Sparrows. Pigeons. Eagles. Feathery, flappy things. They're not real. That's right, today we cover the Birds Aren't Real conspiracy theory, which, well, isn't real. We mean, it's real, but it's not real. They don't really think birds aren't real. Yet so much thought and effort has been put into fabricating a conspiracy theory just to shame some silly protesters. Seriously. This kid has gotten rich off of thumbing his nose at protests he disagrees with. Freaking genius. Come sit a spell and listen to us crow about it.
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