to the guy know and i'm going to make my first appointment and so long um because this scarious thing is not knowing and it's scary for like a little bit to know if there is bad news. But then like you had learned, then once you know you can fucking do something about IT if you don't know who the fuck knows we're going to wake .

up with with the P S. And like the birth control at the moment, like I had a reason, I was like, thank god because I was like what is happening right?

Like answers help your mental health process things when you're leg spiralling, you could be thinking it's one thousand nine hundred million to get things. So thank you for sharing laun. I can only imagine how many people are onna write them to me, and I obviously don't have social media, so I will be screen chatting and sending all the dms. Everybody flood my dms and in love for sharing her story, but thank you for sharing because I know this is going to help so many women and it's like me even saying that is like, underrated, probably what this is going to do. So thank you.

I love you. Yours love you. Dad, again, check your boobs.

Check the boobs to save the boobies.

bye.