#2182 - Michael Malice
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The Joe Rogan Experience. Train by day, Joe Rogan Podcast.

I have to announce, because Netflix is making me announce this, that I have a Netflix special that's live Saturday night from San Antonio. Oh. So it's going to be live all over the world. I'm going to see you tomorrow. Oh, yay. Oh, yeah, we're coming. Yeah, yeah. It's going to be a lot of fun. I've seen your set. It's really funny. It's tight now. It's good. It's like I'm very happy with it. How long has it been since you dropped the special? Six years. Six years.

Wait, dude, seriously? Yeah, I was ready to do one in August of 2020 when the shit went down. So when the shit went down with the COVID stuff, I was preparing. So that was like March, right? I was preparing to do one in August. And then I didn't do stand-up for like eight months. And then we started doing stand-up out here again. And then I started changing a lot of bits and moving stuff around. And I'm like, I don't want to do one right now.

And I sort of just really enjoyed fucking around and just doing comedy for doing comedy, you know, and then doing it at the club. And when the club opened, it was just so much fun. It was just...

It's just such a fucking joy to be there all the time. I get anxious to get back there. I can't wait. I was there opening night. Yeah. And I was there with my protege, Trey. We're in the green room. And I'm very much like, okay, this isn't your house. Be respectful of the space. Because I'm not a comic. Tim Dillon's there who I'm pals with. Ron White. Oh, my God, Ron White. Tony, the crew. And then I hear the voice say,

And Roseanne walks in. Right? And I'm like, oh, fucking shit.

And I'm like, "Alright, keep it cool." And I hear her say, "Yeah, when you get to be my age, you either have diarrhea or you're constipated." So when I was on Tucker Carlson, my son's like, "Mom, you've never been more personable." I go, "Yeah, that's because I shit myself." And I'm sitting there, I'm like, "Okay, here's your opening." And I go, "You stole that line from the president."

And she goes, what? No. Who said I had her head still flicking around? And then I'm talking to her. She didn't know you? Of course she didn't know me. You know, she's a boomer, right? So I'm sitting there. And the thing is, look, you hang out with like part of your act. You hang out with Elon. You hang out with like these major figures. Who do I get? I'm like the Make-A-Wish kid who's got a cold. And they're like, we can get you Dave Smith. Maybe Lex Friedman, right? So I'm chatting with her.

And she's going on about how there's the book of Esther, which is a Jewish story from the Old Testament. It's a story of Purim, which I learned when I was in Yeshiva. And she's going on about Vashti. One of the characters is trans and she's got a dick. And they didn't teach us this in Jewish school, I assure you. She's like, you didn't know Vashti was trans? And I'm sitting there. I'm trying to keep up with her. I don't know what the hell she's talking about. Yeah.

She's off the rails. But the whole time I'm like, holy shit, Roseanne is yelling at me. One of my favorite videos from the store, you can find it on my Instagram, Jamie, of Roseanne dancing. She's smoking a cigarette and dancing while the get it together bitch sign is illuminated in the background. Oh, yeah.

It's such a fucking great video. I've been hanging out with her, and it's like one of the greatest things that's ever happened to me. Oh, she's such a character. Yeah, because the thing is, if I make her laugh, it's like the show. Yeah. But if I don't make her laugh and she yells at me, well, Roseanne's yelling at me, which is also a win. She believes some crazy stuff, but she's open to be informed. Yes. If you tell her that this is actually what's going on. She doesn't dig her heels in. I try to explain to her contrails.

Yeah. That they probably do spray things in the air. Sure. It probably does happen. But that's not what you're seeing all the time. What you're seeing all the time is a hot jet engine encountering condensation. It literally creates clouds. It's a physical effect. You can recreate it over and over and over again. That doesn't mean...

That people don't spray shit in the sky. And it doesn't mean that they haven't experimented with things. Because they're already talking to you about experimenting with weather modification. First of all, they have some data. And some data that they have is actually from 9-11 because of the contrails.

So the contrails, when they stopped being a thing because they shut the entire air travel system down in the United States for how long? Was it a couple of days? Yeah, it was more than that, don't you think? Yeah, it might have been a week. How long did they shut the air for? It was a while. So what happened was the Earth's temperature actually increased. The temperature in the United States increased.

By a measurable amount, right? So it's very small, but it's measurable. And it's because there's no clouds. So those clouds that those planes create by flying overhead all the time, those things are consistently blocking out the sun to the point where it actually changes the temperature of the Earth.

So one of the things they found out about boat travel, you know, shipping containers, these gigantic ships, when NATO imposed... Two days. Two days, yeah. So when they imposed new, I don't know who it was, NATO, whoever it was, imposed new environmental restrictions on these giant cargo ships...

Once they did that, they found that the surface temperature of the ocean actually increased because they weren't blowing pollution over the ocean so much so that it creates like a foggy haze that actually measurably blocks the amount of sunlight that goes through it. So ironically, like in trying to cool the ocean by –

decreasing our carbon footprint, they actually increase the surface temperature of the ocean. That also gets to the whole thing about how it's not necessarily a bad thing if temperature increases because there's more life at the equator than at the poles. And it's not necessarily bad if you're going to get things slightly warmer and maybe it's the speed that's the issue, but they never even take that into consideration. As long as there's any change, it can only be for the worse. Well, it's also a business. This is where we have to be really careful with this stuff because I'm very environmentally conscious. I love...

wilderness and earth and the ocean. I love all these things. There's a bunch of things that we should address as human beings. The biggest one, unfortunately, is that we've decimated all fish life in the ocean.

Somewhere in the neighborhood of 94%. Is that what it is? What's the number of 94? I think it's 94% of all big fish are missing from the ocean. The differences between the numbers of 100 years ago versus today, it's down 94%. Wait, hold on. What do you mean by big fish? Do you mean like whale sharks? No, no, no, no, no, no. Like tuna, fish that we eat. Okay, yeah. All the swordfish, all these different fish that we commercially capture.

Those things are decimated, just decimated. It's a fucking disaster. And it's not a lot of these- 90%. Wow. 90%, a larger fish in the ocean are gone. We take through overfishing, unsustainable overfishing. So the real fear is that if we keep going like this for another 100 years, there's nothing left.

And it's very difficult to impose these restrictions on these boats that are in the middle of the ocean that are from other countries. Well, the other issue is bycatch, where you're killing a lot of things that you didn't really want to have captured. And also you have – if you have –

You remove the predators, then the prey explode in population like with deer. Yeah. And then they're everyone's front lawn. And that's a whole cascade effect there. I that 90 percent number seems because how would they have had that data 100 years ago, though? Well, fish markets. Right. So if you talk to anybody who's a sushi chef that's ever been to the famous fish markets in Tokyo, they're so amazing that I was only in Tokyo for two days. It was amazing.

I had just flown in. We did the weigh-ins. I was out of it. I was like, God, I should get up at 5 in the morning and go to the fish market. And I didn't do it. I'm fucking kicking myself. It's supposed to be incredible. I was just there. Oh, really? I came here to yell at you.

Oh, no, I'm not even kidding. No, no, no, like, you know the guy who goes to Japan once and it's like you got to go to Japan That's me. I've been to Japan. Unfortunately, I was very there very briefly. That's not just Yeah, it was beautiful though. I loved it I loved the audience the audience at the fights were so respectful and they were so knowledgeable Like if someone passed guard everyone would clap. I was like, wow, this is wild. I was really I

angry at all the misconceptions that I was taught about Japan and Japanese people. Like I thought that everyone would be like a robot. They were great sense of humor, very friendly. And the thing that they have there that we don't have here is like everyone really takes pride in what they do.

And like you see it in just regular stores and things like that, restaurants. Like they love their country. Do you know who Sakuraba is? Isn't he a fighter? Yes. Legendary fighter who used to smoke cigarettes and drink constantly. And he beat everybody. He was like one of the greatest of all time. He's an incredible, incredible fighter and mostly fought people way bigger than him.

way bigger than him. He fought a lot of absolute killers. And he is like one of the funniest guys, like in all of combat sports. He's always like got this great sense of humor. He's always joking around with people. There's all these videos of him joking around with fighters. He's a sweetheart of a guy and he's Japanese. Yeah. I went to Numazu, which is this little port town in

and it looked like something out of Lovecraft because it's clearly declining. So you go down the main street all the way to the ocean, or the sea, rather, everything is closed, all boarded up.

Because that's the world's only deep sea aquarium. And I'm into that very much. And I'm like, all right, we got to go to Nirmazu when we're there. How do they do it? How does a deep sea aquarium work? How deep does the water get? Well, the thing is the fish, I guess they're caught with bycatch because the issue is the pressure, right? You bring them up, their eyes explode, their stomachs explode. I don't know how they had the things that they had in those tanks. Like the tanks are not pressurized. It's not possible. But they had a lot of insanely cool shit there. So do the fish adapt, do you think? Maybe these are fish that...

But no, some of the batfish are like, don't vertically, some fish vertically migrate, right? Have you ever been to the one that's in the Mandalay Bay in Vegas? No, I don't think I have. It's fucking incredible. But it's not like this. This is the only one. This is the only one on Earth. The one in Mandalay Bay is sharks. Holy shit, look at that thing. That's a coelacanth. Yeah, that's the one that they thought was extinct. Right, for what, 65 million years. So it's just an amazing, amazing place. And the thing is, right around the corner-

It was so cool. What a cool fish that is. That is an old-ass fish. Yeah, because it's- That fish is from like the beginning of life. And they've got lobed fins. There's only two fish that still have lobed fins. What does that mean? You can see how there's like an- Oh, like it has bones that stick out. Yeah, the fin doesn't attach directly to the body. There's like a lobe. So them and lungfish are the only ones who have that anymore. Coelacanth, I think it has bones in there because-

You know, there's a lot of these animals. One of the weirdest ones is like there was an animal that became a whale and it was a land animal. Right. You know about that one? Of course. It was like a hippo kind of thing. Yeah, weird fucking looking thing. And that thing became a whale. It was a carnivore. Yeah. Well, whales are carnivores. I know, which is nuts, right? But they kind of are. They're sweet about it. They only eat the little bitch ass creatures. Not the sperm whales. What do they eat? Giant squid.

Do they? Oh, that's right. And they shoot sonic waves and like boil the water. What? Yeah. Sperm whales. Sonic waves and they boil the water. Really? Like a sperm whale can kill you by just vibrating. Like there was a diver who was with him and they can fuck you up really bad. Wow. No shit. Oh, yeah. Because they're like, what, 80 feet? They're huge. And their entire bulbous nose is to have this. Yeah, there you go.

Whoa, acoustic prey debilitation hypothesis or the big bang theory. The theory states that sperm whales can produce ultrasonic noises that are too high in frequency for humans to hear and that these sounds can create shock waves that could injure prey. However, some studies have not found evidence to support this theory. There was a diver who had it happen. Like this is part of Blue Planet or one of those BBC shows.

Well, I mean, it kind of makes sense. Yeah. I mean, especially when you look at the size of their mouth and the noises they make. Sperm whales can reach up to 200...

How cool is that? I have a sperm whale tooth for my shaving brush. And how wild is that? That fucking thing breathes air. And that thing used to be on land. And it's like, meh. I'm going to go hang out here and change everything. There's that meme about the fish went to the land and you evolved to go back to the sea, but you're not as good as you were before because you have gills. Then you become a penguin. It's a whole—you can't do either. It's a whole thing. No, but it's—so the thing I want to talk about in Umazu—

There was this little sushi place that I spent 15 minutes looking up this place because I want to give the guy a shout out called Iriichi. I-R-I-I-C-H-I. It's in Japanese and Google Maps. And it's just a dude.

Two tables and he's been there for 30 years and he goes to the fish market. He marinades the fish It was one of the best experiences of my life, but they were having so much fun the waitress You know this it's like him in the waitress and she goes Ev and she's got her like broken English She goes every morning. He goes to fish market serious face serious

Serious face and picks out the fish and he was delighted to be like try my food like he puts joy into his work Yeah, you saw Jiro Dreams of Sushi right? Well I put in my phone I like you better than Jiro and he lost it Well Jiro's probably like the guy now where all the other like sort of incognito sushi places that are legendary they're like hey what the fuck I think Jiro the thing Jiro seems like it wouldn't be fun

Feels like you're taking a test cuz he's so serious cuz he's so serious. Yeah, I know what you're saying So this guy was more fun. Yeah, and I the thing I found is a lot of these high-end places You should know this better than I do. They're not all stuffy a lot of times there They know how to have a good time. Oh, yeah. Do you know why you mafia? Where's that? No, okay. Why do you mafia is a Tokyo establishment and they did a pop in in Austin at a

at Pasta Bar. So Pasta Bar, do you know Philip Franklin Lee? He's the guy that owns sushi. He started here with...

sushi bar and then it became he branched out into his own thing which is sushi by scratch and he also does this other thing in town called pasta bar and at pasta bar they brought in this Wagyu Mafia guy and they like put on a fucking show like this is but it's fun it's smiling right yeah everyone's having good time oh my god it was so fun it was so silly yeah yeah everything was silly they feed you sometimes and it's like

It's like they blow gold dust over the air. It's not stuffy at all. So he's like the complete opposite of Jiro Dreams of Sushi, but insane experience. But Jiro is not what Japan... I thought Japan was going to be like Jiro, and it wasn't. Dude's making swords.

Like if I don't like the food he just stabs himself in the stomach. No, but like dudes like fucking hammering out swords. That's what I think about. You know, you think about like the craftsmanship and the seriousness. But there's so, like the economics of the place I don't understand because they have these big like office buildings like in Herald Square in New York. And it'll be like 13 floors and each floor has like six rooms. They can take an elevator and

And it's a guy, no windows, two tables and a bar. And I grew up on like role-playing games. It's like the guy in the armor shop. Like he's always there. Like, I don't know what his life is, but he takes pride in his cocktails. There's just room for five people. I don't know how he stays in business, but there's hundreds of them. And it's so everyone's the thing that angered me as a former New Yorker. You're out at night. Everyone's out in the streets. Everyone's plastered. Everyone's having fun and it's perfectly safe.

So when you look at New York and San Fran and L.A., this is completely on purpose. Like, it does not have to be this way. It was such a great time. Is it on purpose or is it neglect that no one steps in to correct? Correct.

If you're arresting someone 30 times and putting him back on the street, like that's on purpose. Right. But that's the officer that's doing that. No, it's not the officer. The police department and the prosecutor and the district attorney. But then there's the politicians that are like in control of these areas. And then there's a tone that these areas have that's being controlled by the district attorney.

Yes, but how they prosecute things and all this is all very very political. Yes So that part of the part that's the part that maybe looks like it looks like yes Yes, because of course correcting at all at all, but I feel like at this stage It's gotten it's so pervasive like the places where this crime and violence are so bad and they've been that way for so fucking long like you would take a monumental effort and

That we just aren't capable of doing. Like, we don't have $175 billion to fix all... Oh, wait a minute. We just gave all that money to Ukraine. Yeah. Oh, wait, we could have fixed it. Yes, very easily. That's the dumbest part of the argument. And it's not a lot... We don't have the resources for it, but we have all these resources for all these other things. And it's a small percent of people causing all the problems, like a Pareto effect, was like 20% of people caused 80% of the problems. It's not...

It's not like everyone in New York is a criminal. No. No, it's a lot of career criminals in New York. A lot of people that do the break-ins in the cars and stuff like that, they get arrested all the time. What was that guy, Jordan Neely, who tried to kidnap a girl? He punched an old lady in the face for no reason, broke her orbital socket, the one who was killed on the subway by that good Samaritan. It's like you punch an old lady in the face once.

and break her orbital socket for no reason once, that's a wrap. Yeah. That guy, he was prosecuted or he's being charged. Has he gone through the whole trial? I don't think he has at all. He should be mayor. This is the guy that choked the guy to death. Yeah. Looks like he got him in a rear naked choke and didn't let go.

What was the cause of death? Did the guy have a heart attack? That's a good question. Because a lot of times... If you're naked, it's hard to kill someone. You've got to really hold on for a long time. You've got to hold on for quite a while. But you can have a heart attack if someone's choking you. And you'll feel it. The guy will get loose. You know he's out. You remember the Eric Gardner case? Of course. That one made me sick. The only person who went to jail was the photographer.

Oh, that's so crazy. Why'd he go to jail? I don't remember what they got him for, but the cops had barely any consequences. The guy died for no reason. No, Nick, the guy was just selling loose cigarettes. Right. I knew a dude who knew him. And it's horrific. It's horrific, and it's also, it's like, they tried to pretend that wasn't a choke.

Like, come on, man. You know how to choke people. But even if it was... You choked him. He's selling cigarettes. Calm down. Loose cigarettes. It's nothing. And it's like, what is it? It's interfering with the business next to it where he buys the cigarettes?

What are you gonna do? Right, you know is it in there isn't there worse problems in this fucking world? There's some guy who's an entrepreneur. You don't have to buy the cigarettes from that guy, right? You don't know he wasn't in the store He's just selling loose cigarettes, right? Like if somebody doesn't have enough money for a pack of cigarettes But they have enough money for two cigarettes this guy will sell them two cigarettes And I also think it's insane to make cigarettes more expensive on purpose for to screw with poor people they do That's the point. Wait a minute these syntaxes. Yes, I

Oh, I see. They want to make it really hard to buy cigarettes. Well, it's just they just know that people are hooked and they can just steal money from you. That's really what it is. They know you're hooked on cigarettes. No, no, no. It's not the tobacco companies that are selling these prices. It's the governments. Right. They want it as expensive as possible because the idea, like Bloomberg says, is so it's harder for people to get.

keep committed to this habit. Oh, that's interesting. I think that's a nice excuse for we know they are going to keep buying cigarettes. I don't think it's an excuse at all. This is the guy who banned Big Gulps.

Do you think he banned Big Gulps because of insurance companies? No, I think he banned Big Gulps because he's a goody two-shoes and thinks he knows best for everybody. But when I hear things like that, I'm always like, okay, what's the financial incentive behind that? Because insurance companies could be like, you know what, people are dying all the time, and one of the big causes is obesity. And one of the big problems with obesity is people drink Big Gulps.

Like, this is why they made seatbelt laws. They didn't make seatbelt laws to make us safe. They make seatbelt laws because of insurance companies. Oh, I thought you meant they're going to say they made seatbelt laws because fatties can't fit into them to wipe out the fatties. I'm like, all right, there's a eugenics thing going on here. I can see it. No. It's, I mean, if they're trying to outlaw big gulps.

I feel like, first of all, fuck you. Right. If I want a Big Gulp, I know it's bad for me. You know, if you outlaw Big Gulp so you don't outlaw that Dunkin' Donuts Blizzard thing, you know that one? Oh, God. What is it, like 1,500 calories? No, no, no. It's probably like thousands, but it's 186 grams of sugar. Oh.

Is that what it is? What is the... It's so crazy. There's a dude who did a YouTube video and he shows the actual sugar that's in the drink next to the drink. It's fucking half sugar, man. It's like three Big Macs. And you think because you're drinking it, it can't be that bad. That's the thing. Big Macs are way better for you. Yes, which is crazy. Big Macs are fucking like grass-fed meat. Oh my... The thing that's insane is... 14 donuts. I've had...

How is that even... It's so crazy. They just filled it up with sugar. Jamie, see if you can find the video... A thousand calories. It's only a thousand? That's not the blizzard, though, is it? The blizzard's the big bad boy. See if you can find the video of the guy showing the sugar content in the blizzard. There's a video this dude does it online. I think it's the one...

Yeah, that's it. Right there. Look at all that fucking sugar. 181 grams of sugar. Nearly three quarters of a two liter bottle of Coke. Let's measure that. Look at all this sugar. Look, just imagine eating all that sugar in one session. Holy fuck, that's bad for you. Holy fuck. It's just bulking. And dude, if you don't eat that way all the time, like I had a milkshake once.

Like a big-ass chocolate milkshake. I don't really do that most of the time and it was like I hit with a tranquilizer dart I was like, oh my god Well for me, I have a big tooth But if I if I sometimes I might go on a binge and you just eat bags of gummy candy I am wired wired for how long though a while it's it's a while but you don't crash afterwards Like I go to bed. I do this for if I'm bitching I'm like this right for bed. Yeah

I don't bathe during the day. I've heard people say that, like eating a high-carb meal before bed. I've heard people talk about doing that. They eat a high-carb meal so that their insulin spikes and then they just fucking crash afterwards. I don't sleep issues, so I feel bad for people who do. It's a rough thing to have, man. I had Honey Smacks cereal and the first ingredient is sugar. Yeah.

And I'm thinking to myself, like, how are these being held together? Because they don't look like sugar cubes. It's mostly sugar. It looks like grains. How is that even physically possible? They used to be called sugar smacks. Oh, yeah. Sugar bear was the name. They're so good. And then sugar golden crisps, whatever. Well, we used to eat Frosted Flakes, and then we would put sugar on the Frosted Flakes.

I eat Lucky Charms still. They're really good. It's fucking good, man. It's good. It should be legal. And you mix it with your protein drink, so that way you get your protein. First of all, people need access to real food primarily. But every now and then, a fucking blizzard from Dunkin' Donuts should be on the menu. If you want to, you should be able to. It's ridiculous. But if you want to have a—you know what I love? Tiramisu. That's my favorite dessert. Okay.

And if I'm stuffed, it's the end of the meal and they, and you know, it's an Italian place and you open up the, oh,

But it's also kind of crazy because like tiramisu, I love key lime pie. I love key lime pie. I could have like three bags of candy. Like it looks like because it's cake. You think, oh, it's not that bad for you. It's filled with sugar. It's just, it's insane. Tiramisu is so much sugar, but it's so good. Yeah, it is. Oh my God. It's so good. Those lady fingers that are dipped in espresso. What about in those, all those steakhouses where their chocolate cake is like 1,500 calories a slice. And I'm like, how are you doing this mathematically? American steakhouses, like they-

They are trying to kill you. They're trying to get you. Wait, where's the tinfoil hat? They're trying to stuff you as much as possible. And I mean it in the best possible way. But if you go to like in town, like say if you go to Eddie V's. Yeah. You go to Eddie V's and you get the lobster mashed potatoes. You can't stop eating. You cannot stop eating. They have the calorie counts at Eddie V's.

Do they? Which is useful. Well, if I don't have glasses on, I can't read that shit. They may get little tiny numbers next to the food.

The fuck out of here. But if you go to another country, they don't eat like us. We eat like slobs. Yeah. We have giant ass pizzas. That's why you should go to Japan. Oh, very much more disciplined than us. You don't see fat people as much. I had whale eight ways. Oh, wow. It was really whale? Yeah. Whoa, that's weird. Apparently whale is like a poor people food there. Wow. But they're our homies. Why are you eating our homies?

Well, you're in Japan, you know. Got to do as the Japanese do. I wonder how smart they really are. They're pretty smart. Because people always say that whales are super smart. But, you know, it's just because they can communicate. We have a weird definition of intelligence, right? Because we really favor things that can control their environment and change their environment, like build houses and structures. Not necessarily. Ants do that. We don't think ants are smart. Yeah, but we do. We do think they're smart. No, we don't. We think they're smart in a weird way. Well, they're skilled.

It's not just they're skilled. They know how to make these chambers that ferment leaves and they have a like the leafcutter ants do? Yes. I was watching them last night. That's pretty creepy. You brought that up. Fucking incredible. Because there's a video about how did this evolve because the fungus that's in the leafcutter ant colony is not the same species any longer as this fungus that's outside. Right. So intelligence is not the right word. You're right. The right word is capable of incredible order and they have a pattern in their mind they follow.

Much like bees, but you don't have to teach bees how to make beehives They make beehives everywhere right all over the fucking place. So it's some It's so they're making a structure. What is it? There's some animal is it the puffer fish where they gave them like? Ritalin or they gave them like Lexa for something and the patterns all changed and

Wow like they gave him some SSRI something it whatever it was and they changed how they like spiderwebs Maybe it was and it changed. Oh, yes. They definitely was spiderwebs I saw them there's a bunch of different things they did with spider-webs and one of them they gave it LSD okay? I

He remembers when he was like a shitty shopkeeper. Oh, yeah, there it is. Thank you, Jay. Yeah, there it is. So normal marijuana. Marijuana sucks. It's terrible. Benzedrine. What's that, an upper? Benzies? I don't know. That's like a 70s thing. That's not benzodiazepine, right? Benzodiazepine is Xanax. What's a benzadrine, Jamie? It's an upper. Caffeine. Caffeine's all over the place. Chlorohydrate. Who's getting high on chlorohydrate? What is chlorohydrate? I have no idea. What's chlorohydrate, Jamie?

What's Benzadrine? How weird is it that they pick chloral hydrate? Why would you pick alcohol? Well, you'd probably kill it, right? Maybe, right? Sedative. Sedative. Okay. Short-term treatment of insomnia. There you go. So is Benzadrine an upper? It must be. Benzos, that's a thing from the 70s. They were all on them. Well, I think that's benzodiazepine, though. I think Benzos- It's an amphetamine. Okay, yeah. Benzadrine. Okay, yeah. I don't think that's Benzos, though. What is a Benzo? A Benzo's an upper. Okay.

Is it? I thought it was Xanax. Because Benzo... We're like school moms. Yeah, there's extra. The Diaz is... Oh, the Benzos are depressants. That's interesting. That's the Xanax. So that's Benzos when people say the term Benzos? Or Downers. Okay. What's a Black Beauty? Because that's what they all used to take in the 70s. I don't know.

Is that speed? I think so. A lot of guys took speed and played pool. It was a big thing. The guys would play on amphetamines. I know one time the Go-Go's took a bunch of downers and they had to perform sitting down on chairs. Oh, that's what that means. Yeah. Our lips are sealed. Black capsule. Amphetamines. Okay, uppers. Yeah. Yeah.

Dextroamphetamine, yeah. Okay. These guys who would play pool on it, they said that makes them see angles better. Well, because it's like speech. It's like Ritalin. I've never done Ritalin either. No, but, or like Adderall, excuse me. I've never done Adderall. Neither have I, but you know people... I'm scared of it. You're crazy focused. I'm scared of that. Why are you scared of focus? Well, the same reason why I don't do... I've never done cocaine. Well, you've never done cocaine? I do.

Having been to Japan, having done cocaine... First of all, sir, cocaine's illegal. Son of a bitch. Second of all...

I think I'd like it. No, you wouldn't. Yeah, I'm sure I'd like it. No, you wouldn't. Not to the extent that people ruin their lives. Oh, I wouldn't ruin my life. It's the stupidest drug. Yeah, I'm not really interested in ruining my life. But I would recognize that this is probably a lot of fun. It's not. But how come so many people say it is? I don't know. It's not fun at all. For you. It would not be fun for you. I promise you. Have you ever heard the Buck Cherry song, Cocaine? All lit up. You know that song? No. That song makes me want to do coke. Oh, yeah.

The idea of Coke is a lot... Let's play this song. Okay. I fucking love Buck Cherry. This episode is brought to you by Experian. How many subscriptions do you have? It might take you longer than you think to figure it out. These days, it's far too easy to get a load of subscriptions that you might completely forget about. That's why I love services like Experian.

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He was in Alcoholics Anonymous meeting and the dude from Buck Cherry was there. Yeah. And this model went on stage and she was telling her sober stories and she was saying, I was just doing coke and just fucking all these rock stars. And he goes, yeah. Yeah.

In the middle of an AA meeting. Now again, this is secondhand. I don't know if this is true, but I love these guys. Come on, son. That makes me want to do blow. I interviewed Belinda Carlyle from the Go-Go's because she was a coke head. And I said, explain this to me. Because if it's a rock star who's a dude, he's having coke orgies with all these chicks. You're a girl. You're not having them run train on you. Literally, what would you do? And she said, I would go in my hotel room

Take the phone off the hook, close the blinds, and pace like an animal. And I go, oh, that sounds like a lot of fun. She goes, oh, yeah, it was a blast. So what I tell you, you're not going to like it. It's like giving yourself a panic attack. Yeah, but some people love it. I know you well enough to tell you you're not going to like it. Good, thank you. Well, I wasn't going to try it anyway. Not even on a bucket list thing? Nope. For the same reason why I won't try Adderall.

Adderall seems much more... That's different. Adderall you would like. That's the problem. Because there's upsides. Oh, okay. Yeah, the productivity part. There's a lot of upsides, yeah. And you're like, oh, shit. Anything... Adderall helps you, like, understand... I've never done it. Helps you understand your brain better because you're like... You see yourself like, oh, this is how my brain's working and whatever. Coke is just like you just wait and do more Coke. And I've...

It's just, I don't get it. Expand on that. So Adderall helps you know how your brain's working? You know how when you're in a kind of altered consciousness, you realize that your brain has a character of its own, and most people aren't introspective and just take their thoughts for granted, but people who work with psychedelics, things like that, realize, okay, there's ways I can have different perceptions, different focuses, different senses of self in relation to the world, things like that. Adderall, from my understanding, it's like,

It's like that movie Limitless. It's based on Adderall, right? I thought that was based on that other shit. New Vigil? Yeah. Pro Vigil and New Vigil. Maybe I'm wrong. I don't know either. Point being, when you take it, you supposedly are super focused, but you realize, okay, I can fine tune the speed of my thinking.

So that's fascinating that your brain has like like a bike has different speeds if I'm using that metaphor correct I just know way too many people that enjoy it on a regular basis Yeah, and it's I had a friend who got hooked on it and she was like this is bad It just seems to keep them going All day right high achievers right people doesn't do that a lot of journalists

And a lot of college kids now. A lot of college kids. Yeah. They used to be cokeheads when we were kids. Now they're on Adderall. I've asked friends who've done it and gone on stage. I said, never again. Anybody's ever gone on stage on Adderall? They're like, no. Really? Why? Yeah, like not having fun. Too tense. Yeah. Just not like silly. You're not loose. You're wired. You're clenching your jaw. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. You wouldn't like coke. Yeah.

I'm surprised you don't want to just try everything once. What was that noise? I'm busy. I got a Netflix special coming up. You can't try everything once because you'd be trying too many things. There's not that many. And then you'd have to recover. I have responsibilities. But I do think that having all these things illegal or having most of them illegal is a fucking travesty. I agree with you as an anarchist, but then what happened in Portland...

Or wherever Seattle it was, was a real problem. Yeah, but that also coincided with terrible leadership, where the mayor was saying when they took over a giant swath of the city that it was the summer of love. Remember that crazy shit? Those people were retarded. That whole fucking philosophy up there is so stupid. It's a suicide cult. They legitimately are going to destroy their society.

And they're all like, yay, diversity. They'll be waving their fucking pride flags as the city sinks into the ocean. They're out of their fucking minds.

So you can't look at that place and say this is what happens you make drugs legal No, that's what happens you make drugs legal in a place run by Maniacs a place run by people think it's fine to have tents everywhere and give people money to shoot up and give them clean needles And I give them money every month to stay homeless I hear you but my point is you and I both know a lot of people who are like waiting for the psychedelics, right and

And if psychedelics become fully legal and corporations take over, there's going to be downsides. I think if the corporations do the psychedelics, they'll probably have a different approach to how they interact with humanity. If the CEOs and all these people realize, like, you are going to die.

And if you're wasting all your time trying to squeeze as much money as humanly possible out of every person that interacts with your company, you're not living a harmonious life. And it doesn't mean that you can't make a lot of money and sell things. But you can make a lot of money and sell things with a psychedelic capitalist perspective where you're not trying to do evil. You're just trying to be fair about it. I agree with everything you said. Oh, very utopian, though.

But I'm saying there's plenty of people who, if they start getting on these drugs and being introspective, they're not going to like what they see. And there's going to be a lot of things that come up, and it's not going to be an easy transition toward a better person for some of them. And it'll be much harder to get a good burger. It's going to quit those jobs. I'm talking about, like, these corporate people. I understand. And also, like, you— But even the corporate people, like— Look what they did with Housewives and all the speed that they were on. Oh.

Oh, yeah, but that's the housewife's fault. They liked it too much. Yeah, but they were told this is a diet pill. Well, better that or a lobotomy. Like, we only have a few options back then. I don't think those were the two. Mother's Little Helper, remember? From Rolling Stone song? I mean, they stopped doing lobotomies in 67. So they were doing lobotomies for like 50 fucking years, scrambling people's brains. They did it to Rosemary Kennedy. Didn't they do it because she was promiscuous? And also she was kind of a slow person.

And the thing with the lobotomy, did you know about this? You have to do it when the person's conscious. Yeah. So she had to count backwards, and then she stopped being able to talk. And then they pretended she's on sabbatical for 50 years. And then they did the Special Olympics because they felt bad. Oh, my God. Evil, evil family.

Well, it's an evil practice, that thing that they would do for people when they had troubles. I love the idea. It's just so insane that, like, there's no precision, really. You're stabbing them in the head. Scrambling brains. And hoping you hit the right spot. That's not a thing. I think they're going to look at that the same way they look at, the way they look at that now. They're going to look at sex change for kids in the future. Yes. Oh, yes. They're going to look at all this. Munchausen's by proxy.

Also, there's clearly like a mind virus, and it is like a mind virus. I mean, that term mind virus, it sounds like you shouldn't say that because a virus doesn't exist in the mind. It's a different kind of thing than an actual biological virus, but it has the same function. It really does. Ideas go viral.

Yeah, they do. That's the thing. The idea is going viral. The thing is, when you and I were kids, as dinosaurs, every girl or 90% of them had an eating disorder because she was uncomfortable. Her body's changing, unwanted male attention, having that sense of control. It was very common. Very common. A lot of people didn't grow out of it, but most of them did. Now, if you're uncomfortable with your body...

You're going to be shifted down in this direction in many such cases. And it's really – Carol Markowitz, who's a journalist, she was a neighbor of mine in Brooklyn, she said a majority of kids in her daughter's class were identifying as some variant of queer. So she's like, I'm out of here. I'm going to Florida. So strange. Strange isn't the word. It's –

It's it's a and the thing is with but it is also strange with eating disorders. You can get over it, right? This is gonna cause permanent damage Did you see what this this evil demon from the LA Times there was a woman girl named Chloe Cole and

who was a detransitioner. I've heard of her. And they had this whole hit piece on her. Oh, no. Oh, she's become beloved by the right. It's like, this is someone telling their real... And she's not unique. Telling her story about, like, I wasn't old enough to make these decisions and I'm fucked for life. I'm never gonna have sexual...

pleasure and my body's changed and I regret this enormously and I thought I wanted this and I was wrong and it's like oh there's just a hatchet piece I think I forgot the girl's name it's just horrible could you imagine if it was instead the right that was promoting this how the left would react the right used to it was a um

conversion therapy. This is their version. Right, praying the gay away. Yeah. Yeah. But not as extreme in the sense that you're not doing surgery on people, especially on children and giving them hormone blockers. But imagine if that was the right's perspective, if the right's perspective was akin to Iran's perspective. So,

So in Iran, you have a very high number of transsexuals. By law. Because it's illegal to be gay. Right. Now imagine if that was going on with the right here. They're saying, no, you can't be gay, but you can be trans and you can become a woman. And so they're encouraging it and then...

profiting off of it and then shaming anyone that detransitions like that person. Imagine if that was all being done by the right. People would think it's so fucking evil. The thing that's also crazy is everyone who questions their gender is trans. No one just...

has issues with their gender. Not only that, there's a lot of data that shows that if you let them, just leave them alone and let them go through puberty and become an adult, they usually become gay. And then a lot of gay people are like, hey, this is homophobic. This idea is homophobic. Like this idea that these people are actually in the wrong body. Like, no, they're gay. And I also talk about this a lot.

There's this complete insane, insane pretense that taking hormones, even the hormones of your own gender, has no downside whatsoever.

So if a male takes testosterone, he's not going to have any bad side effects. If a female takes estrogen, there's no bad side effects. When women are pregnant and their hormones are a mess, it's all upside. But they pretend that like, oh, if we just give this person hormones, it's only going to be a good thing. It's like there's a huge cost. But the blockers, the blockers are the crazy thing because they are literally chemical castration drugs that they would use for pedophiles.

So same drugs, but also Joe the lie that you can just start puberty later. It's a lie Absolutely a lot you will be altered forever as I never develop I am proof if your growth is stunted as a kid You don't get to grow your full height later. It's there's a window same thing with learning language These kids were feral and raised by wolves. They don't later become scholars. They lose the capacity to speak correct, right? so

the brazen lies of, well, you could just start puberty later if that's what you feel. Look at gymnasts. Again, imagine this coming from the right. Imagine. Imagine.

So this is why people are so weird. Because... And why is this politicized? It's crazy. Right? It is crazy. Why is it politicized? If there's kids who have mental illness of some kind, let's get them help. Right. And everyone's different. Right. Everyone's different. And the solution isn't necessarily give a girl a mastectomy when she's 14. That seems insane. Do you know there's... There's a new one called Neuter. What? Neuter.

And they remove, make you look like a Barbie or Ken doll. Oh, God. And Joe, you know why I made that, why I winced? Because you know it's here in Austin. The clinic is here. Oh, my God. This is what happens when you're friends with Deborah So, you learn about these things. Wait a minute. Really? It's called neuter? Yeah. How many people have they done this to? I don't know. I don't know. It's here in Austin. The guy's very proud of himself. Oh, my God. Oh, yeah. God, that's so weird. No, it's very normal.

Jesus Christ. Yep. So this is like when you go to visit the Coliseum and you're like, what happened to these people? This is us. This is us. It's just we're very fortunate to be in the middle of it and watching it all play out. There's that meme of Jesus. Yes. Now he goes, flood it again. Oh, that's funny. I saw it send in the asteroid. I saw it the other day.

I guess there's a bunch of those. Like, what the fuck, man? The thing is, the gaslighting is what bothers me. Well, it all bothers me. It all bothers me, the fragility of the human mind. So everybody forever was like, Kamala Harris is the worst vice president. She's the least popular vice president of all time. And then in a moment, a

A moment in time, all of a sudden, she's our solution. She's our hero. Everybody's with her. All these social media posts about her. Try Googling a negative story on her. You won't find one. So, you've got me started, Officer Harris. So, they've been doing this live for years. So, in 2019, our pal Tulsi...

absolutely nuked her in that second debate. And if you looked at charts at the time, she's kind of, Officer Harris is doing okay. First debate, she comes out, Joe Biden, you're a racist. The Democrats were looking for an alternative to Bernie Sanders that wasn't Biden. She starts going up in the polls, right? Second debate comes out, Tulsi, being a good Hawaiian, knows how to roast the pig. This completely slams her.

Not only that, she has no counterpunch. She goes on Anderson Cooper and she's like, well, I'm a top tier candidate. So, of course, people are going to take shots at me. That's her answer. She immediately starts going down in the polls. It's that day. You can see it on the chart I have on my Twitter. All the articles at the time that did an autopsy on Kamala Harris's failed campaign didn't mention Tulsi once. Yeah. It was BBC.

LA Times Reuters New Yorker a guy from The Washington Post just did a piece looking back on her campaign didn't mention Tulsi either they come wild they completely Pretend it didn't happen. Well, it just shows you that what they're looking for is not what they say they're looking for Yes, because she is a strong woman She is a person who served overseas twice She in a medical unit so she got to see people blown up by the war. I

She was a congresswoman for eight years. She is a person of color. She's everything you want. All those things you want.

And yet you don't want her. Because she's not for war. Yes. Well, she's also just not willing to play ball. There's a game that's being played. And if you're like, hey, you're not supposed to fucking move the ball. Like, oh, look at this bitch over here. Like, get out of here. You're going to fuck up our game. It's not real democracy. It's controlled parties. Did you see that piece by Seymour Hersh that dropped over the weekend about the coup? Yes. So explain to people what Seymour Hersh...

I don't know if he's right, but it seems to be right a lot. And he was right about the Nord Stream pipeline, right? So what I was saying and a lot of other people were saying is the big issue is how do you get Biden out of the White House? So here's Biden's case. He's like, look, I got Trump out of the White House last time. I'm only behind two or three points in the polls. Kamala's polling worse than me in like eight out of 10 polls.

I won these delegates. Why the hell should I back down? And that's a very solid case. Jill, for the first time in her life, people care about her. She matters. As Hunter put it, I have it exactly here. She's a selfish, silly, entitled cunt. That was how Hunter described her. Whoa. Yeah, yeah. We have the text. And then all the public pressure, Biden, you got to drop out. Biden got to drop out. Biden got to drop out.

Nancy Pelosi is a gangster. I wouldn't want to fuck with her. I wouldn't want to fuck with Mitch McConnell. These people don't mess around. And everyone said, or a lot of people said, they're going to have to go to threats.

Because why else would he step down? He's earned it, that presidency, and he's earned the nomination. But if there was ever a time to invoke the 25th Amendment, wouldn't you think this is the time? Sure, but I don't think they... Hold on, hold on. Here's the thing. Let's talk about this. So Seymour Hersh, who's been around D.C. since the 60s, I believe he wrote The Dark Side of Camelot, if I'm not mistaken. He had a thing on his sub stack that goes, Biden got the call, and it was Obama...

Pelosi, former Speaker of the House, Chuck Schumer, Majority Leader, Hakeem Jeffries, current House Minority Leader, leader of the Democrats in the House. And they said, we got Kamala on board to invoke the 25th. If you don't drop the nomination, you

You know that's going to happen. The thing is you were saying they're not invoking the 25th. He's still president. Right. But I'm saying if there was a time that they were going to do that, this would be that time. It was that time four years ago. Right. But it's been that time. But clearly now. Right. More and more than ever before. Because it's public. No, it's deteriorating. I don't think he's gotten that much worse. Oh, he's got a lot worse. There's a video that compares him from 2019 to 2024. It's a market difference. Yeah. But I don't think there's a big difference in 2022 and 2024. Right.

There's like a two and a half hour compilation of the campaign in 2020 where he forgets Obama's name. Yeah, that's true. He had those gaffes back then, but they're constant now. He's barely hanging on. He was fine to stay in the union. I think it's like sundowning, you know? Okay, okay, okay. What?

You think there's a body double? That guy walked very differently than Biden. Very differently. He's a lot taller. It's on Scott Adams' Twitter. I saw that. I'm like, am I Alex Jones-ing today? No, he's a lot taller. Yeah. No, he's physically taller. Yeah, okay. And he walks way better. Like, as someone who, like, you watch Biden walk, he had a stiffness. Like, death was coming for him. And before everyone freaks out, has their mousetraps on, their heads go off, I think there should be more presidential body doubles because one president almost got murdered.

So if we have ways to keep them safe, let's use them. Okay, that's a good thing to say. We cover our ass there. And now here's another thing to say.

In the interest of national security, like let's imagine a scenario where Biden is deathly ill and Kamala is not really capable of taking over as president right now. And there is, you know, like who's next? Speaker of the House. So Nancy Pelosi. No, who's it now? Mike Johnson. Mike Johnson. Right. So that would be him next. So that's a dangerous moment in terms of national security, even though everyone knows that Biden...

Biden's, you know, really having problems. It's not actually running the show, you know, it,

Could see why they would want to use some body doubles for that of course you know if the guys in a hospital somewhere But this guy let's let's look at it because this guy please play. He don't walk like him He's taller than him it looks like like he gained like went back in time seven or eight years This is the weekend of Bernie's like prequel Well, this is like Master gaslighting and propaganda is what it is like to show you that there's a

You know, what was it in 2000 and I forget what year it was, where I believe it was during the Obama administration. Look at the size of this guy. This isn't the clip I saw. He's so much bigger. Look how big he is. He's so much bigger than Jill. He's so much bigger. Like he gained a legitimate six inches. Look how tall he looks. Look at the fringe. She's wearing heels as well. Jamie, there's one on Scott Adams' Twitter. This is from his Twitter.

Oh, but let's not it's it's the one he's walking to the helicopter. Let's watch this again. Yeah, that's another one Yeah, it's another one. That's a similar one to where you see you see what more time. Let's see him walk walk again So like look how much bigger he is than Jill. Hopefully shit. He towers over her He didn't use to tell her before I saw the other one and also if you look look look at her She's wearing high heels. See wow. Yeah, you see her high heels. Okay, and he's towering over her That is a much taller person

So maybe they hooked him up with some fucking secret sauce that's going to keep him going and he'll be back. Maybe they have ability to go back biologically. Oh, wow. Yeah. Giant difference in height. Is that because she could be behind him? No, listen, she also has high heels on, man. No, no, but on the left, it could be that she's standing. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. That's a different human.

Look at the size difference of the torso. Them walking to the helicopter is the one where it looked really different. Go back to that, please. Look at the size differences in the torsos themselves from the top of his shoulders to where- Oh, look how many buttons. Yeah, look at the white of the shirt. Yes. Just look at the size difference. Look how much longer that human is on the left.

Now, it may be Biden. Listen, they might have some wild shit that brings you back from the dead. But like medical science is getting like there's some people out there working on some wild stuff. But maybe they just fucking jolting them up with some Wolverine juice. Wolverine juice is going to make you taller. But here's the thing.

In the same way in the 60s, if you sat on the show and said Liberace is gay, people would yell at you because you've never seen him sucking a dick. Right. People right now would be like, it's impossible. Why would they do a body double? That's ridiculous. No, I don't think they would be. I don't think they would be anymore. You don't think so? No. You don't think there's a lot of people listening right now who think you're crazy? My parents.

Well, like regular people, no. Your parents don't listen to this show. No, they don't. But if they did, they're boomers. They're full on. They're full on. You've got to keep Trump out of the White House. But this, what you're seeing right here...

It really looks like a different person. Now, why are we saying that? Because it actually does look like a different person. We're not making something up. Okay. I don't do that. I don't pretend. I don't lie. I'm not a type of person that looks at something like that. And like, I have a propaganda thing I'm trying to push. Like when people say this version of Joe Biden is the best version ever. Intellectually, I'm telling you he's on point. That's not real, right? I don't do that. Yeah.

We were also told for years that these are selectively edited clips and deep fakes. No, they call them cheap fakes. Yeah, cheap fakes. Excuse me. She's calling them cheap. First of all, it's a very expensive technology. A lot of money to produce. The cope with the debate. First, I heard people say it was the fault of the lighting. I don't know what kind of lighting, unless it's some kind of space lasers. It was after his bedtime. But what kind of lighting makes you say we beat Medicare? Then people said the mic was fucked up. Well, if your mic is fucked up, why can't you breathe?

So it was amazing how all the explanations didn't explain what we all saw with our eyes. Well, we can't gaslight. I know everyone's doing this because this is how everyone's done this. I don't think you can do it this way anymore. I think this political gaslighting they do is genuinely bad for them. Not just bad for everyone and bad for the entire civilization, but genuinely bad for them.

You can't do that anymore. You because just say it everyone knows it's not everyone God so many people do and so many people your age and my age No, yes, all right I think everyone who like right now everyone who's 40 and under is fucking super skeptical of all everyone Goddamn a lot of people do a lot, but not everyone. You're right. You're right. You're right. I'm exaggerating but there's many more than

During like my parents age when they were in their 40s. You know why? Yeah, social media. Elon. Elon, yes. That's a big part. I always make this point. You don't need a majority. You only need an alternative. As long as there's one, like that little kid who said that emperor has no clothes. Yeah. As long as there's one outlet where you could be like, this seems a little weird.

then all of a sudden the truth can come out. Or at least in good questions. The dude has literally saved free speech. Yes. And that sounds so stupid to some people that are against it. Like, oh my God, you think that Nazis and hate speech and blah, blah, blah. Yeah.

Listen, it's not good that people want to type racist things. It's not good. It's not good that people target specific human beings. It's not good. It's also not good if you don't know those people exist and if people can't counter those people in those comments.

And if people can't highlight how egregious some of the things they're saying are, how awful some of the things they're saying are, and also get real information about, like, what's really going on in Venezuela, what's really going on in El Salvador, what's everywhere. And I'm also sitting here as a Jewish person who went to Jew school to tell you that the idea that you can't criticize George fucking Soros, who's a billionaire because it's anti-Semitic.

Well, that's the old Mossad tactic, right? The Mossad, there was a guy who was a Mossad agent who talked about this, like what they would do if they found out there was a journalist that was saying Israel is attacking this. You label him an anti-Semite. Yeah, but the point is they don't do this just anti-Semitism. There was racism, there was homophobia, and we're seeing it right now with Officer Harris. George Soros.

No, what I'm saying is for George Soros to be anti-Semitic, you're anti-Semitic. If you're going after Officer Harris, you're either racist or sexist or ableist. Right. So they will use... Ableist. Yeah, because she's a retard. Jesus Christ. She's literally retarded. I mean, Ukraine is a country in Europe...

And Russia is another country and a powerful country. And Russia invaded Ukraine, and that's wrong. What's really important is what can be unburdened by what has been. I think of her as America's wine mom. Because bitch seems like she's three deep by noon. And she's got the three phases of wine mom. She's got happy drunk. Oh, my God. This cereal's got a rabbit on it. It's so great. Cackling, cackling, cackling. Then there is...

Trying to drunk at work where you're trying to make sense, but you don't space is around us all and unites us all and inspires us all and then there's I'm being stern So you don't realize how plastered I am and I'm making a point that little girl was me now I'm gonna go upstairs and don't knock on the door cuz I'm gonna pass out So those are her three ways. She talks and those are the wine mom phases. Do you think they have her medicated? I

Because there was a guy that was speculating that some of the things that she says, the way she's sort of disconnected sometimes. I don't know. She goes on these rambles that it's indicative of certain anti-anxiety medication. I do not know if this is true. See if you can find that because really shouldn't say that about our future president. Yeah. She's going to win. No, she's not. She can win.

She absolutely can win. I do not think she's going to win because the more she talks, like in 2020, how bad do you have to be that you can't even make Iowa? She couldn't even compete with the mayor of South Bend. I feel like we are in this very bizarre time where people are giving in to the bullshit in a way that I never suspected people would before.

This is one they just want no Trump no matter what and they're willing to gaslight themselves this thing that and by the way I think Hillary could win if Hillary jumped back in I've been saying that for months if Hillary jumped back in I think the problem was also the money because there was the two I was like 250 million dollars in the campaign fund that has if it only works right she's on the ticket right so that's part of the problem but I

Feel like Hillary could win she won the popular vote in 2020 I'm saying this for a year in different shows and she would win it one one and Michelle Obama could win - I don't she wanted to do it. You don't think so I don't I think that's kind of this you sound like your parents. I think it says boomer idea She doesn't want it. I'm not saying that she would be awesome at it. I

But I think- I think anyone can win of either party. Whoever the nominee is. Even Chris Christie could have won if he's the Republican nominee. It's possible. I would have thought that Trump getting shot would like, that's it. Election's over. But it's like, they memory hold that so quick? You would have thought Trump getting shot-

would have had four years, eight years of corporate journalists talking about hate speech causing violence to be like, let's take a step back. And that went for what, a week? They did take a step back for a little bit. For a week. And then they went right back at them. You want to talk about this memory holing? Yeah. With the insanity of the, that was Elon who put up, like if you Google President Donald, it says President Donald Reagan.

No, I tried it. What happened? Maybe they fixed it. It said President Donald Trump. Okay. Well, he had a screenshot, so I'm sure you didn't Photoshop that. Yeah, no, no, no. I mean, it's based on a lot of things, right? Like what people are searching for. I would imagine that the assassination attempt on Trump would be the first one that you would see. Yeah. Assassination attempt on President Trump, because that's the most recent. Yes. But it's not. And most newsworthy. But it does show it.

You just have to type it all in, which is interesting because that little difference between what you can find and what you get presented immediately has a huge shift in the way people access information. And this is Robert Epstein's work. The creepy line, the documentary. Everyone should watch it. Yeah. And this thing is very real. And what it is is like if you try to Google certain negative stories, like negative stories on people, it will overwhelm you with positive stories.

It'll take a long time before you get to the negative stories. Yeah, how he explained it is if you – here's how they can tip the scale. Yeah. If I Google Hillary Clinton and I have it so Google gives fairly positive stories about Hillary as the first 10 results, you're not going to go to the second page. If I Google Donald Trump and Google gives you seven negative stories, it's going to move the needle a little bit toward her. Quite a bit. Yeah. Quite a bit.

Like if you're a person who's on the fence, you're like, maybe Donald Trump's not a bad guy. And then you Google him and then you start reading some of these like pieces that they've written about him. It'll change your perspective. You really think she's going to win? I'm saying it because she could. I'm not saying it because I think she's going to. I'm not saying because I want her to. I'm just being honest. Like I could see her winning. I don't think I think she's going to lose a lot of the blackmail vote. Really? I don't think they're going to go in the booth and pull the lever for her.

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That many men, you know, wish death upon me. And N-word and everything. Like, didn't censor it out. Everybody's like, oh, shit, he won. It was... It happened so quickly, the shift from, oh, my God, they shot him, to fuck him again. Yeah. It's like... People are questioning whether or not he actually got shot because his ear healed. Can I... Wait, I got to tell you something else about him. He was on... Who was the Fox guy who just died with Stu Varney a couple years ago? And he goes...

Stu, that's the N-word. You know what the N-word is, right, Stu? And Stu's like, oh, it goes nuclear, the nuclear word. And I was on the Blaze, Glenn Beck's network for midterms, and Trump calls in, and he's like, that's the N-word, nuclear. I'm like, are we really doing this right now? Trump is talking about the N-word, and then he means nuclear? Yeah. It was nuts. It's hilarious. What is this? Trump did not walk out to 50 Cent's.

But rather than a country singer. So is that fake? Those videos are fake? Where he walks out? Oh, so people imposed it? No, I thought the guy was saying it in disbelief. That's him going out to that song. Wait, scroll down because it says under it there was an explanation in text. What does it say there?

Oh, it was not. It was his fake. Oh, they faked it. Oh, damn it. Oh, damn it. Now we know what he should do next time. So he definitely should have came out to that. That's hilarious. Oh, my God. That would have been epic. Because 50 Cent was tweeting about him. 50 Cent had his face at his concert. So he had like, you know, he has that image of him in the back. And he put Donald Trump's head over his body. But do you know what? Maybe that's fake too. There's a big sea change because even three years ago, if you had said...

Trump kind of sucks. I don't really like him. He had no business being president. You're a Trump supporter? Because unless you say he's the worst thing to happen to America, you're a Trump supporter, right? Right, right. So for Mark Zuckerberg...

To go on camera and be like, this guy was kind of a badass and that was awesome and not to have any – and to feel safe to say that, not to have any negative consequences, that's a big deal in terms of the conversation moving. Well, I do not think that Mark Zuckerberg from my interactions with him was very comfortable with the FBI telling them to suppress the Hunter Biden laptop story. Let's talk about this because –

There's a lot of people who I don't blame them think Oh boohoo you're forced me to do it, but he's happy to do it anyway So you were saying that he actually it was like well he brought it up. I mean when I asked yeah Yeah, I asked him what they did with it. He told the whole story He didn't try to hide from it at all and he said they basically reduced its

the ability to spread it. You could post it, you could read it, you could interact with it, but they reduced its reach by like 50% or something like that or whatever the number was, which I don't understand how you do that or what are you doing? I don't know. I'll let that go. You can understand because on Facebook, which I'm not... But it's recommended. No, no, not recommended. I'm not on Facebook ever for this reason. Your feed...

I don't see all my friends' posts. Right. So if they just have it post 50% less, it's very easy to do. Right. I think that's Instagram as well. Yes, correct. Same company. Same sort of deal. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, you see that with people. That's what shadow banning is. Right. It's difficult for people to see your shit. Right. They do that on purpose. Of course they do. And they can't do it by accident. No. I mean, it's a real thing. I don't.

know if he's comfortable with the government telling them to do something that turned out to be an actual true story. Is that what he said? No. I mean, I have to imagine about him saying that that's one of the most badass things that I've ever seen. He's got a reasonable perspective because it was one of those badass things. Whether you love Donald Trump or not, let's pretend he's from another country. You have no stake in the game. That guy almost getting shot and raising his fist up like that.

And there's so many fucking weird things about that story, the story of the assassination itself. Everyone should be really uncomfortable with the fact that that happened and not like saying, you didn't even get shot. You're missing the whole point. I tweeted this out. I go, I wish the White House were freaking out about this as much as they are about climate change.

Because this would be a big moment to be like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Like this can never happen again. But when Steve Scalise got shot, they were like, and then went back to business. Like didn't shit happen. Also, why were they streaming it? They don't stream his campaign things.

They do that a lot. Do they do it a lot? Oh, yeah. They do it a lot? Oh, yeah. CNN does it a lot? Not CNN. CNN did this one. Yeah. The FBI kind of added some problems to this, too. What did they say? They said they were unclear on whether he was actually shot, pierced by a bullet. Or a fragmented portion of one. Oh, so it could have been a ricochet. A shrapnel, yeah. Yeah, because I know there was something that got hit.

There was a video that I saw of a railing that got hit. So it might have been a piece of the bullet that hit his ear. But also, how are we not seeing this kid's social media? Right. Also, did you read the story about the examination of his house? That it was completely scrubbed? There was no silverware. It was like spotless. Like a team went over it and scrubbed it. Oh, wow. Okay. Yeah.

Also, did you hear the story about how someone using ad tracking, so they can find out where you're going just based on ad tracking, and they found that someone from a building near the FBI offices was regularly visiting this kid.

Oh, seriously? Yeah, find that, Jamie. I just got the video about the house. I'm trying to see it. We also don't even know how many of the Las Vegas... We'll go to the video of the house first, and then we'll go to... But also, just as a sidebar, we don't know... MKUltra was a real thing. To think they don't do that anymore. Oh, come on. I believe we had people that participated in that...

securing of it there were bomb assets that we provided mr chairman can i have 30 more seconds yeah yeah i'm letting everybody count okay on the night of since then none did you get any reports from any of your agents of anything fishy at the home i was briefed on uh was there any silverware found in the home or trash i i have no nothing in the briefing that i was given

I guess maybe he's reporting on that report then. Yeah, he must be reporting on that report. So that's not... That's a very incomplete video. Remember the Las Vegas shooter? Yeah. That's a weird one too. They just completely forgot. Just stop talking about it. There's a lot of those that you go, what the fuck is that? What is that? Why'd they do that? The fact that we're talking about January 6th for years and this is just like, eh. Yeah. Yeah.

Well, January 6th was a lot of people. But this is a presidential candidate. Come on. Oh, it's all fucked, man. It's fucked. It's weird. The whole thing is weird. This kid had these devices and remote controls for detonators, like very sophisticated stuff. He had three...

overseas bank accounts, encrypted accounts. Wait, is that true? Yeah. That I didn't know. Yeah, find that out. Three encrypted accounts, I believe, I read. Why? Again, this is stuff I read. I hear you, but the point is, this should be what CNN and Fox lead with every night. Oh, yeah. Like, this should be the scandal. Right. This should be like, what is this? Remember OJ? We knew about Judge, what was his name? What was the judge's name? Alito? Yeah, we knew about Judge Alito's sneakers. Like, every detail of that trial was obsessed. But here, it's just like, eh.

Right. Well, we still don't know what's on the Epstein client list. Or was it 80 congresspeople had sexual harassment suits that are under seal? How about the 51 intelligence, former intelligence agents that signed off that the Hunter Biden laptop was bullshit? And zero consequences for any of them. Zero.

The bank account thing might not have been real. They might have backtracked on that. Oh, did they? It just says it might have been linked to an online gaming site or something that might have been a fake account. Oh, so why he has accounts? I'm trying to understand. Okay, see what you get. So it's hard to know what's true and what's not true, and it's hard to know what's bullshit and what's not bullshit. But what we definitely know is that they knew about this kid in advance.

That he had a rangefinder. They saw him walking around with a rangefinder. That somehow or another he got up onto that fucking roof. That they knew he was on that roof. And that they saw him with a rifle and didn't shoot him. Yeah. And he got off three shots before they shot him. I heard he took horse paste. No way. Son of a bitch. What a lunatic. Oh, he's definitely a right winger.

Interesting. Maybe he's a never-Trumper. But he was registered for the Republican Party, which doesn't mean anything. But he donated to some... Biden. Yeah, left the thing. He donated to Biden, I believe. The whole thing is really squirrely, and it just makes you wonder. What about that whole sloped roof bullshit? That's wild. What the fuck are you talking about? It's too dangerous to be on that sloped roof. Meanwhile, they had snipers on another roof that was sloped.

Even if not, it's like figured out. It's the president. Yeah, I mean, they had that kid. They were looking at him. They saw what he was doing. Here's the thing, though. Okay, I got to put this out there. What? He's going back to Butler to give another rally at the same place. Yeah. It'd be really funny if, you know, at this point, it's kind of like when she's asking for it. You know what I mean?

If they get him again the same spot like come on this time they use a drone Yeah, the kid had iron sights on his rifle. What's that was interesting? He did not have a scope so iron sights are you're lining it up like this? Oh, yeah. Yeah, okay. I think you said iron sights Okay, yeah sights so he didn't have a scope, but it wasn't a long shot It was like 150 yards and if he went center mass instead of a headshot. He probably would have killed him I mean, I don't know if Trump wears a bulletproof vest

That's a good question. Yeah, that's a good question. Probably at this point, hopefully he does. Hopefully he does. But if that guy just shot center mass, he'd hit him. He would have hit him. I mean, you're dealing with a variance of this or variance of this, right? And Trump's a big dude. If the bullet did nick his ear, it might have been a piece of shrapnel. Who knows? But it definitely shot someone behind him and killed him. Killed that one guy. It was a firefighter. Did you see Joanne Reed?

What'd she say? Biden survived COVID, so it's basically kind of like the same. Yeah, they're so gas lit up, they don't even know what the fuck they're saying. They don't even know how ridiculous it is. And Jen Psaki's there nodding like, uh-huh. Oh, yeah. It's the same thing. Basically the same thing. Because she knows better, so she's just like, oh, shit, I got to kind of play ball. Yeah. Joy reads a gem. How does she have a worse hairline than Joe Biden? How is that fucking possible?

The whole fucking online pundit thing is so strange. Or excuse me, on television pundit thing is so strange. What way? Well, it's just like it's so clear it's contrived. It's so obviously contrived. Joe, it's not obvious.

When we were in the 80s, when Hacksaw Jim Duggan got arrested with the Iron Sheik, people were like, what? He's not actually from Iran and he's not a terrorist? Like, that was a moment. Don't you remember? Yes, I do remember that. So for a lot of people, or they'll tell you, you don't know that this celebrity takes steroids to gain 60 pounds in three months for this movie. Maybe he's just got great genetics. And it's just like, guys. But that's how people think. Yeah. What's on their screen is they think their screen is a window. Right. Yeah.

And they've been infantilized over decades of this bullshit being pumped into their face. It's so funny how few people even know what MKUltra was. That the government really did try to make assassins and try to... They tried to add all this to their own people. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Try to model all kinds of people. I've said this, I think, on this show before. You can go after the president, the Republicans, the Democrats, the universities, journalists, whatever you want. Only when you question CIA, you're a crazy person. Everything else is fine. It's on the table. CIA, oh, you must be a crazy person. You must be. Yeah, you must be. They're looking out for your best interests. And even if you told them Google MKUltra or Mockingbird and they look it up themselves, it still won't permeate. Well, they'll say that was then. Yeah. Yeah.

They don't do that anymore. That was the 60s. People were just, there's a lot of oversight now. There's racism. Yes. A lot of racism. Yeah. There's oversight now. You can't do that anymore. It's insane. You don't have to worry about it. Yeah. I mean, that's when people want to talk about what the deep state is. That's the deep state. The people that can pull the strings that aren't elected officials. J. Edgar Hoover. Yeah. Yeah.

He was more powerful. Who was he accountable to? Nobody. Did he really wear dresses and shit? That's bullshit. Bullshit, right? That's one of those things that they put out there. This is bullshit. They did it to get to him. Yeah. This was after he died. It came out. Supposedly. But you would think that someone's always going after someone's secrets and want to have a few secrets of his own.

Well, yeah, I'm sure he has some. Especially back then. I'm sure he had some secrets. So that was the ultimate one, that he really is a cross-dresser. Which is a good thing you didn't put him on hormones, right? Or maybe it's a bad thing. Maybe it's a bad thing. Maybe he would have calmed himself down. He would be a lot nicer. Maybe. Yeah. Maybe. Or maybe he would have got hysterical. Got down to hysterical. Like Nixon bitch slapping him in the Oval Office. Maybe we should start really using some of that information that he has. I want to make a plea. Okay.

To the president, because I know he doesn't. Which one? Biden? Joe Biden. I know he doesn't listen to this show, but I know his staff does. So Donald Trump at the Libertarian Convention a couple months ago promised to free Ross Ulbricht if he gets elected. Did he really? Yes. Interesting. He made this commitment. Wow. So I'm saying to the Biden administration now, you can make a fool out of Trump.

You can take this issue off the table. It's probably going to be the margin in New Hampshire. There's a lot of people who are Ross supporters in tech circles. You can free Ross Ulbricht today. You got Julian Assange out of jail with a lot of institutional opposition. No one has institutional opposition to Ross. Yep.

He's not killed anyone, not been accused of killing anyone. He's doing double life, even though he's not a violent criminal. There's no concern of recidivism. So, Mr. President, make an asshole out of Trump. You can say Republicans promise, Democrats deliver, and you could free Ross Ulbricht today. Commute his sentence. There's a lot of weirdness in that case, too, right? Yes, there is. There's a lot of weirdness in terms of entrapment. Yes, and he's been – it's as if he killed a bunch of people that have double life. It's crazy. Right, right.

So this is something that would be very easy for him to do and get a lot of people to support or at least stay home and not support Trump. And every vote counts. Silk Road was a way that you could buy pretty much anything, right? It was like a black market website. Yeah. You could buy pretty much anything. It's like torrenting but with drugs and weapons or whatever it was. And weren't there murders for hire and stuff too? I think there were, yeah. Yeah. He's not been accused of that or charged with it certainly. Wasn't that one of the things that he had –

signed off on someone getting assassinated? That's one of these rumors, and that's not what they charged him with at all. No? And it's like, if that was a thing, why are you charging him with that? What did they charge him with? I don't even remember. What was it, Jamie? It was some bullshit.

Albrecht was charged with engaging in a continuing criminal enterprise narcotics conspiracy, conspiracy to commit money laundering, conspiracy to commit computer hacking. On August 21st, 2014, a superseding indictment added three additional charges. On February 4th, 2015, Albrecht was convicted on all counts after a jury trial that had taken place on January 15th, 2015.

Double life plus 40 years without the possibility of parole. Two life sentences plus 40 years. Nine years he's been in jail now. So just in case science comes along and they can keep him alive forever. He's also ordered to pay about $183 million in restitution based on the total sales of illegal drugs and counterfeit IDs through Silk Road. Wow. That's crazy. So even if he gets out, he's got to pay $183 million in restitution? I don't know if he has to do that. Holy fuck. Yeah.

They dropped it. Federal prosecutors allege that Albright had paid $730,000 in a murder-for-hire deals targeting at least five people, allegedly because they threatened to reveal the Silk Road enterprise. Prosecutors believe no contracted killing actually occurred. And he was not charged. Albright was not charged in his trial in New York federal court with murder-for-hire, but evidence was introduced...

At trial supporting the allegations, the district court found a preponderance of the evidence that Albright did commission the murders. So it seems like he did commission them. The evidence that Albright, according to them, had commissioned the murders was considered by the judge in sentencing Albright to life and was a factor in the Second Circuit's decision to uphold the sentence.

He wasn't charged with it. Right. He's been there. It's crazy, though, that they don't charge him with it, but yet they use it as a consideration. That is kind of crazy. That is crazy. Are you allowed to do that? Apparently. If you have the evidence for that, put it up and let him be tried for it. And I got to tell you, I don't think that's going to get you double life in any other case. And isn't he like a yoga teacher now? He teaches people how to read. Yeah. He's like a model prisoner. Yeah. He fucked up.

Let him out. You know, this idea of like you want to have total freedom and we're going to just circumvent the system and do it online. They just wanted to squash that and put as much water on that fire as humanly possible. And the point's been made. Yeah. So he's served his time. Mr. President, please let him out right now. Why do you have the Hellraiser box on the table? Oh, I wanted to give me, and this is from Cabin in the Woods. You ever see Cabin in the Woods? The movie? Yeah. That's Fornicus' orb. Oh.

Oh, that's a fun movie. I have these normally in my bedroom, obviously. Oh, so you put them here for your vibe? Yeah. Oh, no. Really? Yeah, yeah. That's so bizarre. Is it? Why do you have the Hellraiser box? Because it goes well with the orb. Is it functional, the Hellraiser box? No, but this one is. Does it move around? Oh, it is. This is functional. What does that do? Here. Careful, though. Okay. It's not cheap. What does it do? Oh, it moves around. Yeah. And does it open? Careful, careful. You don't want to open a door. Oh, really? How does this work?

You're just doing it. You just spin it around? Yeah, and then doorways open. Oh, doorways. We don't need that. We don't need that here, yeah. Imagine if some wild shit goes down, like fucking Malice and Rogan, they opened up the doorway. I think it would be like a fucking Malice. They knew. Opened up the fucking door. Yeah, the Hellraiser box. Yeah. It's clearly satanic. Lament configuration. That's it? That's the orb. Oh, wow. And it's like a conjuring type deal? Well, he was the Lord of, what, bondage and pain from the movie? He's a Cenobite, obviously, yeah.

Cabin in the Woods was a fun fucking movie. I love that movie. It was a fun movie. That's Josh Whedon. Was it really? Yeah. It was like a love letter to horror movies. Ah, it was a good movie. Sigourney Weaver was excellent. I don't want to spoil it, but Sigourney Weaver's in it and she's superb. It's also, it really straddles the line between silly and actually scary. It does really well. It's like,

It's a movie for the fans. Yeah. Like you watch, you're like, okay, this guy's talking to me through the screen. Right, right. Yeah, it's like you have to love horror movies to really love that movie. Because there's so many Easter eggs. You've got to sit down and be like, who's this? Who's that? Like, oh, he's a Cenobite. That's what that reference is. Werewolves. Yeah. Yeah, fun-ass movie. Yeah, I love that. So that's why you brought these things? I just want to have a good vibe, yeah. So you always have that in front of you when you work? No, it's in my bedroom. Oh, okay. Right where you sleep?

That's where I sleep. Where you rest your head, you put that on the one side. Is that how you do it? They're on the nightstand. The same nightstand or on opposite of the nightstand? The same nightstand. Is that the one you stare at before you close your eyes? I don't... What do you stare at? When you say your spells. My spells.

And that's how I laugh. And then I go to sleep. Well, there's so many people online. Because everyone's so skeptical and because conspiracies are so fun, everyone thinks that everything is satanic. Yes. You know, everything. Like, that was what people thought about the Prince Charles painting or King Charles. I like the King Charles painting. I'm like, someone's fucking with him. Like, that guy's like, that's a subtle dig on the history of the UK empire. It looked like it was something on a hot topic. It looks crazy. Yeah. Yeah.

But like people try to find like Baphomet in there. If you're, you know, turn it upside down. You know how you know the guy was fucking with him? Because he left his sausage fingers in there. You know how he's got really fucked up hands? He does? Jamie, pull up King Charles' hands. It's insane. Oh, they're like inflamed. They're like sausage. It's like in that movie with everything everywhere all at once. Oh, wow. Yeah, yeah. He's probably got a disease, man. Yeah, you think? Jesus Christ, that's so inflamed. Yeah. God, that's so unhealthy. Yeah.

What's wrong with his hands? I don't know. Oh, sausage fingers. Let's scroll up so you get a look at that. They didn't even show it. They just show a picture of him. Let's see the hands. That looks fairly okay. A little swollen. What causes swollen hands? Caused by a variety of things. It's important to discuss symptoms with your doctor. Yeah.

Does it show his hands down there? Yeah, there you go. Okay, right there. That looks crazy. That looks crazy. That looks like you're never getting that ring off, first of all. I feel bad for Camilla. They can't feel nice. Ew.

Do you think they still do it? Of course, don't you? They're all perverts. You think so? The royal family? Are they all perverts? They're all perverts. Really? Of course. There's such a thing with aristocracy. That's why they're not having sex with kids because they like it. They're having sex with kids because they can.

The aristocracy has extra kids that we just said Prince Philip was on that was that Philip no no it's the other one Andrew he was on he was buddies with Epstein We've got all the receipts and then when they caught him he goes well. I don't sweat anymore I don't sweat and yeah, he said I was at the Falklands and I caught something and now I don't sweat anymore So there you go look this up Jamie. I'm not making this a man. That was his excuse Some weird thing about like the story can't be true because I don't sweat yeah, I

Huh. One of the Duke of York's claims in his Newsnight interview was that he cannot physically sweat. Let's find out, bro. Let's put that bitch in a sauna and see if he's a liar.

Yeah, so there you go. Virginia Guffrey. Just arrived dancing with you and you're profusely sweating and then she went on to have a bath possibly. Prince Andrew replies, there's a slight problem with the sweating because I have a peculiar medical condition which I don't sweat or I didn't sweat at the time and that was... But can you get the clip of him saying this because it sounds so crazy with his words. Didn't sweat at the time because I had suffered what I would describe as an overdose of adrenaline in the Falklands War when I was shot at. Oh, that's a good way to...

Divert that's crazy you you you are around you have to guys what time is there? It's their adrenaline's through the roof because they're like in a life-and-death situation Yeah, they all sweat this isn't a thing right, but there is a medical condition where you don't the guy who does that Sculpture out there that the sea monster. Yeah, he saw he can't sweat. Oh

It's really bad. He was in the Falklands? No, no, no. He just has a real condition. Yeah, but that's a thing. But that's not something you develop. Well, I don't know if you can develop it. You can't develop it getting shot at, Joe. Because what, Trump can't sweat anymore? I mean, maybe it just rarely happens when someone blows a fuse. I'm not a doctor. I'm not an apologist for this sweaty motherfucker. I think he's sweating right now.

It's so simple to find out if this is true, though. Let's get—interesting that you say that, sir. We have a sauna at 195 degrees. Or we just turn up the air in the— According to this doctor in this article, he says. Okay. A physician, Dr. James Hambin, wrote in The Atlantic at the time, in case the dubious claim—the dubiousness of this claim is not already evident from its context—nested in a sea of dubious claims, this is a dubious claim. Yeah.

Okay, there are people who cannot sweat or who sweat very little. Such a propensity to appear cool and collected while everyone else is flushed and damp has been attributed to the inevitably...

inviolably high status throughout history. I'm sorry, I'm reading it while I'm thinking. But the medical condition of not producing sweat, okay, this is the stuff that my friend has. Androsis, yeah. Androsis. Extremely undesirable. The function is vitally important, a way to cool the body down. McVader, the guy who does all the Kill Tony and Mothership stuff, he has that too. So two guys I know, both guys named Scott.

Oddly enough Scott who made the incredible artwork and Scott the mcvader who does other incredible artwork both of the guys like legitimately can't sweat and

but they didn't. You can't develop it. And certainly not from adrenaline. It's a thing. It's a genetic thing. Like some people can't feel pain, which is really bad. It's not a temporary condition, such as Hamblin concludes, a temporary inability to sweat would defy medical precedent. Okay. So it's bullshit. It's bullshit. Pure bullshit. Yes. He just wanted to make that as a nice, like, look, by the way, I got shot at at the Falkland War. I couldn't have raped that girl. I was shot in the war. I don't sweat. Yeah. I also don't believe he was shot at.

Probably wasn't. They're not going to put the prince in the line of fire in the Falklands. Maybe he's like that dude from NBC. Brian. Yeah, Williams. Yeah. What about Hillary? Yeah, she was one too. She's almost on a sniper fire. Yeah, the first lady's going to be on a sniper fire. Yeah, okay. Yeah, that was a weird one, right? Yes. Weird?

Yeah, the first lady's going to Bosnia. They're just going to let people take shots at her. Well, they did it to Trump, so maybe they did it to her. Saying you can't sweat is so crazy because they could find out so easy if you sweat. Like, it's not like a difficult thing. Well, sir, did you mind sitting in this sauna?

But it's also like maybe she got, let's pretend, let's just take it at face value. She could have gotten that aspect of the story wrong. It doesn't mean you weren't there with her. It's like she misremembered that you were sweating. She just think you stunk. Oh, there you go. She said she misspoke. And last week she gave a dramatic description of her arrival in Bosnia 12 years ago. We're counting a landing under sniper fire. And she had to duck and run. Okay. Yeah.

She says, "So if I misspoke, that was just a misstatement." That means a lot. I say a lot of things, millions of words a day. So if I misspoke, that was just a misstatement. So if I make an incantation that summons Beelzebub and he rises from a crack in the earth, that was just a misstatement. I say millions of words a day. If you put a million chimpanzees for a million years, typewriters, they'll make the works of Shakespeare. Why would Beelzebub come from a crack in the earth? You know he's a lord of the sky.

I remember landing under sniper fire. There was supposed to be some kind of greeting ceremony at the airport, but instead we ran with our heads down to get into vehicles to get to our base. And there is footage of her landing and they're giving her flowers and it's kids. It's not like it wasn't on video. Both Clintons held their heads up and did not appear rushed.

So the video. Oh yeah, presented her with a poem, yeah. There you go. Eight-year-old Bosnian girl presented her with a poem and later greeting U.S. troops. So it's just... She... You believe that thing about all the monkeys? You leave them alone with the typewriter? For a million years they compose all the works of Shakespeare? Yeah, that's mathematically definite, but what do you mean here? I don't believe it. What do you mean? I think it's going to be all fucked up. But if you do it long enough, infinitely, every... Who's going to edit that?

You'd have to find all the works of Shakespeare. Joe Rogan, you don't edit Shakespeare. You'd have to find all those words in those monkeys. There's no way they're going to write those letters in that order. If it's infinite, yes. Infinite. Right. That's the whole point. I think infinitely, it sucks infinitely. I think unless they evolve, if it's infinite and then the monkeys grow up to become humans and they figure out how to write like Shakespeare. If you're hitting keys at random, eventually you're going to write out Shakespeare's parts. Perfectly. Yes. Just a time thing. Yes. Yeah. It'll take trillions of years. Right. But one day. Right. Right.

The end, period. Imagine. So imagine like our proof of intelligent life is just proof of infinity. Like, oh my God, we found an incredible book, like a guidebook for human beings. It's really just a bunch of space monkeys pounding on a typewriter for fucking billions of years. And a book is called The Art of the Deal.

It's like one space monkey figures out paper, and then the other space monkey finds a typewriter that an alien civilization has dropped off there, just sort of like they do with us with spaceships. When they just crash land, they just drop them off a typewriter. I just read a story of this monkey who was in a zoo, a chimp, for like 50 years. It just finally died. It was really sad. But I read the story, and they said, well, it was originally being raised by someone in their house, and then they took it to the zoo. And it's just like...

And they bought it at a pet store in New York. Oh, my God. Like a chimp? Yeah, I used to be able to do that. Remember the lady in Connecticut? Yeah, that's what I was thinking about. I'm like, who thinks this is a good idea? Yeah, there's a lot of nutty people out there that don't understand what a chimpanzee is. There was a piece recently, Jamie, where they were studying old videos of chimpanzees. And they believe that some chimpanzees are capable of human words.

See if you can find that. This is like a very new discovery. So they were examining some older videos and they believe that some chimpanzees, here, old videos of chimpanzees suggest they are capable of speech.

So these are some old videos that they had done. So a small team of speech specialists and psychologists in Sweden, the UK, and Switzerland has found via study of old videos that at least three chimpanzees had learned to speak human words, suggesting that the animals are capable of learning this ability given the right circumstances. The work is published in the journal Scientific Reports. Isn't that wild? Huh. So some of them know how to say some words. Papa or cup. Mama, papa, or cup.

But their work was discredited over the years as unethical because the chimp was taken from its natural mother. In this new effort, the research team wondered if dismissal of these findings was done in absence of attempts to duplicate their efforts. To find out that might have been the case, they searched for the video evidence of such attempts at training and found three videos showing evidence that chimpanzees can be taught to speak human words in a rudimentary way. I'm scared to hear this. It's going to be so terrible. Let's hear it.

Can you say mama? Mama? Mama. Is this for mama? Mama. You love your mama? Mama. You love mama? Mama. Here, sweetie. This is for you. But that's just a grunt. That's for you, my love. No, I'm saying mama, dude. Yeah, but it doesn't know what that means. You're a good boy, John. Well, let's see it say other things. It says cup. That sounded like... It sounded like mama, but it doesn't mean the... You're a good boy, John. I love you. Love you, Johnny. Do you like that? Is that good? Yes.

You could teach huskies to say "I love you too"

I guess. How are you going to teach me to say that noise, mama? The chimp doesn't think that the owner is its mother. Right. It doesn't understand what that means. It's just saying that. Yeah, absolutely. Right, right, right. So even if you speak, it's saying the noise. Right, right, right. It doesn't understand what it's saying. That is different. So they know that they can teach gorillas sign language though, right? Right. But the interesting thing about, I think with that, that might be overblown because my understanding is the gorillas never ask questions. Right.

Right. So it's always a response to a cue. And gorillas are extremely intelligent. It's not a dispute, but like, what are they actually, are they mimicking? Knowing gets them what they want. Cause I know that the, what's the most famous one? Coco called it's, it was mad one. Supposedly she, he was Coco boy.

Male, let's well, that's a kindergarten teacher decide Our next president and I mean yes and Coco called her like a dirty toilet devil Whoa, and I'm like a gorilla doesn't know what a devil is you can't teach a gorilla the concept of devil That's not a word right right? Yeah, that's ridiculous. That is interesting So maybe they don't know how to express themselves, but they can crudely interact with ideas

So it's not as simple as – maybe they don't even have a sense of self to the point where they can express themselves. Like I'm hungry. I'm very tired right now. I'm tired of doing these tricks for you. I don't like this. I don't want to be in this cage anymore. The other thing that really blew my mind is they had a thing where they taught dogs –

There's two pictures. Is it a boy? Sometimes she used the sign for devil as an insult. She also named a parent Devil Tooth after initially being frightened of it. In the famous joke, The Aristocrats told by Coco the Gorilla, Coco says Devil Ingrid. It was a girl, okay. Coco was a gorilla who mastered sign language and raised kittens. She died at the age of 46. Aww. It's but...

But you can't teach the concept of devil to an animal. That's not a thing. Imagine just being trapped in a fucking building that's run by gorillas. And they tell you what to do. And they give you bananas. And they try to get you to grunt at them. And you're like, oh, my God. Is there any fucking people around here? How bad would that suck? Well, that's how bad it sucked for Coco. No, it didn't. Because dogs think of us as the same thing as them. How do you know that Coco does? Maybe Coco would have been way more happy with a bunch of gorillas.

Maybe. I would think so. Probably. Dogs are happy with dogs. Dogs are happy with people. They're a little happier with people. Dogs want to be around people, yes. So there was an experiment they ran, and I still don't understand what's going on in the dog's head, where they put up two pictures, and the dogs were trained. If you see a picture of a dog, you hit this left, or if you pick dogs on the right, hit the right, and you get a treat. So they had some concept of dog training.

Because it would be like the whole dog or the dog's head or whatever. So if you have two pictures, like the shape of a cat and the shape of a dog or a cow, they're the same shape. But the dog's new to choose dog.

Dogs look very different from each other right so that was something I thought really fast well dogs know what a dog is versus like Marshall hate squirrels tries to kill squirrel sure but when he sees Carl right absolutely even though Carl squirrel size the Carl is a dog well Carl's bigger than a squirrel a lot when he's little he wasn't okay and he knew how big was Carl when Marshall first saw him five pounds but that's good that could be a squirrel that could be a smell thing

I think it probably is. That's gotta be a smell. The dogs do not smell the same as rodents. It's probably also the way the dog interacts with another dog. And the motion, the way they move. Yeah, there's a difference. The rodents probably smell delicious. But visually, how is it gonna know that that's a dog on the screen? How's it gonna know that Marshall's never seen a French bulldog? How the fuck did he know? But from smell. Right.

Right, but I mean he's probably like what is this? This is a crazy thing. He knows little thing knows little dog He does yeah, that's true my older daughter has a Chihuahua So he's he's like been around little dogs But they know that like they know that there's a difference between all kind like I had to teach him that he can't kill chickens It's like chickens are in the fucking you know. What are these things doing? Yeah, they are pets

I still don't trust him totally, but he doesn't chase after them and go out. But when he first saw him, he wanted a snap. I'm like, hey, no, no, no, no. These are our friends.

Like he's like, what the fuck are you talking about? That was in Call of the Wild too. Was it? Yeah. Like the dog killed the chickens and the owners don't do that. And the dog was safe around them. But at that point, it just showed how smart the dog was. You can teach dogs to not do that. Yeah, of course. They just have to know that you'll be very upset with them if they do it. And they get it in their head and they go, okay, I got it. It's not just that they're upset. They know in group versus out group. So they know to be a guardian, like there's something I protect. There's something I eat. Yes. It's a part of the family. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, and he doesn't even know. Like, bro, you get eggs. These are awesome. Eggs are good for you. Don't kill them. Stupid. For short-term gratification, I went to the bathroom once, and I had just gotten home and opened the door, let him outside, and I took a leak. And then as I closed the bathroom door and flushed, he had a squirrel in his mouth. I was like, dude. Alive?

Not anymore. Okay. But he just got it. Well, sometimes the dogs will bring you like a living thing that they caught. They're just mouthing it like birds or whatever. He's a hunting. I mean, he's a golden retriever. But are they really hunting? Yeah. They're bird hunting dogs. Retrievers. That's what retrievers are for. I thought they retrieve it after you've killed it. Yes. Yeah. I mean, you use them in hunting to retrieve. Okay. But they go after the animals too. Like if the animal's wounded or whatever, they'll go after it. Got it. Got it. Okay. But they want to bring it to you.

Oh, yeah. So it was like, his instinct was to bring this fucking, I opened up the bathroom door and he's standing there with a squirrel on his mouth. Proud of himself. Yeah. He got lunch. Oh.

I don't know what to tell him. I mean, you can't bring it back to life. I'm not going to discourage him from this activity. Did you let him eat it? No. They do react to videos, though, which wouldn't be smell. Because I've seen Carl even, like, watch a lot of that stuff on YouTube, and he started fucking freaking out. Yeah. It's like, what the fuck did he see? Yeah, if you bark in this room, Carl will go crazy. Is that true? Yeah, we won't do it. But I could do a really good dog. It sounds like I'd get a low growl.

And Carl will like pop up. I don't want to do it.

Because if I do it, he will go bananas. I was having so much fun with him waiting for it. He's the best. I love Frenchies. I love them so much. He fucking throws himself at you, too. I know. He almost got my chin. He leaps through the air to try to bite you. He's such a little character. They're only bred to be fun. Yeah. So if a dog could talk, they'd probably be annoying. Like, ooh. No, give me food. Give me food. Give me food. Give me food. Do you want to go play with the ball? Not right now, dude. I'm working. How about now? Yeah. Yeah.

And they think your whole day is spent going hunting for dog food. Exactly. They think you leave to get dog food. That's what they think you're doing all day. Well, you kind of do. In a way. It's not all day, but in a way. You have to go fund that stuff.

But it is weird that our thoughts of intelligence are based on communication. I wonder if we could decide. So they think they're going to be able to do that with AI. It's one of the more interesting things about AI. They think they're going to be able to decipher dolphin languages. Because right now, we know they talk. We know they have accents. We know they have dialects. We don't know what they're saying. Wouldn't it be funny if they're really racist against the killer whales? There was a bit on that, like the Chappelle show. Really? Yeah, about a dolphin that was racist. Wasn't it a Chappelle show?

It was one of the sketch shows. But, I mean, what are they saying? Well, they're also really horny. Oh, they're not just horny. They kill babies so that they make sure the woman keeps breeding. Lions do that, too. So the women fuck as many as the male dolphins as they can just so that they're protected. Because it might be my kid. Who knows? Let's not kill the kid.

Yeah. Female lions do that too? Males. Males. And male cats. Oh, yeah, they kill. Yeah, they kill the kittens, yeah. Yeah, but the female lions don't fuck as many males as they can, right? But dolphins do that because intellectually the dolphin realizes, oh, I fucked her, that could be my baby. Wait, no, no. I think female cats can have more than one parent in their litter. Right. Yeah, I think so too. Yeah. Yeah, this is a...

It's so interesting. Like, I would wonder if in the absence of human beings, like imagine if something came, some magical switch got popped and human beings disappeared from the face of the earth. I wonder how long it would take for an equally intelligent animal to emerge, if ever.

Oh, that's because we haven't been around that long. That's really not this smart. It's been what, like 50,000 years, if that? Well, they push it back a little more now. And then there's also some new humans they're discovering, like the Denisovans, which I don't think they even discovered them until somewhere in the 2000s. And

You know, we don't even have the full fossil record of human species. If you find something 10 years ago and it's a new kind of human, which the Denisovans are. Right. Like, who fucking knows how long we really go back. But I think they think we go back in this form roughly a couple hundred thousand years. Right. That's nothing. It's a blink of an eye. And then the Neanderthals, they lived a lot longer. They were around for like half a million. Were they smarter than us?

Not necessarily. We don't know. We know they're a lot stronger than us. And they ate primarily meat. And they were like much more rugged. I thought people who have higher Neanderthal DNA tend to be more intelligent. Yeah, I don't know if that's true. It's interesting. I don't know if that's why either because sometimes hybrids... Hybrid vigor, yep. Yeah, hybrid vigor. That's the term for it. That could be something along those lines. Or it could be like...

Maybe the ones that interbred with Neanderthals like had to become much more intelligent in order to overcome them. Like we would just assume that Neanderthals were brutal.

Humans were brutal then too. Exactly. Humans were brutal. And Neanderthals, like apparently they went after big game and they made weapons and tools. A lot of them had broken bones and they had much more dense bone structure than ours, which only makes sense that they were brutal if they were doing that. So they're probably ruthless in every regard. And we probably had to kill them off.

And we probably merged with them in some sort of a way, too. But they think the merging was almost all Neanderthal males and Homo sapien females. Okay. They think that's... Because isn't, like, virtually everyone have a big chunk of Neanderthal DNA? Not everyone. Mostly white European people have it. Oh, okay. Yeah. Africans generally don't. Oh, okay. Yeah. It's...

It's just interesting that all these different kinds of human existed along with like that Hobbit man. I was just going to say, yeah. Didn't they find out that he was actually just like a dwarf? No, that was some speculation by some haters. The Hobbit haters? Some anthropology haters. Like, you didn't discover this. This is bullshit. Something gets shot. I think it's pretty much been established because of the amount of bones that they found. This is a very specific animal.

Okay, and they think that this very spit also. There's a legend of these things and I think it is Vietnam They call him the orang pendek and that this small hairy man has been there's been a legend forever I thought that was supposed to be what the orangutan was based because the orangutan was found fairly recently It wasn't like the 1840 something crazy. I think gorillas were found in 1900. Yes, there's something something um That's interesting. I think the orang pendek though is an actual little tiny person. I

little tiny hairy man but i think orangutan means hairy man of the forest interesting i think so maybe they're related maybe it's just like the etymology of the words yeah who knows but that that little creature that little hairy creature had been talked about forever and everybody thought it was just but everyone has like elves and dwarves yeah you think dragons are real i had this big argument with my friend jesse not that long ago because it is whenever here's the thing when you have

Every culture on Earth having the same kind of myth. It's like there's got to be some starting point. Like something's popped this off. Right. Yeah. And Forrest Galante, who's an actual biologist who studies wildlife, and he actually – he's done a lot of work trying to find the Tasmanian tiger, the thylacine. Oh, the thylacine. Yes. They're over in Australia trying to find that guy. They're trying to claw him again. I think he's somewhere else. I think they're in New Guinea or somewhere looking for –

live versions of it, but whatever. He thinks it might be a real... There's a whole YouTube video of him describing it on this show that he thinks dragons were a real thing. It's possible. He obviously doesn't mean flying giant lizards. Some large lizard creature. Some large, you know, probably terrifying predator that existed. Maybe a hold... Look, we have crocodiles, right? No, we have crocodile dragons, yeah. Or a holdover. And I was watching this video. I'm getting this guy on the podcast soon.

But his video was about sightings in the 1800s of crocodiles in the Congo that might have been as many as 50 feet long. Yeah, but those measurements are so easy to kind of exact, especially if you're scared something's chasing you. Sure, but they measured it up to the boat that they were on.

Okay. And there's been a few of them. Like one of them they saw that thing was about 40 feet. They know they found them. I think the biggest one they ever found was like 28 feet. It makes sense that those things, especially back then. Yeah. Look at the size of that fucker. This is the drawing of what it looked like. Yeah. Cause don't crocodiles keep growing their whole lives? Their whole life. Yeah. And they live forever. Yeah. They live forever.

So they had one that died of asphyxiation. He died in captivity. And I think he was 28 years long, or excuse me, 28 feet long. But what would a dragon, how would it be a dragon? Like, there's no question there were giant reptiles and they still are on Earth. So what is a dragon going to literally mean? It's not going to have wings, right? Who knows? I mean, pterodactyls had wings. It probably doesn't breathe fire. No, that doesn't make any sense. Right. But...

If you thought about the history of large reptiles on this planet. Look at the anaconda. Yeah. That's no joke. That'll kill you in two seconds. Paul Rosalie told me he was in the Congo, or in the Amazon, rather, and he wrapped his arms around them, and he couldn't get his hands touching. Yeah. He's like my size. He couldn't get his arms around it. Think of how big that is, man. That's so insane. Right. He couldn't touch his hands around a snake. Right. Right.

And we know that the megafauna have been driven to extinction, so things used to be bigger. Yeah. There's also some sightings in the Congo back in the, I think the 1700s or the 1800s of enormous snakes. Snakes are like 100 feet long, like huge snakes. Isn't there a photograph that someone took of an enormous snake, an old photograph out of an airplane? And they also just recently made forest elephants their own thing.

Forest elephants are different. Yeah, they're new species. They recategorize them as a new species now and pygmy hippos Oh, yeah, people didn't think they were real like this hippo doesn't live in the water So this is the photo oh shit, but it's hard to figure out scale. This is from what is it from? It's a fake. Oh, he says it's a fake. No, it's a fake It's a crop photo of an anaconda probably one close to 14 16 feet long maybe 200 pounds So this is someone answered it. Oh, so it's one of those

Perspective things. Like, also like the Loch Ness Monster, that famous photo that turned out to be horseshit and everybody shared it forever. So this is an old grainy photograph from 1950. So that's a fake. Yeah, it looks kind of fake now that I'm looking at it. It looks kind of shitty. I mean, it looks real, but we don't know the perspective. But no, the lines look too clean. The lines around it, like it's too defined. I see what you're saying. The bottom of it, it's like way too defined. Like the snakes, the outline of it looks like someone drew it, like it's a tattoo. Yeah.

It doesn't look like an act like the the ground underneath it Why would it have like shadows like that? But what else this thing is like the the colossal squid which is like the biggest invertebrate was only discovered in like the 70s The largest spider was only discovered like 1981. Well some of those squids those giant squids They didn't get photographic evidence of them until fairly recently. Yeah, cuz they leave leave live deep sperm whales eat them See that nutty one that looks like a crab that they found underneath one of those. It's like a new species

that they found under a oil rig.

What do you mean? They have this deep, deep camera under an oil rig and this fucking thing, look at this. Oh, that's a mega, oh God, what's it called? Look at its fucking length. It's a squid. Look at its like crab-like tentacles. And they have the elbows, they don't know what they're for. Megapenna, it's called. Look at that fucking thing, man. There's better footage of them. I mean, that is an alien. If that was on another planet, if there was a planet that was filled with only water and we found that, we'd be freaking out. Like, we found alien life. Yeah. It looks like an alien. It is, yeah.

And they don't know why the fins are so big. Yeah, there it is, Megapenna. The wildest thing to me is octopus.

Octopi are so bizarre. They're not like anything else. They can change their texture and their color to exactly match what's below them. You know, they put them on like a cuttlefish, too. They put them on like a checkerboard to see what happens. Yeah, and they freak out. It doesn't really work. Do you see they have robot cuttlefish now, and the male cuttlefish try to fuck them? Whoa. Of course they did. And then they change gender.

The male cuttlefish are the little sneaky, like, male feminists. There's two. Cuttlefish. There's the alphas and then the ones who pass as female. Yeah. And gets them on the side. Yeah, little male feminists. Yes. They sneak in. Yes. They sneak into the women's room. Yeah, it's like Matt Iglesias. Yeah. Those thugs.

He's one of these shit lips on the internet who's like, oh, Biden's not really dementia. It's just the footage. It's like, okay, buddy. Shit lips are awesome. Are they? Yeah. How? They're fun. You should only take their opinion if you can go up a giant hill with them. Why? To push them off? No. See when you get tired and when you quit. Oh, yeah. What do you have? How much is your opinion worthwhile or how much are you just a weak person?

Not just weak physically, weak of spirit, weak of will. What about a hike? That's the real toxic masculinity. It's these types with the glasses and the bad hair line. Oh, it's very toxic because it's the kind of masculinity that attacks stronger masculinity by default. There's no objective analysis of anything that's strong. There's no acknowledgments of certain merits and there's no looking at any positive. It's only negative. Yes. It's negative.

Which gives rise to guys like Andrew Tate.

Yeah. Fuck you. They just stick it in your face. Suck my dick. This was a lot of reasons people vote for Trump. It was just like, oh, I can't vote for him. Well, fuck you. I am. Now what? Yeah. Yeah. And what? This is the fear that people have of a lot of this, you know, overreach the government has in schools and all these different things. It's going to give rise to like a very hardcore conservative uprising. It's not even I would call it right wing, not conservative. Yeah. It's not conservative. Yeah. Radical right wing. Right.

That's the fear is that things always go like that. If you go so far left, things are going to go so far right to overcorrect. There's going to be a movement. We've known this since...

time immemorial. If you tell kids you're not allowed to smoke, it's like, oh, now I get to smoke and be a badass. You can't have a drink. I get to drink and be a badass. You tell them you can't have these ideas, they're like, oh yeah, watch me. Now what? Right, exactly. And it's radicalizing a lot of young people, which I think is wonderful, frankly. Well, it's fascinating because out of rebellion comes some of the coolest shit sometimes. Out of rebellion comes some of the coolest ideas, the coolest music. Real rebellion resonates with you.

It's just sad when you watch those dudes who used to be rebels. They get old and then they just fucking become conformists. And tell you to go get vaccinated. Yeah, those guys. Yeah. So sad. Real punk is going to do what Pfizer says. So sad. When you get old, though, you get scared. All these kids are going to catch that disease and I'm going to die. You know who the worst one of this is? Who? Stern. Stern.

I don't know anyone who's fallen as hard as Howard Stern. He was like my guy. He believes all those things he's saying, which is crazy. You think so? Yeah, he believes all the vaccine stuff. Oh, that he believes. He believes all those things. That you're a fool to not do it. You shouldn't be a part of society. It's unfortunate.

Because it's like I don't know who he's talking to or what conversations he has or what he knows. And I'm not saying that I'm an expert in any way, shape, or form. But I was very lucky that I had access to a lot of people. So you're no Sanjay Gupta. I'm no Sanjay Gupta. I had access to a lot of people that explained things to me in a way that I'm like, oh. Oh, well, I thought, nope. Oh. So how do they get that information? What? Yeah. That's the rules? And the more you know about that stuff, the more you're going to question these things.

Everything in our society, if there's a narrative, I guarantee you someone's making money off that narrative, whether it's green energy or whether it's pro-vaccine or whatever it is. It's a money thing. It's not a public health thing. They're not really concerned about climate change. They want to make sure that you're concerned about climate change so you vote and so that they can get these fucking things through and they can get more and more control over you. I had Dr. Drew on my show and –

a big moment for him because he's not a Jill Biden doctor, he's a real doctor. When COVID was hitting, he was asking very basic medical questions because there was this instant certainty

And randos were yelling at him on Twitter. And he's like, I went to medical school. I'm not a tinfoil hat jackass. I'm like, this is just basic medical 101 stuff. And I'm not even saying they're wrong. I'm saying, how did you get to this conclusion? Are we certain this is the best approach? And the blowback... People already forgot how insane that blowback was and how censorious the regime was in terms of...

you know, just even just, and here's the thing. If there's an emergency, like let's suppose there's an asteroid hitting the earth, let's brainstorm. Yeah.

Yeah. Like let's, okay, what's going to work. Let's try this. Let's try that. Like we got, we got an emergency. We're not going to know right away. What's going to be the best solution. But the way they were acting was like, no, no, no. This is the only way. And I don't care if you have a negative vaccine test, you need to have a negative COVID test. You need to have a vaccine vaccination passed. That's a year old to get into this restaurant. Makes no sense. The whole thing was very strange. It must've been surreal for you being like the, one of the targets. Oh yeah. It was very weird. It was,

It was also so weird because the thing that they were targeting me on was so dumb. I listed a list of things. We all watched it. And they all went after this one thing. I'm like, boy, that seems odd. Here's the way they went. You remember how they went after it. They went after it as if Joe Rogan goes to Petco, right? And you wore like a Dave Smith disguise so no one recognized you. And you grabbed the horse pace and you just injected yourself.

Injected is hilarious too. But that's kind of like what the impression was where it's like worst case scenario, your quack doctor told you to do this, right? Worst case scenario. But what's really crazy is that they did it with that particular drug. Right. Knowing the history of that drug, the fact that the guy won a Nobel Prize on it for humans, knowing the fact that it had been given to billions, billions of prescriptions had been filled. And here's the thing. If they cared about being honest and saving lives, there would have been consequences.

And there were no consequences for any of these people other than you clowning Sandra Gupta in this chair. Well, there also should be an understanding of why a person got through it easy and why some people don't. Right? Yeah. Because I'm not that young. I got to ask you. I got to ask you. I got to ask you. Okay. Let's get our tinfoil, more tinfoil hats. Do you think Biden really had COVID last week, two weeks ago? It made him grow. If you get it when you're 81, you grow. It's called Grovid. Grovid.

Maybe I gotta get a, hey, maybe we should get some of that shit. I wish, I know, we could use it. I don't know, I don't know what to believe anymore. I don't. It's so hard when you saw the letter that was written, it didn't have the presidential seal on it. Right, and it wasn't his signature. No.

So there's that, and then there's no video of him saying that until far later. Why would they even test him for it? Like, if he had symptoms, like, you would think it's the flu. Let's treat him like the flu. It's a good thing to say. Say he's got COVID. Like, oh, well, shut it down. But he wasn't wearing a mask. Shut it down. And this idea of COVID where you can't go on screen? Shut it down. He's got the COVID. He's going to give it to you through the screen. Well, also, it's like...

If you're 81, you get COVID. It's not looking so good for you. I don't care if you're the president or somebody else. It's a bad scene. I read something again. Reddit might not be real, but they had given him 10 doses of Paxlovid. And then one of my friends who's a doctor was like, that is way more than you're supposed to give someone. Why would they give him that? Find out if that's true. Because that might have just been some... Here's the thing.

We're dealing with so much misinformation, so many trolls, so much bullshit. It's so hard. Six dose of Paxlovid on Saturday. And according to his doctor, he's improving steadily. Biden, 81, tested positive for COVID-19 while campaigning in Las Vegas on Wednesday. He self-isolated his home in Delaware by receiving the oral antiviral pill. How many are you supposed to take of those? Six doses.

That seems like a little. What is the side effects of Pax Lovin? Does it have any side effects? It turns your wife into a selfish, silly, entitled cunt. Only according to your son. The rest of my favorite video was when after the debate, you answered all the questions. I know. You did great, Joe. He's just standing there like he's gone. We've all seen a guy like that. If you live long enough and you have grandparents or you have friends' grandparents, you're going to see someone like that.

This is the end. And when she's talking to him and like she's got power for the first time. Yes, that's what I was saying. She's doing talking at like speeches and stuff. She's up there talking. It was like misery. She was Kathy Bates. She's like, I've got you in my house. You're staying here. Here's the other thing that's funny. How badly do you have to fuck up a debate to lose your house and your job? Like that is, I think, historically unprecedented. How do you lose his house? He's getting kicked out of the White House. Oh, yeah.

He's allowed to be there to the end, right? Allegedly. This tall guy. They're not renewing the lease. Once he got taller, I think he's going to change things. Yeah? Yeah, because on these new drugs, he's going to say, listen, guys, give me another chance at this. This stuff that made me grow six inches. I fucking got it, man. Not only do I got it, I think I'm better than I've ever been before. You know, I sent away for this drug that would grow me by six inches, and it was a fraud.

I'm still at four. Well, you can get those things done where they break your leg and stretch you out. There was a guy called... What was his name? He deleted his Instagram. He was like this power lifter. Oh, I saw that guy. Yeah. Did he delete it? Yeah. Probably got tired of people shitting on him. Yeah, it was...

He was a giant guy already. Yeah, he was like, what, 280, 6'2"? Yeah, and he wanted to be 6'8". And he thought he was small. So he got his legs... That's by dysmorphia. And he was away from his family for like a year. Oh my God. Got my knees done. Was that his handle, I think? Yes, yes, yes, yes. Yeah, that's crazy. There's a lot of people that have done that. They've

They've got their legs and even their arms. They've got their arms lengthened. Well, if you're going to get the legs, otherwise you look like a penguin, right? You look weird. Unless you were a dude with like crazy long arms. Isn't it the thing where you can't ever walk? You can't run anymore. No, we thought that too, but you can. There was a guy that Jamie found that got it done. Okay. And he shows the difference. And then you see him sprinting. And that man's name is Joe Biden. It's so quick. He grew six inches in a week. This new one they have is just way better. It's just a pill. Yeah.

It's Pax Lovett. Six toes to six inches. Imagine if it cures COVID, but you grow an inch. Guys would be like, oh, I got COVID. The Joe Rogan Experience sponsored by Pax Lovett. It'll get you taller. Forget that horse face. At the end of the fucking five seasons from now, my head's scraping on the ceiling. I'll become a freak.

Like that guy, that famous guy from the, you know that guy from the 1970s that was like a beautiful, handsome man, and then he kept injecting stuff into his face? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Hold on. I'll send it, because I sent it to Tom Segura. Me and Tom Segura send each other the most horrific shit that we can find. I get boomer memes from you. Yeah, those are fun. They are fun. Boomer memes are fun. I'm sitting here like, Joe Rogan's just texting me a boomer meme. It's so fun. If I can get a smile on Michael Malice's face. It works. I'm serious. It's so funny.

I got to find this dude. I send Tommy so much shit. We send each other so much shit. Our feed is just a gross disaster. Oh, this is the old Tom. Hold on. He's got a new phone number. The one of the best texts I ever got, I got a text from Roseanne. It said WTF with two question marks. And I thought, okay, she's a boomer. She sees something on her screen. She thinks I could see it too. And I'm like, what do you mean? She goes, you don't call me. Like, what's going on with you? I'm worried. It was so sweet. All right, here it is, Jamie. I'll send it to you.

I don't know what the fuck this guy was doing. I guess this is all... Why is this not... I just had a Jamie. So this is what he... Well, I want you to see the whole thing. Okay. Because it starts out in 1969. He's a gorgeous man. Like, beautiful, handsome man. And then over time, Homeboy goes crazy. Go full screen so we can see, like... Oh, okay.

So, 19 days, beautiful, handsome man. Now it starts getting a little weird in '88. But I think that's just age. That's '91, that's just age. Just age. Now, things start getting weird. Oh no, this is the beginning, man. Oh, I know this guy. 2004. Now it gets crazy. Look at the chin. Something's going nutty. Now the cheeks. Look, he's trying to avoid the wrinkles, so he's turning his face into a fucking balloon. And I guess it's just body dysmorphia. Now, 2010.

But it gets real crazy. Now he's done his lips. 2013, it starts getting real crazy. Look at that, 2015. I mean, now it's just nuts. Now it looks like you got attacked by a swarm of bees. That's gotta be a wig or something. Something. Look at that. I mean, Jesus Christ. And it gets worse. So the head keeps getting bigger. Look at 2019. I mean, that's just absolutely insane. Now, look at it. Now, if that guy just let himself age, he would just be an old, good-looking guy.

But instead, he went nutty because that's body dysmorphia where people can't see what they look like. Yeah, I had my dysmorphia. I got not facially but body and it's gone away. Do you know what stopped it? I'm not even kidding. I've talked to you about this a little bit. A few things did it but this was like the moment where I was like, okay, this is done. I was at Gold's.

And there was a young dude there, early 20s, I'd say, who had striated delts. And I was like, wow, that's so cool. And then my brain said to myself, I swear to God, this is how I go. You were just at the Tesla factory, right?

Two in the morning with Joe Rogan Elon Musk and Jordan Peterson and you go tell that kid that you think you're jealous of his striated delts and he will look at you like you're a crazy person and That was when it clicked like holy shit. This is fucking insane. No one cares about your fucking striated delts except your girlfriend No, they don't care. You don't think so? They don't fucking care. No, they think it's gross. Really? Yes girls you banging

They don't like that bodybuilder build at all. What do they like? When we were at... Chris Helmsworth? When we were... Finlay or Fat Over... Do you know what else it was? When we were at the Mothership opening night, this guy came in, and I've met him since. I don't remember his name. He was a bodybuilder, like, in his 50s. The chillest dude. Really nice, very friendly, no attitude. I'm sure you know who I'm talking about. Again, I don't remember his name. His name is Chris, maybe. Immediately, everyone in the room...

is like this guy's out group outsider it wasn't like this guy's cool it was like he's not one of us and i saw the energy change i'm like holy if this was something people thought was awesome everyone be treating him very differently well it depends on the group of course it depends on the group but these are this was the normal people don't look at they look at that as freakish not as admirable like when girls have those huge implants at a certain point it's not hot it's just like

There's something wrong with right you went crazy. You went crazy. Yeah, and that's what happened that guy's yes, you went crazy Yeah, but isn't interesting that there's something wrong with us where we can't see what we really look like We can't we can't perspective. This was very difficult to acquire when you were in the middle of that When you mental illness when you realize like holy shit, my brain is lying to itself. It's very scary Oh, it must be when you look in the mirror and you see your face. You're like, oh my god him. I don't know. What does he see?

Who knows, man? And I think once you've got to that point, like, what are you going to do? You're going to get it removed? Well, then it becomes your thing, right? Well, I don't know. You're that guy. Oh, God damn. Because I could have just got a facelift, buddy. Yeah. Get fucking crazy. What's her name? They're twins. So you were seeing maybe both of them during that. Oh, yeah. Well, they both do it. They both have the same thing. They both have the same issue. What about Matt Gaetz?

It was Matt Gaetz. The congressman. Oh, yeah. He did his eyebrows. Not just... He got something with the cheek, too. Oh, did he? Yes. Whoopsies. Yeah, you can't do that if you're a public person and all of a sudden your eyebrows are like... And a dude. A 45-year-old housewife from... Yeah. Yeah.

He looked like a real housewife. Yeah, like Miami? Yeah. He's got a frozen forehead? No, but the cheek implants and I don't know if it was implants. Oh, it was fillers. Yeah, it was fillers. It was implants or fillers. It was something nuts. Isn't that crazy too that for a politician, like your wrinkles and the weathered look on your face is actually good for your career? No, it isn't. You don't think so? No. Oh, I think so. I think if you look at a guy like RFK, the voice is a problem.

But the way he looks, the fact that he's this intelligent, worldly guy that's seen a lot, had a lot of life. You don't want a smooth-faced dude. Yeah, that's crazy. That is literally crazy. That's cheekbone stuff. Come on. Yeah, that's – I think it's – And that nose, too, looks – Well, it's hard to tell because it's a different angle. But there's definitely something – That's not a natural nose, and I should know. You might be right. Yeah.

Wow. But the forehead and the eyebrows are crazy. Okay, maybe the nose is natural from that angle. I could be wrong. But that is a crazy look. That's a crazy look. But the thing is, he used to be the chubby kid. So I'm sure in his head, he's still always going to be that chubby slob kid. Even though, Matt, you looked fine before. Yeah. Yeah.

But it's again with these Biden bills, it wasn't going to get bigger. They're never happy with, like, dude, you hit 240. You're just like, you're fine. You know how we could save society? By electing Kamala Harris as president. Yes. And then have a reality show where all the congresspeople have cameras that follow them and get to know the real them. Oh, God. Well, that's called Veep. See them in their house.

Except that's not a reality show. Julia Louis-Dreyfus blocked me because she was saying, go ahead and vote. And I go, you won five Emmys for showing that politicians are all sociopaths. Blocked. She blocked you? Yeah, but I don't blame her, but it's true. It is true. But you don't blame her that she blocked you? I don't blame her. Really? I block people very liberally. Do you? Yeah, I don't hear it. You just block people? Yes, of course. Fuck them.

Well, I'm not there to be annoyed. Right. They can disagree with me. That's fine. But if you're going to be playing gotcha games, I don't hear it. Blocked. Blocked. That's Lex. Lex is a blocking fool. Lex, he's worse than me. All my people are like, can you get Lex to unblock me? I'm like, yeah. He just wants positive interactions only.

Which is fine. I mean, but it's not the internet. I mean, but I guess you could cultivate a place where you only have positive influences. Or you could have negative in the sense of respectful. Right. Or negative in like... Right. Or like, the thing is with the internet, whenever there's a question mark, it instantly becomes like an improv show. And like,

as any improv show, it's just torture. It's just like, these are not funny. Like everyone says the same stupid lines. It's rough. And don't get me started on the boomers. My God. What do you mean by a question mark? Like if I say, is it just me or is it blah, blah, blah? Or like, why is my body at my age still making you farts? And the things that they reply, some of them are going to be very funny because it's farts, but some of them was just going to be like, oh my God.

Just relax. And so I avoid question marks as much as possible. Well, there's a lot of very angry people out there in the world. Yeah, no shit. And they love to express themselves in this very strange way on social media. It's a strange way to interact with people. And they love it. I do. Like if I go to someone's feed and all their comments are just hostility, you suck, fuck you, you've got to block those people. You don't want that energy around you. Yeah, you don't want it. And it's not...

I don't know how many of those people are even real people. There's a few of those people. I think there's a lot of real people like that. Come on. 100%. But there's also, anytime there's a politically charged issue or a person who's engaging in politically charged issues like you do, you're going to have a bunch of bots.

That are attacking you and a bunch of bots on your page and a bunch of people that aren't real people There's a lot of them. I'm sure you're aware I thought that that was nonsense and it's not and I've seen enough receipts that it's like holy shit This really is a thing well You know that FBI guy the former FBI analyst who said that it's he estimated it somewhere in the neighborhood of 80% of all accounts on Twitter or bots 80 80 8 0

Holy crap. Yeah, I don't know if he's right, but I know that they wouldn't supply Elon with the information necessary for him to find out whether or not it's more than five, which is what they were claiming. They were claiming somewhere in the neighborhood. But he said that they based that on like 100 accounts, like a random 100 accounts. Oh, okay. So that's too small of a sample size. But 80 is still a huge amount. FBI agent confirms Elon Musk's claim of undercounting bot accounts on Twitter by conducting his own research. So his estimation was 80%, I believe.

Was it say where it says it? Yeah, right there. Right at the top, Jamie. Oh, here it goes. Uh, when I consider the volume of velocity of automation we're seeing today, the sophistication of bots that a given set of incentives is likely to attract and the relative lack of countermeasures I saw in my own research, I can only come to one conclusion. All likelihood, more than 80% of Twitter accounts are actually bots. This of course is my opinion. But I mean, uh,

There are bots where like if you reply something all the replies will be like, oh check out Bitcoin blah blah blah. Sure. But then there's also those more sophisticated bots. Yeah. Where like if you're going to go after Trump or go after Biden they're going to swarm you and be like actually blah blah blah blah. Yeah, 100%. And I bet all the candidates use them. I mean I bet it's just I bet it's legal right now. I mean I don't know. I mean it was essentially propaganda, right? But they have bots made out of meat. You have people like Brooklyn Dad and

was a kid had a assistant. They're bots. Right, essentially. What's that girl, JoJo, whatever her name is? So how does that work? Are those people paid? Yes. Who pays them? It's either DNC or the campaigns. We have the receipts for these people. By the way, it's not at all just the Democrats. There's Republican operatives as well. Let's make that very clear. Oh, 100%. I have a friend who,

has a Republican Instagram page and he reached out to me to tell me that people were contacting him asking him to do videos and that if he did those videos they'd pay him money. It was like thousands of dollars. I want that. Like give me that goo. You can get that goo. I'm for sale. Oh good. Yes. That's good to know because I've been talking to some people and I was going to breach this with you but I'm glad you brought it up on your own. Perfect. Well how much do you charge to lie? Oh lying I do for free. It costs money for me to tell the truth. But

But propaganda, if you want to be a bot. Like who would you be a bot for? The libertarians? God. No? Anarchy? Who would I be a bot for? Chaos. You know who I'd be a bot for? Who?

Betterman I kind of like him. I love him. I like him now. I used to think why is not gonna need this campaign? I just think why is that guy put a suit on then I realized why don't I put a suit on? You know, I have this fucking huge podcast and I wear hoodies. He wears hoodies his whole point is my people I shouldn't be taken seriously just because I'm a senator and I got to tell you for me to say something positive politician takes a lot the barriers so low for someone to go on public record and talk about his mental health problems and

That could help a lot of people. And I thought it was very commendable of him to do that. Also, watching him bounce back from his stroke. I know. I thought the dude was toast. Yes, we all did. Right? Because when you stumble with words that bad and you struggle with thinking that bad, but it was just post-stroke. But then here we are. What is it like? At least two years later? Yeah. Two years after stroke? 2022, yeah. Yeah.

Seems fine and reasonable. And like saying a lot of stuff that he's like, I'm a progressive. This is not what I stand for. No, he said I'm not a progressive anymore. Right. He used to be. He used to be what a progressive, what he thought of a progressive. Yeah, he was the first one to tell Menendez to resign. And now Menendez is resigning from his own party. So I love him. By the way, Senator Fetterman, if you want to join with me and do a remake of Twins, I'm totally down. Do you think that guy would ever run for president? I hope so.

See, he's a reasonable, like, actual left-wing person. He'd win in two seconds. He's reasonable. He's a moderate. Right, but would they ever let a guy like that even get close? Like, would they Tulsi Gabbard him?

Well, Tulsi was only a congresswoman from Hawaii. She didn't have a big base. She ran against Bernie. She wasn't a governor. Right. Bernie was her guy, and she ran against Tim Adelson with Warren, so they're splitting that base three ways. I think he'd have a great shot, don't you? I do. I do now. But getting past the primary would be tough because the machine wouldn't like him because he's not reliable. Biden was reliable. He's a party hack. And he would do speeches with a hoodie on.

Yeah. This guy is outrageous. Is it outrageous? No. His whole point is we work for you. Yes. No, no. He's very reasonable. I'm shocked because I used to make fun of him.

I used to think, like, this is so crazy that this guy can't talk and he's going to run for governor. And then he won. I was like, oh, well, that's – but he won against Dr. Oz. Who's the worst? Well, you know, the guy got brought up in front of Congress for making fake weight loss claims. You don't go from supporting Jussie Smollett to being a Trump supporter. Right. You're a complete phony and a clown. And what was even funnier was when Oprah came out and twisted the knife and endorsed Fetterman at the last minute. Did you remember that? Oh.

And he was her boy. Oh, wow. Yeah. Interesting. Oprah did that? Oh, yes, she did. Fetterman now, I wonder how many people that endorsed him back then will endorse him now that he's like outside of the... I don't think he got many endorsements. But I mean, how many people that were like okay with him?

Or still, you know, if he's speaking the way he's speaking and talking about these issues. You know what? What could make it happen? What? If Trump wins again, there's going to be a lot of soul searching in the Democratic Party about, OK, where we lose track that we're losing to who they perceive as this complete putz.

And that would be an opportunity for someone like Fetterman, like it was for Clinton in 92, to be like, OK, I'm going to steer this party back to where middle America is. And we could win on that those terms. If they were going to do that, wouldn't they have done that after Trump's first term? And instead they ran with Biden. Well, they could have. They didn't do that for Trump's first term because, first of all, Hillary got millions more votes. Second of all, they were too busy losing their minds to think strategically. This would be a little different. I mean, after after. So but after they ran with Biden.

There was plenty of like young, enthusiastic people they could have ran with. Yeah, but I think Biden for them, you knew he was safe. He's a safe Democratic vote. You know what he's going to say. He's going to play the party game. And he's kind of tried and tested. Also, he knows how Washington works. It's kind of like one of those things where it's hard to hate him. It's my term. It's my time. It's hard to hate him because he's just this sad old man in a basement. It's going to be a lot. It was a lot easier. I don't think it would have been as easy to put over Klobuchar or Buttigieg.

They certainly don't want Sanders because he'd be a loose cannon. Yeah, they didn't want Sanders at all costs. But I don't believe Buttigieg would work either. He says a lot of salad. He talks a lot of words salad. He's a kid. You don't go from South Bend to Preston. First of all, here's another reason why I think she's in trouble, Officer Harris. Buttigieg raised more money than her.

Yeah, but don't you think they're all just going to get behind her? No, no, I do. But my point is how if you in when you're running for president in 2020 can't raise as much money as a senator from California. Right. As the mayor of South Bend, Indiana, your Rolodex is not good. Right. But that is just trying to get through the primaries. Sure. But they weaseled her in there. Right.

Right. Shoehorned her right in, which was always the fear when Biden was elected president. Yeah. But hey, if anything happens to him, look, I don't think it's a given that the people are going to write the checks for her that they would have done for him. Is it said and done that she's going to be the candidate for president? No, it's not. She has enough delegates as of right now. Harris raised $200 million. Now, do you know how that works, though? Here's what's interesting about that. Do you know what astroturfing is?

Yes, of course. Yeah. So explain to people how they do that. Well, there's different ways to do AstroTurfing. But one of the things they do is they attribute donations to people that didn't really donate them. But it's not only that. It's that there's no question that a lot of these donors, thanks to James Carville, who was a Democratic strategist for many, many years, James Carville said, hold your donations if Biden's a nominee. That's the only pressure you have. And they did. The donations trickled to a zero. And that's one of the reasons Pelosi and the others freaked out. Right.

Once they switch, they're ready to write those checks again. The question is, it's July. Are you going to be able to sustain this fundraising through November? And I don't know that she will. Really? Because she didn't last time. Okay. One more thing. There's no question that whoever is the nominee of either party is going to get a fuck ton of money. That's not in dispute. The question is, is she going to be as...

As good as a Hillary who had the Rolodex, the favors. It's my turn. She had Wall Street. Body count. She had what? Wall Street. She had Hollywood. She had D.C. She had everybody. Right. Kamala Harris. No one likes her. That's a big difference. But then people don't like Trump either. So that's a big problem for him. So how could it work that they would get rid of her? How would that possibly happen?

You mean publicly or privately? All of the above because it seems like – Well, privately you'd have to be black. You'd have to sit her down and be like, here's what's going to happen. If you don't drop down yourself, then we're going to do X, Y, and Z. But she's already said she's running. Yeah, but she could – I mean who knows what they got on her. Did you not see the phone call she had with the Obamas? It was amazing. It was so candid. It definitely wasn't planned at all.

Yeah. Just they happen to have a camera on her while she got a phone call from the Obamas. It was beautiful. I am surprised how quickly they flipped the candidate without any pretense of having some kind of competition. Well, I think they were feeling like they couldn't win. Right. But the point is, I'm shocked that they went immediately with her as plan B. Because she is the one that is in the administration now, which means all the people that have jobs keep their jobs.

So they're all very motivated. That's not what that means. Doesn't? No. Well, she could get rid of some of them. That's what happened when Lyndon Johnson took over, when George Bush took over for Reagan. They clean house. They bring in the wrong guys, of course. You think she would do that? Are you kidding? She would make it look like a Benetton ad. She's the nominee from Netflix.

Like she's going to make it all, you know, DEI. Who could possibly take over? Like how would they do that? They would have had to have forced her not to declare, which would have been a very tough move. Because if she's not the nominee now, here's my 4D chess. Okay. 4D chess. 4D chess. With Michael Malice. Biden is like, all right, we put her up. We know she's going to lose.

She can't go back to the she's not gonna be governor of California. She's not gonna be senator. Her career is done. And that was his kind of legacy, like, you know, getting rid of her once and for all, because otherwise she's going to be the nominee or a very strong case for it in twenty twenty eight. Right. But don't you think that if she runs in twenty twenty four, that's very likely there's a possibility like more than fifty fifty that she wins? I don't think it's more than fifty fifty. Oh, interesting. I do. I don't think it's more than fifty fifty. I think there's so many people that are opposed to the idea of Trump. That's true. Quiet.

They're not like the Trump people are loud, like the in support of Trump. They go to the rallies. They get they fill up stadiums. And so people in their head, they go, oh, he's more popular. But the people that are not willing to vote for him, they're on the quiet tip. And they're there. They might talk amongst their friends and they might talk at work and they might. But they're not going to these rallies. She didn't even make Iowa last time.

the last time so we got us three months of her this is a woman who cracks herself up because she sees a school bus and goes the wheels and the bus go around and round you know you didn't just fall off a coconut tree do you know that yeah her mom says that kamala you did not just fall back you exist in the context of yeah so i think this is going to be again and here's the other thing how is it you're going up for that debate

And when Tulsi hits you with your record, you don't have a counterpunch ready. That makes no sense. She didn't have to. She knew they were going to bury it. But they didn't bury it. It ruined her campaign. It ruined her career. It ruined her campaign. I think at the time she thought they were going to bury it. Well, yeah. They weren't going to bring it up. I mean, there was a lot of people that were very high on her. They thought she was going to be the one. That's true. Yeah. And they were wrong.

But maybe they're right now. But they thought that about Biden, too. Remember? Back in the day, we got busted for plagiarism in 88. He was never the guy. But he was running for president in 1988. I mean, Delaware? But again, just like they took her out, they took him out. Right. He came back and became president. Yeah, like what, 20 years later? Yeah, but this time has accelerated. Yeah.

40 years is four years now. Plus, she's got the experience, international experience, of being the vice president of the United States. And never the border czar. That never happened. That never happened. You're crazy. Despite the fact that people say she was the border czar, newly appointed border czar. No, the Republicans made that up and had a time machine. It's a cheap fake. Those are cheap fakes. Yeah.

It's just such a wild time. And most people don't even... The average person that's going about their job and occasionally watching the news and occasionally paying attention to the news feed on their phone, they have no idea what's going on, how nutty it all is. Yes. But the...

But until they do, it's like gradually and then suddenly. Yeah. Like with the Biden debate. If the corporate comedians had done like Colbert and Jimmy Kimmel and all the other stewards, other bastard children had done their job and made fun of Biden for four years about being an old fart, that debate wouldn't have landed as hard as it did. The fact that it was a complete 180 for what we were being told is what really did him in.

So the more they're trying to hype her up now, and of course she's the new nominee. She's the greatest thing that's ever happened. She's basically another Oprah. Once she starts opening her mouth, and here's the thing I predict. She's notoriously difficult to work for. The New York Times, New York Post covered this at the time. Wait until people who are trying to get her into the White House start leaking to the press. What a nightmare she is to work with.

That is going to undermine a lot of stuff for her too. She's not like Hillary. Everyone's, Linda, what was her name? Linda Bloodworth went to jail for Hillary. People ride or die with her. Kamala is a different story. Well, she had a really high turnover of her staff. 90%. That's great. What's normal? I don't know, but it's not 90 in like a year. Yeah.

It's not just that they left. It's that they left and went to the press and be like, I can't. She doesn't do her homework. And then she yells at me for not being prepared. Like they went leaked. People leave these offices all the time, but they don't leak. But it's just so wild that the media is all behind her now. Why is it wild?

Because it's interesting. It's just wild to see. The 180? Yeah. The shamelessness? It's wild to see. Yeah, but what's even wilder is seeing it through Twitter. Yeah. Because you see their 180 switch and then people are like, you guys were just saying something different two weeks ago. Yeah. It's hilarious. Thank you, Elon, again. Yeah. Oh, my God. Thank you, Elon. Because if it wasn't for him, first of all, he changes the watermark for all the other ones. The things that all the other social media companies would have blocked you for, more stuff is slipping through the cracks now. Right.

Less people are getting banned, I think, in these other social media networks because it highlights. And in their defense, broadly speaking, what's the point of me banning this person if they're going to be in these other nine sites or one other site? It's not actually accomplishing the purpose. It's just a waste of time. And I'm alienating potential subscribers or whatever.

Yeah, it's wild, man. It's a strange, strange time. Again, it's like the Coliseum people. But do you know what's even funnier? What happened? Is that blue-pilled people on the left have been told and believe that Trump is scared to debate her. Yeah, that's funny. They think this. You really think they think that? Yes. No, they don't have thoughts, but that's what they say. They think that because she's young? Yeah.

No, because she's a prosecutor and she's tough. Yeah, tough. Hashtag girl boss. Yeah. And she's a prosecutor and he's a crook. So she's going to put him in his place and everyone will clap. That's going to be interesting if they do debate. They're going to do debate. Several. If he lives. Yeah. Do you think they're going to try to take him out again? Yes. Yeah, I do too.

Yes. If they did that, this is not the only time they're going to do that. And then also that one was so Lee Harvey Oswald. It was so it was so perfect. Lone gunman at a certain take him out. If you're that sloppy, you're in on it.

Someone had at least know that he was under threat and done a piss poor job. They didn't care. Yeah. That's the thing. I don't think that literally they worked with this Crooks kid at all. You don't think so? I don't think so. What about the data that shows that someone from the, near the FBI office in DC was visiting this kid back and forth? Being on their radar screen is not the same as like colluding with him. Meeting with him. Right. I don't know that them checking him out is the same thing as he's working for. Why would they check him out?

Maybe who knows why there's lots of reasons check somebody out point B working for the government right now. Yes, obviously Do you already get paid a massage? Yeah, I get paid my shot Yes, you did. I gave you the briefcase. I didn't know I didn't know but I was scared Point being if you I think they just don't didn't care Right and if it's your job to protect someone's life and you don't really care right at a certain point something's gonna happen Mmm, the whole thing was very strange

It's just very strange. It's kids. It's also. Past and. It's also. Blackwater commercial. Yeah. And also the idea that, again, the media is like, whatever. Yeah. It's fine. Yeah. Well, it's also the news cycle today. It's so rapid. It's like working on an assembly line. Like, you don't have time to check parts. You got to put that fucker on. There's another one coming. They were talking about the debate for weeks. Mm hmm.

True. And they were not talking about this like they were talking about the debate. Do you think that they set him up? They knew that Biden was compromised and they let him debate on purpose? No. Because they could have said no debate. No, because I think, first of all, I think, again, he's fine in the State of the Union. He probably has good days and bad days. And even the bad days are probably exceptionally bad. And I think he has his people. I'm the president, Jill Biden. Who's going to tell Jill no? I think at a certain point you believe you're on bullshit, don't you? Could be.

Yeah. I always wondered because it was so early, though. But in their head, we're going to put a nail in the Trump coffin once and for all. The guys, Hitler and a liar and all this other nonsense that they believe. So Joe's going to come out there. He was, listen, look at his debate history. Paul Ryan, who was no dummy, he was very good against him. He was very good against Sarah Palin in 08. He was awesome.

good against Trump in 2020, like they're just going to nuke him. That's what they thought, I think. Interesting. I don't think so. You think Jill set him up to fail? No, no. I think she's probably delusional like that guy with the shit in his face. She's delusional. She is. Yes. But I think the people behind the scenes knew exactly what was going to happen.

Don't think that was I think if they had a debate again, it's not 100% that it would be that bad again That's interesting because again look at the State of Union like sometimes he's bad, but not that bad But I think right but the State of the Union was not live and yes, it was no No, do you see that they found out that it wasn't that they looked at his watch and his watch? No, yeah

Do State of the Union analysis Biden's watch. No way. Yeah, someone zoomed in on his watch and his watch was the wrong time. How could that even be? Well, it could be he's blind and you can't see what time his fucking watch is. But all the networks on it? I don't know what they knew. How do you know what they knew? You just, you get a feed, you know? I don't think all the Republicans would agree to it too. Who knows what they knew?

They're all there live while he's doing it? Yeah. You've got Mike Johnson behind you. You've got the audience crossing their hands when they don't like what you say. It's got to be live. Let's see. I don't see anything. State of the Union wasn't live. I added watch. It could be some troll shit. They got me. Yeah. They could have got me. There was no Biden's watch thing.

Look at Biden's watch incorrect time State of the Union. He has never watches a sundial the guys like he's looking at the stars No president by does a little off stress wasn't pre-recorded a fake Yeah, there's a fake image they got me these sons of bitches it's just amazing how much stuff is fake I

floating around. Say it again. Yeah, it's not the State of the Union. Wasn't? No, that was just him talking after, whatever, when after he hadn't been seen for a few days. Well, that I believe could have been pre-recorded. That wouldn't make a big deal one way or another. Like, if you're giving a talk and you have something to say, you take eight takes. Oh, so they used the wrong image from a different thing. These cocksuckers.

It's just like that stuff. Like who's doing that stuff and why are they doing that stuff? Why are they having people talk about that and share inaccurate information? I think it's to put everything into chaos so that you have no idea what's true or what's not true. And then...

Ultimately you you don't know what to trust or what not to trust which is a great way to get things through because then Preposterous things can happen you like what fucking happen and then you could honestly say there's a lot of misinformation So we gotta crack down on it right and they could probably putting up some of that misinformation themselves what they would do some stuff That's easily provable what they would do in Eastern Germany the Stasi they would infiltrate like some group and

Right. With a Stasi agent. And that Stasi agent be like, we should go with other government. And everyone else would be like, you're crazy. We don't want that. And they get arrested for colluding with someone who wants to go with the government. Oh, my God. He's part of your group. Yeah. Well, look, the Gretchen Whitmer. That one's nuts. 12 people were FBI agents out of the 14 that were going to kidnap her. But they still act as if it really happened. Oh, it's so nuts, man.

It's so nuts. It even says there's pictures of his watch with the correct time on it that were taken inside the Oval Office. Yeah, these cocksuckers, they got me. But I also don't think why would that be a big deal if it was pre-recorded? Do you know what I mean? If he's just giving a talk. Well, the idea is that if he's pretending to be live but really can't be trusted because he's so gone that they could edit it this way. I don't believe for a second he had a cold. So you think they just pulled a coup, essentially? I don't think the coup is because of COVID or the cold. No, it's just he couldn't win. It was...

Why would I... Okay, one thing that I think everyone, most people would understand is these politicians are power-hungry people, right? Why would I, as president, step down when I do have still a decent shot of being Trump again, and I beat him last time, got him out of the Oval Office? Especially when Mises has the ring. Right. Mises doesn't want to let the ring go. Right. So, yeah, of course there was a coup. Mises can choose the debates. Right.

Right? Am I wrong, though? Mises is so good at debating. Mises was number one in his class. Number one. Right. Mises has a higher IQ than you. Don't you think they had to go to threats? Yeah, I wonder. What else would get him out of there?

I mean, maybe they just talked sensibly to him. Said, look, you're going to kill the whole party because you don't want to step down. Do you remember when Chuck Schumer told Dianne Feinstein she's got to resign and she agreed and then forgot that they had the conversation? He had to talk to her three times. Well, at the end, like she was having people behind her tell her what. Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah.

That was nuts. They were wheeling her around. Yeah. It's like, you ever see that video of the lady in Brazil who brings a dead guy to the bank? No. She's just like holding his hand. Trying to get him to sign the money over to her. You never seen that? No. Holy shit. It's amazing. This lady brought a dead guy to the bank. No. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Is that a person or a dummy? He's dead. He's a dead guy. He's fully dead.

Try to get to secure a loan. She's like, no, no, it's fine. It's all good here, but put that in your hand. Sign this right here. And they're like, oh my God, look at this bitch. I mean, the guy's fully dead. Bank employees eventually calls the police who arrest the woman. She could say, well, he died on the way over. I didn't know he was dead. I thought he was just sleepy. Jesus.

Just wanted to get some money. That's our president. You have some respect. That's not our president. Yes, it was. That's a dead guy. That was literally our president. Do you think Biden's alive? Yes. And if you think he wasn't alive, do you think they'd tell us? If they have this body double out there running around for national security reasons, don't you think they would just keep their mouth shut? No, because I think it would behoove them if she got to be president because then she's a stronger nominee.

So if he was dead then they would it would be good because she would be the president then and then who and then they would yeah hmm, but now There were rumors going around that during this window of time where he vanished from the face of the earth Which is not a thing that happens with presidents where you don't know where they are Where he was like having a seizure he was like this internet stuff abducted by aliens and they groomed. Yeah, that's how he's better. I

Or Beelzebub. The aliens came along. They used the new tech. He opened the gateway. He gained six inches, spry, pep in his step. Here's the question I have. I don't know if he's going to be there in January, through January. Right. Right. Yeah, he's got to make it. And I'm very worried about Taiwan. Yeah. Because if I'm China or if I'm Putin, now's the time to move. Right. We've got a vacuum of leadership in the White House. Ooh. Ugh.

That's a scary one. You think he's going to serve out the term? I don't know. When I see that guy that supposedly is Biden, I'm like, I don't know what's going on now. Since we live in a simulation, and I'm going to spoil the best comedy of all time, Veep, at a certain point, Veep becomes president, and then she's voted out five months later. And since Officer Harris is basically Selina Meyer just dipped in chocolate, I don't think he's going to be president through January. Wow.

So who becomes vice president? She's going to pick one of these governors, right? Who's she going to pick? It's either Roy Cooper of North Carolina, Andy Beshear of Kentucky, or Josh Shapiro of Pennsylvania is the short list is what I heard. You know what they do? They do what kind of an insecure comic does. That's the one I was talking about, yeah. Look at this one. Look at him walking. Look how tall he is. He's towering over her. But also how quickly he's walking. Yeah, he doesn't understand. He thinks he's walking like an old man because that's a 40-year-old dude.

Very strange. He definitely is walking way better. Yeah. Can you put a photo just of Biden walking, Jamie? There's also a kind of a power to his step, like he's trying to walk slowly. Yeah, well, there's an effortlessness to the way he's walking. This is, again, armchair physiologist Joe Rogan. When I'm looking at... Oh, wait, look, side by side. Wow. This is from April or something? Okay, which is the fake one? I'm not sure. The tall one on the left? Yeah.

Choreography acknowledging the body's awkward on-camera walks to the south lawn ring his halting stiff gate Well, that looks the same as the other one the one on the left does yeah, that looks like this again Nah, that looks a little more effortless dude. Look he's look he's much more casual I mean he's walking with a little bit of stiffness to his arms, but it's much more casual with his legs Let me see it again. I don't know. I might be fucking with my own mind. I

He's definitely taller, though. He looks taller, yeah. That's the thing. The big one is this one. That's the big one. Yeah. Yeah. That one's nuts. That one freaks me out. Because, look, he's walking fine. He's walking fine, and he's so big. Look how big he is. Like, clearly bigger. Would you ever want to get a body double, a Joe Rogan body double? I have four of them right now. Do you? Yeah. They're doing sets all over the country on open mic nights. Oh, shit, I just saw Joe Rogan. Can you imagine? Yeah, well, the thing is about, like...

You can find a tall, thin person. Well, you can probably find some short jack guys that can pretend to be me. Of course, yeah. You just have to... And there's enough... There's plenty... Like, especially if you're just watching video. Yeah. So that's a different one. Yeah, see, okay, yeah. That one's very slow. But also, that could be the end of the day. But also look at his posture, though. The head's at an angle instead of straight up. Right. That's the difference for me. Well, it's also... He looks like he's struggling there to walk. Whereas the other one of the new guy, the recent one...

He doesn't look like he's struggling at all. So this is the, look how he's going up the stairs. Effortless man. Weird. He's going up the stairs like a regular person. Yeah, not falling. Well, he's not struggling. There's like a hitch to the gate. Like what you saw at the debate when he had to step down off the platform, he had to do it sideways. Can we, like, remember when she was asked about the debate by Stephen Colbert? So look at this one right now. So this is him walking in that other one. He's really struggling there.

But again, that could be just like his mental ability. It could come and go. Especially with that fucking juicy alien cocktail they jazzed him up with. Or it could be jet lag. Imagine if he really did grow six inches. It really is Biden. If you really do have some stuff, it rejuvenates you, but you also grow. I'll get on that shit in two minutes. It'll be a real problem. Why? We're going to look like the Anunnaki. Like that dude with the fucking rubber in his face. We're all going to be ten feet tall. Maybe that's what the Anunnaki are.

Because the whole thing is that they're supposed to be way taller than us. I was talking to Kurt Metzger about this. Oh, boy. And I love Kurt. He's the best. I know. He will go off, though. He will go off and his eyes get crazy and he gets to your face and he's sucking on a vape pad. It's so great. And I'm just, gimme, gimme, gimme. Oh, he's the best. And he had this whole thing about the typography of the different aliens. And these ones hate these ones and these ones look white and these ones look like Aryans. Kurt believes everything.

Jimmy Dore show wrecked him. Being on that show, he was normal before he started going over there. Yeah. Well, he was always crazy. But he was like a different kind of crazy. Yeah, but I don't think Kurt's crazy because everything he says, I look up and there's receipts. It's based on something. No, no, no. I don't mean crazy like incorrect.

Right, okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He's a maniac. Yeah, yes. I'll show you the walls of text that he sends me. I'm sure he sends them to you too. Yes, of course. Walls. He lives here now. Walls of, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, I trucked him into moving here. Yeah, good. But he's the best. And he's such a funny dude too. And his ability to have jokes, he's like a joke machine. For any situation that comes up, meh, meh.

There are two things Kurt told me that I think about like once a week because they're so funny. And I'm just like, I'm in the presence of like a comedy legend. One is he was talking to Patrice O'Neill and Kurt had just seen Fight Club.

And Patrice is like, oh, that's the ultimate white people movie. And Kurt's like, what do you mean? He goes, oh, I don't have enough violence in my life. I got to go seek it out. I want someone to punch me in the face. I don't know what that's like. He's like, yeah. So that was one. And then Kurt did his homework on Paula Deen, who got canceled because she used the N-word once. And he looked it up and it turned out that she said it when she was getting robbed at gunpoint as a bank clerk.

And he goes, this is the most progressive old fat southern white lady ever. He goes, they should build a statue to her. That's really when she said it? Yes. And dads will bring their sons and the plaque will say she only said it once. Look, son, this is a progressive. I didn't know that's what happened. Yes. Per Kurt, please double check this. Yeah, you never know. He also told me that that plane that disappeared got sucked into a vortex by UFOs. No, he didn't. Oh, yeah, he sent me videos. The Malaysian. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that one.

Well, remember Don Lemon asked if it was a black hole on CNN, the dumbest man, formerly dumbest man on television? What if it was a black hole? Isn't it interesting watching guys like him without the whole production crew? What about Chris Cuomo? Yeah. Yeah. Fredo.

Well, what Dave Smith did to him, holy shit. That was like Mike Tyson versus Marvis Frazier in the 80s. It was a beautiful, beautiful thing. And it couldn't happen to a better guy. And it's even funnier is, you know how Greeks like Tantalus, like in the afterlife, he's always reaching for water or food and it's always out of his reach because he served his son to the gods as food.

Like when you're on CNN, like Rogan and these podcasts, even the audience is a hundred times bigger. It's like beneath you because they're like nothing. And I'm the real guy. And now he's got to be a sidekick on Patrick, but David, no disrespect to Patrick at all. And he knows that every single person at CNN, the camera guys, the door guy is laughing at what a nothing in their eyes he's become. It's kind of genius by Patrick to put him on a show. It is personal hell. It's kind of genius. Yeah.

Because you really can't escape not just what you've said, but the tendencies that you've developed in being on those broadcast networks. And the sneering. Yeah. So kudos to Patrick. It's kind of crazy. It's hilarious. Yeah. Well, Elon did it too with Lemon, with one show. Well, Lemon wanted ownership.

Well, it's not just that. The way they had the conversation. He was trying to do CNN outside of CNN. That's how Elon said it. He's doing CNN outside of CNN. And now, bitch can't get arrested. Yeah. But that's like the quality of his discourse, right? That's where he deserves to be. It's not good conversation. It's not interesting. You know what I always say? I say the enemy class is not composed of impressive people. And now the biggest alpha male on CNN is Caitlin Collins. Yeah.

Yeah, they're all gone. Well, Jake Tapper's still there. Yeah, that's true. He did it. Jake Tapper's an honest guy, I think. I, and who was the other woman? Martha, who was the female moderator? I don't know. Dana Bash, was that her name? I, and everyone else.

Everyone else must give them credit for doing such an honest and fair job of the debate. They let them both speak. They didn't talk over them. The questions were reasonable and tough questions for both parties. I didn't think he had it in him. So kudos to Jake Tapper. And I'm going to apologize for saying that he always looks like someone just farted. Yeah. Because he did a great job. And he also did a great job with Chris Coons, who's head of Biden's campaign campaign.

He was holding his feet to the fire about the debate. So I didn't know where this came from, but I was wrong about Jake Tapper. Yeah. I think there's a lot of people that are in media that didn't want to do the thing that they're doing now. They didn't want to do it that way. But now they're in this machine, and this is what they want to do because they want to keep their career. Well, this is their only way to have status. These are mediocre people.

Yeah. They don't have, they're not going to, if you're not writing for the New York Times, no one's reading your sub stack. You're a nobody and a nothing. You're not interesting. They're not impressive or interesting people. Right. Look at this guy, No Opinion, who like he's, if you look at his photo, he looks like Jared from Subway. Who? Exactly. Exactly.

Who are you talking about? Noah Pinion. Who's that? He's one of these nobody. Oh, is it Noah Pinion? Yes. Not Noah. No, it's Noah Pinion. I thought you were saying Noah Pinion. N-O-A-H-P-I-N-I-O-N. So it's like Mike Hunt? You know, like Mike Hunt? It's just like that. Yeah. Except he would not like that. Has anybody seen Mike Hunt? And no one's seen Noah Pinion. Interesting. Well, there's a lot of those guys, right? A lot of them. Yeah. Yeah.

And you think they're just getting paid just like this conservative guy that I know? I don't think it's necessarily that they're getting paid. It's that like they do not, they're violently anti-charismatic. No one wants them at the party. So all they can do is go on these other, and I say this to someone who does this a lot myself, go on like social media and try to kind of make Aaron Ruppar make a name for yourself by just spouting complete nonsense. Who's the best at it? Best in what way? Keith.

My favorite angry lesbian. She literally has brain damage. He's a gift. Really? Oh, yeah. What happened? Traumatic brain injury. From what? Like got hit by like a cinder block or something. Whoa. Look this up, Jamie. It's on his Wikipedia. Oh, that makes sense. Yeah. So he said, did you see that? He said the CNN building should be burned down. Oh. He said kick everyone out and burn down the building. For what? Because of the bait. Wow. Wow.

Yeah. This is not someone who's well. So when did he get it in the head? I think the 80s. Whoa. It's been a minute. Yeah. Oh, man. And what's even funnier is his Twitter. He used to have a million Twitter followers and it's slowly been going down because at a certain point, even the boom was like, OK, dude, calm down. Trump isn't literally going to kill you tomorrow. He's amazing. Yeah. He's so great. He's a gift. Remember when you used to do that show from his basement? Oh, yeah.

Like the resistance. Yeah. You know, and any day now Donald Trump will be locked up. So I'm just going to shut the show down. Well, he was right. He did get locked up. Eventually. Yeah, they arrested him. Yeah, eventually. That's a crazy one, huh? The 34 counts of felony counts that were all misdemeanors. And did you see Andrew Cuomo? Yeah.

Yeah. Came out and said, this is bullshit? Yeah, and talked about it on Bill Maher. Yeah. That, I was surprised at. Cuomo was a guy they shouldn't have got rid of because that guy could have won. He could have been the president. What about killing all the old people? Yeah, that was a little bit of a problem. We didn't know. We didn't know. When you're president, you're supposed to kill young people, not old people. Right, not supposed to take COVID patients and throw them back in the nursing homes.

And then put a bunch of people on ventilators. Whoops. Yeah. Whoopsies. But they didn't know. They thought ventilators were the way to go. But they knew. Sure. But the point is, if you got something this bad wrong and then tried to cover it up, it's going to be hard to get through that White House. Yeah. That's a bit of an issue. Yeah.

the nursing home. And also, as a New York Jew, that New York Italian attitude, I don't know if that works in middle America if you're trying to be president. You're going to have to do something to deal with. Well, Chelsea Handler said she was cuomo-sexual, so that settles that. Chelsea Handler was that, but that dude's final form was...

Everybody loved Cuomo when he was running New York at the beginning of the pandemic because he seemed so reasonable and measured and leader-like. One thing I did like about him is that he would have those daily updates. So he was trying to do what he could to be as visible and have as much information as possible. Better than the lady they have now who says black people don't know what computers are. Kathy Hochul.

Jesus Christ. Get this bitch a broom and send her back where she came from. Holy crap. Jesus Christ. Isn't that wild? They don't know what computers are. New York is a wrap. This is why I'm here. Oh, I want credit from your boy, Elon. What'd you do? I am the first person on earth, I believe, learning how to drive on a Cybertruck. Really? Yes.

You didn't know how to drive at all? I still don't really. Oh my God. My buddy Colin Robbs, a professional car tester, whatever, NASCAR. My buddy Sky King, they rented a Cybertruck. They're like, all right, let's do it. It's like my fourth lesson. I only clipped one window. On what would you hit? I wasn't told, Colin, that when you're going down these narrow streets, you're supposed to hug the median instead of imagining if there's two lanes.

So some parked car had a window, had a mirror, excuse me, and I clicked it. But it was fine, and the window popped off the Cybertruck, the mirror, and we popped it back on. Oh, so it just bent backwards. Not even, like a little, just bent in. Right, yeah, well, they give in. They move. That's the way they're designed. That's a crazy car to learn how to drive on. Yeah, it was wide. Yeah, big, and also like...

Heavy as fuck but I felt safe that if I got an accident somebody else would have the consequences. That's true Which was that's the fear that people have about people driving those things essentially driving a giant steel box It's bulletproof and you know that puts on a like a show. Oh, yeah, I'll dance for you There's a laser show and there's also a megaphone

Really? Yeah. And also, he's a Simpsons fan because when Homer Simpson designed a car for his brother and ruined his brother's company, Homer said, there should be horns everywhere and they should all play La Cucaracha and you can make the horn one of like 15 choices is La Cucaracha. Oh my God. And I know that's a Simpsons joke. That's hilarious. He's done a lot of wild things with that car, with all of his cars. It's like, you know, if you say, you press the speak thing and say open butthole,

The port opens up to charge it. No, it doesn't. Really? Yes, it does. I'll show you. Mine's out here. Oh, my God. That's hilarious. You say open butthole and the port pops open. He's like 14. There's very few humans like him that are going to be able to run a social media site like that and also just be able to handle being attacked relentlessly and like complete Teflon. Open butthole. See? Did someone say it? Open butthole. Yeah. Say it.

Hilarious. I've been around him a couple of times. I've never hung out with him, so I'm looking forward to it. He's a good dude. Yeah. He's a fascinating character. I mean, he's handling this very bizarre position in life about as good as you can. I mean, no one's going to handle that very well. I think he really stuck his neck out with Twitter. I'm dead naming it. Yeah.

$44 billion is a big stick your neck out because what's it worth now? I don't think it's the money to stick your neck out. It's that he's a target now. And the people who used to love him for the electric cars now think he's a fascist. Isn't that interesting? Like the people that loved him in California, if you drove a Tesla, it was a sign that you were environmentally conscious. You read The New Yorker. Yeah, you're a good person. Yeah. Yeah, you're driving a Tesla. I still think – I don't think there's a stigma to it yet. Not yet. They haven't completely – They're too good.

Then they haven't completely marginalized him or tried to or stigmatized him rather, I should say. It just doesn't work. It just kind of drifts off of him because there's so much support for him, you know?

It's just most people recognize that you really, especially when the Twitter files came out, when Taibbi and Schellenberger released all those Twitter files. And you realize like there was like a real concerted effort to hide the truth from people. And then people being gaslit to be like, we knew all this the whole time. No, no, we didn't. It's also the stuff about COVID with Jay Bhattacharya and all those other people that got unfairly maligned.

you know real ex actual experts and the government was telling them to suppress them which also tells me that they wouldn't be able to do it a second time you think so because he i think he he's autistic enough that he dig in his heels right and that's not a knock against him that's a compliment i wonder if someone's going to try to take him out he's got great security and body doubles

Does he have body doubles? Well, he's got that Chinese guy. He's got to be like a robot. He's got to have like Lex, 100 clones of himself. Have you seen the Chinese Elon? No. There's a guy who looks almost exactly like him who lives in China. So slightly off. Like if it was like you spliced him. Wait, you're saying there's a Chinese person who looks like somebody else? It looks almost exactly like Elon. Not like a regular Chinese guy.

Can you pull it off? I can't tell if this is real or not. I think it's real because... I just want to make sure I didn't pull the wrong video up as well. Right. Because he can fuck with you now. He's just going to pull up Jackie Chan. Bruce Lee. I think this is him. It doesn't look like a deepfake. Oh, yeah. Okay, I can see it. I mean... I think. Yeah, I think that's the one. I can see it, yeah. It looks like a deepfake too. It does look a little deepfake-y. That's not how Elon talks.

God, that's pretty close. But the motions aren't correct. Yeah, but the thing he's doing with his lips. The eyes aren't moving right. That looks fake. Yeah. And the clothes are way off. That didn't, right? At the end it looked okay. One million followers. Holy crap. There's a lot of videos of this guy up there. It's hard to say, man, because there's something about his face to me. I got that uncanny valley thing going on with this. Like it might, this looks like bullshit. Oh, by the way. He's got good dimples moving here.

Besides the muscles in the face are moving pretty good. The eyes are really creepy. Those are Elon eyes. It's just the weird eyes. It's so close. But he doesn't look Asian. That's what's weird. That's Elon's face. That really does look like some AI shit. That's got to be AI. There's no way that's not AI. That's Elon's face. Google is the Asian Elon Musk fake.

That's Elon's. That was Elon's face. The one that I saw that I remember seeing was from about two years ago, and it was much less obvious. It was like close. Like, oh, look at that. Guy looks just like him. Oh. Oh. Has been suspended. Why is he suspended? Chinese doppelganger suspended from China's TikTok. Huh. Interesting. So it's real. Huh. Huh.

He's been dubbed by the internet. Wait, I'm sorry. Why are we not calling him the Chinese knockoff? That's the line. Well, he just did. He's the Chinese knockoff, Elon. Much cheaper. Shittier quality. He's been deleted on Weibo, on...

All but three posts are left. Yilong Musk. The account largely inactive as well. Local reports have noticed that Yilong's doppelganger was banned for violating community guidelines. See, I wonder if they're running him through a filter, though. There's got to be. Come on. That was crazy. It seems like he's a really good software engineer, and he just said, fuck it, I'll show you how good I am. Yeah, I mean, it seems like he's probably close enough and then did some shenanigans. Right.

It's gonna be so hard to tell face swap isn't that hard to do not hard at all and in AI generated videos and images It's gonna be so hard. There's been ones of you. Oh, yeah. Oh, did you see what you want? Just played up things. Did you see the one of Kamala Harris? Yeah. Oh my god. That's hilarious. And do you see what Gavin Newsom said to him? No Gavin Newsom said that you should be posting this we're gonna make it illegal and I'm gonna sign a law and He said professor suck on these nuts. No, he didn't. Yes. He did. Oh

Elon said that to Gavin Newsom? Yes, he did. Yeah. Pull that post up, Jamie. It's so hilarious. He said, Professor Sagan Deez Nuts says it's legit and that parody is...

Legal. I forget what his exact quote was, I'm paraphrasing, but "Parity is allowed by law." Which it should be. Yeah, no shit! Yeah, but the fact that they're using AI to generate her saying a bunch of stuff. Wasn't that actually her voice though? Yeah. I thought they clipped it, it wasn't AI. Oh, it wasn't AI? I thought it was like sound bites that they stitched together. Perhaps. Because it's not, it's choppy. Right.

But yeah, I don't know how they did it be the most certainly could do it with AI though that but that would also make it seem choppy because it doesn't really run in the cadence of a normal human speed but it seemed like the words were like

They just added the words were not anything fancy. Remember when they did that with Reagan? No. Yeah, they did that with Reagan. That was the first one they ever did way, way, way back in the day. I think it was Iran. I forget which country did it, but they made some fake audio recording of Reagan. And then...

upon analysis and again this is in the eighties right so the technology was very crude time they just audio stitched it together and edited it they found bits and pieces from each one of his speeches that they'd compiled this this one thing to but that was the first time that ever happened Elon retweets altered Kamala Harris campaign says manipulate says back up says manipulating voices in an ad like this should be illegal I'll be signing a bill in a matter weeks to make sure it is and then he says on a

I checked with renowned world authority professor Sagan Deez Nuts, and he said parody is legal in America. Oh, my God. God.

Hilarious. We don't deserve him. Hilarious. What a wild dude. Wow. What a wild dude. Because he's not scared of those folks. Because he's the richest man in the world. Would you be... It's not like... Would you be scared of Gavin Newsom? No. But it's also like what Gavin Newsom represents. Right. He's a part of this machine. Right. You know, you attack him like that, they're going to attack you. Even if you don't attack him... See if you can find that Reagan thing. Even if you don't attack him like that, they're going to attack you. The Reagan audio compilation. I forget what it was in reference to, but it was something...

I mean, Reagan was saying something outrageous that he would never say. Well, they have that for like Ayn Rand. They have a bunch of people saying whatever you want them to say. But this was back in the day. And then they put it on television, on the news, showing all the different pieces of different speeches of him wearing different suits of all the things that he had actually said and how they had pieced it together. This is like very early on indication that you got to be careful with technology. This was very rudimentary technology, relatively speaking.

I do. A couple more minutes. They took a bunch of Ronald Reagan speeches and they spliced them together to make an inaccurate, a fake, make him say something he never really said. But I remember it was on the news. It was like a big deal. I don't remember this at all. I feel like I'm Reagan. I don't remember it.

Maybe it's one of those... Mandela effect? Yeah. I'm having something with that right now. With what? My friend, Michael Wolff, he's a strength coach here in Austin. He's got a great dog named Chops. And I remember very distinctly that Chops looks like he's mostly Great Dane. He's got the coat color. He's big.

And I remember distinctly Michael telling me, oh, we did the DNA test. He's actually not Great Dane at all. He's something, something else and has some Rhodesian Ridgeback. And I'm hanging out with him in shops. And I go to him. I go, it's just so funny that there's no Great Dane in him. And he goes, what are you talking about? And I go, you did the test. He goes, never did this test. And I don't know any other dog where this could be. So I'm paying for him to do the DNA test to see if this is a Mandela effect thing.

Because I remember very specifically that conversation. That's bizarre. Yep. You think the simulation's real? Yes. I know it's real because it keeps winking. You've had it wink to you all the time, I'm sure. I was with you at the green room and I go, Joe, like,

like all these things are happening. Like, does it ever get normal? He goes, no, you go, no, no, no. You're just gonna have to go with it like this. Like I talked to Jordan Peterson about this. He goes at a certain point you wake up and you're like, Oh, the president's yelling me today. And he's like, you just have to accept this is what your reality is. Yeah. When it happens to me, I just hear that Queens of the Stone Age song. Go with the flow. Yeah.

It's like, all right, this is this. So yeah, Roseanne's texting me now. Okay, I guess this is my life. This is what we're dealing with. Yes. Of course we're in a simulation. You don't think that this is a 3D projection of a 4D world. Who's running it? The machine elves? Right.

That's more likely. Yes. Yeah. Tricksters. Yes. That's why it's so silly. That's why it's so fun for me. Right. And for you and any comedian. Right. A real comedian. Yeah. If you really embrace the chaos. Yeah. Not if you're Chelsea Handler. You don't double mask and tell people how to vote. Yes. And put on a song and dance for Pfizer. Yes. God. Good Lord. Good Lord. Stephen Colbert's priest must be. But he wasn't really a comedian. Colbert was never a stand-up.

Yeah, but Strangers with Candy was one of the greatest shows of all time. It was one of the most transgressive shows of all time. I don't know what Strangers with Candy is.

I never watched it. I only knew him from the Colbert Report and from being on The Daily Show. Stranger with Candy is one of the greatest shows of all time. Really? I'll tell you what it's about. It's about starring Amy Sedaris, David Sedaris' sister. It's about a woman named Jerry Blank who returns to high school, picking up her life where she left it off as a teenage runaway. And she became a user, a boozer, and a loser. So she's this 47-year-old ex-junkie prostitute. Oh, that movie's hilarious. Yeah. And Colbert was her teacher. 99.

Wow. Well, Colbert was amazing as that character. Yes. And then when you see him on his actual show, you're like, hey, is that really you? Who are you? He knows better. That's why he's not off the hook in my book. Mr. Knoblet was the teacher, yeah. Jerry, I know that we have our tough times and you think that I hate you, but I want you to know that I hate you. She's like, I hate you too, Mr. Knoblet. We probably shouldn't hug now.

I want to check that show out. How many seasons did it go? Winona Ryder was in the last episode. No kidding. They got Winona Ryder on TV. It's so weird that I never heard of it before. The pilot episode. Maybe I didn't. I forgot. The pilot episode, they try to get Jerry to spy on her locker mate because they suspect her locker mate might be retarded.

And they're like, well, why do you want me to turn her in? And he's like, well, you've got those braces and they tend to be attracted to shiny objects. Oh, my God. So that was the pilot episode.

Wow. It had three seasons, but it was only on TV for like a year and a half. No, no, it was three years. It wasn't a year. That's what this says. I'm looking at the Wikipedia. It says like season three started in July 2000 and ended October 2000. When did season one start? April 99, ended July 99. Wow, they were that quick? Yeah, those six-month seasons. There was one episode. What was it on? Comedy Central. Oh, okay. That makes sense. In My Living Reframed, because I wrote to her, she's hooking up with a football player,

And she's like, don't worry about getting me pregnant. My ovaries are diseased. So I have my ovaries. To Michael, my ovaries are diseased. Jerry Blank, signed by Amy. That's awesome. It's a great. So he was on this show. And like him and the other teacher are giving each other blowjobs in the bathroom. Like that kind of humor. And now look at him. Yeah. Remember when he was dancing with Chuck Schumer and he high fives him? Ever see that? No. Oh, yeah. They're all wearing masks and dancing around outside.

And he's dancing. Chuck Schumer. And he dances over and high-fives Chuck Schumer. I hope it's worth it for him, however much money they give him. There he is. Watch this. See they're all dancing? Look. No, no, no. Yeah, look at him. No, no. Look at him. All these people with masks on outside. That lady's double-masking. Why take chances? But he's not wearing a mask. Of course. He's a rebel. He's from Strangers with Candy. He's a wild man. Look at him. Well, he probably recently got vaccinated or something. Ridiculous.

The mask days. Even when I look at videos and I see people wearing masks, I can't believe that's real. I can't believe that was just a couple of years ago. What about you still see them in the airports? Yeah. Goofy people.

Well, I always assume now that they have like some disease. It's a good thing to assume. I used to assume they're from another country. Yeah. Yeah. People from other countries would wear masks all the time. There were a lot of masks in Japan. Just being polite. They're just being polite. They don't want to spit on you. Yeah. These people over here are just nuts. You got to go to Japan, dude. I will go. Michael Malice, you're the fucking man. I appreciate you very much. It's always fun hanging out with you. Thank you so much, sir. My pleasure, brother. Let's hang out. Yep. Okay. Bye, everybody. Bye.