#FEGOLIFTING | Journey restarting my squat, sumo or conventional?, what ego lifting REALLY is
59:23 Share

What's up guys, it's Sam and Taylor, and we want you to put your shoes on, pop open that energy drink, and...

then it should have been and it got delayed when we got there so I was just in the air forever and the wi-fi didn't work so I couldn't text anybody that it got delayed and I think Sam and my family and everyone thought I was dead I was so scared the flight I'm like oh Sam I get in at 2 40 maybe delayed like an hour it's like two hours later and I haven't updated anyone on the fact that I'm

Not landed But my wi-fi wasn't working and I was like is the wi-fi not working for the whole plane and I look and the people Next to me are like most definitely watching movies on like the american airline and I was like oh And then I was like, maybe it'll work on my laptop. I opened my laptop. My laptop's dead And I was like this is the worst and someone was in my seat and I think they were like a kid I couldn't really Tell I don't know and they were like kind of sleeping and they were in the window seat and it was my seat And I didn't say anything. So you sat in the middle. I sat in the aisle on the aisle

If the person came and they were supposed to be the aisle, I would not have sat in the middle. But I was like, I think I can deal with the aisle. But I was just listening to a podcast because I had nothing to watch because I thought I was going to buy Wi-Fi and listen to a podcast and then watch Netflix. But the Wi-Fi didn't work. I was literally set. I literally didn't even text it. I was texting David and he texted me like, all right, love you, have a safe flight. And I texted him before that, like, oh, getting on, love you. But I didn't even answer because I was like, I'm going to buy Wi-Fi. I'm going to text him in five minutes. And I was like, God.

I left everyone hanging. I let it go back. My mom's like, oh, where are you? Like, did you land? It was so annoying. I thought I was going to come back, eat lunch, go to the gym. But instead I got back here at 6 p.m. And I'm doing this. Yeah. I hate flying back from Boston to Austin because it's like five hours and 40 minutes. So I hate it. But going home, no problem. But other than that, I just hate coming back. And you know what it is? Like if it like said the flight was going to be five hours or like four and a half. Yeah. I would have been like.

mentally prepared but when you think it's gonna be like two and a half and you don't start landing the plane and you've been on the plane for a long time that's when I was like are we for real yeah so terrible

I am very tired, but it's okay. We grinded. Yeah, we obviously both went home this week. I showed Mac off to my family. My family loved Mac. I don't even know if my family, like, actually listens to these podcasts. Hi, Mom. Hi, Dad. But my dad was obsessed with Macro. But the main reason I was really excited about my dog coming home or Macro coming home was for Bauer and Ryder, the other dogs. They got along so well. They were so gentle with him. You know, when, like,

Well, actually, I don't know if you know, but if anybody listening knows big dogs like they have very big, sharp teeth. But like they were grabbing him so gentle by the mouth and like trying to like carry him like a little puppy. And I was like, I was like, he's a little bit too big to be carrying by the mouth. But like it was still so cute and they were being so delicate. But then it came, I think, two days in and macro was annoying the crap out of them. My bigger dogs were just like, all right, time for you guys to go.

Yeah, so that was good. And then I kind of worked out. Kind of worked out, kind of didn't work out. I'm not going to lie. Within the last two weeks, probably have worked out maybe five times. I worked out four. Yeah. Four times. But I'm excited to get back onto the track again.

So we left, what, on a Thursday last week? No, Friday last week. Friday last week, I went home and then road tripped to Ocala, Florida, if you know cities in Florida, like North Florida, like five hours away, to go surprise David. That vlog is up this afternoon, this Friday afternoon. But I went to Disney World, and that was really fun.

And then like hung around and went to all his baseball games. So that's where I was for like a week in a college boy apartment. Yeah. I'm not going to lie. So we got groceries on Tuesday, I believe, or Wednesday. Mm-hmm.

Tuesday. I think it was Tuesday. Sure, I don't know. No, either way. I think it was Wednesday. Whatever day it was, but we meal prepped. So I had like food. I have food in the fridge. I thought to myself, okay, yeah, like these like meal prepped things, they'll be fine. Like my potatoes and all that stuff. Not fine. Not fine. Not fine. I opened it up. I literally wanted to gag. It smelled so bad. And like my chicken. So I didn't cook all my chicken. Oh, no. And it was in a bag. And I was just...

It smelled really bad. I was like, this is so sad because I thought I was going to be able to go Thursday, Friday, Saturday without having to go grocery shopping, but I think I have to go grocery shopping tomorrow. Damn.

Which sucks because I hate grocery shopping not on a Sunday. Yeah, it really throws it off. It does. I didn't buy that much fridge stuff last time I went grocery shopping. You have a lot of fruit. Well, the fruit will be fine, but you have literally like watermelon, cantaloupe, strawberry. You have it all. I left watermelon at David's too. Strawberries are yours. Oh, they're mine. Okay, well, I got to eat them. Yeah, but...

Someone asked in a question box one time how we go about paying for things. I got a, when I did a question box. Yeah, wait, I got that too. They were like, how do you go about like living with someone and like paying for things? They said like when you have different income, but like.

I don't know. I guess it would still apply. One, I don't think you should live with someone if your incomes are drastically different. That seems... Yeah. That seems like an issue. Yeah. Because, like... Because then, like, everyday things will be, like, an issue. Yeah. But we, like, split our rent and our electricity and then...

We buy our own groceries, but like the basic stuff, like, I don't know. We're not going to put like two ketchups in the fridge. Yeah. That's stupid. Or like two bottles of olive oil or like two things of salt. Not that we just alternate. Like kind of. Yeah. We just alternate. That's how we go about doing things. Like literally someone asked that and I was like,

I don't know. I feel like it should be like easy. And if you're living with someone and it's like weird, you'd be like, can you handle me for rent? Or like, I don't know. We definitely made the mistake at the very beginning when we first moved in here where a few things we like split. It's like, why would we do that? Because like then at the end when the lease is over, who's going to take it? You know what I mean? Yeah, like I should have just bought this. Did I buy it?

I think I did just buy it. I think it was the rug we split or something. Something random. I think I did buy the table. I think you did. But, um, the patio set, I'm happy that like, I just bought it. Cause like what we're going to do at the end. Like, yeah. All right. I'll take one chair. You take the other chair. You know what I mean? Yeah. So, but yeah, no, everything just,

talk it out with your roommates, see what you're going to buy, see what they're going to buy. At the end of the day, if it's off by a few hundred dollars, a few dollars, it really doesn't matter. Yeah, like I'm never going to be like, can you send me five bucks? Yeah. Like, it's like not a thing. One thing I can't stand is when people Venmo request me for like the exact cent. Oh, I've never done that. I've had people do that to me in the past. I'm just like,

But I always do it to my brothers. I always send them like, if they're like, send me like $10. I always send them $9.99 and they get so mad at me. They're like, they're like, like, say we're so cheap. Like you're so cheap. What that extra penny? Like, boy. But that's funny. Yeah. But yeah, that's how we like go about that. Like we do buy our own groceries. I don't know. I got that question in a question thingy. But yeah, I'm ready to one, go to sleep. It's only seven, but I'm literally after this, going to shower, lay in bed. I have to edit. I have to edit.

Which is kind of brutal. I would have edited it on a plane, but my freaking computer was dead. And then literally I feel like I might sleep tomorrow for like... Ever? Ever. Yeah. But I think I should get up. Yeah, please get up. Because I'm going to be up. Because macro wakes me up. Please get up. Macro wakes me up sharp at 7.30. Just like a militia into my room. Yeah.

yeah i will unleash the beast yeah he is a beast in the morning my instagram post that i put him in was it my instagram post that i put him in you put him in an instagram post yeah you never commented on it and i was like did you not see i tagged you what is it because i because i made this little photo dump i was like life lately and like it was like all these little things oh i didn't even see that yeah i was like

macro is my bestie in the light of our apartment things like you for making me a doggy aunt like i literally posted this on like sunday bro okay now i have to go comment on it because people are like they're fighting we're briefing no literally every single time that's why we went home because we're briefing no seriously like i'm not even kidding anytime we're not together people think we're fighting and i don't understand why she could come to like david's apartment in ocala with me i'm like i'm okay i don't think she'd have a good time

Wait, I'm going to comment on it right now, guys. I want everyone that's listening to the podcast right now to go to it and kind of call me out that I'm going to it late. I don't even know what I'm going to say. I'm trying to think of anything else that's been new in my life. Oh, I was telling Sam. I didn't know if I wanted to say it on here or not because I didn't just want to be a pity party. But I'm not into working out anymore. That's so dramatic. I like working out, but it's not the same like...

Like I used to, Oh my God. Like anytime, any day, like I'd probably go to the gym now. Like that old, like I'd be like, I have to go work out. Like I will go to the gym. Like I was so in it and now I'm like, yeah. Yeah. I feel that, but I'm not like on the level of like, like, I don't know. I still like going to the gym. I still love, like love it. I love like the energy, the like release it gives me when I go. Um,

but yeah like it's not where i'm like oh my god i need to get to the gym like constantly thinking about it yeah like it was kind of nice to like not go not go as much we need those you need that like time i feel like every now and then in your life i feel like i want to train for something i'm like should i like train for power lifting me like i want to do something yeah like i'm done just like doing my own little silly workouts and tracking my food for like

Not no reason, but basically no reason. What am I doing that for? I'm trying to do this cut and then get to summer so I can intuitive eat. That sounds amazing to me. I'm doing that right now. I haven't tracked food in two weeks. I know, but that's not the point. Yeah, I could eat intuitive right now, but I want to get to an amazing physique that I'm really happy with. Right now, I'm just like, okay, I feel deflated. I feel like, meh.

You know, so I want to get to like that. I'm scared. Oh, my arms are big though, bro. I went out to dinner. I was wearing this shirt. We like went to go eat dinner. My mom took a picture. Like she like went to go take a selfie. Like this arm literally was huge. And I was like, oh, I was like, oh my God. And David saw me. He's like, you look beefy. Like I was like, do I look big? Like I look, I look fucking yoked. That's funny. It's very noticeable that my arms are like big. Love that.

Yeah, no, I'm just excited to see like what happens with the gut. Especially my back. Like that's the one thing I'm like excited about. But I'm pretty sad to lose the butt a little bit. Your butt's huge. Yeah, but I'm going to lose it a little bit. I didn't even like gain it. Well, I did grow out of my jeans. I did have to buy new jeans. Grow out of it? Yeah, and guess what? The first time, so I got, I'm now a size four. I think I said that last podcast or something. I had to order new pants. But I put on the size four this weekend and I had to get my mom to tell me to pull the zipper up.

Ooh. They were a little tight. Now, mind you, I'll probably wear them. Yeah. Loosen them up a little bit. But I literally put them on and I was like,

I couldn't zip them up. I was like, mom, I need your help zipping them up. Like, I think I should have got a six. Yeah. Jeans are like one of those things where it's like one weekend, they fit you great. The next weekend, they're so fucking big on you. And then the weekend after that, it's like, okay, they're normal. If I wear jeans or jean shorts, my jean shorts don't fit me either. I have to get a new pair of those for summer. But if I wear jeans the day of, or even maybe the day after leg day, I don't fit in them. Yeah. Like the pumps.

The pump. Like, I've tried on shorts, like, after leg day, and they don't fit because of the pump. But I think I almost, like, honestly should have gotten a six. They're super cute, though, from Zara. Maybe I'll link them on my Instagram story next time I wear them. Super cute. But I was shocked. I couldn't get the zipper up. Yeah, I need to go buy more jeans. Maybe my legs have grown? Because maybe I went up two pants sizes? Oh, they've 100% grown. I've been doing some stocking. Like, do you ever just, like, get, like, not, like, sad, but, like, you just get, like, well, kind of like what we were saying, like, kind of in a rut with, like, our fitness journey or whatever, but...

I look back on our photos of us when we first started. Twigs. I know. Twigs. And that was like a year ago, like last year. So it's so crazy to think about. Yeah, I was going through my camera on the plane because, I mean, obviously we've already discussed I had no Wi-Fi and it was a four-hour flight. So I was going through my camera and deleting things and putting things into albums as one does. And I was like, I was so sure.

yeah like i was like like looking at things i mean doing like lap pull downs and you can see like every like i know but i wasn't big like i couldn't like they didn't stick out yeah like i couldn't like show my lats like i didn't know how to do but i was literally shredded my butt was bigger though guys i'm telling you like i'll post some little like i don't know if it was just like i was like every day's leg day type girl like hated upper body day but like my butt was big like when i was going to like la fitness

My upper body was small. You're sounding crazy right now. You have a big butt. I will show you the pictures, bro. Like, crazy. If I took that picture, like, today, I'd be like, oh, whatever. My upper body, like, I wasn't, like, into, like, as good of upper body. So, like, now my upper body... Maybe it's just because I'm more proportional. Mm-hmm. That it, like... Like, maybe my butt looked bigger. Yeah. That's a good point. I was, like, my arms were small. So, like, proportionally, it was bigger. And now it's, like, all over I'm bigger. Yeah. So, maybe it's that. Yeah. But...

that's that but it did grow out of my pants yeah i don't know man what else has been happening in our life honestly that's like pretty much it honestly i just was vibing like it was really nice i wasn't posting that much oh both of us are like off tiktok yeah i'm like fully deleting the app i think yeah the app is off my phone um my account got banned i still get dms about that it got banned for community freaking guidelines whatever but i i don't think i'm gonna get it back

The only reason I would want to get it back, like, really all those videos are just gone, kind of. Yeah. I mean, I still have the account, but I just, I delete the app. So I'm like, I kind of want to get the account back and delete the app just because it's like, those are like all my videos, like, those are like videos of my life and like things I did. And it's kind of like, they're all just like gone. Yeah. Like that kind of sucks because it's like time and memories and shit. Yeah. But yeah, I don't think I'll ever get back on that app ever again. So if you guys are like,

no where's tiktok it's just like the most toxic app worst app ever like it's so hypocritical of like what has happened like personally like with me and stuff like

How much cyberbullying I've experienced in the last, like, two weeks stemmed from that app. And it's, like, only on TikTok. Like, my comment section on TikTok right now, I know. I mean, there is none anymore. It's gone. But if it did exist, when it did exist, like, ruthless. Yeah. I think I only got, like, three DMs. Like, I got a handful of DMs. Yeah. And they're all on fucking TikTok. You can control it more. It was, like, hundreds on TikTok.

And like if I if my account still up, they'd probably still be going, but they're not on Instagram. No one's in my Instagram. Like you're going to comment on Instagram photo. Yeah, that's like ballsy. Yeah. To be. And it's like some people did a little bit, but not to the not anywhere near. No one would also make reels how they make TikToks. Exactly. So Instagram is just a better place. YouTube is a better place. This podcast is a better place.

But TikTok, it also just like takes so much of your time. Like I'm done scrolling. Like all the app makes me do is scroll and waste my time and be sad. Yeah. Like if you guys, if this is like honestly for anyone, whether you're a creator or just like a viewer on TikTok, like if you're struggling with like mental health, I would really look into deleting that TikTok app just because like not only like say you're not even making content and you don't have content.

mean people coming to you directly saying things about you if you're scrolling and you see someone being negative to someone else it puts a toll on you as well like yeah see like if I'll sometimes I'll be like on like a wedding video or like a engagement video and you think the comment section is going to be amazing but then all of a sudden you go to the comment section it's just like ripping the video apart for something so stupid and small yeah and then it would like that shit would also just like piss me off

yeah exactly the hell like yeah people just suck and then it makes you not even want to like do things you enjoy or like post things you enjoy i know because people are just so mean so i think i'm gonna be really into reels because reels reels are very like aesthetic like when i scroll through my reels they're like well crafted like beautiful little videos whereas tiktok is just like

yeah whatever and like people make nice reels like let me tell you when i'm scrolling i'm like what the hell like they're beautiful they're filmed on like a camera they're like impeccable so i think i'm gonna be like into reels but tiktok is just not it right now so if you're like when are you coming back uh yeah i'm definitely trying as well to get my screen time down more oh yeah my screen time is shit

Like, macro has definitely helped a lot with, like, my screen time as well. Like, at night, like, I'm hanging out with him. Like, the morning, hanging out with him. Like, whatever it is throughout the day. And now that I don't have TikTok, I think those two combined together are going to, like, do pretty good for me. And I want to, while I'm here, to, like, not be in the apartment as much. Like, go do things, whether it's go on, like, a walk. Go...

On a high like I don't know just be more outside because it's getting nicer now and I just want to be more off my phone Agreed. I got a book for christmas that I haven't started yet And I like reading a lot but it's hard for me to get into it because like when i'm tired at the end of the night I just want to put on tv Like I just want to put on tv and fall asleep Yeah, but I know reading makes me feel better and I realize I don't even have to do it at night like

all the times i'd like let's say sit on the couch and like scroll on tiktok i can read a book yeah like i don't i don't have to just go on instagram yeah because if at night i want to watch tv i can still watch tv at night but i can wake up and read or like i don't know i feel like there's so much time so i can like sit on the couch or sit in my bed on my phone so like why not read read the book because every time i get into reading a book you guys have heard me say it on here i love it and it makes me so happy but getting back into it like i can't stop once i stop and like

it's game over but I got Verity by Colleen Hoover which is like everyone talks about how just amazing that book is and how it's such a great book and it's her best book and I just can't find it in me to like pick it up and start reading it

But I know I need to because I know it'll make me feel good to not be on my phone so much. My screen time is like seven hours. I don't even want to know what my screen time is though. That's really bad. I am going to look at it just so I can get an idea of like if I'm going to start like decreasing my screen time starting next week. Like next week I already know is going to be such a good week for me like with Maya being in. Oh yeah guys my best friend from home is coming to visit for the week next week. So having her in town like I know I'm going to be out and about all day doing stuff with her.

And I just wanted to be like a fresh start to just not like, I don't know what's the word I'm looking for. Not like being more like, I don't fucking know. Just off social media more. Sorry guys, I'm not reposting as much. Living more in like real life. Yeah, more real life stuff. Yeah. Like more actually like physically real life, not like phone. Yeah, exactly. Like I sometimes I get so caught up in like work that I forget that like there's more to life than me like recording everything I'm doing. So yeah.

yeah yeah cool yeah rant sick bro we can get into the episode i guess now yeah so someone left a review calling you out it was like it takes so long to get to like like i don't they listen to us talk and then yeah because guess what it's our podcast yeah talk all i want so like that's for you i'm like if you don't like it all i want oh speaking of reviews leave a nice review um

on apple podcast just putting that out there leave a nice review that'd be five star rating baby yeah most of them are like super nice if you left a nice review i have read them they're super cute but this um episode someone commented on my on my reel because i'm a reeler now of my squad transformation and they were like oh my god like whatever like can you talk about this you should make an ego lifting podcast and i was like bingo great topic great idea because i

Okay. I wouldn't say I was like ego lifting. I was just learning at the time. Right. Like, I don't think I was ego lifting. Like I was just learning. And in my opinion with my squat specifically, I was like, I'm just tall. It's hard for me to get low to the ground. I'm tall. I will not be like ass to grass squatting. I'm five, seven. Like the only girls I really saw doing that.

were like, so short. They're like 5'1", and they squat all the way to the floor. And I'm like, that's not fair. Like, I'm tall. And then the thing is, too, on social media, when you're watching someone, you don't necessarily know how tall someone is. Like, for example, Christy's squat form, immaculate. Like, looks so good, but then when you're in person with her, you're like, oh, okay, she's 5'0". That's why she can get ass to grass, and that's why she has such a small range of motion. Yeah, some people are already like,

close to the ground yeah it's like it's so it's different for everyone but I decided to restart my squat um at the beginning of this bulk so maybe in like September ish maybe like October even I don't really know when it's sometime around there but I was like so basically I'm going I'm gonna find my form um figure it out find what's good to me and then do I was doing eight reps and

Because anything more than that literally tires me out like cardio. So I was doing eight reps with whatever weight I can do though. That per like what I thought in my head in that moment, like what I considered like perfect form for me and my body. And that was like 115 pounds. I was like, I started off with like, I think I honestly did my first set at like 95 and worked my way up to like 110, 115 in my first like set of doing it.

And I was like, okay, I'm doing this form for every single rep and set that I do. And I will only go up weight if I can do this form. And now I can squat like my higher reps that we did 185 at Alphaland. I never put that much for like three, like the same way I squatted the 115. And that was basically my goal through doing it all. And I just slow and steady. Like I had to kind of take away.

like my my ego out of it I guess because you know I was like like you're telling me I just did like x amount of weight and now I'm gonna like put like 25s and just like leave it and I was like yeah because like you gotta just you gotta start from square one yeah like I would have put tens if that's what I could do to have it feel good for like eight reps and it was like tempting to like cheat it here and there like oh maybe I should just go heavier and like stay up a little higher but like

I got to the point where I can't stay up higher. Like, I don't know how to stop my body higher, which I don't know if that's bad. But I, like, can't... Like, I need to, like, go all the way down with, like, the form that I've done. And a few things that helped me with...

My squat in particular, they might not help you because form cues, I feel like are very like individual, like someone, like, like someone says something into like me, it might click instantly and I might really get it into someone else. It makes no difference. So, you know, these might not help you at all. Something that really helped me this one, I used to on rack with like one foot behind and one foot in front on rack with two feet, like,

Like plant two feet in the ground right next to each other at the same point and then on racket. Huge difference. I don't know what amazing difference night and day. It's funny you're saying that because I'm like, you didn't do that already. I think I did. Okay. Maybe. No. Yeah. I think I had one foot behind. I'll find old videos.

I'm pretty sure I did that like I would never focus on it yeah like I would never put like intent yeah I think that's more what it is the unrock is definitely really important the unrock is definitely really yeah like I feel like really having like intent behind like yeah taking it off that's like the main thing because even if you're like okay I do use two feet okay but like do it with like purpose like really really have purpose with it and

And then really, really, really, really focusing on squeezing my shoulder blades together. Which, like I said, this is, like, it's not to say, like, I didn't. Like, obviously, I did. I wasn't, like, slouching with a barbell on my back. But, like, I didn't have as much focus. And, like, in between each rep, now I, like, reset. Like, I won't go down unless it's, like, tight as hell up there. So it's, like, redirecting my focus.

with that was a big thing and then like working with um my stance with my feet i can't tell you where to put your feet you're gonna have to figure that out figure that out on your own but like a little bit wider stance for me work good really focusing on pushing my knees out that whole thing a shout out amanda beck uh the queen the queen herself squats like 225 for 10 get out of here but i

I saw her squat and I was like, I think maybe she's not. I've never, I have seen her in real life, but very, very quickly. Um, and I don't remember, maybe she is totally different body proportion than me. She could be taller, shorter, but I was like, I think she's similar height and build to me. Like, I think she might be. So I tried to like, look at the way she squatted and tried to like semi mimic it and it felt right. And it felt good.

So that's how I went with it. Because like we were saying, like if you can tell someone's maybe similar height, like how I squat at 5'7", long legs, really long torso is going to be different than like Sam, shorter torso, 5'5". Or like how we said, like our Christy, 5 foot. It's going to look different. So I just like, she looked similar enough to me that I could...

Go off kind of what she was doing. So I guess I'm... I'll go into like kind of like mine too because I think it will help to have like both inputs. But...

Taylor, you also mentioned you had like lower back pain too. I know where mine stemmed from. Mine stemmed from like a very weak core. Like if you guys feel like you don't have good core strength and you're not fully like bracing your core on your back squat, work on strengthening your abs, do core exercises, whatever you need to do. I took a step back from not even squatting for like two months because it hurt me so much. Same with deadlifts.

And once I got my core strength back up and my mobility with my hips and all that, that's when I jumped back into it. But another thing too with the body anatomy is our femurs. I saw Squat University made this post about

um like the length of your femurs and if you have a short femur long femur it totally depends on like how forward you're leaning and how low the bar needs to be on your back whether it's a higher um low bar squat so i've been really working on getting the bar so low on my back like i thought my low bar squat was like a low bar squat but then i started like playing around with like literally like

If you got, oh, actually I posted a video of me squatting the other day on my reels. Like if you go look at it, like I am legit, like my back's like parallel with the, with the ground. So my form has definitely changed a lot.

And you just need to really focus on like what works for you because everybody's body is built differently and that's going to go for that. And it's also going to go for deadlifts as well. Yeah. Um, yeah, I forgot to really mention that we had made a list, but I'm going to like backtrack since you said the back thing for me, like when I realized my form was like off one, it was just like depth and videos. I mean, it was probably hitting like exactly 90, but I mean, I just knew it could look a little better. Um,

I don't think everyone's squat needs to be like butt to the ground. Like there are some videos where it literally looks like I'm about to sit. Not everyone's squat needs to be like that for it to like count and be good enough. But that's genuinely what feels most comfortable to me in my body. But the reason I wanted to start was like I was, my back pain came from the way I was like coming up from the squat and coming down because it was like I was lifting like

I'm trying to like think of how to like word it without like a video. No, because you made a really good point at the very beginning. Like if you're not fully engaging your upper body, you're not going to like, you're not going to do the squat properly. So like now that you're like, keep going with what you're saying, but that's probably where it stems from. It's hard for me to explain because I wish I had like a video demonstration. Like I'm trying to think of like with words, kind of more like hinging my hips up and arching my back to get the weight up, which is like, that's what was causing it.

to be in pain was like arching it to get it up um so yeah that was like my biggest thing and then i just felt like i would do squats and my whole body would like ache yeah probably because like you just said like not really like really really really being mindful of my back and my upper body um whereas now i do squats and only my legs unless i'm doing like so so so heavy but like for the most part

I'm really, really, really pushing the weight with just my legs and I don't feel anything in my back. Yeah.

I find squats to be very fun now. Me too. I really enjoy them. Love them. I love going so heavy, like low rep. Oh, I love squat. It's so fun, which I haven't squatted in like two weeks, unfortunately. Well, actually, I squatted yesterday, but it wasn't fun. But I'm excited to get back into it because I love going heavy. I love a nice heavy leg day. But you guys are probably wondering, you're like, what the hell? Restarting your back squat, how do I know if I should be doing that? Of course not.

Of course, film yourself, guys. If you're not filming yourself, it doesn't have to be because you want to post it on social media. It's also going to help so much with form. Looking it back, yeah, you're looking in the mirror, but you're not seeing everything in the way you're moving. Girls are constantly... And by the way, shout out to the Facebook group. You guys are always posting your videos and asking for form advice. I love that. Because I'll sometimes be like, oh my god, I want to comment. But then I'm like, you know what? I'll let the other girls do it because...

they're like all so sweet and just like doing it. I'm like, I know you guys got each other's backs, but don't worry. I see every single post that goes on the Facebook group, by the way. I approve all of them. But yeah, so in terms of recording yourself, if you notice a butt wink, that is one thing where maybe restarting or working on mobility, knees caving in, that is going to also have to do with maybe your mobility and lowering the weight and really focusing on the knee drive out.

Pelvic tilts, obviously, you know, that's going to have to be with mobility. Well, they're all mobility and whatever. I'm just reading from this list, but I'll keep reading the list. But obviously, it's all going to have to do with mobility and, you know, strength.

starting square one, but single leg dominance. So if you feel like you're leaning one way or the other and then lower back pain and then depth, which we already covered. Yeah. And butt wink. Whenever I post about my butt wink, everyone's like, what is that? Look at a video of someone squatting me squatting. You can find them on my page. Cause I've called it like I I'll do it. You get to the bottom and your butt curve, like,

I'm trying to explain it because I'm not... There's obviously... I can probably Google right now and read off like fancy words of what it is, but I want you guys to actually like see it and understand. Your butt literally like curves under. It's your tailbone. Yeah, your tailbone. Like looking down on the ground. Yeah. Like you should keep...

from your tailbone like literally from the edge of your butt to your head should be like a straight line and if you get to the bottom of your squat and your tailbone like curves under That's what like a butt wink is you can see it like in the bottom of a squat in a video But that's what it is but yeah, those are just all things that you can look for in your squat and it's also just like feeling like it's hard to

Sometimes it might be hard for you to like see all these things or whatever, but it's like feeling like I said I just didn't feel good in my squats. I felt in pain. I felt all these things So that's when I realized I had to completely just restart and you can do it with any single lift I think Sam's gonna go into talking about what she did with like her deadlift because Same thing goes for a deadlift as it does for squat form is different for everyone and there's also two very different ways that you can deadlift and

And you can do what works for you. Yes. I have, that's one thing that I've been really struggling with the last, like, I would say half year. I love sumo deadlifting. Don't get me wrong, but it just fucks my body up so bad. And I don't know if that was also because I had such a weak core and it was my lower back pain and whatnot. But because of that, I started incorporating conventional. I started doing conventional. I was like, what the hell? Like, this is fun. I like doing this. Doesn't really put much, like,

tension on my body but also I wasn't really going like super heavy and really like into it because I was nervous about my form but um it finally came to the point maybe like two months ago a month and a half ago where I was like you know what Sam you need to decide on one of them and stick with it and start to program it and if you feel like you are really in between two of them and you're like I don't know which one I like more I don't know which one my body prefers more um

I don't know what I'm stronger with. Who cares about the stronger part? Knock that out because you want to do whatever is more comfortable for you. And,

I just went straight into doing conventional because I knew how sumo made my body feel. So when I went straight into conventional and started really training that and really progressing on that, first of all, also, I want to keep in mind before I did all of this, I went for like a one rep max just to see where I stood with my strength for it. So that way, when I was programming it, I knew like kind of the numbers to be aiming for. But, um,

I would just recommend literally just doing a nice 180 and like switching from maybe sumo to conventional or conventional to sumo, trying them both out and see what feels best for your body. It's, I know it's so simple, simply said, but honestly, like I didn't realize how smoothly and nice like conventional felt on my body. Um,

and I like it so much better and you know it's just it's what works for me I have such long legs and such a short torso so like when I was doing sumo like my stance I just don't know it wasn't my favorite so try it out do them both conventional I'm team conventional now and Taylor's still sumo yeah but um I'm not even built for sumo deadlifting I remember making the video with stuffy

I forgot what she said the super right proportions are, but she just basically was like, yeah, you're... I'm not built to lift. She was like, I mean, your stance is going to look awkward because you're just long. Steffi's five foot and compact and built, so it's like she looks great sumo. She just looks great deadlifting and lifting because she's compact and I look...

just wrong just so wrong like I just it looks so awkward she's like yeah well you're gonna look awkward because you just you're not built for it I like it I enjoy it my back is easily deround one because it's literally crooked I have scoliosis which has been acting up recently and it's really annoying but I'm literally crooked so getting my back straight in a deadlift has always been

like a struggle for me because even if I think my back is really straight, I can look at a video and it looks curved. And then I have to remember that I am built crooked. Yeah. That's like my one thing with deadlifting is I like, no matter how hard I try and I guess in any lift, but it's just so evident with deadlifting. I just always look kind of messed up in the back. Yeah. Always. So that can kind of bring us in to talking about ego lifting because I

There are two different types of ego lifting guys to keep in mind. And that is going to be, you know, the beginners, what you would think is ego lifting and like you're legit a few years into lifting and you're ego lifting, you know? So there's obviously like those differences. Taylor was saying at the beginning, like with her squat, like back in the day, like we were just lifting weight, heavy weight, trying to lift the heaviest we could for maybe wasn't the best. And, um,

when when it comes to like those compound lifts it is important to understand that like at the end of the day if you're going for one rep max or if you're going for like say a set that's 10 reps and maybe your eighth ninth tenth rep are ugly that's so completely normal but if you're going for like 10 sets or I'm sorry 10 sets 10 reps and each rep

does not look good that we we are going to classify that as ego looking each rep does not look good or like they're um like like not look good like maybe like you hit depth but it's like so ugly on the way up so much butt wink or like you're doing half reps or like you know like things like that there's many ways it could like look ugly like you're either not completing any type of rep or you are completing the reps and they're trash garbage yeah like they're just horrible but the biggest thing

is that you're still kind of learning. So there is that kind of like, at least not you're doing it on purpose. I mean, some people might be, but at the end of the day, you got to learn. Like you might do a set with 135 on the bar to try and then you lower it for your next set. Just because you did one set

great doesn't mean like oh you're ego lifting yeah just try don't even get me started on that because tiktok is the worst with that i know it's literally terrible because it's like obviously you're not always gonna look perfect when you're trying like a lift especially once something you've never done because how are you supposed to know what weight you're gonna put on or

Or like you just never know. Or sometimes you've off days. Maybe one day 135 is a beautiful working weight for you. And you throw 135 and that day is not your day. Yeah. And you are looking like a hot mess. Doesn't mean you're ego lifting. Like you just didn't have a great set. And as long as you're not. Especially. Yeah. Sorry. Sorry to interrupt. Especially with like pyramid sets. Like those are so common and big. People use them all the time. And say I wanted to film my top set on my pyramid set. And maybe the form was lacking a little bit. Or it was.

It wasn't the best compared to like my like first set. People will go at you on TikTok. That's why I deleted the app again. Another reason. But yeah, Taylor saying that makes a good point is like it's not going to be like 100% all the time if you are going to step out of your comfort zone to pick up that weight. Yeah. Someone commented on my squat video from Alpha Land. Like it looks like you're leaning forward on your toes, like still terrible form.

I was literally totally aware. I literally told you that I didn't go do another rep because I felt myself leaning forward. Like I'm not dumb. Like, yeah, the rep wasn't perfect. I'm, I'm working out. Like I'm giving it my 150% effort. And I did feel myself leaning forward, which is why I could have probably got four, maybe five, but I stopped. So I didn't like fall over. Cause I can feel myself not being balanced on my feet. And it's like,

Yeah, but like I'm trying. Like why would my like first time adding a weight, like not first time doing 185, first time doing 185 since I started restarting my back squat, is it going to be perfect? No, it's not. It was like a three rep max. Like why would it be perfect? And it literally just irks me to the core of people thinking that your form also not looking textbook perfect is ego lifting because...

Like I said, with, for example, like my scoliosis or something like sometimes I just look awkward because of my body proportions and because my back is crooked. That doesn't mean I'm ego lifting because I don't look like textbook perfect for how form should look. People are built differently and people are going to do things differently. And as long as you are not going to hurt yourself, I promise you, you're totally fine.

And hurting yourself is less like people, everything just stick to people on TikTok really. They think any form that looks any, any percent less than like textbook perfect is like, you're going to hurt yourself. No, you're not. Let's also make the point of saying that if it looks so perfect, are you trying hard enough? No. Like if your deadlift is legit perfect and you're not breaking a sweat,

Are you trying hard enough? Yeah. Also, your back is like allowed to round a little bit in a deadlift. That's like such a normal thing. Like look up anyone going for like a heavy deadlift. So normal. And if you do all your deadlift sets, like I just, I can't with the people that do every single set of every exercise. So incredibly perfect. I just don't understand. Like go in the gym and get ugly. Not for every single, every, every single rep.

have the worst form but like you're a lot like push push you shouldn't look beautiful you shouldn't look straight out of a textbook if you're giving it your absolute all yeah um especially in the beginning but that's like the whole that's like innocent ego lifting quote-unquote ego lifting that's you're trying it wasn't your best you switch the weight and go again yeah but then like you said there's also this is my favorite one this is i think the biggest ego lifting of all time

big swole dude in the lap pull down oh my god i was gonna say that i was gonna say that they're everywhere they literally put like the whole stack and they're fucking pulling with their entire body their entire body they literally lean back almost directly horizontal yeah and i'm like it's like they're like trying to like hit their chest with the bar it's so bad go crazy and like that

That's ego lifting. And let's be real. Not many girls like ego lift like that. And they're screaming. They're yelling. It's always the boys. It's always men. It's only the men. Good thing this is like 90% female. Because if a girl has heavy weight. Maybe I'm being sexist towards the men. Sorry. I think most of the time when a girl has heavy weight and blah, blah. Like she's just trying. Okay. She's trying to be strong. And she's trying to get there. She's just giving it her all. The dude is trying to be like this alpha man.

alpha male like yeah and look and it's like no one fucking cares drop the weight put put 50 pounds on there like you're probably supposed to and do a rep like why are you screaming and leaning all the way backwards on the lat pull down bro it's always the lat pull down i think it's so funny that we both like agreed on that one exercise that's just because it's the only one i ever see it's the most obvious one to see like

Because you can just look and you're like, that, what are you doing? Like, it's not even like... Oh, and it's worse too because they're always doing like...

15 15 reps like it's not like they're doing it for like five they're doing like 15 which is also weird but i've seen shitty reps i saw a guy one time do like three reps on the lat pulldown i was like you're training your lat pulldown low rep i was like why are you doing three like that's so strange to me no no hate do you work out as you please but that's weird to me to be doing like going going for my three rep max no yeah

but um sorry dudes listening to this i know there's a few dudes listening roasting you but i there has to be i literally can't think of another exercise i do dudes ego lift yeah as much as a lap the only thing with like bent over rows but i guess girls do that too but yeah the only thing i'm gonna say with like ego lifting is like if your form is not like okay obviously it's not gonna be perfect but if it's like if we were to put it like through a one through ten like

one being like the worst form you've ever seen you're gonna hurt yourself like you need to stop to like 10 like that's perfect if you're like anywhere under what like six yeah like a six check yourself restart do we need to do because you don't want to be doing that from like

Say you're doing four sets by eight to 10 and those four full sets of eight to 10 look like shit. You're, you need to figure something out, drop the weight, restart, work on mobility. I don't know whatever it is, but that is what I would classify as ego lifting. If you're,

If the last set is like that, so be it. It's fine. But if every single set is like that, you need to work on it. I thought of another exercise guys do. All cable machine baby. Men do not know how to use a cable machine. Tricep pushdowns. Tricep pushdowns. You're supposed to keep your elbows close to your body. These dudes be swinging this weight around during tricep pushdowns. And I'm like,

Bro. So men don't know how to use cable machines. That's going to be the title of this episode. They're going to be. Men don't know how to. Yeah, fight me. Yeah, literally. Send me videos of you doing good lat pulldowns and good tricep pushdowns. Oh, God. Don't do that. I'm going to get so. I know. Stop, Taylor. Only girls listen to this. We're so far in. You think there's a dude still here? I don't know. Yeah, there's some. Maybe not the ones that are like trying to like hit on us. I don't know. I don't think I know. But yeah, that's another thing that they do in.

With the triceps. You want it super random, so off topic. But one of like my like things that I've noticed lately in my like DMs of guys is their physique. They send me their physique. I'm just like, I'm like, oh, do you want me to just like flaunt over you and just fly you out? Like what do you want? I think it's so weird that guys do that. Imagine if girls like were like, here's my physique. Ew. Anyways. Sorry. Sorry. For one rep maxes too.

I really don't think ego lifting is a thing on a one rep match. Yeah. On a squat match or deadlift. Your one rep max deadlift is literally going to be ugly. Yeah. Like if you can get that shit off the fucking ground. You got it off the fucking ground. You got it off the fucking ground. Like I don't know what to tell you. Like you got it off the fucking ground. A one rep max deadlift is a one rep max deadlift. A one rep max squat is...

You might come up kind of ugly. I would say keep it to like a three out of ten. Right? Like you don't want to be looking like you're literally like bending your back. If you hit a one, you might hurt yourself. Yeah. So that's what, so like keep it like a three or four. Yeah. Like don't hurt yourself. But that also comes with like, you got to know your, like I'm saying besides injury, like if you are not hurting yourself, your squat bench might

ugly like your bench you're like it's gonna be slow on the way up like yeah but like who cares like your squat your butt oh my god the biggest thing for me i freaking can't stand this is when people well in general just like if your butt comes off like like the tiniest bit it doesn't count it doesn't count i'm like

It's like not even a one rep max or just in general. I was trying to get the fucking weight back onto the bench so it doesn't fall on top of me. Like it's when it comes off. Cause I've, I've seen a lot of people. I was talking about this this weekend actually. Cause I was with David's baseball team and this one kid posted a Snapchat of him repping 225 and they were like,

looking at it because the kid wasn't there and I was like none of that counted bro like his butt was like it was for reps and every single rep his butt was like a foot in the air I was like none of that counted oh my god like none of that counted like you do not rep 225 for 10 you probably rep it for one put your butt on the thing and like that's different yeah that's different and girls do it too okay that just literally happened like two days ago but girls do it too lots of them but if it comes up like

half a fucking inch on your last rep of like literally so you don't die. What do you want me to drop it? Like I'm by myself. I have no other choice, but my ass is coming up, but I'd rather cheat my last rep on bench then drop it. Like I'm going to get it up. Yeah. Even if it's not pretty, like I'm not, I would never ever rep more than two reps a

with my butt coming off the ground for all of them and say it counts yeah like that just yeah neither would that's not gonna happen but like one i don't think a one rep max is ego lifting at all because they're just hype that they got it up okay if you're a dude and you bench 315 you're benching over three plates and your butt comes off a little bit i'll hype you up that's cool good job you know what i mean another thing too is like it's also a learning experience like say like

Like, my one rep max, whatever, it looks so ugly. A year from now, I'm going to, like, look back on that and be like, okay, one, I'm embarrassed. Like, that was, like, my one rep max, and it was, like, the ugliest thing I've ever seen. Like, you know what I mean? Like, you'll learn from, like, your mistakes of your form over time. So, like, if you think, like, you're doing great right now, you may look back a year from now and be like, oh, my goodness. Like, that wasn't great, you know? Yeah. Also, it's very common, like, to know what form, like,

let's say for me um dumbbell bent over rows are not i hate them i like to try to do them because i know they're good and they're good for you and they're gonna get me my back looking right but the form for me i can't really get down too much i'm getting better at it and i know how it's supposed to look okay i know what i'm supposed to do i'm trying some days are better than others so it's like when you get a comment being like do this like i know like i'm trying like i'm in the gym working out like i'm

Like I'm giving it my all just because you know, like step by step how to do something doesn't mean immediately you can execute it perfectly. Like you got to like learn a little film. It's always the mechanics behind it too. Like it's not something that's just going to happen overnight. Like, oh my God. Say it's, I don't even freaking know, like pulling your elbow more to your hip. Like that may not be possible right away because maybe you have tight lats. Maybe you have like something like mechanic wise that you need to fix and

You can't just fix it overnight. Yeah. Habits are also hard to break. Like, if you were used to doing something for a long time, it's going to take you a while for, like, I mean, four sets of 10, we're talking 40 reps. To go from 40 reps doing one way to 40 reps doing it another way, it's going to take you, like, a second. So, overall, I think ego lifting is way too... I feel like it's almost talked about way too much for, like, no reason. Yeah. Like...

Mostly on TikTok. I'm literally only going to say it on TikTok because I don't ever, I honestly, this whole topic, this whole situation really wouldn't have been a thing of like even talking about if it wasn't for the app of TikTok. Because Instagram and all that, no one really like comments on other people's stuff, you know? I'd say ego lifting people on TikTok think it's like anytime your form looks less than textbook. When ego lifting is really the guys in the lap hold down.

someone doing legitimately quarter squats like or like negative range of motion like there's clear difference between like you literally did no range of motion on the exercise like that didn't count versus like you're just trying to learn yeah so that's what i think about that i think ego lifting is like really really like i just can't with the form police the form police are brutal

yeah literally brutal really very much so like especially just like on the squat video people being like still bad form with things like you're leaning on your toes one thing i said i was like one my blazers are big on me so what's coming up off the ground isn't my heel it's my shoe like the back of my shoe lifts off the ground because the shoes are big on me there's like a little bit of space that lifts and like i said at alpha land i did lean forward and i knew it and i stopped so it's like and i never said my squat was now perfect

I said it got better. Yeah. Like you're gonna tell me it didn't get better? And I'll probably one day use the videos from like these past months as like progress videos. Yeah. You know what I mean? And it's funny too because even like with saying all this is like not a single person in the gym...

expert or not is like perfect at what they do you know everybody no matter their level is still every day working on something different or looking back a few months from now and seeing something that they like are now doing better at if that makes sense like

J.J.P., whatever his name is. Is that what his name is? J.P.G. J.P.G., whatever his name is. I guarantee, yeah, that guy, his content is centered around, like, form and all that type of stuff, but he's constantly learning every single day. Like, he's probably looking back on things that he's done, like,

A year from like a year ago that he's like, oh, like that was not right. And now I'm doing it better than what I was. You know, everybody is always learning. Like no one's perfect. JPG probably on the last set of a bent over row also probably doesn't look the most fantastic. Yeah. Using a little bit of his legs. Yeah. You know, like.

I mean, he might not post that one, but like he probably does sometimes because eventually like, let's say you've been using, probably not him. I don't know what he uses, but let's say for me, let's say you've been using like a 50 pound dumbbell. You're going to go for the 60. Okay.

a little bit, your legs a little bit. Okay, try. Like, how else are you going to go up and wait? Yeah. Like, how are you going to know? Like, today I know I'll grab the 60 and do it perfect. Like, how do you know? No. That's another thing. Like, why I got, like, so mad, like, earlier when we were talking about the TikTok and

Going for like a going for a wait. Like the first time I ever went for 135 on a barbell row, I recorded it. And the whole video, it blew up. I'm sure some of you have probably seen it on TikTok. But the video blew up because the purpose of the video was the grandmother working out behind me.

And I had thrown 135 on the bar for like a bent over row. And I wanted to try it out. I wanted to see if I could do it. I recorded myself because I wanted to see what my form would look like. But anyway, I posted the video on TikTok and everyone in the comments was like, this is ego lifting. This is like, what are you doing? Like, no one was talking about the grandma. I was like, why are we not talking about the grandma? The grandma's literally in the gym, like working on herself. But everyone was commenting on my form and all that stuff. But I'm like...

And then people were saying like, why would you record yourself? Like, this is embarrassing. So I can see what I look like. Like, you know what I mean? So it's like not everyone's posting things on social media for the form. Like they're maybe posting it on just for like documenting it or whatever.

Just seeing like what it looks like. I don't know. So that's something just to keep in mind. It's just not all that freaking serious. It really isn't. That's like literally what it is. It's not so serious. If you are not literally going to injure yourself. Now, yeah, you should work on your form because work smarter, not harder. You want to be hitting the muscles you want to hit and getting the results you want to get, right? Yeah. You want to be hitting that range of motion and hitting the right technique to be really engaging the right muscles, right?

to get the results you want because you don't want to be in the gym basically doing nothing but realistically if you make back progress a little bit faster a little bit slower because your row technique's not the best that literally does not impact my life at all and i don't care like yeah literally don't care couldn't care less couldn't care less the only people that i will make fun of for ego lifting is the man screaming on the lap hold down that's it

sorry that any of the men feel like so hurt like hurt by this you should feel it why are you screaming on the lap pull down they always do it yeah no i agree but you know what's weird the guy i saw do it recently he was big and i'm like so maybe this maybe maybe it works yeah right wait a second lean all the way back all the way back all the way back

Don't even think like any type of thinking of like maybe engaging. No, just yank it, lean all the way back and scream. He's pretty big. Wait, that's such a good point. If you see me screaming on the lap, pull down. It's like the guy from the gold gym. I remember it was like doing the hack squat thing or like, he was literally crying. Like he was on the ground, like on all four, like crying. Like maybe I can just load like 150 onto the lap, pull down and just like, ah, ah.

I want to buy microphones just for that sole reason. Just like everyone here now. Have you seen Skylar's like reels? I think he does it on reels. He'll do like gym vlogs. Yeah. Really good content. Really good like, I'm like, that's funny. Yeah. And I want to do it too. So Skylar, I'm confident.

Literally though. Those microphones are expensive though. Yeah, but those are like really funny. Like I actually enjoy those little vlogs. He's like not even listening to this. We wouldn't be able to do it at Lift ATX because their music is so freaking loud. But those are really funny. Like I watch them when you post them. We have to go to that. Oh, by the way, so random. I assume we're done with this episode, right? I guess. Okay. Because I was going to say. We have to go to that new gym that just opened down here in Austin. Lost Campus. Something. I don't know if I'm saying it right. Sorry, guys. Okay.

But it just opened in the South, like the South Lamar area, I think. I don't know. I could be wrong. Yeah. Love a new gym. Guys, I was in, okay, like I said, I went to Ocala. If any of you live near that area, probably like one of you, it's like me.

That Gold's Gym is the nicest Gold's Gym, nicest commercial gym I've ever been through in my life. They had everything. They had every machine imaginable, like literally big tech level machines, like every hack squat, every leg press, every leg curl, dumbbell racks for shoulder press for incline bench and for flat bench. You're about to give this gym like more membership. So many squat racks, beautiful locker rooms. I think they just built it like last week. Like it is immaculate in there.

And I was like, Ocala's kind of in the middle of nowhere. I was like, this gold is going to be so trash. Like, because I'm literally in the middle of nowhere. Like, why would it be a nice gym? Beautiful. I was in shock. That would have been perfect. Actually, no. Our golds membership we had wasn't multi. I know. I had to buy a day pass every day. I really think I could have just walked right in. But part of me was like, what if they, like,

come and get me yeah i like mid-workout and they're like ma'am i like the oh you didn't pay for your i guess i guess i'll give a shout out to that gym that i was going to in um where i'm from bayshore athletic club in braintree massachusetts guys if you guys live near there check it out super cool i've only gone there maybe like four times but it's massive lighting's immaculate but yeah yeah i'm excited to be back in my home gym

Yeah, me too. And I'm excited to go to sleep. Oh, also, there was a Bachelor women's tell-all. I watched it. Oh, you did? Yeah. Wait, who won? No one yet. They do a little women's thing in the middle. I was going to say, am I that behind? No. Mac's snoring right now. I need to wake him up so that way he can not go to bed yet. Well, that's all for now, folks. Bye, guys. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.

See you on Friday.