Bethany Hamilton: Men in Women’s Sports, Marriage Advice, and Why You Need to Homeschool Your Kids
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How do you deal with fear? Okay, so I deal with your maybe more naturally and Better than your average human. But it's not like a really thoughtful process for me. It's truly just facing my fears and not letting my fear is like overtake me so much that I get paralyzed.

And so I think maybe since I you know, when I lost my m when I was thirteen years old, I had such a deep passion for surfing that my decision to get back in the ocean was base stuff of, like, getting back to my passion in my love. Heroding lives are not just facing my fear. And I had like a deeper reason, like, I just love doing what I did.

And so I wanted to see if I was possible with one ARM. So I truly just face to my fears. And over the time, I think facing them over and over and over gun, I eventually became less fearful of sharks, so to say.

And it's only i've heard that, uh, sharks and motivational speaking are like people's two greatest fears. And that's like the two things that I do. I start with shark ks in the ocean, whatever, like, you know, overcome my like incident with the shark.

And then I do motivational speaking, which I I would say I didn't like that at first, but eventually I overcame that like, that dislike, or that fear, or that uncomfortably. And I think so often in life, we naturally wanted, like run from discomfort. You know, we want to make things as easy and comfortable as possible.

And so if you can learn to recognize that sometimes you can do that and sometimes have to, like, walk into uncomfortable, no, I finally like relationships. For example, sometimes you have to have the uncomfortable conversations to make that relationship more beautiful. But a lot of us just wanna like, avoid that and said and the in the long run, that just makes the relationship less beautiful and less meaningful unless filled with depth and then eventually that relationship may dissipate.

Absolutely right. Um that's a more subtle process, of course, that is sort of like, you know getting diabetes doesn't happen all once. It's like over time getting in the ocean to go surfing again is a very abot experience.

Yeah and I think for me, IT wasn't like I was going out to like the shark est location. You know when you as a surfer, there's certain spots that you're like, U I got the heb G B S here. Or you know, when you serve at sun hour, or if the waters a little like this feels a little more and scared, yeah, uncomfortable.

So I started off and like the shallow, clear blue waters and IT. So my initial serve with one ARM wasn't filled with a deep fear, like, of course, I was thinking of them. I mean, I was so recent, I started surfing with one ARM three and a half weeks after .

I lost my ARM three weeks. Yeah.

I was on a mission. I basically went as soon as the doctor said I could and my my healing was really fast because everything was really clean. Ka, and I had a great surgeon and you know I just had one of those cases that was um I would say a little easier than most um you know traumatic and last and so here I am lesson four weeks later getting back on .

my board and uh I think .

my mom was scared that I wouldn't be able to do IT. So she's trying to come up with a new you know options like you could be a photography can we can go the mountains snowboard um but my dad, I think he saw he was like, let's go and he was like there with me trying to help me catch my first waves and i'm like, no doud I got this on my own behold, I popped up on my third wave and wrote IT all the way to the beach felt like one of the best waves in my life. Just tears of joy and just that sense of like, well, what I can do this .

yeah my life as a child I don't I don't see how just a paddling part. I don't see how you could do that.

Yes, it's definitely I have adopted in my own unique way. And think'll ly, I have one really strong arms. So we make the most about, we got here.

But yeah, my approach to are catching me. I was just different like a lot of times people will take like ten fifteen strokes with me. I'm trying to position as close to the takeoff as possible so that I take one to three strokes to catch the wave and so it's definitely different. Um but I make IT work.

but your father didn't hesitate in bringing you back to you.

I think my dad, just like both my parents resell so they get IT, they get that love for the ocean. They get that need to like get back out there. And yeah you know you could be fearful of sharks.

I think that's like one of the number one questions I get like why would you go back into the ocean? Um but for me you know that I was my way of life IT was something I dead every single day. And even though I was Young, I wanted to be the best in the world and I had the potential to be the best in the world.

I thought like very highly competitive. I was winning just about every of that I entered the summer before thirteen or twelve. I've finished second in the national titles in the eighteen and under division. So I was like, kind of heading on that trajectory. So this I like he could be a world champ um and so on top of being competitive though, like competition, I D I could care less about a jerk like I just love being an ocean now afford i'm a mom for and i'm passing on my love .

to my children yeah um you don't i'm just so good at breakfast and your total lack of bitterness or self pity um which leads to optimism and joyfulness of course but how how long did that take to reach?

I am so grateful, you know, I have my mom was very encouraging to me in my child to no god and have faith and so I look at my thirteen year old self and really think like child like faith, like that's what that thing he had at that time. And that helped to me to overcome that season and to be grateful for your life. Like I woke up thinking I could have died, but i'm still here and i'm so grateful to be alive. And even though my life felt upside down and my future fell unset and like IT was obviously really hard, chaotic time but I had this piece that I believe only god can bringing um that even though I didn't know that my future was gonna hold, I trust that there is more for my life and i'm grateful to be alive and that gratitude really push me forward I think like I didn't mobile.

I I didn't like sitting focus on like the negative of the situation and how often IT was I would even say too like I did media really early on um kind of willingly like as a little thirteen year old because I had a heart for other people and I wanted to encourage people so I started surfing four weeks later and then people like, oh my god, I just see little girls like loving how to serve with when I made after he loses because some people who are just uninspired. This is like before social media. But my story truly went super viral.

I remember I will get letters from all different walks of life like inmates to like people all over the world, like little girls, like a father. I can serve with arms. I can overcome mine chAllenge. And so I had a heart for other people. And so I was willing to talk about my story and, like, share what I had went through in my desire to keep going and overcoming. And but I think talking about IT really helped me to overcome the traumatic side of IT like just facing the traumatic incident and talking about IT like now I think I can think about the exact mind. And I don't feel like overwarm with sadness or anger or you know IT just IT is what IT is sort of a feeling um and I think talking about IT really helped that .

in its you woke up the next day after losing your ARM feeling grateful yes.

that's wild. Yeah I was in the hospital and I was just really grateful to be alive. Anything the doctor is painted the picture of like, hey, you lost over sixty percent of your blood, you could have died like, it's a blessing that you're still here. But more importantly, I trusted that god had more for my life.

What did you think you are gna do do you have any sense of what your life would look like?

Um I had no clue. And I think that uncertain t felt really hard. And I think a lot of people who face traumatic situations, they wanted just get back to Normal life.

So maybe that was part of my desire. Get back in the service was like, but just back to Normal life. Like, I want to be back in ocean doing what I love being with my friends, you know.

And so once I prove that I could do IT, then there was no turning back. I start ping, not in every day again, and just get him back to Normal life. And IT took time to adapt, to adjust and figure out how to do things. And there is definitely days where i'd be completely frustrated and crying and like the waves just sending me back to the beach. So frustrating like I think anyone who spends time in the ocean can know that, like it's such a humbling place, no matter how strong or capable you are, will humble you regardless .

I can hurt.

yeah. And so doing IT with one ARM, I think that also gave me confidence to this, the other chAllenges in my life. And like, if I can.

So with one ARM, what else is possible with one ARM? And like all the other areas of my life, so IT really set me on this trajectory to be willing to adopt, to just make the most of what I have and have caught. And so remember how a little ethne just adopting in every which way did you ever think .

you would have four children?

I always really looked forward to being a mom, and I think because my mom had so much fun with me, and I was apparent that he loved being a mom and that he loved adventuring with me and my brothers that showed. And so I think that inspired me. I want to be a mom.

And so, yeah, fast for d being a mom is such a joy in my life. And I always thought I would have three. But here we are, only how that happened.

IT just happen. yeah. IT is crazy. Like, we got married and you type like many couple.

Like, let's wait five years before we have children and then like about later I got pregnant. I'm like, okay, let's go. Even though I felt scared at that time. Like, I think god's timing was perfect. And I loved just basically bringing our little guy into our life in taking him along for the riot.

I I was any unique season in that I kind of quit competing and thankful fully I did because that's when I met my husband and then we got married and he is like, k, what i'll still wanted do and serve because it's not like that something you couldn't do forever. So let's just like do a little more surfing and you can like check of all your goals and your dreams and serve. So we started traveling and film in my documentation, unstoppable. And then I get pa gnant like, oh my god like I felt my world was slipped upside down. But I just ended up we brought our little too bias along for the ride with us and I had some of my greatest success in surfing um in that and after having my first child and I finished my documentary and then then you brought him .

with you yeah so .

my one you're all to had like more passport stamps than like you're average human. And we did not remember this one flight IT was thirteen hours uh across the world to the all gives and we did some shooting down there. Then i'm like nursing home and about to put out for my heat in fuji competing. And we just made that work.

You most Young parents? B, I include myself, and I find IT really hard to travel .

with little kids. Oh, my goi like having babies on airplane is not easy. And so but we cannot just figured out how to make this work. And I think because we emerged into that early on, you get your little tricks on the on the road, wooden, you just become more adoptable.

I think click, I think routine, so good for children, but we definitely had a lot of routine disrupt and we just had to like, create our own routine on the road. Yeah and yeah, I was really a lot of fun. I like look back on that season. And I mean, my season hasn't changed that much. We still .

travel at a IT with the world from where you live. And you brought all of your children and you're Young.

Your little ones one. Yep, little ones one. And then I got a three year old, six year old than nine year old.

It's it's interesting that you do that. When did you decide that you are just gonna stay a unit whatever you went?

Yes, I think we realized that we were just still traveling a lie and we actually were trying to crea business and that be sustainable within howie. And we actually ran into some business trouble. So we are like, we can figure how we do, did everything.

And we I just ended up being that traveling for a work. I do a lot of motivational speaking, which I absolutely love doing, that I love being and courage and inspire people. Obviously, traveling with a family of six is not ideal, but I like the last thing I want to do is leave them home, like I would have inner inks and I just wait.

I know that IT wouldn't work for me, like I would lose my mind. And I know that my greatest scot given all is to be a mother. And if i'm nega in that role, like I won't be able to live at peace. And so just bringing them along is the way we've dt, we're doing IT right now and it's working and they are just blossom ming and humans like it's really fun to see i'm growing in their own ways and just being along for .

the ride get closer to each other.

Oh yeah, last night, yesterday was rough. We are all super jet lag. We had done a red eye and i'm like at one point like got side, like don't come back in until you're ready to be a piece. So you know there's rough moments, but for the most part, they get along really well.

I love that and you try husband .

so we are just my husband thing. So he is kind behind the scenes making things happen. And then i'm showing up and doing a lot of like what we do. And so yeah, it's really a unique life and I love doing IT though with my husband and it's just like we're the ultimate team and then the little are like a little million along for the right.

It's just a completely different model of living from the one that most americans, certain ly, I grew up with where, you know, the father or both parents sort of head out, you know, in the morning to their own totally separate fears of work, and then the kids go out to school, their separate fears, and then possibly i'll meet together for a meal at night. They go to bed.

Yeah, it's definitely different. And I think what made me more open to this life that we've chosen to live um was I home school from seventh grade on and we .

go up home?

yes. yeah. I grew up being home called myself. So my mom kept me home from seventh great.

And I did elementary school and then I stayed home after that. And IT was primarily like there was a few different reasons. Our local public school was super bad.

We couldn't afford private. And I was also like really highly competitive. I was already starting to travel for surf. And so my parents decided to keep me home and save that drive time to our school is really far away, like forty five minute drive, our um one way, so two hours just driving to school. And so we just decided to stay home and my parents just kind of let me run with things.

And then I started serving with one ARM and you been competing with one ARM and that started less than a year later after I losing my ARM. And so two summer later I win a national title and then I started competing um in the world qualifier series so of just like the biggest league in serve to be a professional. And so I started travelling in our international around seventeen, like traveling around the world already.

So just being able to finish school while i'm traveling and how that flexibility was really um just meet as possible. You know someone may appear as did finish Normal school and then they started competing. So there is different ways about IT.

Um either way, you can be highly competitive. You just have to work with what you got, you know. But I feel like travelling and surfing taught me more than you know school did.

And so IT just made me a soviet human and made me like, understand the world more. you. I saw a lot of different cultures and know I had to build my own independence really Young. And I just know I blossom a little Younger. I would say even people .

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The minimum invasive of your live system go to no B P H mads dot com. What did jeff? I mean, what they do to relationship with your mom? Did you get along with her when he was?

Yeah, you know, I think like most teenagers, we got along, but there was like a little sandpaper too. Yeah, he did the and in hindsight, I looked back and i'm like, you know, I have some teenage drivers going on, but for the most 呀， i think for the most partly, how to really awesome relationship. And my parents would take turns troubling with me. So, you know, we lived in hoi Price, the livings really high, and they're just barely escaping by, but they still .

gave me so much chase.

Yeah, we lived on the outer island too. So we're always inter island hopping. And then once we started to traveling more internationally, IT was just a lot by, thankfully, like I was serving so well and I had I started supporting myself around age sixteen financially. So I was traveling um under my own dollar at that point but my parents would come along for the ride with me. Sometimes think sometimes they're pitching and but uh yeah I just kind of started Young for me.

Different childhood.

Yes, very different. And I think to being a professional athlete, you learn diligence and ownership over your life. You have to push yourself.

You have to be a self motivated. You have to, you know, really work hard at your sport. And nobody else is gonna IT for you. And so I learned that really Young, and that has served me in so many different ways throughout my life.

Are you going to home school .

your children? yeah. So were in the early stage of home schooling. And it's a beast.

You think I think that is.

but I also think we make IT more obese than we need to be.

And can you just I mean think a lot of people um well, certainly age kids are ground sort of think probably should have done that. We think about IT should done. But now with, you know, the sort of obvious evil going on in government schools, in private schools, I think a lot of people would like to home school.

I mean.

how hard is that? What is that? What is that?

The of home schol by millions and lions, more americans, home schooling. So it's really cool is there is a lot of resources and tools and information to make IT more possible. And I think a lot of people get overlooked at the thought of home school because you think of traditional school, which is seven hours a day, but a lot of that time is wasted time that isn't actually learning or educating. And so taking the model in changing IT to be lesson two hours a day and chances are they're learning more than they would in a school day.

plus there are wait less than two hours a day.

Yes, yeah you don't need to hold out of time to accomplish a lot of your educating um in each day.

And so then why we sending kids to school all day?

I I mean, that's a big question.

right? IT.

You know I I think it's primarily the financial system. You you bring you back to the financial system and IT is a lot harder to survive on one income. Now fast word in this damage, it's it's, you know, my parents made IT work and that my mom was working.

So there was a little passin th or I will go see my friend if my mom was working in night. And so I just remember like SHE worked the restaurant industry, both my parents were in the restaurant industry. So they're a very like simple life, like not a high income just barely getting by, but they did show that you can home school on a lower income and still do a whole life. And so I think seeing them worked hard, red was really inspiring for me because I just saw them dedicate a lot to me, but also work really hard. And I think a lot of people are overarm at the thought of home school because you know parenting in itself is pretty .

hard um .

but I wonder why it's become so hard for us. Like for me, I ve had to unpack a lot of like my habits or you know things that i'm not necessarily proud of. Like you know, I had a season where I was really like short temper and like I had to work through some health things to get on to the other side of that and like support myself to Better mother mind children.

And I look back on that season and I hate that version of myself. Like, I am forgiving of her. But I like, why was I? Like, I was just like, really like, you know, I think women tend to be more emotional and and they are .

hard on themselves.

Yeah, I look back on that season and I realize that I was more than just being a woman. Like I wasn't being supported. Nutrition, sleep was really bad.

There is a few things going on where I was like just high stress. And I was very like, easily angered, and I had to really like work on my nutrition and my lifestyle habits. Like I stop watching T V at night, like sometimes you know about one.

I just like wine down. And I stopped ed doing that. And I was just focused on getting to bad sooner, making sure i'm eating enough in the day, getting enough protein and carbs throughout the day, and just make some health shifts that really like change who I was like, i'm way more patient now.

I'm way more like I can hold the needs of my children and their emotions because child are more like they're not as emotionally stable. And I really think that we help them stabilize by how we are. Yes, you know, a lot of people are just struggling to rising home when their time having a full back time.

It's like the having a tantrum with the child, yes, but we need to do the opposite. We need to like hold steady while they're having their tantrum and like help them work through that. And so yeah, mothering taught me a lie and has chAllenged me in where is no other role in life has chAllenged me and but i'm so grateful for that because it's sharpened me. It's mean me, you know, really have to dig deeper and like work through my issues and work through my chAllenges that where some some of them were probably learn too, like my mom's, my my parents are amazing, but I still like had some learned habits that weren't great, that I needed to like unlearned and like reform and currently still working through some of them. But you know, for the most part, I can look back on the season not wasn't so good and i'm so grateful that I was willing to adopt and chAllenge myself and look for a helpin, educate myself and dive in the health and like being an advocate for myself, because at one of the day, nobody else was gonna that for me.

And fast ford even too like the influence I have in my household and like helping my husband to be healthier in helping him to um take ownership in that area, as like the leader of our household um and now i'm like just the alignment that we have as a family, as a married couple, like continually working through the different little chAllenges along the way were a unit and as human and I as the like leaders, we're leading our children. And I think that, you know, we look through some of the chAllenges we've had along the way and our children are watching this and we're literally there are all models and and we're shaping the next generation. And so there's a lot of weight that comes with that.

And I feel like society has let go of that in a sense of we're just we're going to school and we're going to sports and we're just trying to get by and there's lack of intentionality in the household. And so I think I have a heart to not only work with teenager is specifically in america, helped nothing through their future Better, but now like seeing the influence thought, you know, the family has in society is so important. And so going back to, like the foundation of the family has and wife, and what does that relationship look like and how can you, you know, work through your chAllenges together and overcome together so that you grow closer together as you go through life rather than growing apart yeah just seeing the way society is now, like they talk on the family and they talk on Young people and there um their gender so to say like the way social media has a role in society. There is a lot that's not good and that we have to like think through and be intentional about. And so yeah.

there's you say there's a lack of of intentional behavior intentionality in the household.

What what do you mean? I feel kind of like what I would want to word IT is maybe it's just a passiveness like we're just kind of being passive about things and we're letting things happen verses like using how we see things happen in the household. We're just being passive and letting our children grow up, letting them see and learn whatever they can learn.

Now in society, you know, children are given ipad and iphone super Young, and they are instantly being like told a lot of different compelling things that aren't necessarily filled with truth. And so I think as a all as a mom and you know my husband as a father, you know we're thinking through that because our children are still Young, but are not going to be a teenager, you know, a few years, and like life's gonna change. And so how can we be protective and not just be passive in his life, but really like mental him and speaking in to his life in, you know, help him find his career path, so to say, and help him to become A A brave and leading Young man, even if his nature isn't necessarily a leader actually are all this is a natural leader. But i'm just saying, like we will look at our other boys and maybe they won't be a natural born leaders, but they're gonna have to lead at some point and still equipped them until lead and like showing them the way more than just by example, but really like coming alongside of them in helping them find their way until they truly are ready to spread their wings and then letting them know that the phone is always there and like the arms are always open.

So so you said that um of you you got three boys and one daughter. Your oldest son is a natural leader is um but that all your boys you're onna have to be leaders. What what did you mean and how would you train them to be leaders?

Yeah you know I just think of the god of beauty of marriage and harmony and um that relationship and when done right like the man is meant to be the leader yes. And I feel I think that in society, you know with the current culture, especially in america, a lot of that spin flipped upside down and disregarded and it's not serving society.

How is that working? Flipping that upside down.

Like this, the woman is maybe maybe she's not overtly leading the household, but maybe she's manipulating the household or maybe she's living in the same household but doing her own thing and it's just kind of like two separate lives together, but like she's doing her own thing and not really necessarily following a lead or maybe it's simply that the husband isn't leading and he's being passive and that is affecting the household in ways that maybe the husband in life don't really realize and it's harmful and IT doesn't serve the household and it's hard to recognize IT at first but at some point I will back e yeah I think that's partially why there are so many broken marriages now.

But there's so much we could impact there, right? There is so much to society that um is broken and lacking holness. And you know maybe the husband isn't being fairly or maybe the wife is being you know reacting in a way that's pushing him away and they're just so much impact. You know i'm not like a marriage expert .

identified the big ones though you actually IT sounds like you are matters because just .

described the many varieties .

of this function in a house of in the passive of husband is a much more common thing than .

I used to be yeah and entire because a lot of like what we know is what we've been or what we've know learn from our own parents. And so you could hardly blame the husband for for 尔 滨。 Now we they maybe never had someone come along side of them and truly show them the way in a healthy way. And or simply having conversations that are intentional around this area, like, hey, like these are things you're gonna a need to do as like the leader of your household, like just simple .

conversations that you were to give that what would you say?

Oh, I mean, from a mother's perspective is just knowing that like, hey, like you need to provide for your life mentally, emotionally and physically. And what that looks like is this this, this and this. And if she's reacting in certain ways, it's likely that you're not providing in one of those a one of those key points.

And so being willing to problem solve as like a husband and you, to be honest, like it's because i've felt this in may marriage and have been to work through that with my husband. And rather than like letting the the the rather than letting like the darkness charis apart and police apart, like our faith has grown us closer. We've had to work through some of our issues and just seeing him grow as the leader of our household um has been really beautiful and uh i'm just so grateful but I felt like .

the before and after so are you .

saying maybe make IT .

more general? Finally talking, do you think that 我 should encourage explicit， encourage her husband to be a leader.

a Better leader? I thin I mean yes for sure we should be encouraging like that is our role is to be encouraging and cheer on and support and you know be supportive um but I also to allow that to happen and sometimes you have to let go of things to but I also like there's a lot of conversation that comes with that and like talking about IT and working through IT. And um it's it's hard because this is such like a deep, deep issue.

And what is the core issue?

Yeah and husband .

and wife can get along. Then how does society continue for .

sure and that's why I talked like when I started opened up this little can awards, I was like talking about IT from their perspective of like society, why is there so much broken innocent's ety? We've lost her problem solving abilities. And instead, you know, having those deep, meaningful conversations that are essential over time, not having those conversations, then they just break apart. Okay.

so let's be specific. You've got four kids I have for kids, so I I know what it's like to have a know nine, three, one. And what IT really is is just kind of chaotic a lot going on.

A lot of people with immediate needs that must be made, a lot of filth that must be cleaned. And that is that a lot of noise, hard to have conversations with your spouse under those circumstances are living in. So how do you have a conversation like that, that heavy and that important? You've got all these other demands.

Yeah, it's super hard. And that's why, like I talked, I always bring up my health, the journey um it's not like I went super deep and not but realizing that I needed the energy you know throughout the whole day, not half of the day, the whole day, until I make IT to my bed at bad time yes, I need that energy to serve my family well and so i'm very passionate about health because I recognize that like the common meme is like, but first coffee but first like I need some me time to like survive this chaos but we're really not as resilient as we should be because our health isn't being supported in the way that IT needs to be to be the best mother, to be the best life, to be the best daughter um in life.

And so first supporting yourself so that you can um overcome the hardship that comes your way. And so for me, like you know, i'm not watching netflix or T V or anything at bad time. I'm going to bed or having a conversation with my husband. So it's like the relationship and my health first before any entertainment. And did you feel .

like just to put on this for second because I think it's a it's a big thing, particular for busy people people think kids it's like, all right, the second I go to bed, i'm just going to zone out in my own world yeah with that flick or whatever why is that bad?

What did you stop doing?

IT, I .

stopped because I felt like I needed to stop for my own like survival. Vo, like, you know, I do try to find, you know, a twenty thirty minute sometimes are in a half window for myself in the day, which that looks like surfing, or getting a little movement, or going on on the walk, or lying on my bad praying, or doing something just by myself for a quick minute. But there is like so much time that is wasted on whether it's crawling on social media or watching T V, it's a very consumerism and I want to create and I want to build and um make beautiful and to me, consuming doesn't allow for that as much you know when I am consuming, essentially not creating. And so I knew would be worth .

asking you that question because that's a wonderful answer. What i'm consuming i'm not created yes.

And so for me, you know we always want to justify our actions. Um every now then I like to sit down and watch alone. And it's usually with my husband and sometimes with my children like that.

The one T V show we watch lily in the last year um but otherwise i'm not consuming and you know I am on social media, but I tried to like keep tobes on that and not let IT like over take my life. I IT typically have a on a separate device. lately.

I have IT because I broke my old device phone, but I I had to move IT off my main phone device because I was, like, needed to control that time, so to say, span, like not randomly screwing ling when I didn't necessarily want to you kind of putting some boundaries there because yeah became like a easy reflux to like kill time in space. And so I I moved IT to a separate device. And that was a game changer for me.

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one low cost with over twenty five million windows covering line. Sot com is the number one online retailer, or of custom window coverings, up to fifty percent five plus door buster. In the free professional member right now, I plan reichard. So IT sounds like you when you said household are not intentional in the way that they make decisions live.

yeah, it's almost like we're more reactive to life rather than proactive.

So reacting to what comes our way and just kind of reacting to the time and just doing what we have to do to kind of get by versus like planning and being proactive and saying no to certain things and think, you know like choosing what comes in the household and how we use our time and how we converse with one another and you know I think of like the marriage is the foundation of the household and so being proactive in not relationship and like really working for that rather than letting time kind of um turn IT into this passive relationship. Not eventually fixes out because we were proactive. And so yeah, i'd be fine if I was here. He could speak to that in his own sense, and I am grateful to god for him every single day. And we've had our own journey of like growing and learning and becoming more proactive and like working through our chAllenges.

One thing struck by is you, you, you keep coming back to time, how you spend time. And when you said that home school schooling can be done, a child can be educated to at least the standard of a public in two hours.

And then he said, but for most parents, just like seven kings to school, take on the sports, there's like a whole kind of program that family sign up for that they have no control over at all yeah the mary may not be good for their children and they just react to IT. But you're instead figuring out how to spend you know the other twenty two hours a day with your kids. It's it's a big change from the way .

most people live. Yeah IT is a big change. And I I think it's because, you know, I was like the last generation to not have social media for most of my childhood. So I remember I got an instagram about when I was fifteen, and I had this season where I was highly addicted to I would be with all my friends, and I would like randomly start scaling and then I would try to show them stuff in their lake. We're having fun together like we don't need that.

And so I was the last generation, the lake I grew up diving into the ocean and swimming with turtles and going everything and plane kick the can in the yard and um filming little movies on a camp quarter that we're like gory and we put catch up on my left darm ment like we were truly children like filming horror movies in our backyard because I was hilarious and funny like there's being really creative and now I look at this generation and you'll be driving and you'll see on the side of the road hungover, looking at devices, waiting for their school bus, like not full of life, like not full of joy and beauty and passion and creativity, but rather being sent into this society round that is just passive. It's uh, being entertained. It's being consumers stick. It's just lacking this beauty in life that I really like. I look back on my childhood and I love my childhood, know I did grow up with amazing parents that, you know they devoted a .

lot of time as for being attacked by a shark and losing your arms in your childhood and how your children best IT was just, yeah, I was so amazing.

And you know this, the loss of the ARM was just like a little speed bump in the road, like I continued to have like an amazing childhood after I lost. And so now i'm looking at this gene.

Yes, I do mean .

that I loved my childhood. Even the the hardship that I face like IT created me to be an overcomer, to be in an adapter, to be someone who has to work through a chAllenge. And I did figure out, I would say that there always things we have to park at some point but yeah, and now being fast for being a mom and i'm like looking at this generation to so vastly different, I will say, like I did watch my I would leave my house at like eight in the morning to go serve.

My brothers were gamers, so I would leave the house and I go do a bunch of different things and then I come back like eight hours later and like my brothers hadn't left their spot on the couch. And that also had a huge impact on me. I was like, what are you guys doing? You literally haven't left the couch for, like, eat our street.

And I hated seeing that, I think being like a nature lover and someone who like grew up in nature and like found my creativity and waves. Granted, both my brothers were great, uh, ocean men as well. They're really, really, really talented on waves. So IT wasn't like they were so stuck to the gaming that they didn't go serve. But I saw this like side that I just didn't like and I was like, there's no way i'm allowing that in my household that I grew up oh as i'm raising my children because I want them to be creating and um you know I want them to just be super healthy. I think too like I have like a unique perspective of being an uh former professional athlete, really have been to push IT physically and mentally and like knowing that I had to support that nutritionally and just through various avenues of health, I now bring them to my household. I am like if there is one area in your life as a parent to not be passive, it's like, well, actually I don't think I can narrow up down to one thing but it's like your faith and health like at least give your children those two things because otherwise society will eat them up and there's so much junk out .

there that a slug listing. To you, i've never played a video again, but I have rested a lot of my life now that I think and I think of IT, i'm sorry, I have but let just stop at those who thinks you if you the two things you said you can give a child or four children or faith and health so let's just start with faith. How do you do that?

Well I guess you have to go on the journey yourself um first you have to be already to know what you believe um you know my parents encouraged me to know god at a Young age in the Christian vee I mentioned earlier, after I lost my ARM, I had a piece that I believe only god could have brought like through that season even though I felt like and upside down and the me and am a very rare human to have that circumstances, even in the chaos.

I had a sense of piece that god was with me and he was not onna. Leave my side and I don't think that he ever did like the way I worked through that season was so beautiful and so full of a confidence that I believe only god could have, right? And I am thankful that, you know, my mom, that weren't perfect, but they were there for me.

My mom would read the songs and proverb in particular, because it's very inviting. I like the proverb IT impacts the wisdom of wide. Like there's thirty one proverbs.

You all could read one proverb a day, and that would be less than five minutes of your day. Could you take five minutes of your day to, like, read god's word? I think so.

And they're amazing. And they, even if you .

don't believe .

that .

atis could read the problem, and income proved my did read with me, he would read that and praying with me at bedtime. And that was such a blessing. And I think that helped spout my own faith, my own child, dc faith, that eventually grew into its own as I grew into an adult.

And now I want to give my children that so that if they have something like a shark attack in their life, they're gonna a be able to work through that with her, without mama, like they'll be able to survive the chAllenges of this world. They'll be able to see through the lives that are being on a daily basis in our society. They'll be able to see through the lives that aren't gonna serve of them in their life. And I believe that thoughts and god's word first and foremost and so for me, IT looks like playing with my dren at time and throughout day it's reading about and it's encouraging their faith and talking through philosophical ideas that at then in the day you can look to god's worried and know what is truth um and so I forget your original question but health yeah and then .

two just like paying .

for my children because at the day it's not me who does serve is god god will give you that faith he will speak in in your life and so to me the most important thing is to read god's word because that is the thing that will sharpen them and speaking into their life and it's ultimately the lord says that that is his word and when we hear his word, that can work and move in our hearts and minds and so and then when IT comes to health, like just living out a healthy, healthy lifestyle, teaching them what is good and what is not good, my children know that like we're not eating red die because it's not good for us. So they're choosing to do that at six and nine already and they know that we still have a treats. So it's not like they're so deprived that like, oh, G I know because I have this opportunity .

to red die five and my ignorance, what's red die five?

You know the red die that they put in food, but it's not really like food. And it's like highly talk seg deep dive, that talker come to know .

sounds bad though. But like if you you .

go to the go SHE sards down like majority, the grocery store is not even things we should be consuming. And I know a lot of people are like, well, that's expensive. You know, to a certain extent, IT is gonna take a little more investment to bring a real food into your house. But when you educate yourselves and start to understand why, IT becomes an easier decision and there's a lot of things you can do, there are more affordable to just eat real food. Basically.

what do you serve your kids and not?

The cool thing is, i'm the one with the wallet. So I get to bring what IT is in the house, my husband and I, of course, and he does half the girl e shopping. Whoever just is out there picking .

up most money in every households they spent by the woman. He made the decision.

yes, yes, yes. So you know, i'm the one that choosing what comes under the house. So it's easy to make the household healthy because i'm not gonna buy the junk that serve them in their health in the long run.

Um so for example, of for breakfast will have craps, pancakes, waffles or like actos. And i'm like blending in the blender and i'm putting the ingredients in there and it's all wholesome ingredients and like lots of good eggs. Eggs are such a great way to start your day.

My children are fairly like mentally stable. And I think it's because we eat really god like we eat clean, healthy foods and they're not like you know very ruler costly in their mental stability. And so i'm seeing IT play out in a real time like wow, there are really healthy children because .

our super levels aren't spiking .

and crashing in time. And then you know it's not even that we don't need sugar. We're just making sure we're getting enough proteins to baLance out that glue close. So as long as you're balancing out your diet, you're going to be OK if you have a little treat here in there.

But there are a few few things we avoid like red divides, artificial ingredients, um seed a few other things that just aren't really like real foods and so we just keep IT whole sum and real. We eat a lot of you like Normal meals but just the healthy version of IT and none of the junk process sending you we'll stop shop IT like costco, her example, because that's like the one of the only grocery stories we have on our island. And ninety percent of what's in there we're not bringing home. So we're choosing to find the good stuff that .

is wholesome .

and a luo. We might have a little rope bear here.

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Um and then what's your view on kids being outside?

Oh, I mean, we have a really unique life growing up in all there in nature all the time. And I will see if you're struggling parenting. It's proudly because you just need to make sure more like anything feel kind of stressed, overwhelmed motherhood and like were going to the beach. We're going to nature. We're getting do the house and intelligent, just this place where they can be creative and um just be around other guy and so I found that like I definitely thus a mother and nature so trying to like find those thriving location so that we can um thrive in life.

Um how much content do you have with your larger family?

Yes, I mean we have such a beautiful set up um my apparently they live on the same property as us and my both my older brother is live with an attempt drive and so I got all my news and Matthews, my brothers and we have about twelve thirteen grandkids and my parents and so it's just .

like all live yeah we're all .

like within ten minute drive of each other. So it's really easy to get together and like help each other, read each other as children. And my mom is a super grama. She's so supportive and like is truly there for I don't like you know if I am having a rough season and motherhood which they come and go part of life like my mom's there he is giving me a bias and I am asking her for a bias. How do I get through this on the rare occasion? Please take the children before I lose my mind um which isn't very often because I have a great relationship, my children and I am you so it's not like I need all the time IT is just a blessing to have that.

So just for perspective because you're famous, I people might think, well well, you know that you can live that way when you're really rich but um having just been in why recently I was reminded that I think the most expensive state is one of the harder places to live um and IT doesn't sound .

like your family's bridge no I mean we make this money and we are unique situation. But I grew up with five of my best friends from childhood born diners in haie. They are now married and have children, and almost all of them are home. And they're living a Normal, very Normal life. And they're getting by and they're choosing to live a life style that is different, but they are n anyone you know unique out.

So it's achieve can .

choose to live a certain lifestyle, you know. And I think the common thing in amErica too is like we want to live above our means. So figure out what is your means and are you living within your means, and what adaptations can you make so that you could make your dreams come true if you have certain dreams, so to say.

And if you choose to not go down that route, at least being an intentional at the time that you do have your with your children. So when they come home from school, having night energy and not mental capability to be intentional to give them eye contact, to give them that quality time, I feel like specifically from junior high or high school, it's like the most pivotal years. Besides obviously childhoods pretty pivotal um and their world views are pretty formed.

I'm very Young, but there these pivotal years where parents get very little time with their children because they're in school, they are in sports, then they come home and have homework and random chores maybe, and the parents barely good that time with their children. And so obviously my children are in those years, but i'm thinking about those years is and how i'm gonna approach IT. And I don't want you to be monday or unintentional like I want my husband to have quality time with his son so that his sons have a good grasp on the world than what they're getting themselves into as they become adult in now. And so what do you think .

they are getting themselves into? They become adult? No, really. I mean, you ve got three boys and yeah.

I mean, there's a lot out there, but I I hope that you'll, you know, find a wife pretty Young and be good leaders of their household. And I want to encourage them and like, help them find their way so that they can afford to be a husband and a provider. So working with them, they'd figure out what their talents are and like what sort of work they could do to survive, not just survive but survive um and to say no to the temptations of the world and to respect women and to you know choose a life that is honourable and just and not just go with the flow of like what society is currently.

And I think as a male in particular, there's a lot of temptation around women and pornography and none of that really serves society IT becomes so Normalized you know, you look, you know, I grew up in hawaii, like it's the most uncovered area of the world, like people are literally walking around in in close to nothing on a regular basis in. But I feel like now Young men in particular, it's like their social media. And just there so many dark holes they can get caught up in and even gaming like I am really against gaming.

I don't have anyone really talked about that publicly, but there is no way i'm bringing that into my household because I want my boys creating, becoming like building up their skills and life. If like, I want them to have, you know, mentor under a plumber, electrician like mechanic, have these basic skills so that they are not completely helpless as when they, you know start living on their own like just basic life skills that instead they could be gaming and where's not gonna get them. And then when they have to start living a real life, and they ran in a chAllenge, what are they? They onna do.

Are they gonna problem solve? Are they gonna go zone out in gaming? There's a lot of husbands that aren't showing up because they're busy gaming or pornography. And so equipped our boys to say no and to say yes to the good and beautiful things that they could be doing in life and to learn how to provide and serve and protect.

You've got such an interesting way of presenting what you think see, you have a very gentle effect and commonly back. But what you're saying is like really radical as compared to when I think every word you have that is true. Just think the record. But it's so different. It's so different. You live on an outer island in the are the toy stayed out of fifty in pretty rare state, I think um so maybe don't know how radical what do you have a sense of how different how you live is from how many other people live?

I mean, i've started to realized that in raising children, like trying to find good friends for my children, and just like some of the boundaries that we setting on behalf of our children and trying to like, you know what, who can they play with, what households are good for them to be in. And it's IT. I think it's going to a get even harder .

in the teenage. So IT ounds like you think .

you have the right to make in a hundred, like I think that if I didn't lead, guide and protect them, like nobody else will.

Yes, no, I mean, I couldn't get more and don't .

have an understanding that the brain isn't fully developed until two and five for meals. I think that is somewhere around there. Um so why would you like hold back, protecting them and helping serve and guide and lead them in a healthy direction? I think of myself is super healthy. And so of course, i'm gonna like help lead and guide them along the way and not like just let them hopefully .

flowed out there and figured that out.

That is a strategy for any, but even to the extent of he invited see what I what your and year uncle is saying, ask questions and don't be so passive that everything moment data says is you know the end of sale so to the extent of like, yes, you respect to your mother and father, but you're still like to ask questions and have your own opinion.

But you know, I do see IT in my nine year old how much he looks up to his dad and me and how he's willing to like he knows that when mama says, like doni red die five, it's because he loves him and she's protecting her from eating these neural talk sins that will give him A D H. D. And he doesn't have that currently.

So we don't want him to get that. But he could have IT if you keep teeing those over and over and over again. And so he trusts me and that I explain why i'm not just like, no, you can't have that.

I explain why you can't have that and why I don't want him. And you know if he ate at once or twice a year, i'm not making a huge deal out of IT. I'm just like, hey, like we're not bringing that into our household. delete.

Have you got to navigate marjane?

H, I mean, for me, IT was actually a really easy one to navia as a teenager because I think that the way might have talked about that. And I even in the public school, was like, I was highly athletic driven. And so I could see that he was a common theme that people lost their drive in life with marijuana particular.

And then even i've had a daughter mental ship program, and whatever calls us, focus on drugs. And the coolest thing is will show the girls the brain without marijuana and alcohol and the brain with, and they look very different, like it's very noticeable how healthier, like we had a brain specialist kind of explain the differences, and you could see IT with your own eye. And so that was really cool to me as an add, whose chosen not to like do marion or anything like that, but just talking about IT from my perspective of a health.

So that's why, you know I said earlier, like encouraging our children and faith and understanding health is so important. And talking about, like I talk about, hey, you know, if you go through a chAllenging season in your life, do you want go to alcohol, or do you want to a go to god? Like, what's gonna be your strength?

What's gone to serve you and your family is alcohol gonna serve your family or is god like what's gonna a leave you forward and help overcome and adopt persever through the chAllenges that will inevitable come away? Um certainly not alcohol and the drugs which a lot of society is going to that because we essentially aren't happy with our life or we're looking for an outlet that um some of the pain. And so you know working with our children to face their hardship and to work through their pain and to have a plan for when that comes, if they don't have any of that prior to.

Live in the household, like having a good plan. Like what are you going to do when you face hardship? Are you going to go to these outlets? Are you gonna come back to mom and dad or someone who's are respectable in your life to help you work through IT? Because there certainly been seasons in my life where, like, why did IT I go to someone to help me through that? And I tried to navigate by myself, and I was IT socked, and IT was hard, and I was awful. And i'm like why I didn't I ask for help and um I just like that's not what I want for my children. I want them to go and ask someone for help whether it's me or not like that's OK, but I hope it's me and if it's not me, like they are gone to have a few other people in their life that would be like this would be a great person if you don't for some reason don't feel comfortable talking me, go to this person and like have them spend time with that person in their um late ten years so that they have a relationship that's you know encouraging.

What do you think that is pretty common human experience. But people have problems that they probably sort out quickly if they articulated them in front of somebody else, but they don't. why?

Oh my god, I feel like there's a lot of reasons why. And I think you know that's why in earlier in our conversation and I talked about working through some of my issues and motherhood is because, you know I think sometimes we get closed in life or we are open to teaching or wisdom or you know respecting our elders, it's almost like there's this and talked about level of being where and we have pride and we just think we can do IT ourselves.

And I feel like that's almost growing even more. And now a social media because they are like, or I can just goole what to do yeah rather than ask, uh, someone are respectable in your life. Like, hey, like do you think this is a good life decision? Like should I go down this room? Um so for me and I am kinds going about this answer in a long way, but i'm now asking three different people for advice. If I have something that feels overwhelming or chAllenging, I am being like going to the three different people in trying to see if I will align for them if they are advised me will alive or you know, like just having someone respectable to speak in my life over a chAllenging subjects.

I feel like I am now you don't know every answer to every question.

yeah. And you know if IT feels like something really hard, just not being afraid to ask for hell. And you know maybe there is this level of like 咋 distancing and junior high and high school where like you're almost like separating from your parents too early， yes. And then you go off to college and adult life and you I really have that relationship with my mom for help or we didn't work through some of our issues as in that relationship through the high school years. And so there's not that level of like you can come to me like i'm here for you and all like except you no matter what the chAllenge is. And so trying to keep that relationship open, just communicated so that when the real chAllenges come, there is a openness and like i'm they'll be willing dose for help and obviously, there are different characters and um you know I can see already like china raise the different characters in my children and like they're very different and it's going to a require like some problem solving or adopt ability to their different um you know personality and character .

and so so yeah yeah because there are different. So um you said you have a menorca gram. What you're dealing with Young people who are not your children? yeah. What do you notice about them? what?

yeah. So I ve always just had a hurt for teenage girls. And maybe it's because of what I face that such a Young age, like when I lost my, I was thirteen years old and that pivotal season going into those teenagers.

But then there was this one woman who we'd pick up my girlfriends and I and speaking in to our lives SHE would mentor us and encourage us in relationships in particular SHE like like equipped us to um enter into the dating realm and to look for a husband in a healthy way. And this woman wasn't like super appealing, so to say like I would say the fact that you like brought chocolate rought chocolate and like brought us to the beach was like the ler so to say show up. And like, even if he wasn't like super cool, you know, like as a teenager, you looking for those cool people to hang out with SHE wasn't like super cool.

But he likes spoke and in her lives. And he made the most of what he had. And SHE made such an impact in my life. And so I just feel like i've been given a unique platform to speak in the Young people's lives. And I am very passionate about like social media as well.

Like the big thing I noticed is the girls who you working with girls between like nine, eight and there are along side of their mothers, but the girls are highly active on social media like you can just tell right away, like they dress more promise to us. They're very aware of their being um you know they're very like aware of just how they look and how they Carry themselves. And it's almost like they've got something to prove. They're trying to be cool or like you know be accepted in a certain way. And I just I really just notice of us difference in the girls that are active on social media, the girls that are not and you know either way.

they're very lovable .

who's peer definitely the girls that are not active on social media, they have a lot less issues. And um yeah it's definitely really interesting. And there been extreme cases where we've had some girls who are really struggling in their life and their moms, like we've IT on everything we've done counselling.

We've done like drugs to try to like calm them down or like help them not be depressed. And I just not working. And so they're coming into this program leg and is just like try that you never know. And I think there is just something about the community element and like talking about the truth in the chAllenges of the world.

We're talking about all these different topics, dating, drugs, conflict resolution, faith um all the different topics that i'm like naturally passionate about and even like health and stuff and like just trying to equip the girls but at the other day, like the Young girls might be really excited to see bathin like as their mentor but the goal is not me, it's their mom so your mom coming in and doing IT with their daughter and it's about that mother daughter relationship because I remind the girls and like, hey, girls, like, i'm not gonna be there for you when the going gets rough. But your mom is like, she's the one that will die for you and I do whatever IT takes to be there for you in your tough seasons. And so maybe you don't see I D I ve with her on everything and maybe of a little sandpaper of a relationship, but your mom loves you so much.

And so it's just kind of about bringing back that family unit and making that be the focal point of the mentorship um experience program. And so it's just been, yeah, it's really interesting though, park lake, the difference in the children who are being exposed a lot more and then the ones who are not and to me, IT feels a little devastating because i'm like, I such a good childhood like you girl should be like adventuring and nature and filming like cute, little like funny movie is on a little camp quarter and instead we got like tiktok dancing and leg to his lake. Unless media scrolling ling in T V watching and you know I I don't want to be so negative because I know there is beautiful moments in everyone's life's.

But um I just feel like there's so much more to be hard when we're creating and um being artistic and letting our strength and talents be used and um pursuing like the good and beautiful things in life and having like really open like loving relationships and quality to him. One thing i'm working with my children is like teaching them, like I try to look in their eyes, like i've met a lot of people and it's like we almost are losing eye contact, like something and simple as that, like trying to look people and ee and starting in your own household. Like once you start to be aware of IT, you're like whole like they haven't looked me in the eye today and so you have to bet, like I have to lead my children to be able to look me in the eye.

And so like making sure not so busy that I can't like slow down and like check them out and give them the ire contact that they are quality time. So one thing I love to do with my six year in particular, he's super sweet, but he has like this interesting personality that you know, that feels a little harder to get through to. And so one thing I like to do with him and play rummy cards, so he's only sex and he's doing so amazing like he beats me all the time at ramming and like he will be like calculating how much points he has versus how much points I have throughout the game.

And like this is like one way that I like to connect with him that was really sweet and there's nothing else going on. I mean, obviously, there's little busy trying to steal the cards. But for the most par, it's just him, me having this moment.

not staying during the ames.

no phone set aside and I just like him and I am my six year old actually can play cards really well and like he's doing math at the same time, but is like connecting with mom.

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how? Where are your views where you live?

I mean, that's interesting. Yeah I think it's fairly are um you know like one thing, for example, like my children are looking out the window when we drive. So dogs becoming more and more rarely.

Children don't share out the window. They don't have that moment to be bored and like eyes groups during out the window, looking up the clouds, like and like looking for dead animals on the side of the road. You know, this was like the life I had.

I like, boys can do the same. I'm not giving them my phone and take them drive even if they're being a little fussy. why?

Like just not an option. Like I don't allow that. And so well, turn on stories. I'll let them a pitch in. Sometimes they get to pick the music. So like my sex there wants country music or he wants piano, that is top two choices.

And so i'll give them ownership sometimes like or take turns with sometimes really listening to mom music, sometimes we're listening to baby music of the baby is fusing and then sometimes we're listening to like classical piano or um a on the podcast. I do your book and so that's an example of like, yeah, we're using technology but we're not like giving our phones to like push our children, so to say. And it's interesting because IT doesn't really ever across my mind to need you like quiet my children with a device. Like because we just have things established and their early, you know, doing there.

How do you handle long flights?

Oh, we add a much movie is on long, their plane rides and their stock and their leg getting their movie time. But then like a makes them look ford of traveling. And I feel cave that because it's like we're not consuming all the time and it's not like the twenty of the movie the'd watch this this week.

Dear neighbor, should you should have five friends from child to do all kind of one up looking like you?

Yeah I mean, you are very similar, but we're all kind of scattered throughout the islands. Sometimes we'll meet up at the beach, but we don't see each other, others much as we like.

But are do you stick out in your community?

I think I do, but also I would say a lot of people in how I are spending like we live to live, we don't work to live like we're all going to the beach as soon as we're not working. Everyone's like check in the serve forecasts and scheduling their life around this, the forecasts. I mean, if they can sometimes like you got to work when you've got to work. But I feel like people and how I am my friend actually, brother, this after another day, like we very much so live to live and we're going to like, enjoy the sunset and like, you know get out in nature because it's so easy to ask us out there um but there is also people live .

in beautiful places and never out .

yeah true that's probably true. Yeah so I don't know. I try not to like pretention too .

much to everyone yeah I know .

like it's very like low key. I mean, I would say how I has a lot of pocket of lake, you know people living outside of the box.

how yeah bit here. I mean, I was Christian .

and reviewed. I feel like that's an interesting and IT feels like it's changing right now with like kind of this a new world religion of like the pride L G T Q plus whatever .

movement. You said the acronis wrong and i'm glad yeah .

yeah yeah so you but I feel like there's like this new surgeons of a new religion and it's almost like anti religion. So IT doesn't matter what your religion is, it's like against all the religion. So to say unless the religion tends to be a little more like a like relax, so to say um it's definitely anti Christian.

And I think because IT feels a talked by Christianity, because there is moral ground, and Christianity, like the bible says, that shall not lie. And then IT has all the other ten commandments. And when you look at someone's life who maybe lives more in that fashion, they bring a lot less pain into the world you know when you're lying, killing, stealing, like that's not good for the world yeah and so like they're so much beauty within IT.

But people are rejecting IT because there's a few of the things like you should should be 非法 before you're even married， you should be faithful and that society does not want to be faithful. And so that is uh is a IT feels unachievable and unapproached because society is Normalized being unfaithful. And so people feel defensive when they feel like they are being told what to do.

Yes, but yeah, someone who lives out a fateful life is such a blessing, right? They like, you know, when you meet a married couple, been married fifty years, you're like that is incredible. Like that so beautiful.

And they've been faithful and they've chosen to love and serve whoever they committed their life to their spouse. And not is such a blessing in society. And it's likely that their children are more stable and healthy and society. And so I do SAT so was stuck on that, like i'm leg when I meet the first couple that's been married fifty years and I give me advice, tell me like what should I do? Like how can I achieve what you achieve.

do you know and what do they say?

I mean the answers are very different but um i'm just always willing us them for I can't think of any any big ones. I can think .

of any you can give advice. You married fifty years but be a successful marriage.

We're at a eleven years and I say the biggest thing in our relationship is truly the Grace of god and looking to guide to be the authoring finisher of our faith to understand that, like, his Grace is sufficient for me. And when I understand that, then I know his Grace is sufficient for my husband. And if god is sufficient for my husband, that then leads me to be gracious on my husband and vice ever help on me.

And that is the foundation of a healthy marriage. And no matter what you're going to go through, like how hard this seasons may be, you're gonna be a little to work through IT. Because your foundation is not in yourself, in your ability to be the perfect husband or wife, but your foundation is in the ability to trust in god, or not even the ability but to allow god to work through your life. yes. And so i'll be my number one advice advice.

So you say that you see the rise of a global religion. Um are you ever confronted by people who believe in that religion?

yeah. I mean.

how do you how do you respond?

Yeah, it's interesting because I ve just been trained so I cannot Better understand IT. It's being promoted under the lands, the lens of being loving, right right, to be loving towards all those people, but to everyone around you regardless of their views. And so it's almost disregarding having an opinion or a world view or you know a belief system.

It's like this regarding having any kind of like moral foundation and that you have to love and be accepting of whatever they want to do regardless of how destructive IT may be. 嗯， and so you know to me like I think faithfulness is essential for a healthy society. And yet people don't want to embrace that.

They want to be free, so to say and like do whatever they want with whoever they want um at any point in time in their life and what they don't understand is is painful in the long run to not have a relationship that is stable and faithful and committed and enduring that is hard and that is painful and yeah society just wants to promote that as if it's a good like it's, you know do whatever makes you happy in the moment and so I the way I view is like to be unfair. Ful is not good. It's not healthy for uh uh strong society IT doesn't lead for you know confident children when their parents are you know breaking apart. And you know maybe you have ready, maybe you have already hit that point in life where you've split from your partner became unbearable. That was painful. And I wouldn't go so far as to say, like god's Grace is not sufficient for you, like his Grace can be sufficient for you no matter how awful things may be, and he can work in your children's lives so i'm not like saying, you know, but I just think that if society can strive to be faithful like that alone could slip society on its hard to be more beautiful and more um just fall of life and passion and purpose and you know I think most of society when they see if a married couple who are in good relations with one another fifty years later, like everyone's celebrating, like everyone's cheering that on and like in all of that because IT is hard and IT is hard to make IT that long. I think and it's early seen to be you know you look at the the divorce rates, so to say and it's it's super hard out there and people .

aren't making IT very far. Yes, that's probably harder than .

sticking together one run.

Yes, totally to tell me about brave books.

So I feel like the last few years has been crazy, starting with twenty twenty leg. I would say I was pretty passive when I came to like the world views, so to say, like I had my world views and I had things I wanted to live out in my own life. But I wasn't like hyper aware of, like what's going on in society.

And I went like, you you I can't overstay. I've been to where you live so I know how far a way .

you yeah and so then twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty one hit like all this craziness started happening and like you can kindly start to see through like what is actually going on here because I don't think it's as simple as .

a virus being not just a man wet market organically and no.

so so then you know I just started to realized like who I partner with and where I put my money matters. And as a professional athlete, like you're given all kinds of deals that you know could make you money, you know yeah yeah, but they are not necessarily like good things. You know like for example, i've had a professional career in surfing and I never took a deal with an energy drink because I just don't believe in those. And that was an area where I drew the line because I don't think I was healthy and it's not something I want to promote to anyone, let alone children who look up to me.

What if IT was mountain dew? barry? Blast.

no mountain dew berry best.

Okay, just what i'm trying to find your red lies.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, I do drink coffee, so I might not promote IT a coffee drink care there. You know but i'm promoting smoothes and i'm promoting like finding your fuel and energy and food and taking care of yourself and like just living a healthy lifestyle. But fast for twenty, twenty and all that chaos hits.

And i'm like where what are we promoting? And so I get this opportunity to I get brave books evening me being like he, you won't write children book with us and like, oh yeah, let's go about this company is standing a guns all out of the societal norms. And they're trying to build the family, they're trying to build up children to have solid identities to say no to the liars, the world to be aware of, like the chAllenges that they're gna face, uh, as they grow about life. And now i'm reading them to my children. I'm like, this is a rodez book ever to be a little read, my children to sleep.

And when you say for people, not for what you say, the rated book ever.

that's good ethics. So like, for example, on my favorite bread books besides my own. I mean, like I like my book, but i'm just not like that.

But it's about this little boy who has to save his sister, and he has still go on this crazy joy to find this icy flower and if he drops the little ice flower on her lips, so shall survive the the pokey that he stepped on that's going na poison her and so he's half ing like basically become a man and like save his little sister and it's like the sweet as little story and now my three year old like hung go fine a ice flower for my baby sister and it's like it's computing and his had like the life that he should live is to save the the Young woman in his life and to protect her and to um you know face his fears on her behalf and he goes on this like nearly journey and he's crying at one point and it's just this a little book. Uh I think he was called the the truth. No no IT wasn't the sa truth but that's another one that's really good too. But anyway, i'm like my agent, like here, you sure you in a partner with this company because once all the big corporation sort the company is see you partner with brave books, they are not likely going to partner with you as my jane. I am like, oh my gosh, I felt like I was like walking off a Cliff and I think I think I did walk off some sort of Cliff but like, I felt a good .

one a .

yeah and and then like, so I partner with read books. I wrote my books, surfing past fears, really sweet story, inspiring children to overcome their fears. And and then about nine months later, the world survey starts allowing males to compete in the female division. And I am the only one walking off that Cliff saying, no, like, this is not OK and we're not about to allow meals to against i'm not about to have meals competing against me willingly and that was a whole another just step of faith in that someone has got to say, no.

nobody else .

did literally. I don't think one female, maybe like a couple last known like kind of like not very little girls. I think there is a lot of women, not for IT, but the unfortunate thing was the world safely had all the athletes say, like are not allowed to say anything deemed to ogata or a negative towards the world league or we you will find you and disqualify you from competing.

So shut up.

And yeah and so that was like the the contract they had signed on the december prior to that year. And they literally get an email. They didn't even get a vocal warning like, hey, miles are now allowed to compete in the female vision as long as their hormones reach to the certain level.

And they didn't even get a warning. They just get a email in the in box and i'm like, oh, no way, this is not okay and i'm not for this. And I think I lost some major deals that year. I think, uh, I had had a deal on the table with ford and that never happened. And I think IT was around that time when I was like, no, i'm not for this and I like made a public seamen and and what .

kind of reaction did you get to that?

I would say he was mostly positive, like, but there was so nearly negative intertwined. But I feel like most of the I would people out of the wood works like stopping me in our local girls y story like thank you so much we're speaking up like we're so proud of you but there is also some really aggressive like i've liked this shark game on tiktok that like they're like we're team shark.

Yeah something like crazy is out there but you know whatever side of the spectrum you are, I feel like there's crazies in the mix of like either and like there's just extremist or hateful and harassing will say early things and but IT definitely was like an intensive, and I probably let IT like affect me more than I should, though I didn't look too much. I was, I kind, you can look of you. I'm not looking because I need to go to sleep tonight.

Good for you. Not looking is a huge style.

I know sometimes you just have to not look and. Yeah, you're be Better, much Better. Yeah and yeah so anyway, partnering with companies like brave books are now partners with public square. Like you can literally put your dollar where your values matter. And I think that really matter is like there is a team of amazing people trying to be build a parallel economy that isn't founded on these weird agendas and this .

division death.

just this earliness or this new world religion that there are trying to shut down children throats to make them like more confused than. And so brave books is inspiring family is to speak into their children's lives early on so that they can go into society and not be confused, not be uh hateful on themselves and you know reject their god given beauties, but to embrace their got given talents and the person that they've been formed to be.

And I feel like this new world religion is like, oh, just be one flow, whatever direction you want. And like IT really doesn't leads to happiness. IT leads to despair and darkness.

And you know, you can even look at the statistics and know that, you know some of these people that are choosing to amputate their body parts are not healthy and they're regarding their decisions and they're taking hormones that essentially make them get disease earlier on in life than they should. And i'm like we're cheering this on because they just feel like they wanted be different than they actually are. Like I have one ARM I would never wish out on anyone like why would you amputate perfectly good body parts just to look a certain way?

Like IT doesn't make sense to look and be a certain way and like to do such extreme measures. And yet society is like, let's go. Granted, I think after I spoke out against males in female sports, I think the majority of society like, no, they say OK, but they just might not be voicing .

their opinions. Did the survey change their position?

no. And I think ultimately, they trying to be accepted into the olympic rules. So they're following the olympic rules. So the olympics is choosing to allow our meals into female sports.

And so the world serving is just following their lead, so to say, because of joke yeah I mean, I would say the athletes are incredible and I would like highly I highly celebrate the athleticism and the hard work of these athletes. But the organization behind is definitely not serving the athletes to the best of its ability. And it's not looking at their realities of like a male computing against a female is is simply not fair and like should never be .

OK could not more so I wanted to end on something that we were talking about off camera that I thought was so cool and revealing what about social media and um my daughter could find you so he was showing me your social media last night. I don't actually have the APP against grand but SHE showing me this so cool and you saying this woman has the most beautiful children I i've ever said um so we're time out so you mean the sporting and you were saying what you just set on camera, which is that you really notice its effects on Young women and but you've chosen to put your own children in some of your pictures and videos for a very specific reason that I want you to explain because I thought that was just wonderful.

Yeah, I mean, i've gone back and forth on, like, do I share my family? Like on social media or not and I just from my perspective, like I want to inspire the next generation to embrace and look forward to motherhood. And there are people that I follow that make me like, just look forward to waking up to my children every day.

They have a really positive outlook on motherhood. They inspire me to be the best mother's mother I can be, and they're not hiding their family life, so to say. And so there is this like kind of baLance that like a lot of people will just refuse to show family.

But I really want inspire the next generation. And I think like so many people, i've gotten so many messages of, like, your family so beautiful, like, I want to be a mom someday and like that, to me, is like so encouraging. And I just want people to know that motherhood is a blessing and to be a mom is one of the greatest roles in life.

And I feel like there's a big movement that is against that right now. And it's you know there's a lot of mean around I just can't wait to go to bad, can't be to like silence, like children, like just kind of like frustrations over like motherhood. And I wanna just encourage women to know that mother hood such a blessing, and that children are, you know, like, that is the high of my day, I go to bed.

And even if I had an amazing day, aside from them, like they are my highlight, they are the thing that i'm thinking about when I go to bed. And i'm like, oh my gosh, even on the rough days and like there is always a sweet moment that I am like thinking about how my three year old came and gave me a big hug and kiss when I gave came back from surfing or something like that. And he was the highlight of my two hour window like IT wasn't the surfing by myself.

I was like the coming home and getting a big hugging and kiss from three year old. And so I hope inspire next generation. Motherhood is such a gift, and to look forward to that because it's such a blessing.

I won't even ask why anyone would want to deny people the greatest pleasure in life, but I just commend you for reminding the rest of us that this is the greatest of .

pleasure in life that is not such a blessing.

help. And thank you very much. Thanks for listen and stuck across some show. If you enjoy IT, you can go to talk to cross and that com to see everything that we have made the complete library, dr. Croson dc.