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cover of episode Why you're saying you can’t, but you actually can!

Why you're saying you can’t, but you actually can!

2020/10/5
logo of podcast The Positive Pants Podcast

The Positive Pants Podcast

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Why you think you can’t, but you actually can!

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How many times per day do you think about doing something that you’d LOVE to do with your life, then tell yourself you can’t?

 

If you’re anything like I used to be it’s probably considerably more than a few times a day!

 

So many of us have these dreams and ideas that come to us but then we stop ourselves with ‘I can’t’.

 

It FEELS 100% true to us.  

 

Valid ‘reasons’ why not.  

 

Or why not now, or why not me.

 

I get it, I spent a huge amount of time in that mode, I really do get it.

 

It feels awful.

 

So not only do you not have what you want, you kick yourself and beat yourself up about it.

 

What’s even WORSE if you then see someone else you know doing it! Urgh...horrendous!

 

So why have they been able to do it and you haven’t?

 

It’s just down to the way they think, which means they take action!

 

That’s it.

 

And the magic is, you can change how you think!

 

Reasons, stories, excuses. 

 

They all get in the way.  

 

UNTIL you can identify them.

 

I’m going to give you a few of my old reasons to see if they resonate with you and can help you pick out a few of your own.

 

‘It’s not the right time because…’ I actually had a lot of ‘not the right time’ reasons.  You name it I probably had it!

 

The economy, where I was in my personal life, where I was in my rental agreement at the time, where I was in the world, ha!

 

Then there were the stories I told myself about why it wasn’t a good idea.

 

These were along the lines of ‘you can’t make money that way’ or ‘there’s no way to know if you can pay your bills every month’ or ‘the marketplace is too crowded’ or ‘I don’t know enough’ or ‘people won’t pay for that’.

 

All the fun things.

 

There’s also all the ‘If I do that then it means x’ 

 

Things like, ‘It means i’d be letting people down’.  ‘I’d have to financially struggle’, ‘I could never go on holiday because it wouldn’t be paid’, ‘I’d miss out on maternity leave’, ‘I wouldn’t get healthcare’, ‘I’d have to work on my own’.

 

Lots of really random things that are really easily rectified if you think about them up front.

 

Lots of surface level reasons, that look really valid at first glance, so why would you think to challenge them?

 

But the bottom line is, these are usually not ‘reasons’ at all.  

 

They’re excuses.  They’re excuses and stories that we tell ourselves as truth.  A truth that then drives 95-99% of our behaviour.  But the real truth runs far deeper to the ‘I’m scared’ to ‘I’m not good enough’ and ‘I'm not worthy of success’.

 

So the excuses are created by the more deeply rooted stuff!

 

So no WONDER so many people never get there.  It’s impossible if you don’t challenge that stuff.

 

But in 2020 I feel like there’s never been a better time to challenge the status quo.  To challenge the way you think about things.

 

To challenge your beliefs and stories around the way things ‘should’ be and start REALLY thinking about what you want.

 

The lovely Lisa Johnson was on the podcast in the last episode and we talked a bit about this and how we need to start thinking outside the box and looking at other options.

 

I’ve been on a deep learning journey over the past couple of years and really opened my eyes to the  wealth of possibilities that are out there that the majority of people don’t know about, or won’t find...because they aren’t seeking it!

 

The REAL truth is there are SO many ways for you to create the income and the life that you want but we over complicate it or just don’t see it because of this thick veil over our eyes that is our conditioning.

 

It’s why it’s so important to surround yourself with people who are thinking outside the box.  Who is doing what you want to do.  To start because you’re ready because you never will feel ‘ready’...but you CAN do it!

 

You just don’t have the knowledge yet, or your listening to the gremlins, which are tameable!

 

But my point here is it’s 100% possible.

 

And it’s possible for you!

 

You’ve just got to seek it, and say yes to the opportunities when they’re put in front of you.

 

This is why I’m talking so much about Lisa’s challenge coming up.

 

I believe it’s information everybody needs to see and hear.  

 

To show you how much we’ve over complicated so much.  To get rid of some of the stories that you have around how you run your business and how it doesn’t have to be so hard.

 

I WANT you to see what’s possible because I believe it’s so possible for you!!

 

There’s still time to get into the Race to recurring revenue challenge which starts on the 12th October.  The link is in the show notes and in my bio on Instagram @imfranexcell.

 

I urge you to do the free challenge.  

 

Even if you just have a tiny spark of an idea, or even if you haven’t got a clue just yet, because you WILL! 

 

Recurring revenue is a game changer.  It can change your whole outlook on employment being the ‘safe’ option.

 

We need to challenge that idea because it’s just not true anymore.  There are job losses everywhere and a crazy amount of competition for the jobs that are out there.

 

This is something you can build alongside your job, or as a new stream of revenue to your current business.

 

I know I talk about business all the time but I also know I have a huge amount of listeners who dream about having a business and don’t have one yet for whatever reason, usually an outdated story.

 

One of my favourite presuppositions of NLP is ‘if it’s possible in the world, it’s possible for me.’ Because it really is true.

 

It really is!

 

You just have to give your brain the evidence that it’s possible.

 

If you’ve been with me for any amount of time you know I’m always talking about how your unconscious mind is driving 95-99% of your behaviour.

 

Your thoughts create your emotions, which lead to your actions or micro actions which lead to your results.

 

So let’s use an example here.

 

You have a dream, or an idea.

 

The first thought is along the lines of ‘I don’t know where to start’ or ‘I don’t have time’ consciously, but unconsciously you might really be thinking ‘i’m not good enough’.

 

You may unconsciously be trying to protect yourself from failing, or judgement, or something else.

 

So that’s the REAL thought that will drive the behaviour, often, of just not doing anything, not taking opportunities.

 

So the results are of course, that you don’t have that thing you want.

 

Thus reinforcing the belief that you ‘can’t’ have it or do it.

 

SO...if you can dig out those REAL unconscious thoughts BENEATH the excuses you can change the emotions around it.

 

Your thoughts and emotions could become ‘I know I can do this and if I time block it in I can absolutely get it done’, you see it turning into hope and excitement.

 

Then that hope and excitement cause you to take the action to time block it in, work out your finances so it’s possible, find the opportunities, the mentors or anything else that can help you and the results are you get the thing you want!

 

You get the success that you want.

 

Then that’s going to reinforce that you CAN do it.

 

And your brain will then make it easier for you to do next time, and even easier the time after that. 

 

Because through all those little behaviours that you take and get good results from, it’s going to reinforce that taking action is good.

 

That your brain doesn’t need to ‘protect’ you.

 

That’s what the majority of these negative thoughts and beliefs are.  

 

They are protection mechanisms in your brain and your body to stop you doing something ‘unfamiliar’.

 

There’s a higher positive intention.

 

All you need to do is weed the real thoughts out first that get in your way.  Then there’s nothing REALLY in your way anymore.

 

Sure, there will be obstacles that you need to find a practical solution for….but the difference is that you’ll know you WILL.

 

That’s the thing.  

 

The only difference between you and the person who has the success you want is the action piece.

 

So if we can change some of the thoughts and beliefs to ones that will allow you to take the action, it becomes easier and easier every time we do.

 

Then there’s really nothing stopping you.

 

So, even starting small will make a huge difference. Like joining a free challenge for example (wink wink nudge nudge to the Race to recurring revenue challenge!) to see the potential possibilities that are out there.

 

It starts to feed your brain the right information to make it easier for you to do the things you want to do.

 

I always say to new clients, the hardest part is the yes...but the magic is just after.

 

It’s like a jolt to your brain that things are going to be different.

 

A lot of people say ‘the transformation is in the transaction’ and actually it’s true of anything where you take massive action despite the fear.

 

Despite the inner meanie in your head getting louder.

 

That’s POWERFUL.

 

So if you’re listening and you have the spark of an idea.  Or you want to launch something outside your comfort zone.

 

Just join the challenge, or reach out to me on Instagram and i’ll give you my honest opinion on if I think it’s right for you or not.

 

I mean, what have you really got to lose?

 

I know you can achieve the success you want, and you will too!

 

Fx